Thanks to Ammadeau, Donny Cheng, Alan Harnum, Richard Lawson,
and the C*B*L for pre-reading duties.
Characters belong to Gainax, and they need the money more than I
do probably - unless they get audited for fun.
P A G E S
by Lara Bartram
---------------
Page 31
He glanced at the clock again. Yui had been gone eight
hours already and he didn't think she'd be back any time soon.
Looking around the apartment, the preparations he had made,
Gendo frowned.
This was ridiculous; he couldn't sit around and wait, and
she shouldn't have been working so much. Cursing under his
breath, Gendo left everything as it was and exited the
apartment.
Yui had skipped lunch, and that had been a huge mistake.
If she had been tired in the morning, then she was dead now, and
still had a couple hours to finish things up for the day.
"I'll see you Tuesday, Yui," Satoshi said as he was about
to leave.
"Bye, Satoshi." She didn't remove her eyes from the data
she was looking over though. The sound of the door opening
registered to her, but not the fact that Satoshi had left. Or
that someone else had arrived.
"You really shouldn't be here when we're trying to do
serious work."
Yui looked up at the sound of Professor Fuyutsuki's voice.
For a moment, she thought he was talking to her and was very
confused. But he wasn't looking in her direction.
"It's time to go, Yui."
She turned and saw Gendo standing just inside the doorway.
Her face lit up immediately. "Gen... do! What are you doing
here?"
"My question exactly," Fuyutsuki said, obviously without
the delight that Yui had expressed.
Ignoring Fuyutsuki completely, Gendo fixed his solemn gaze
on Yui. "I'm here to take you home, Yui. So you can get a
decent meal and get some rest. You don't need to work yourself
this hard for anything."
"Gendo, I shouldn't," she said apologetically.
"Yes, we're trying to do work, something you probably
wouldn't really know anything about." Fuyutsuki folded his arms
and glared at Gendo.
"Professor, I'm going to step out for a few moments to
speak with Gendo," Yui said quietly, keeping her eyes trained on
her visitor. She wasn't angry with him at all; she was just...
"No, you're not. If you're going to 'step outside' it'll
be for the evening, not for a few moments," Gendo said evenly.
"I suggest you leave before I call security. Ms. Ikari
has made it perfectly clear that she's not going to..."
"Shut your mouth before I knock you unconscious," warned
Gendo, his teeth clenched.
It did quiet Fuyutsuki out of sheer surprise.
"Gendo! What are you talking about?"
Gendo grabbed everything of Yui's he could identify, the
strode forward and took her hand. "I'm looking after your best
interests. I'm not asking you to quit; I'm making you leave two
hours early _one_ night."
He began pulling her toward the door, disregarding all her
half-hearted protests.
"I guess I'm leaving early tonight, Professor," she said
finally as Gendo opened the door. She gave him a weak smile and
an even weaker wave.
As the door closed, Kozo could only release a muted growl
of frustration.
"Gendo, why did you do that?" Yui asked. She wasn't mad,
but still wanted an explanation.
"Because you're working too much, and I think you need
someone to pamper you. And not just on the days you're too
tired to do anything."
Excitement began to bubble up in Yui. With every step
closer to the apartment, the more she clutched at Gendo's arm
---
Page 32
"I have candles, but..."
Yui stared at the dinner waiting for her and almost
started crying. "You did this for me?"
"Of course I did. I wouldn't for anyone else, and you
deserve it, instead of just eating something instant before
bed."
"Why didn't you just say something?"
Gendo scoffed. "That wouldn't have mattered, and you know
it." He removed the lab coat she was still in, and then the
pull-over sweater. "Sit down. I'm sure it's still warm. I was
stupidly thinking you might be back early tonight, without me
having to get you."
Yui nodded and sat at the table, watching Gendo hurry to
the kitchen in the dimmed lamplight. She swallowed nervously,
not sure why.
It was simple, but it was hot and it wasn't instant, and
that was good enough for Yui. There was candlelight, just
enough steaming sake for two, and hot tea for after the ice
cream.
Gendo leaned back, sipping his tea, against the small
couch. Looking at Yui over the lip of his glass, he rubbed his
thigh in invitation.
Yui went to him and sat against him, his arm going around
her waist. They sat quietly that way, drinking their tea and
just gazing at the flickering candlelight.
"The time is right, isn't it?" she whispered, holding her
now empty glass tightly.
"I can't answer that, Yui. Only you can, but... it
doesn't matter to me what you decide. I'll still love you.
That's why I did this for you." He kissed the side of her head
and set his glass on the floor.
"It hasn't been very long in this apartment. Does it feel
like home to you?" she asked, now staring at the glass in her
hand while her other held Gendo's hand tightly.
