*********
Usual Disclaimer:
I don't own the characters and my cousin
came up with the idea. Plus this is her
little spamfic which I'm posting because
I thought it was funny. Insert <Don't sue me>
stuff.
*********
Dear Concerned Family Member/Friend,
We received your e-mail requesting information on the symptoms of an
obsessed fan, and can only tell you this:
*if s/he has begun to hang pictures of them all over their rooms, on
binders, or notebooks, please contact us.
*if s/he seems to know ever little fact about the Slayers series, has
begun writing his/her own stories, and drawing his/her own pictures,
please
contact us.
*Also, if s/he has begun speaking in Japanese, with a speech resembling
that of the character (i.e., if girl then speaking in a boyish manner)
then
please reply soon.
*if said person has memorized all the spells or incantations that
character uses, and frequently tries to perform them with the motions,
keep
your distance.
*if s/he has recently started being attracted to beautiful guys, or ones
with wiry hair, who frequently wear capes and might have scabs on their
faces, reply immediately.
*Particularly, if s/he has been recently dressing in a costume that
resembles that character, or buying clothes that character might wear,
please immediately contact the ZOA (Zel Obsessors Anonymous) for
protection. And run far, far away.
If you know anyone exhibiting any of these symptoms, s/he needs
professional help. When approached though, they may act in a violent
manner, and deny the need for assistance. Just remain calm and back away
slowly, and try to keep a brick wall between yourself and them should
they
believe you are making fun of their character. Just remember: Run. Run.
Run. And whatever you do, don't stop.
Sincerely,
Zel Lovers Anonymous (ZLA)
************
End spamfic
You can send comments to muteki@juno.com and I'll pass them
along to my cousin. She would be on the list, but her e-mail
address won't allow it. -_-
Murasakikaze
************
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