<A large, dimly stage with a podium and microphone in the center is revealed. 
Mercutio walks out from the wings, across the stage, and stands before the 
mike.>

Mercutio: Spotlight, please.

<A spot illumines him.>

Mercutio: Thank you. <ahem> There comes, every once in a great while, a time 
when two mortal enemies (or one man and a myriad of people who intermittently 
served as the focus for his mortal enmityship) to show each other the mutual 
respect they deserve. I speak, of course, of the Tybalt-crews announcement:

Yup, we're retiring.

Mercutio: I suppose this means I won. Hunh. Somehow, I thought it'd be more 
satisfying.
  

 The use of the plural is not meant to imply royalty. :) The Tybalt persona
 has consisted of several people, usually working in shifts. Other times
 there's just been one. Several of our people are argumentative, and had to
 step aside when the thread to be banned was one they themselves had strong
 feelings on, or when the banning of a person they personally had issues
 with came up.

Mercutio: <nods sagely> Tybalt, or the persona thereof, must not have been an 
easy role to bear. That probably explains some of the more...... abrasive 
periods in their history.

I created Mercutio, my online persona-guy, in the early winter of 1997, in 
response to what I felt was Tybalt going far beyond what I believed were the 
acceptable limits of moderation. At the time, the list was both MUCH smaller 
and better-behaved than it is now, and I beleived that our despotic moderator 
was a menace, and thus became Mercutio in order to make his life a living 
hell, and maybe have some fun and build a name for myself in the process.

It didn't exactly work out that way. At best, I think I was a minor annoyance 
and source of amusement.
  

 I get to write this due to being the Tybalt-in-Chief, so to speak. I've
 been roundly sick of it for years, and so has everyone else who's held the
 job.

Mercutio: Given the pits of depraved spam that the list has sunk into over 
the years, which in some small part I may have been responisble for, one 
understands this.

Also, I'd like the various Tybalts who've threatened to beat me over the 
years (especially one depraved woman who STILL claims she wasn't Tybalt but I 
know you are, you perverted bundle of psychoses you ^_^) to know that I hold 
no grudges.

Well, maybe a few......

 A new system of moderation is about to be tried. More open, for one.
 You'll actually get to know exactly who's banning you. Perhaps it will
 work better. Perhaps it won't. Either way, it can't hurt to try, and some
 of the old Tybalt staff will be on board the new team. (Mostly the newer
 ones, who don't know any better. ;)

Mercutio: And I wasn't asked? ^_-  I'm shocked.
 

 And so, bid the Grumpy Tyrant goodbye. Much like his name, he was a fierce
 sort, full of snarls and threats... and played by an actor.

Mercutio: In a sense, that's what we're ALL doing.
  

 But watch it, or I'll be back.

Mercutio: <claps gleefully> Knowing these mooks, you na dI will be politly 
verbally sparring at each other again in no time. 

Anyway, old friend, old enemy, I would like to leave you with a few parting 
words, from the play (you know the one) of course. My namesake may have meant 
them in jest: I do not.


Mercutio: <ahem> "Why, what is Tybalt? More than Prince of Cats. O, he's the 
courageous captain of compliments. He fights as you sing prick-song, keeps 
time, distance, and proportion; he rests his minim rests, one two, and the 
third in your bosom: the very butcher of a silk button, a duellist, a 
duellist; a gentleman of the very first house, of the first and second cause."


Mercutio: <bows deeply> Thank you, and goodnight. 

<The spotlight winks off. Mercutio exits, stage left. Hlafway there, he 
pauses.>

Mercutio: One wonders....... what ones purpose will be now.

<Exeunt.>


-Mercutio
"A plague 'a both your houses!"
  
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