"Only because you're here."
Yui sighed. Setting her glass down first, she stood and
tugged Gendo's hand. When he stood, she led him back to the
bedroom. "Just so you know..." she started to say.
"Don't say anything like I think you were just going to,"
Gendo said, stopping in the bedroom doorway.
"Can I just say... I think it's... right?"
"If that's what you think."
"You're not helping me at all."
Smiling softly, Gendo shrugged. "I can't help you. In
fact, I don't want to help you. This is your decision, but...
I'll go along with whatever you want."
"You're infuriating."
"Just like you."
Yui pulled away from Gendo and crossed the room to lean
against the wall next to their shared sleeping space. Her mouth
was very dry as she watched him approach, unbuttoning his shirt
and pulling it off. Nervousness, but no fear.
For some reason, she expected him to say something, to
play the movie-style romantic predator, but there was none of
that. He just leaned forward and kissed her, using the
distraction to begin removing her shirt. It was finally time
that she wasn't going to hold back.
As Gendo pulled her shirt off, her hands blindly worked at
his belt. Yui's mind was in a pleasant haze of... nothing
basically as Gendo didn't stop with her shirt, and she got his
pants the rest of the way undone.
She went so far as to help him when he started on her
slacks, and before Yui even realized it, she was, along with
Gendo, mostly naked.
"Still the right time?" Gendo whispered, breathing heavily
as he moved his hands over every portion of her bare skin he
could reach.
Yui, eyes half-lidded, nodded. Stopping, at that moment,
would probably be something she would hate herself for. "Still
right," she said and laid down on their sleeping mats. "So what
are you waiting for?"
"One last thing." Gendo laid down next to her and pulled
the blankets over them before removing the final obstacles
between them.
---
Mysterion
You still remain
My power, my pleasure, my pain
- Seal
Even in the darkness of the bedroom, it felt too open. Under the
covers, there was a measure of freedom, there was complete privacy and
solitude.
"I have to say this..."
"You don't have to say anything."
"No, this I do. I love you. I wouldn't be doing this unless I
did." She wanted to tell him the rest, but it felt silly and ultimately
unnecessary.
Fortunately, he sensed her hesitation. "You are perfect," he
whispered and kissed her lips gently. With one arm bracing his body, he
brushed the hair away from her face with his opposite hand. "I love you
too, and... I'll be gentle."
Guilty relief washed over Yui. She was just happy she hadn't been
forced to say it; it was just too embarrassing. Instead of speaking
further, she kissed him, deep, languid contact.
The feel of his body against her own, both bare and slick with
sweat from the summer heat, was new and a little frightening. Yet she
wouldn't have wanted it any other way, with anyone else.
There was a distinct image in her mind, of the final two pieces of
a puzzle fitting together, and then fitting in to the whole. Whether
that puzzle was her, just her life or something larger, she didn't care;
the only thing that mattered was that the two pieces separated for so
long were finally united.
Yui broke the kiss and smiled, feeling her heart pound in her
chest. If only she could vocalize, explain just how right it was...
"What is it?" he whispered, panting on her cheek.
"Nothing. Just keep going," she replied, running one hand down
Gendo's back. "I don't want you to stop."
His entire body quivering with need, Gendo kissed down her neck,
his need intensifying as their bodies slid against one another.
There was a powerful urge in him to just complete the deed, find
his own satisfaction, but just looking at Yui's face would not allow him
to do that. Making her happy really was the single goal he had in his
previously empty life.
Shifting his body so he was on his side next to her, he continued
to cover her neck with kisses, letting his hand travel slowly down from
her shoulder. The skin was smooth, flawless as he moved over the
initial swell of her breast, and then finally he felt her nipple jutting
out.
Yui sighed with pleasure and excitement. This contact was
familiar, but the circumstances were new and more thrilling than she had
imagined they'd be. This was a moment she'd thought about, dreamt
about, fantasized about more than she'd ever admit, even to Gendo.
But if he continued to tease her, torture her, he'd find that she
wasn't content to just allow him to lead. She'd take matters into her
own hands.
Her hands weren't idle though; she liked the way his body had been
so close to hers, his weight pressing down on her. Letting her own hand
trail over his shoulder, her fingertips tracing a path down his upper
arm, stopping to squeeze it briefly...
A soft cry escaped her lips and her body arched involuntarily as
Gendo's fingers pinched her sensitive flesh while he suckled intently on
her earlobe. Only for a moment did she allow herself to get distracted;
her hand was soon moving down his forearm, across her chest, until it
was over his, squeezing it lovingly, exerting gentle pressure.
