This is just an update

These characters are the based on Takahashi Rumiko's manga series Ranma 1/2, 
and no copyright infringement is intended on this work.

Hey this is my first Ranma 1/2 fic. I have done so don't kill me because it 
isn't very good

Ranma 1/2
Title: Who am I?: Part 1 Meet Joe Black

< > Chinese
<* *> English
() Thought





    Time: Second week before the beginning of school in Japan.
    Place: Tendo Dojo

    Kasumi walks into the dinning room with a stack of letters in her arms.  
She quickly thumbs through them to organize them for the family, after ward 
she proceeds in to the kitchen to cook breakfast.

    Nabiki stagers into the dinning room eyes the letters drowsily, and 
proceeds to gather hears she notices one labeled "To the parents/guardians of 
Ranma Soutome" and a similar one labeled for Akane.  Mumbling to herself she 
picks up Ranma's/Akane's wanders upstairs and thoughts the letters on the 
prospective people in the prospective rooms.

Akane woken by the sound of Nabiki staggering thought the house partially 
conches notices the letters lying on the floor.

    "Great just. Great school notices" she grumbles.

---------

Ranma and Genma are fighting over the pond when Akane yells "Ranma, did you 
get a letter from school this morning?"

    "Why the heck would a tomboy like you care about that?!" 

    "YOU PERVERT!!!!"

    Ranma flies thought the are into the wall of the Dojo with a saucer stuck 
to the side of his head "Aye, Akane, what the heck you do that for?!"

A fight ensues 



--------

Out side the Tendo Dojo a truck loaded with mats, dummies and an assortment 
of weapons pulls up in front of the Dojo. The driver hops out after 
straitening a small dream catcher on the revue mirror and listens to the 
fight raging behind the Dojo walls. <*Smeg, boy people sure can be violent in 
Japan.... Now where the heck is Furiken High? *> He calmly asks no one 
enparticular.

The driver is wearing a faded pair of jeans, leather hiking boots, a white 
T-shirt, and an off white long sleeved shirt tied around his waist. His hair 
jet black and is tide back and goes down to his waist. His face looks as 
though he has a permanent tan and the bones in his face are fairly pronounced.

He walks up to the entrance of the Dojo and pounds on the door. After a few 
minutes the fight he was hearing stops and a young girl around 16 answers the 
door "Hello can I help you sir?" she ask

He pulls out a small book reads and then says "Please take off all you 
clothes and show me the green cheese."
Akane screams and punches him in the face yelling "YOU PURVERT GET OUT YOU 
HENTAI, PERVERT, PERVERT, PERVERT."

Wide eyed with fear he looks at her <*huh?? Wait a minute that should have 
been where is Fuurikan high I think..*> He thinks before blacking out from 
hitting the wall on the other side of the street. 

Nabiki and Soun Tendo gather behind Akane attracted by Akane's screaming. 
"Now Akane what did I tell you about hitting people for little reason."

"Akane" Nabiki pipes in "you really should pay more attention to the details 
of a person."

"What are you talking about Nabiki didn't you here what that purv..." she 
stops as her foot hits a small English- Japanese dictionary. "Huh what's 
this?"

She quickly thumbs though it finding the phrase that he wanted said "Please 
take off all you clothes and show me the green cheese."<*Can you please show 
me the way to Fuurikan high school please? *> Peaking over her shoulder 
Nabiki says "Akane you heard daddy you shouldn't hit men in the face for no 
reason now how do you plan to keep the principle from finding out about this 
hmm?" Nabiki holds out here hand waiting expectantly for the money she knows 
is coming.

"OK Nabiki how much will it cost" Akane mutters as she digs out some money.

"1,000 yen should just about do it" she smiles happily thinking of a small 
investment she had in mind "Daddy" she says quickly facing her father "I 
think we should take this man into the guest room until he regains 
conciseness"

Soun stands there dumbfounded at what just happened "Yes Nabiki what evers 
best." He mutters not quite sure on what accrued.

Onna-Ranma walks out the door looks at the limp form on the ground and says 
to Akane "You know Akane a tomboy like you will never catch a man at this 
rate" he sticks his tong out at her before flying over two buildings yelling 
"Akane, what I do know!"  


Inside the house in the guestroom that Ranma and Genma are staying in.  The 
man from out side is lying on a futon.

The blackness slowly recedes (damn what the fuck just happened) he winces as 
a wave of pain spreads out from his back (damn I need to get up and move if 
this pain is going to go away) he thinks. Putting thoughts to words he sits 
up forcing a wet cloth off his face he then groans in pain <* 'id any one 
catch the listens plate on 'at truck? *> He groans before regretting the fact 
that he sat up and then promptly blacks out from pain in the back of his 
head. 

