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Ranma 1/2
Chef: Akane
by James Epnett
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Notes: While I am working on Twilight of the Dead,
I've decided to re-post some of my older works.
This was one of my first ever stories, so please
forgive its roughness, though people seemed to
think it was okay. ^_^
Oh, and for all those in the unknown: Cloud and Ku
Manji are two sub-characters I created a while
back, for no real reason, and decided to work into
short stories. Basically, they are two cousins who
are martial artists (and only mediocre ones
compared to Ranma) who moved to back to Japan after
the death of their families at the hand of a rogue
martial arts master. They are both in Highschool,
and are friends of the Tendo family (their father's
were old friends with Soun)
So, please C&C! Let me know what you think. ^_^
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The look of frustration on Cloud�s face was plain
for all to witness, even though no one was there to
see it. He looked into the empty ice box and his
heart sank. He *knew* he should have let Ku go to
the market before he left on his training mission.
* * *
�I can handle it,� Cloud had said, noting the
look of disbelief on his cousin's face.
�If your sure,� Ku responded as he exited the
house, �I will be gone for a month.�
�Don�t worry about it, I�m a big boy,� said
Cloud, a hint of anxiety in his voice at his
cousin�s concern. �But you may want to leave some
money. I�m not good enough with Bonsai Trees to
sell them.�
�You could always go to the Cat Cafe.� Ku
smiled, his cousin�s sudden discomfort apparent.
�I think I will pass,� replied Cloud, an
image of Shampoo danced through his head.
�Why not visit Ukyo�s?� The indication in
Ku�s voice was unmistakable.
Cloud blushed slightly and turned from his
cousin.
�I�m sure than okonomiyaki is as good as
Ranma claims,� Ku continued, aware of his cousin�s
sudden color, �Or you could always stop by Ranma�s
house. I�m sure Kasumi wouldn�t mind at cooking for
one more.�
�I may just do that,� Cloud turned back to
Ku, glad for the change of topic. Cloud�s feelings
for Ukyo had been no secret to Ku, even if Ukyo
only had eyes for Ranma. He didn�t know why, but
the first time he had entered Ucchan�s with Ranma,
he had felt a warmth from the young women, a serene
kindness that had been a longed for feeling on his
part. It had been completely platonic on her level,
and that�s how Cloud intended to keep it until she
had excepted that Akane and Ranma would be
together.
�Cloud?� Ku�s voice awoke Cloud from his
waking dream.
�Huh?� Cloud managed, turning to his cousin.
�Here is 35,000 yen. This should keep you
well suited until I return.� Ku dug through his
pocket and pulled the wad of cash out.
�Yeah, this should do it.�
* * *
But it had not. Who knew that a fight with
Kuno would have been so expensive. Cloud looked
around at all the repairs that had been made after
their encounter. Luckily, Kuno had brought his
stick with him rather than a real sword, and it had
lasted almost no time against Cloud�s Chinese
Broadsword. No time at all was long enough,
however. Kuno had done a fair amount of damage
before he had left, excepting the fact that Ku was
no where to be found. <What an idiot,> Cloud had
thought. <The �Blue Blunder� is gonna� mess with me
once to often.>
He looked once more at the ice box, his
stomach growling harshly. There was only one thing
for it. He would set out for the Tendo Dojo soon.
* * *
Cloud looked at the front entrance to the
house, the door opened wide. He walked closer to it
and looked in. �Hello,� he called, knocking on the
door frame. A sudden sour-sweet smell filled his
nostrils. It was pleasant, but smelled a
little...off.
�Who is it?� A light voice called from the
kitchen as Akane walked swiftly into the hall.
�It�s Cloud,� he said, waiting for the young
women to reach the door. �May I come in?�
�Sure, come on in.� Akane politely called,
smiling as she neared the door.
Cloud pulled his shoes from his feet and
entered the house.
�What�s up?� asked Akane, escorting Cloud
into the family room.
�Not much. I was finding it quite lonely at
my home, to tell the truth,� he replied, sitting
across from Akane at the coffee table.
�Would you like some tea?� Akane asked, still
standing.
�Yes please.� Cloud�s stomach growled and he
cleared his throat, hoping Akane hadn�t heard.
Akane made for the kitchen, and Cloud
continued to talk,
�Actually, I was wondering if you had an
extra spot at the dinner table tonight. With Ku out
of town, I have neither the funds or skill to cook
for myself.�
�I�m sure we can fit you in,� Akane called.
�Actually, we were just about to have lunch.�
�We?� asked Cloud, scanning the room for
other people.