He responded, covering her breast with his hand and cupping it.
It was getting more difficult to control himself though, and he let his
hand drift down.
With Yui's hand still covering his, Gendo moved over her smooth
stomach, rubbing it gently and then continuing on. She was bold, he
would give her that, feeling her other hand begin to stroke his thigh
while he moved their hands together to her inner thigh.
Squirming a little at the ticklish feeling, Yui almost
inadvertently moved Gendo's hand up to her eagerly awaiting sex. His
touch, when it finally came, was foreign, but exciting, and she knew she
couldn't wait any longer or risk exploding.
Forcing his hand away, Yui tried to pull him over so he would be
on top of her, but couldn't quite manage it. "Damn it," she growled
quietly in frustration.
Grinning to himself, Gendo did as she wished and retook his
position on top of her, moving her hand over her head. Making a deep,
thoughtful noise from the back of his throat, he just looked at her for
a moment.
"Gen-chan." Her eyes were half-lidded as she looked at him,
running her fingers through his hair.
He smiled gently at her. "Yui." He closed his eyes as he lowered
his head to kiss her. The feeling was like everything he had ever
wanted in the world was contained within this single moment.
Yui cried out in pain. It was sharp, but didn't linger, and it
wasn't unexpected. Still, it was uncomfortable, and left her a bit
shaken. For several breath-catching moments, she lay there, clinging to
him with her arms around his neck, and just experienced the act.
It was a bit odd that Gendo didn't stop, but then, if she had
really wanted him to, she would have said something. A child she was
not and couldn't expect to be treated like one in the midst of such an
adult activity.
"Gen-chan," she whispered, her fingers moving through his hair.
Eyes still closed, Gendo paused, though he didn't speak. Yui was
a mystery to him, and even if he never solved her, this really was the
one thing in the world he wanted. To be so ultimately close, to be one
with her...
In the darkness, Yui saw a single tear slide down Gendo's cheek.
Feeling the sudden lump in her throat, she touched his face and felt the
track of the tear. "Oh, Gen-chan..." Not knowing anything else to say,
she pulled him down and kissed him, feeling his body tremble ever so
slightly.
His arms went under her body and held her tightly, his eyes
closed. As long as they were close, the moment wouldn't end; they would
always be together.
The emotion of it all overcoming her, Yui started to move against
him, her earlier pain forgotten. For some reason, maybe stereotypes or
cliches, she expected him to go into a frenzy, but she certainly didn't
expect him to move so tenderly.
Holding her to him, as if she might be snatched away, Gendo
treasured the experience. So entrenched in the moment, he missed the
pleasure he had caused Yui.
"Tell me what's wrong," she said, more concerned with his odd
behavior than the euphoria she had experienced.
"I... don't ever want this to end. I don't ever want to lose
you."
She could almost hear the desperation in his voice. "You won't,"
Yui whispered, just holding him. "You'll always have this moment with
me; no one can ever take that away."
Upon hearing those words, with a single grunt, he stiffened
against her for a moment, moved briefly and stiffened again.
Her concern for the lack of birth control flashed briefly in Yui's
mind until she really looked at Gendo's face. The expression she saw
there was almost tortured. "Gendo..."
"Everything I am is for you," he said in a voice so low Yui could
barely hear it. After that, he pulled away, leaving his arms around her
body loosely.
Confused by his behavior, Yui simply looked up into the darkness.
There was one definite she found in their act: their love was never to
be in doubt again.
She smiled then, arranging herself closer to him so she could hear
his deep, even breathing and feel it on her skin. Softly so she didn't
wake him, she kissed him, then whispered, "I won't let go."
---
Page 33
Yui woke up, and for the first time since she had started
on the project full time, Gendo was still asleep next to her.
Gazing at him for a few short moments, she let her eyes close
and went back to sleep.
The smell coming from the kitchen was heavenly. It was
accompanied by a gentle humming that was music to his ears.
Gendo sat up and scratched his head. He didn't regret what they
had done, but...
That was it. They were as good as hitched. At least that
was probably what Yui was thinking. He certainly didn't...
Well, not just because they...
What was the use in denying it? Sighing, Gendo got up and
put on some clothes. Before exiting the room, he tossed their
discarded clothing into a pile against the wall and fished their
undergarments out of the blankets as well. It was a small
thing, cleaning up, when Yui did so much more.
"How did you do this to me, Yui?" he asked himself, not
even aware how she had taken over his life so completely.
"Well good morning!" Yui almost threw herself into his
arms as she kissed him. "Glad to see you awake finally."
"And why is that?" Gendo asked, putting his arms around
her waist.