Nabiki looks up from where she was standing in the door way to the room and 
says "Hay every one I know who this guy is now" she quietly giggles from what 
she just learned. 

Kasumi looks up from her spot next to the man after reapplying the cloth to 
his forehead "Oh, Nabiki, what is this mans name and what was he doing at our 
front door?" she politely asks from here sitting position.

Nabiki waves a passport she had pulled from his pocket and says "You aren't 
going to believe this but his name is Joe Black" she suppresses a giggle "He 
is from Seattle in the America, and he is one of Fuurikan high's new combat 
instructors. From what I saw of his truck I'd say that he is definitely not a 
martial arts teacher."

"Oh my" Kasumi sighs.

Their heads turn as they here Joe Black groans from the futon that he was 
lying on. Kasumi places a hand on his for head to keep him from sitting up 
again. "Just lie and rest Mr. Black we have a doctor coming to take care of 
your injuries." Kasumi soothingly talks.

"Just tell me one thing please ma'am." He groans in deeply accented Japanese. 
"First of where am I, second where is Fuurikan High and finally who the <* 
Smeg *> hit me that punch was really sloppy."

A muffled yell is heard from the hallway. Nabiki shouts over here shoulder 
"Akane we don't need you getting mad again so why don't you and Ranma go on 
and help Doctor Tofu?"

A muffled conversation begins to take place out side the room. 

<*Great I've got no clue where I am, can't even speak Japanese and now I'm 
probably not going to get out of teaching that class here....  What the Smeg 
am I gonna do now? *> Joe sighs (great now for the three great questions 
where am I, what am I doing here, and how did I get here in the first 
place... wait make that four questions what city did my luggage end up in 
this time) he sighs again and then begins to such for his Eng. Jap. 
Dictionary. <* Great I knew I had it here somewhere. *>

"The poor man he can barely speak any Japanese." Kasumi sighs

Just then Genma pops in looks at the man lying on the futon and asks "Kasumi 
dear who is this man, and what is he doing here?"

"Oh um his name is Joe Black, he is from America, he is the school's new 
teacher, and he can't speak Japanese." Kasumi looks back and forth between 
the two men.

"Kasumi if he doesn't speak Japanese than what is he doing teaching a class 
in Japan?"

"I don't really know you would have to ask him but he doesn't really under 
stand us." Kasumi sighs shaking here head "Well I guess I should go fix some 
tea for our new guest." She quickly gets up and leaves.

Joe watches her leave and sighs. He takes a look at the new man who had 
entered the room and says "I sorry me should go imposing must leave and get 
to Fuurikan spy school. Bye." He gets up and makes to leave when Soun Tendo 
walks in.

"Now son" The elderly Tendo starts "let me put this plainly, I'm sorry my 
daughter hit you in the face and I was wondering if you were interested in 
staying for dinner to make amends."
 
"Umm Uhh sorry Mr. Tendo I really should be going.... Need to drop off the 
dummies and mats plus I gotta find an apartment Uuhhh bye now" Joe makes to 
leave again (great just what I need to get stuck at someone's house when I'm 
trying to get out of Japan. If I don't leave get that problem about me being 
a U.S. teacher taken care of I'll be stuck here for good for hell knows how 
long.) His train of thought is lost when Soun Tendo places his hand on his 
shoulder

"No Mr. Black I know you don't have an apartment so I insist on you staying 
here until the time that you find one." (Or until the time you get hitched 
with one of my daughters having another new martial artist in the family 
would really help carry on the heritage.) He thinks smugly to him self at the 
possibilities that arise from having another who's man just as dedicated in 
martial arts as Ranma is but much more polite just what he needs now... but 
which daughter should he get this young man engaged to?

--------------------------------

Joe sits in the middle of the Dojo at the Tendo residence. Its dark out and 
is around 1 a.m.  (Great just my horrid luck. Stuck at the Tendo's, I have a 
teaching job at a Japanese School, PLUS I think Mr. Tendo is trying as hard 
as he can to get me to marry one of his daughters....) <* WHAT THE SMEG AM I 
GOING TO DO NOW? *> Pulls out a double bladed sword and then in the time of 3 
seconds turned several dummies into nothing more than confetti. Shit he 
thinks to himself. He pauses sensing a person behind him. "Don't worry" he 
states over his shoulder "these are my own dummies." Sighing he sits down in 
frustration.

Akane stairs at what she just saw take place in front of her (Man this guy 
has to be a martial artist he just destroyed 8 dummies. Who the heck is this 
guy and where'd he get the sword?) "I'm uhh I'm sorry I hit you this morning 
I..."

