In a message dated 8/2/99 10:21:05 PM Central Daylight Time, 
vote1523@students.sou.edu writes:

how's this for a teaser?

Not bad, but you do need to work on the formatting of your piece.  And check 
the spelling.  (BTW, I'd like to see where you are planning on going with 
this story.)

Also, I like the lack of cliches in the opening.  If you are writing a 
canon-like piece, I'd avoid retelling the first few chapters of the manga (or 
anime).  Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt.

Otherwise, I'd like to see more.

James Holzhauer (aka Tobimaro [Ton-chan])