"Because you're so much more entertaining when you're
awake," Yui said, grinning at him.
"Who would have known you'd turn out to be such a..."
"Quiet, you."
Gendo smiled as Yui put her fingers over his lips.
"Okay," he said and kissed her fingertips. "So how are you this
morning?"
"Better than fine," she replied and moved back into the
kitchen. "It might sound silly, but I want to thank you."
Gendo followed and poured himself a glass of juice.
"Why?"
"For not pushing."
"Well, I don't know about that. I mean, it's a two step
process."
"Not that! You _know_ what I mean!"
"Yeah, but... I like to see you riled up."
Yui blushed and turned her attention back to breakfast.
She tried to reply with something, but was just too embarrassed.
"I... I just made you speechless?" Gendo gasped. "I need
to write this on a calendar. Quick! Get me a calendar!"
"Ha ha. Very funny. But I'm serious." She turned and
smiled. "It really was right."
"I'm glad." The sudden cross look on her face made him
rethink his words. "I'm happy it worked out then."
"You make it sound like... like some plan when you talk
like that. Like you've lost your emotions and can only respond
with logic and ration." Yui looked up from the still-cooking
breakfast.
Gendo was looking at her flatly. He arched an eyebrow.
"I see."
Yui grinned in spite of herself. "As long as you don't
try that tonight we won't have a problem."
"Eager too. That's definitely in your favor." Not that
she really needed anything else in her favor, but he thought it
would be tasteless to mention a thing like that to her.
"What's that look on your face? What are you daydreaming
about?"
"Not a thing," Gendo answered, trying not to think too far
ahead. He would have to wait all day, and that wouldn't be fun.
Yui wasn't fooled. "Ruled by your hormones," she said,
shaking her head. "Just as I thought."
"It's not hormones, Yui. It's emotion. I've... done the
hormone thing, and this isn't it."
"And you didn't love those others?" she asked, skeptical.
"Not the way I love you. Not even close."
---
Page 34
"Her?"
"Are you trying to set me up?"
"No, I'm just curious."
"Fine, just because you're curious though. I'm fully expecting
you to get mad at me for this, but... she's not bad."
"Better than me?"
"Of course not."
Yui smiled. "Are you sure?"
"Positive. She's not nearly as shapely as you are. And her
breasts are..."
"That's enough! I believe you." Every chance he got, he was sure
to demonstrate his... Superiority was the wrong word. But he sure
liked to shoot his mouth off. "Besides, she doesn't know how to
coordinate," Yui added.
"And nothing beats a woman that can coordinate," Gendo said,
raising his glass in a toast.
"Don't be so silly. That's just..." Yui shrugged. "That was how
I was raised: to always be doubtful of how I compared to other women."
She looked down at her drink, swirling it around a bit. "Gendo."
"Yeah?"
She looked up at him, and the change in her mood was like night
and day. "How many others have there been?"
Gendo blinked. "Other what?"
"Women, of course. How many women before me have you been with?"
"Uh... I don't..."
"The truth."
"Not many." Gendo laughed a little. "I've been 'switched on' for
seventeen years. You can't really expect me to not..."
Yui shook her head. "Oh, I don't. I'm just curious to know. I
mean, hormones and all..."
"When are you going to drop that?"
"Not as long as it continues to apply. And you're so much fun to
tease."
"Quiet yourself. I'm trying to tell you something."
Yui snorted.
"Three. Before you. Nothing all that serious."
"Before me."
Gendo grinned. "Before you." Just as he thought. "Now it's my
turn to ask you something."
"Uh oh."
"What do you expect from me? Honestly, what do you want from me?"
He leaned on his elbows on the table.
"What do I want from you? Well... I don't know." She shrugged
and wrinkled her nose in a way that said she knew, but was too
embarrassed to say.
"Yes, I'm stupid. Tell me anything and I'll believe it."
"Well..." Yui avoided looking at Gendo, keeping a close eye on
her fingers instead. "Just... you know. The usual stuff."
"The usual stuff? No, I'm afraid I don't know what that is."
Sighing, Yui glanced up at Gendo, then looked back at her fingers.
This was a lot harder than she'd imagined. After... after the sex, it
should have been a snap. "Just... the two of us. Together." She
shrugged and meant it. "You know."
She looked at him, and there was an openness, innocence there that
had helped him fall so completely for her so that he knew exactly what
she meant.
"You... don't have to say anything else, Yui," he managed to say.
"I... think I know what you're getting at." Lord help him, he knew.
'Just don't ask it, please.'
"You do?" she asked hopefully. "Then... can I ask you something?"
---
lara@emunix.emich.edu
http://www.thekeep.org/~lara/index.html