Subject: Re: [FFML] [Ranma][DBZ][xover]Dragon Ball R1/2: Chapter Seven
From: Donny Cheng
Date: 9/27/1999, 8:22 PM
To: Miashara
CC: ffml@fanfic.com



Miashara wrote:

Okeydokey. Here we go.

        He hadn't really been surprised.  His expectations still did not
prepare him for the awful truth, though.  His son was not a Saiyajin.

Bulma cheated?

Nah, thinking figuratively.


        Vejita was not fooled by the stillness however and soon, just as he
thought, the body disappeared.  *Up there,* he predicted as he fired a
ki blast over top of him.  He was surprised as he saw the touch of gold
in the color of the hair out from the corner of his eye.  *Already?*

He thought that should do it with his previous hit. Why is he surprised
now?

Usually if you've seen the fights, the Saiyajin takes about five minutes
to change :P
He didn't expect it to be so fast, but Trunks and Goten are slightly
different from the others in that their changes are instantaneous.

        Vejita looked up to see Trunks hovering above him as he shook off the
bout of dizziness that had overcome him.  A large ball of ki formed in
the boy's hands.  Vejita quickly formed ki blast in response in hopes of
being able to deflect most of the damage.  Then all of a sudden, a light
of sanity appeared in the boy's eyes, and just as quickly as the
transformation took place, Trunks de-powered and fell limply out of the
sky.

Well, that was quick. And here I was expecting an epic battle.

There might have been if I was a better writer.  I can't do epic
battles.

        Trunks had reached the next stage in his development and would probably
be able to do it again without any help.  But to Vejita it mattered
little without the soul behind it.  Trunks had once again proved that
despite being able to transform, ultimately, his human side ruled over
his soul.  However, even with all this on his mind, there was one other
thought that bothered Vejita more than his son's failure as a Saiyajin.
It was something he felt when he heard Trunks whisper 'father'.  Relief.

His problem isn't he's human. I know plenty of human's with enough
bloodlust to make and Sayajin proud. He just doesn't have the killer
instinct. Of course, I can see this 'weakness' being attributed to his
human side.

<nods>  Which is how Vejita sees it.

        "Ack, and I thought I left all that back in Nerima."

I think Ranma would not be surprised when both Bra and Pan are after
him. After all, he's Ranma, the great Ranma.

True, probably add a line in there.

        "Good job, boy.  You made your father proud.  We'll do some more
sparring later.  Don't worry, you'll get use to it."

        *Get used to hitting Pop?  I didn't like it when I got angry at him.*

I think, given Ranma's character, even at the tender age of six he'd
feel proud. Besides, his father told him he did something right. That
young, paternal praise is mana from heaven, especially from a father
like Genma.

I think Ranma's character changed from when he was young not expanded
upon.  This is still when he remembers having had a mother, having lived
in a home, etc... With his father being his closest family member, it
would be the equivalent hitting his mother to him I would think. 
Equating getting hit with getting hurt especially as this scene depicts
the first actual time he got into a fight.

        "I don't.  Thinking's not my thing," Ranma grinned.  He pointed to his
fist.  "This is.  So, you up for that sparring contest now?"

        "Always," Trunks grinned.

>From someone who fights as little as Trunks does, I don't think he'd
answer 'always.'

Maybe 'of course' would be better or something similar then.

He still won an hour later, but it
felt much more satisfying than outright overpowering his opponent as he
had done in the past Tenkaichi-budokai.

I have a hard time believing Trunks is Ranma's equal in shear skill or
cunning. Without using his greater strength and speed, of which he has
copious amounts to be sure, I doubt he'd win at all.

Trunks maybe holding back but like Pan and Vejita in the previous
fights, would not hold back so as to lose the fight.  The saiyajins have
an exreme control over their chi and could place it at any level the
wish.  Not hard to stay just a step up from Ranma.  There's a difference
in not using his full abilities and not outright overpowering Ranma.

        Bulma and Chi-Chi rolled their eyes as their respective husbands walked
in.  "Chi-Chi's decided to stay a few days since we haven't seen each
other in a long time."

Oh. They're surprised? Why?

Rolled their eyes means that they weren't suprised.

        "Thinking of the human?" Nail asked.  Ever since he heard of the boy
Vejita was training, he had noticed a decidedly noticeable change in the
natural order of the planet.

Ranma still has an immense power level. If Vegita thinks
 he's roughly level with him when he cam to earth, as you said last
chapter, he could probably destroy the world.

Which means nothing really to the DBZ crew.   Even to someone like Nail
who hasn't fought in over twenty years.  Nail was the strongest Namek on
their homeworld.

        "One colony is one colony," Nail replied.  "He is but one man.  Seems
fair."

Ooooh. Ancient hatred and incredible fighting. Of course, Vegita would
decicrate Nail. But then, something interesting always seems to pop up.

Well Nail and Piccolo are going to remerge later on.  If Piccolo was
super Namek before... ^_^

Nice chapter. And write more frequently. I get impatient.

Will try, but usually have a ton of other projects.

The End. (maybe)

Yeah right. Not after leaving that hanging.

Force of habit.

Miashara

Thanks for the C&C!

-- Anime Fanboy and Fanfiction Writer ^_^ Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Ginza/4537 ICQ #: 13236148