"Don't worry about it, you should get some sleep you have to go to school 
tomorrow and besides I need some help setting up my classroom.... <*SMEG! *>" 
He yells realizing that he had just destroyed 8 dummies he was going to use 
in the classroom tomorrow.

"Ok, you're right... what type of martial artist are you anyway? I mean only 
a."

Joe holds up hand interrupting her shaking his head he states "First off I am 
no martial artist. Second what you just saw no one was ever supposed to see 
me do."

Akane thoroughly confused now shakes here head "What do you mean your not a 
martial artist I just saw you go through katas, and perform moves that only a 
very good martial artist can do." She gives him a weird look (man what's 
wrong with this guy. I'd like to see how he explains at how he's not a 
martial artist.) She gives him a hard stare waiting for an answer.

(Crap, Crap, Crap,) He thinks stair at her considering a way to get out of 
this for the time being. He looks down at his watch seeing that it's almost 2 
in the morning. (Damn jet lag I still can't get any sleep. Guess I should 
wake up here friend) "Kid, I'll explain on the way to Fuurikan Spy.. Sorry 
High, <*Damn I wish I wouldn't screw up so often.. Oh well *> You should wake 
up your friend what's his name? Oh ya Ranma. Well hurry up well be leaving in 
2 hours I'm going to need both your help to unload my truck and set up my 
class room."(Thank God that Kasumi girl helped me with my Japanese even if 
I'm still rough with it.) He turns to leave the dojo sheathing his sword.

Akane sighs as she watches the man leave grinning to her self as another evil 
way of waking Ranma appears in her head. (Well might as well do what he asks. 
Ranma should get up earlier any way. It just might help him get to school on 
time anyway. That baka has been getting more that enough sleep recently.) 

-------
    
Ranma hears some one call his name; he groans and rolls over trying to ignore 
the person. "RANMA, GET UP" he hears Akane yell at him. Groaning he mumbles 
"Ahh go away, Akane, its still dark ou..." <SPLASH>. Instantly Ranma wakes up 
sitting up he starts to yell "Akane, what the heck did you do that..." He 
stops mid sentence stairing at a man holding an empty pail that had just been 
dumped over his head. 

The man has his back toward Ranma and is exiting the room he looks over at 
Akane and states "Lady, I got your boyfriend awake I suggest you to hurry, 
your father is having me take you two to school sense I haven't been there 
before. My truck is parked out front, you foods on the table, and I don't 
care how early it is we have to leave now if were going to skip rush hour." 
He leaves without even taking a look at Ranma.

Ranma looks over at Akane and asks; "He didn't notice the change did he?" he 
looks at her hopefully.

"No, Ranma, he didn't notice the change. He just saw that I was having 
trouble waking you so he walked in dumped some water on you and left. So 
don't worry he doesn't know about the curse." She quickly leaves to eat the 
food in the dinning room.  

Ranma quickly gets up and begins to get dressed. (Man who the heck is that 
guy and what the heck is he doing here?) Ramna finishes getting dressed and 
leaves the room.  

------------

Joe is sitting in the cab of his truck waiting for Ranma and Akane to show up 
so they can show him how to get to school (Dam it all what the heck am I 
going to do. How the heck am I going to start my class, I'm not even supposed 
to be a teacher). Ranma and Akane exit the gait and climb into the truck they 
 quickly stow there backpacks at there feet. Akane looks over at Joe and 
suddenly states. "Ok Mr. Black you promised an explanation on how you know 
martial arts but your not a martial artist so spit it out."

Joe looks at the two realizing he isn't going to get out of an explanation. 
Sighing he starts the truck and begins to talk "OK you asked for an 
explanation and I'll give it to you but first tell me how to get to that 
school of yours." Akane quickly gives him directions as the pull away from 
the Tendo Dojo. "Right, now first of I am not a martial artist. Before you 
say a thing let me explain, Akane what you saw in the training hall was 
actually the western style of sword men ship. You see I am the European 
version of a martial artist. What I am is a weapons master. We have similar 
styles but when the two types of combat go up agents each other the 
differences become quite apparent." Seeing the confusion on their faces he 
decides to explain a bit further. "First of a weapons master can use anything 
around him as a weapon. And when I say anything around him I mean anything, 
jackets, tables, chairs, guns, and our fists if need be. A martial artist on 
the other hand specializes on a specific technique. For you and your family I 
believe it is hand to hand if I am not mistaken." 

