[This was written as part of the one hour challenge last
night on FFIRC. :) I wasn't exactly sober when I wrote it.
--ed]

Maxwell Edison Theaters Present, in Proud association with
Fanfic Radioplay Productions,

"Tabasco in my Vodka" a drunken EVA fic.

A massively amazing fic that hasn't even been written yet
but soon will be.  Of course, Evangelion and characaters are
copyright by Gainax and lot's of other people who wouldn't
deign to give me the time of day, much less let me use their
characters.

Warning: There is no plot innvolved.

MUSIC: LOUNGE LIZARD PIANO ROLL / UP

SOUND: A COCKTAIL PARTY, GLASSES CLINK (UNDER)

SHINJI: But umm, I don't like alcohol, Misato.

ASUKA: Listen, third child, it's a tradition.

SHINJI: Umm, but what is, (BEAT) "Tabasco"?

ASUKA: Oh, quit being such a worry wart and drink it.  Look,
it hasn't killed the other two stooges...

SHINJI: (grunts)

ASUKA: So it can't be deadly. (WHISPERING) Listen, drink it
and I'll leave you alone for two days.

SHINJI: Umm... Hmm... Uhh... Oh, all right.

SOUND: FLUID (LIQUOR) BEING POURED INTO A SHOTGLASS
SOUND: A CLINK (A SMALL BOTTLE)

SHINJI: But what's this Tabasco stuff?

ASUKA: (PEEVED) Drink it Dumkopf!

SOUND: A GULP

(A PAUSE)

SHINJI: (SCREAMS) Water! Water! Water!

ASUKA: Here ya' go Shinji.

SOUND: LIQUID BEING POURED INTO A CUP

SOUND: GULP x 4

MISATO: Asuka. That was... Dirty.

ASUKA: Oh, a little Vodka won't hurt him.

MISATO: That... Was not a (WITH EMPHASIS) little Vodka.

SHINJI: (HICCUPS) Hmm. Thas' not water Ash'ka. Gimme s'more.

ASUKA: Ok, third child.

MISATO: Who would've guessed. Commander Ikari is not going
to be happy.

SHINJI: Sssh'ok. I know what I'm doin'.

ASUKA: More, third child?

TRANSITION: LIQUID BEING POURED INTO A CUP

MUSIC: A twangy Country Western number up and out with a
flourish

SOUND: SNORING (ASUKA AND MISATO)
SOUND: LIGHT SWITCH (CLICK)
SOUND: DOOR CLOSING
SOUND: VOMITING (MUFFLED)
SOUND: TOILET FLUSH
SOUND: LIGHT SWITCH (CLICK), DOOR OPENS, FOOTSTEPS x 6 AND
RUSTLING OF BLANKETS

SHINJI: Ugh. Yuck. Where am I? What happened?

SOUND: A LAMP CHAIN IS PULLED

SHINJI: Kaji? What are you doing here?

KAJI: I passed out at the UN party, trying to drink you
under the table. I ended up in the hospital with a stomach
pump. You managed to sleep it off.

SHINJI: Uhh.

MUSIC: "Fly me to the Moon" by Frank Sinatra

FADE OUT.

FIN.