David Farr wrote:

Returning Home
By David Farr
Part 9

*****

        "GRAN'PAPA!"

        The keening wail shattered Soun's concentration. It had been the first time
since his wife's death that he had once again heard the siren call of the art.
Maybe it was the fact that Ranma and Akane were getting along that was making
him nostalgic, or the infective energy of their daughter, who was screaming her
head off in a very uncharacteristic fashion.

        Soun went from a kick to a run in a smooth motion. He slowed only to shove
open
the door, then charged across the lawn. Little Ukyo was curled about the shaft
of her spear on the floor, weeping into her arms.

        As Soun knelt down next to the little girl, Kasumi materialised next to him,
concern written on her face. "What's the matter?"

Kasumi can teleport.  Cool. 

        Soun glanced up at his daughter, then wrapped his arms about the crying child.
"Shuush, shuush, it's okay. It's okay."

        A tear streaked face turned up to gaze at him. "No, no it's not. HE'S here!"

        Worried and confused, Soun looked up at his daughter, to find Nodoka and
Genma,
just arrived from their own home, had joined her. They returned his gaze, none
of them appeared any the wiser.

Maybe they should all be looking at Genma?  

*****

        Nabiki glanced at her watch. The second hand still hadn't made its way around
the face since the last time she looked. Looking up she spotted the athletics
club jogging on the distant field, only they and a few of the other sports
clubs
were still at school. Oh, and Ranma, Akane and Ukyo. According to their
classmates they'd headed to the infirmary to look in on Tsubasa.

        Once again Nabiki glanced at her watch. Yep, there went another minute, wasted
waiting for the happy couple. Lifting her eyes she found four figures swinging
open the doors to the school building. They seemed to be talking animatedly
about something.

        "...you were actually becoming those objects," Ukyo was saying.

        Tsubasa nodded, looking kind of embarrassed, but then Nabiki would feel the
same wearing a dress like that. Wait a second, where'd he get a dress?

        "Ya gotta admit, the side-effects aren't worth it," Ranma added as they
came up
to stand next to Nabiki. "The whole revenge bit is really unhealthy."

        "Well, here we part ways," Ukyo said. "I've got to get to the restaurant, I'm
missing customers as we speak."

        Tsubasa smiled cutely. "Me too, I'm supposed to be home sick." He turned to
Ukyo, love shinning in his eyes. "But I'll be back, now that Ukyo is available
again." His words turned Ukyo into a cornered deer.

        "Well, be careful you two," Akane offered as they turned to run off.

        "And don't accept any gifts from strange little men!" Ranma called after them.

        "See you tomorrow, Ranma," Ukyo's voice floated back.

        Nabiki looked at the pair, an eyebrow raised. "You explained it to them, but
not me?"

        "We'll tell everyone when we get home, Nabiki." Akane gave her an unsettlingly
(it wasn't supposed to be, but it was) Kasumi like smile. "Just trying to keep

"Kasumi-like"

from having to tell that story over and over again."

        "Yeah, like the other one," Ranma added grimly.

        "Well then, let's get going." Nabiki started walking. Moments later Ranma fell
in next to her with Akane on his other side. "So, tell me about this new girl."

        "Blades?" Ranma inquired rhetorically. "We meet her a few years back, on a
world full of superheroes, you know, like in the comics. The events all started

Like in American comic books maybe, but that kind of superhero is pretty rare in
Japanese stuff.  

in a bank..."

*****

        Patience had always eluded Ranma, except in combat, where he could easily
outwait his foes. He rolled back on his heels and glanced at the clock. A
minute
and the line hadn't moved once, what kind of customer service did this bank
have?

Why are they in a bank?  If I was an extradimensional nomad, I wouldn't be 
making setting up bank accounts for myself.

        Next to him Akane chuckled and gripped little Ukyo-chan's hand a little
tighter. She was lucky, even this late in term, her pregnancy didn't show too
much. She just looked slightly overweight, although Ranma had learnt never to
tell her about that. "Relax, Ranma. It'll just take time." She smiled at him.
"You didn't have to come with me, I'd have understood, you do work all day."

        A shake of his head sent his pigtail whipping his shoulders. "Not with all
those wackos walking the streets." He paused for a few seconds. "I saw a few of
those superheroes fighting some robot the other day. The battle made our fights
back in Nerima look tame. They managed not to hurt anyone, surprisingly."

        "I always felt the same way back home," Akane added.

        It was only minutes (and about half a meter) later when they both sensed the
approaching danger. Both turned to watch as the automatic doors slid open,
letting a trio of costumed men into the bank.

        The leader was dressed in silver tinfoil, a large mask covering his face. A
backpack made of multicolored cylinders was strapped to his back, and numerous
tubes ran from the containers to some kind of launcher on his glove. Both
of his
henchmen were dressed similarly, but instead of pack, carried some kind of

"instead of a pack"

water
throwing gun.