"So what your saying" Ranma pipes in "is that you learned how to fight 
freestyle." Seeing him node his head Ranma continues "well if you learned how 
to fight free style then have much problem sparring with us then because we 
do free style combat here. I mean heck I my self study anything goes martial 
arts." He looks over at Joe Black waiting for a response from him but only 
sees him getting out of the truck.

"Where here." Joe calls over his shoulder. "Akane, Manma, you two grab some 
mats out from the bed my class room is 514." With out looking behind him he 
grabs a large amount of weapons from inside the bed of the truck. He quickly 
juggles them grabbing up the remaining 2 dummies left from the previous night.

Akane shrugs at Ranma and grabs several mats from inside the truck. Ranma on 
the other hand is stareng at Joe with a weird look on his face.  (This of all 
people is one of my new teachers.... I just can't believe it. He looks like 
he just got out of high school.)  Ranma looks around him self and notices 
that Akane is struggling with the mats in her hands (Oh well sigh might as 
well get the mats and help that tomboy Akane. 'can't believe that she tried 
to take all the mats.) He quickly runs up to Akane to help relieve her load.


Students are gathering outside Furiken high. Several notice the strange 
student siting under one of the trees near the entrance of the school. A yell 
is herd near the entrance of the building "DIE YOU EVIL SORCEIRE RANMA 
SOUTOME" Kuno runs across the campus of the school wielding a bokkun.

Ranma looks up just in time to see the young kendo martial artist go flying 
through the air. He looks over to where Kuno was standing to see the student 
who was under the tree had a sword drawn and his foot was in the air. 
"RANMA!" Joe yells "Would you please tell me the name of the student I just 
kicked was?"

"UH ITS KUNO!" Ranma yells back to Joe not quit sure of just what had 
happened. 

"Thanks, Ranma, I think I teach him some rules about wielding some swords why 
don't you get to class you'll be late" Joe turns back to Kuno who is just now 
getting up. (The two things I hate the most, sloppy swordsman ship and utter 
no sense of what not to do with a sword. And this Kid does both, the gall of 
him to charge a person with a weapon.  Who the fuck does he think he is any 
way?) 

Kuno shakes his head to clear it of the fog that was in his head. Now who had 
kicked him? It couldn't have been that cur Ranma he was still to far away. He 
looks at the student who had just talked to ranma with an evil eye "How Dare 
you kick KUNO The Blue Thunder in the back no one survives such a 
dishonorable act and lives" Kuno raises his bokkun and charges Joe. He 
strikes again and again but each blow is paired.

"Listen, 'id, if ya wanta be taught a lesion in safety then ya got the right 
person." Joe is talking in an even voice despite the fact that he has been 
pairing blow after blow from Kuno. Eyeing the opening in Kuno's defenses that 
has been getting wider and wider he finally decides to go on the offensive. 
He pairies a high blow while sliding to Kuno's back and does a round house 
kick to his back sending Kuno flying through the air.

Students have gathered around the fight. Leaving an area clear for the two 
combatents. Akane and Ranma are at the front of the group watching the fight 
take place. Akane has a worrid look on her face as she watches the fight. 
Ranma looks at her and asks "Akane what's wrong you worried about Joe or 
something?" Kuno jumps into the air striking at Joe only to be slapped on the 
back of the neck by the flat of Joe's sword.

Akane shakes her head while watching the fight take place. "No, Ranma, I'm 
not worried about Joe. Its actually Kuno I'm worried about this time, I think 
if Kuno gets Joe mad he may end up in many small pieces."

Ranma looks at her oddly before turning his attention back to the fight. He 
notices that Kuno has backed Joe up to a tree and makes a slash at Joe that 
would have cut him from shoulder to hip. Instead it just cut though the tree 
that Joe was now standing in. (SHIT THAT JUST WOOD HOW THE HELL CAN IT CUT 
THOUGH A SOLLED TREE LIKE!?!?) Joe is begging to wonder just how powerful 
Kuno was when he feels a hit at the side of his head. The hit from Kuno's 
bokkun sends Joe flying a few meters making him lose his concentration. A 
dark hooded form takes Joe's place momentarily before quickly dispersing. 
<*Ats it 'id. You have now asked for a thorough pounding. *> Joe quickly 
stands up but then promptly falls to his knees clutching his hand as if it 
were broken. He slowly eases a glove of his hand but stops quickly before 
tightening the glove around his hand. 

Kuno eyes Joe contemptuously. "SO dog are you admitting defeat now or would 
like to be taught another lesion by the great Tautywaki Kuno." He sees Joe 
remove his other glove and sigh noticeably.