�Ranma and I, that is.�
�Where is Ranma?�
�He�s in the Dojo, training.�
�Where are everyone else?� Cloud asked, a
deep sense of foreboding washing over every fiber
of his being.
�Mr. Saotome, father, and Happosai are out
*training*.� Akane�s last word was acid. Cloud
flinched unconsciously.
�Nabiki had *buisness* to take care of, and
Kasumi went to Dr. Tofu�s clinic to barrow a few
medical books.�
�So that means....� Cloud froze, suddenly
wishing he had stayed home.
�That�s right,� Ranma was suddenly in the
door that led to the garden out back. �Akane is
cooking.�
Cloud�s stomach sank, nausea washed over him.
He did not want to be disrespectful, but the memory
of his last meal prepared by Akane and Dr. Tofu�s
stomach pump filled his mind.
�I would not want to impose on you...� He did
not finish, Akane was back in the room with a tray
that carried three glasses of tea and three bowls.
�Not at all,� said Akane, placing the tray on
the table. Cloud looked longingly into the bowl. It
couldn�t be *that* bad.
<Oh god,> he thought suddenly, <She's been
experimenting.> The sight in the bowl was *not* a
pretty one. It *looked* like scrambled eggs, but
was covered in a dark brown sauce.
Cloud�s face drained of color. He reached for
the glass of tea Akane had brought to him and drank
as much of the hot liquid as he could. If he could
burn his taste buds severely enough, he might not
need taste the substance.
�Where do you think *you�re* going?� Cloud
looked up to see Ranma edging his way for the back
door.
�I�m not really hungry, Akane...� Ranma
froze, the look on Akane�s face said it all, that
and she suddenly had a *very* large mallet in her
hand, tapping it impatiently in the other.
�I knew I came in too soon...� Ranma
whispered, taking a seat at the table. Akane
followed, sitting down in front of her space.
�Akane.� Cloud started, Akane looking up at
him, �Not to be rude, but can I ask what this is?�
Akane smiled at her friend and explained,
�It�s brown rice, silly. I�ve been trying to adapt
my own sauce based on one of Kasumi�s recipes.� She
smiled. �Try some.�
Ranma grimaced. <I never could have gotten
away with that,> he thought, looking at the bowl in
front of him.
Cloud looked down at the bowl, still
convinced that the contents were some sort of
strange egg.
Reluctantly, Cloud reached for his
chopsticks, as did Ranma. At about the same time,
both caught a clump of the substance and place it
in their mouth.
Cloud was the first to be observed, his face
becoming paler still. He chewed the rice, at the
protest of his stomach. At least his taste buds
were still slightly numb. With all the strength he
could muster, he swallowed it.
Ranma had also become pale, his right eye
began to involuntarily twitch. <What *is* this
stuff?> he thought, chewing it as best he could.
After a strained moment, he swallowed the food,
followed by a swig from of his tea.
Cloud and Ranma both looked at Akane, and
regretted it. Akane�s face was bright red as she
looked at the contents in her bowl. She sniffed at
it, but refused to eat it. �Oh no,� she said, an
annoyed look crossing her face, �I think I used too
much anchovy paste.� she whispered, as if trying
not to let the two across from her hear.
Ranma and Cloud�s eyes were like saucers.
Both calmly stood from the table. After a quick
glance at each other, both made a dashing bolt for
the bathroom, both trying to out run the other.
Akane watched in disbelief at the sight
before her. Both men ran like animals, trying to
hold back the contents of their stomach.
Ranma reached the bathroom first, slammed the
door shut, and locked it.
Cloud, unable to think, made for the closest
window. He pulled it open and leaned out.
* * *
After a few moment, Ranma exited the bathroom
holding his stomach and looking quite sick.
Cloud approached Ranma from the end of the
hall, in much the same condition.
As they made their way back to the family
room, Akane�s battle aura caught their attention.
They both looked up at her, and realized that she
held a super large mallet in her hand.
�So,� she said in a low voice, �my cooking is
that bad, is it?�
�Well,� Ranma started in a low voice, �yes.�
* * *
The two human-shaped holes in the top of the
Tendo house could be seen from almost anywhere in
the neighborhood. Ranma and Cloud fell fast from a
low orbit flight - and right into the koi pond
behind the house.
A soaked Cloud and a red hair girl both sat
upright in the pond, looking at the house. Akane
glared at them from the door.
�Baka,� she screamed, �the both of you!!� She
slammed the door closed as hard as she could.
�You know,� Ranma said looking at Cloud, �I
wish people would stop writing fan stories about
Akane�s cooking. I don�t think my stomach can take
much more.�
Cloud simply nodded.
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