        "Ladies, Gentlemen," the leader cried, gesturing grandly with his hands as he
spoke. "I am the Chemist, and unless you want to taste some of my wonderful
concoctions, I suggest you get down on the ground."

        Grumbling the people about Ranma, Akane and their daughter, started to lower
themselves down. Shrugging, Ranma offered his arm to his wife, so she could
slowly lower herself to the ground.

        Unfortunately one of the goons decided they weren't moving fast enough. Ranma
felt a blow to his back. It wasn't really anything to worry about, Azusa was
capable of heavier hits. Turning he found a rather surprised man holding a gun
the wrong way. Slitting his eyes Ranma hissed: "I was helping my pregnant wife
to the floor."

        The goon never knew what hit him. He just folded over Ranma's fist, then
slumped to the ground as young man vanished. Later, in jail, the crock would
spend a lot of time complaining that superheroes weren't allowed to dress like
normal people.

        Ranma's next target was the leader. Originally he'd just planned to go along
with crocks; there was no point in getting involved if it endangered others. It
had, however, become obvious that people would get hurt, no matter what he did.

        Unknown to the world travelling martial artist, the Chemist wasn't much of
villain. He was believed to be beneath the notice of most of the superheroes,
usually dealt to by some of the novices. A single one of Ranma's high speed

"dealt with"

chestnut fists knocked the robber down, out and across the floor. Turning Ranma
discovered that the last henchman had suffered a most humiliating defeat, taken
done by his one of his three-year-old daughter's spinning spear attacks.

        The bank doors slid open, revealing a girl in a black and green skater's
outfit
and mask holding two swords. She didn't really seem to be paying attention.
"Hey, Chemist, why don't you just give up?" she inquired. "We both know you
can't take me and I've got movie tickets for a few minutes... from... now?" She
tapered off as she noticed the condition of the not-so-supervillain. "Wow,
taken
down by civvies, this is a new low for you Chemie."

*****

        "Blades introduced herself to us, and was so impressed by the way I fought
that
she invited me to join her Hero group," Ranma continued. "It meant that we got

"hero"

some protection for Akane while she had Chibi-Ryoga, and it was easier than the
courier job I was running."

        Nabiki stared at Ranma, surprise evident on her face. "You got a job?"

        "How did you think we paid for food and lodging?" Ranma inquired.

        "With jewels and stuff you got from your adventures," Nabiki hazarded, then
paused. "I hadn't really thought about it to be honest."

        "We did have some of those," Akane interjected, "but we preferred to save them
for when we needed them. Most of the pieces are extremely beautiful, makes it
more likely they're worth something in other worlds."

        "Hmm... I think I know a few places we could get some good yen for those,"
Nabiki said thoughtfully, "if you want to sell them. So, what happened between
her and Akane. And don't say nothing, I'm a lot more perceptive than that."

        Akane giggled slightly. "We'd never suspect that from you."

        "Yeah, sis. We got many things to say about you, but blind ain't one of then,"
Ranma chimed in.

        "Keep going, Ranma, you might just dig yourself in really deep," Nabiki
growled.

        "You yourself noted how outgoing Blades is when it comes to her
relationships,"
Akane noted, changing the subject back. "After I had Ryoga she helped in out
with taking care of him. I was still a little self-conscious after the
pregnancy, you know how women get, and my jerk of a husband was really enjoying
playing hero. Blades was really friendly and I'm afraid to say we went a little
beyond friendship." She glanced guiltily at Ranma.

I'd think that Akane would be a little more reluctant to come out with this bit.
Giving Nabiki a handle on you that way is often a bad idea.    Wouldn't it be
enough to say that Blades was interested in her, without getting into details?

        "I forgave you long ago," he whispered back.

        Akane smiled weakly in reply. "It didn't go too far, just some heavy kissing,
and then I managed to tear myself away. Blades was understanding, she never
looks for a long term relationship because she keeps hoping between worlds.
After that we stayed apart more often, but every so often Blades would make
obvious passes at me in front of Ranma, so that the knucklehead would pay more
attention to me."

        "So why does she travel between worlds?" Nabiki inquired thoughtfully.

        "She's sworn to protect the two swords on her back," Akane answered, "and many
people want them. It is said that they were forged from an element formed
at the
very beginning of all time and space. They allow the wielder to alter reality
itself, including travel between the worlds, through time and to any point in
space. I'm sure you can see the uses of that power."

        Nabiki shivered. "Yes. And I never want that kind of power, I'd be too scared
of doing something terrible with it."

        "That's very mature of you Nabiki," Ranma said. "Few people would admit that."

        "Thanks, Ranma."