He slowly raises his right hand that is still in its glove. <*Kuno, I will 
make this very clear, so you can under stand what I'm saying to you. You will 
lose, and you have done the very dangerous thing as to anger me. *> He raises 
his sword and there is a flash of movement and Kuno is lying in a crumpled 
heap on the ground with bruises covering most of his body. Joe looks down at 
the boy and says over his shoulder "Kill, Muno, that he has a class in room 
512 pice second permit." He turns and quickly enters the school building.

. "Well that's that I guess" Ranma watches as Nabiki drags Kuno over to the 
school building. "Akane, now would you please explain by what you meant by 
your last statement. I mean sure Joe just fought and won agents Kuno but I 
don't think Joe would actually kill Kuno."

Akane looks over at Ranma shaking her head, "Ranma, last night I found Joe in 
the dojo. He had a sword and was going through katas. After he had finished 
with those he proceeded to quite literally turn 8 dummies into nothing more 
than confetti. The scary thing is that he did it in under three seconds." She 
starts of toward the school building "Come on Ranma well be late."

------------

Room 512 9:00

Students start to enter the room chatting with each other not noticing the 
kid sitting in the back of the room. They start to look around the room in 
confusion on where their teacher is supposed to be at the moment. A few 
notice the kid as the one who pounded Kuno before school earlier and decide 
to see who he is. The room quiets as they start to hear a song go through the 
air.

<*When that I was and a little tiny boy, *>
<*  With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, *>
<*A foolish thing was but a toy, *>
<*  For the rain it raineth every day. *>

<*But when I cane to man's estate, *>
<*  With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, *>
<*'Giants knave and thief men shut their gate, *>
<*  For the rain it raineth every day. *>

<*But when I cam, alas! To wive, *>
<*  With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, *>
<*By swaggering could I never thrive, *>
<*  For the rain it raineth every day. *>

<*But when I came unto my bed, *>
<*  With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, *>
<*With toss-pots still had drunken head, *>
<*  For the rain it rainth every day. *>

<*A great while ago the world began, *>
<*  With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, *>
<*But that's all one, our play is done, *>
<*  And we'll strive to please you every day. *>

They gather around the boy in the corner of the room while he is busy 
singing. He looks like he's 18. He's has a long sleeved shirt tied around his 
waist and a sword leaning up agents him. A few start asking him minor 
questions like who he is, and if he's an exchange student. He just shrugs at 
each question and looks at the door to see if anyone is going to enter the 
room. He gets up and walks to the other side of the room and says over his 
shoulder as he pulls out some mats, "Come on guys lets set up the room before 
the teacher gets here." All he gets are confused looks. Sighing he continues, 
"Look, there are some padded swords in that closet over their get them out 
and we can start to spar with each other. Oh and guys will one of you mind 
helping me set the mats up?"

The students go about getting the room ready for light sparring. Some move 
mats out into the middle of the room, while others pull out padded swords and 
start fighting each other with them. The mats are quickly put into place and 
the room is filled with students fighting each other except for a few who are 
hanging around the person who got everyone going. "So will you please tell us 
who the heck you are already?" Asks one of the boys surrounding him. 

"Yeah" another pipes in another, "And how the heck did you beat Kuno earlier. 
I mean he's the best martial artist here other than Akane, and Ranma."

The boy there surrounding looks up and stares at them. He then begins to 
talk. "Well, my name is Joe Black. I beet Muno because he was being a real 
<*smegget*> with how he used his... what's right word for it."

"Bokkun." One of the boys supplies.

<*Danka*>"Bokkun. You see Lanma, and Akane are my host and I temporarily am 
staying with them." He looks at them. Seeing that they want more of an 
explanation he continues. "You see I work here, and I am also your new 
teacher."

The boys surrounding Joe let their jaws drop at this announcement.

"You, probably want an explanation for that one to right?" Seeing them node 
there affirmative he continues, "Well, what I'm going to say will probably 
shock you, but you see I'm your teacher."

Everyone in the room immediately facefalts at this announcement. "Wh.. Wha.. 
Your, a teacher?" one of the boys asked.

Joe only nodes his head

"Man, and we thought you where cool how old are you anyway. 30?"

Joe laughs at this question. "Actually I'm only 20. Me teaching here was big 
mistake" Joe sighs to himself. "You see, I didn't know this job was that of a 
teacher and it was in here in Japan. At first I thought I had an office job 
at Hawaii. Halfway though the flight I learned otherwise. <*Snafu *>. 

Fin

Snafu - Situation normal all fucked up


C&C is welcome, flames will be ignored. This is actually an update to part 1. 
I hope you enjoy, and im sorry i havent sent this story out for awile ive 
been a little busy with the acting troup im involved with.