MA VIE ET BOISSONS Part 2
Skyler looked up to see a floating platform with two outlandish
looking people standing (or perhaps "posing" was a better word) on it.
"At last we have found you again! Prepare to be defeated by the
combined beauty of Narcissus Dandy--" The bronze-skinned man looked
like a parody of male body sculptors, down to the twitching pecs when
he flexed.
"--And Pheremone Lip! Ahan!" The woman, seemingly the
definition of top-heavy blonde bimbo, cupped her breasts and jiggled
them in a move Skyler found vaguely repellent rather than sexy.
"Sez you!" Lamuness shook his fist at them. "Let's do it!"
<snip kick-ass robot summoning and mecha battle.>
Lamuness and Skyler were beamed to the ground as Kaiser Fire
returned to its origin point.
"My DNA says you aren't such a loser after all, Skyler. But
where the heck did you come up with that `Form Blazing Sword' line?"
asked Lamuness.
"Umm...a cartoon I watched when I was younger."
"You *are* an old man."
"Thanks a bunch, little buddy."
"Grr..."
"Hey guys, we've got to go!" yelled Parfait, and the party headed off.
Behind them, a pile of rubble shifted, and a man with purple hair
crawled out. "Two minutes...is not enough..."
A yellow snake popped out of his shoulderpad. "I think we're too
late, Darling."
<much later>
"My DNA tells me this is the way!"
"Don't--"
#CRASH# "Ow! Owie! Itai!"
Skyler winced as Lamuness slammed into yet another tree. [Now I
know how Max Mercury feels when he works with Impulse.]
He would have thought having a triple-digit IQ would be an
advantage in this series. But no, Lamuness never listened to Skyler,
preferring the counsel of his DNA (which did not seem terribly
interested in its host's survival.)
Things had gotten worse with the arrival of Da Cider, who
seemingly hadn't matured past the bad-pun-loving maniac he'd been in
the first series. He also was constantly trying to show up both
Skyler and Lamuness to become "the only true Brave."
Cacao was nice, but tended to live in a reality five degrees off
from everyone else. The shoulder mascots only really interacted with
their owners. Which left Parfait as the only reasonable person to
talk with--or it would, if she didn't keep going into jealous snits
every time Lamuness paid attention to another girl.
The only thing saving this motley band was the fact that their
enemies were even stupider. Narcissus and Pheromone combined had less
brains than your average penguin. The only reasons Skyler hadn't
mercifully killed them were a) a lingering ethical sense, as they just
barely qualified as sentient life; and b) the fear that the true
villain, Don Genosai, would hire somebody competent to replace them.
"Hey, this must be the right one!" #CRASH#
Skyler sighed and moved to help extricate Lamuness from his latest
pitfall.
To be Concluded,
SKJAM!