*****

        The Kuno mansion was not a place known for either its sanity or its
peacefulness. The few servants that worked on the estate had long since learnt
to avoid anything cooked by the young mistress, or thrown by the head of the
house. Unsurprisingly they few hairs on their heads, a very good medical
coverage and a very high resistance to toxins. It was even said that a few of
the ex-staff had gone on to less dangerous professions, like bomb-disposal or
posion-testing.

"poison-testing" or perhaps "poison-tasting"

        To the relief of the staff the two children had taken leave to go search for
their beloveds. Of course Tatewaki had recently returned, but so long as you
stayed out of the dojo and didn't touch his pictures, you were safe. They had
become worried when those same pictures had appeared, torn to shreads, in the
rubbish.

        Thankfully their young master had not gone ballistic as everyone had feared,
but remained calm and even contemplative. His time in the dojo seemed quieter
and at the end of each day there were fewer practice dummies to rebuild.

        Unfortunately the peace (broken only by the sound of hair-clippers) was not to
last.

        "OHOHOHOHOHOHO!" The laughter rolled across the house like a blizzard. Shivers
ran down the spines of the various staff-members and out the door (the shivers
that is, the staff couldn't leave without losing what were very high paying
jobs.)

        In the dojo the laughter broke Kuno out of his quiet contemplation of his
honor
and actions. He listened to the demented sound for a few seconds, before coming
to a decision.

        "Like him I may not, but I must warn him, if naught else but for the sake of

That sentence doesn't parse very well.  

Akane," he strode out of the underground training area and through the halls,
coming at last to his destination, the telephone.

        Them line rang for a few seconds, then a few seconds more, but Kuno waited
patiently. Finally the buzzing stopped and a voice spoke from the other side.

        "Hello, Tendo residence." The woman sounded flustered, a state Kuno knew this
member of the Tendo family was not often in.

        "Greetings to you, fair Kasumi Tendo," Kuno said grandly, "is thy sister Akane
or her husband about?"

        "No, I'm sorry, they have not yet returned from school, Mr Kuno." It was
obvious to Kuno that this girl, nay, woman, was intelligent indeed, to have
recognised him after he had forgotten to introduce himself.

        "Perhaps it is for the best that I do not speak with them directly. Please,
will you give them a missive of ill news from me. My sister has returned and
appears to be in a most jovial mood. I fear that she will attempt to disrupt
their wedded bliss, such that it is."

        "Oh! Oh dear," Kasumi gasped. "This could not have happened at a worse
time. Oh
dear. Thank you for this. Good bye." The rude beeping told Kuno that the Kasumi
had immediately hung up.

        "All does not go well at the Tendo household I fear. Maybe I should go to
their
aid." Kuno mused.

        "I think not, brother dear."

*****

        Life was not fair. She had taken everything! EVERYTHING! And what was
left? Not
even family.

        How could a girl so full of anger and unrestrained strength possibly
compare to
a highly trained and devoted woman like Shampoo? It was something the Amazon
simply couldn't understand, especially when Akane had proven what everyone had
believed about her with that girl that carried the two swords.

        And what would a girl that way inclined want with a man as handsome as Ranma.
Was it the curse? Had Akane fallen so deep in lust with red-haired girl
that she
was willing to have children by the male half? That must have been it, and poor
Ranma, the easily fooled male that he was, could see this. Yes, that had to be
it!

        Crouching amongst the vents and chimneys of Nerima's restaurant district,
Shampoo came to that conclusion for the hundredth time. She didn't realise how
insane her reasoning sounded or how much she would have shuddered at it before.

        The giggling of a happy girl interrupted her thoughts, and then a voice that
sounded much too familiar. "Watch it, you don't want to drop him, do you?"

        Angry at having her solitude interrupted, Shampoo stood and glared over
the box
she had been leaning against. The blood ran from her face as she set her
eyes on
the couple happily leaping from roof to roof. She fell back into her hiding
place.

        "Shampoo no see that. Shampoo no see that," the girl repeated breathlessly,
then to confirm what she had told herself, she peeked back up over the edge of
the box. "Shampoo see that."

        Not far away another pair of eyes, that had been busy studying its pray, fixed
first upon the hidden girl, then upon the older couple not far away. "As if
their life isn't complicated enough," Blades murmured, watching as Shampoo kept
taking glances at the couple, "this has to happen."

        Down below Shampoo came to a decision. "Shampoo no understand. Grandmother
will
know. Shampoo ask her, even if she try stop Shampoo get Ranma."

        Shampoo scampered off, unnoticed by the couple and their child, as Blades came
to a difficult decision. As much as she wanted to pursue her love interest,
there were people who had to know of this latest development. Before things
really got out of hand.

*****

        The young man sighed as he stared at the sign. "Wrong again."

        "I wonder who the Tendos are?" His companioned asked, glancing around. To

"companion" "Too"

often, questions like that got answer in the worst possible way.

"answered"

        The young man paused to think for a moment. "I think I remember something.
Wasn't sis' original name Tendo?"