On Tue, 20 Jul 1999, Michael Ricketts wrote:

Hey Jason,

Thanks for taking the time to reply...

Sure!

The sky grew dark, greying out the land as the two opponents faced
each other across the field of battle. The field in question was
the outer grounds of Furinkan High and the combatants were two that
would take on somewhat of a legendary status in the decades to
follow.

Outer grounds?  You mean the school's -that- big?  Or did you just mean to
say outside.

I meant outer grounds in that they're out of doors but inside the grounds of
the school... *shrugs* If I really wanted to be picky, I could say that they
are in the outer grounds, as they're fighting just inside the gate (as opposed
to a doorway to the main hallway)...

I see your reasoning.  It's not really a major point, but I'm usually
picky about connotations...

     Twisting to one side Ranma allowed the bokken to pass down one
side of his body, missing him by a few inches; an eternity.

Eternity is time related.

Good point... *sighs* But, for some reason,  "an infinite distance." Just
doesn't cut it as a replacement... I could put "a few miles", but I don't like
that either... Any suggestions? (Open floor question...)

How about 'not even remotely close'?

     Akane started forward, wondering what was wrong. Even if he
was a jerk, it was a martial artist's duty to help the wounded or
weak. Ranma definitely qualified.

Qualified as weak?  The way the sentences are put together, that's what it
sounds like.

Well, Akane seems to consider Ranma emotionally "weak and pathetic" (or at
least stunted :) so I just went with it... (she says it in the Hiryu Shouten
Ha story line)

How about 'Ranma definitely qualified as weak, if only emotionally'.

<sniped accidentally>

Write better?  What?  Oh no, when I said I was bored, I meant that I was
starting to think of silly things, not that your story was boring.

with envy, Ranko tried to ham it up.
     Yuka failed to avert her gaze in time.

Heh.

Anything goes martial arts - Kawaii-fu... :)

(As so many people have said and written about before)

Ah...though the only place I've seen it actually used in a fanfic is
NETTG, and Ranma never actually underwent the Kawaii-ken training there.

     Shaking her head slightly, the nurse was about to reply that
she'd tell the location for the reason of the kick,

Ranko would tell the location for the reason...wha?

Ok, that is a little awkward... Utsuki was going to tell Ranko the location of
the nurse's station, if Ranko told Utsuki why she kicked the door in. But then
Akane tells Ranko anyway... I'll change it a little...

How about '...the nurse was about to reply that she would tell the
location if Ranko would devulge the reason for the kick...'

     "Nay! The foul sorcerer must have thrown his shoe at me! Tis
the only explanation!"

But how would a defeat by any other name make more or less of an impact on
his face?  Unless he thinks that throwing shoes in unmanly, or something?

Well, Kunou has a problem with admitting that things aren't quite the way he
sees them... If he's decided - for whatever delusional reason - that Ranma
didn't kick him, then he's not going to change his opinion...

Okay.  Why would he deny that, since he's still acknowledging his loss?

This was written because it's what I thought he'd do and also because I needed
something to break up the Akane, Sayuri and Yuka scenes (between when they
leave the nurse's station and when they get to the classroom)

Well, it was funny, so don't worry.

     The tourist laughed. "[Old boy, you're a little lost if you're
looking for Japan]" He pointed to the north, laughing as he did so.
"[It's few thousand miles that way.]"

Er, if they're in America, than north is certainly in the wrong direction.

Nope, they're in the middle of Australia... :) Uluru is the name of the huge
rock that's in the middle of the continent... Used to be known as Ayres Rock
-- Until the Aboriginal name for it became acknowledged. Maybe I should make
mention of this in the author's notes?

Ah.  I must have misread that.  I thought you had said something about
Ryouga being in America, but then again, I've been reading things too
quickly of late.

Nabiki wrote carefully in her workbook, following the teacher's
well formed script across the board.

Er...script?  In Japanese?

Hmmm... Script works for me... I could replace it with "kanji" I suppose...
*shrugs*

I think that would work better.

     Ranko's ankle was whole and unblemished, with not a single
thing remaining to show of the wound that had marred it earlier
that morning.

While I know you didn't intend it this way, it would be funny if Kuno's
work -did- have a healing effect.

You'd never hear the end of it... :)

Yep, Kuno's really Sailor Saturn.  Or at least, part of Team Gatchman. 
^_^

-Natsume Ranma Ranma
-------
The sardines weren't worth the trouble.  A few more shots, then 
Ryoga-san would overheat and explode.  Ducking around a corner, 
I managed to lose him as I entered the ramshackle residence of 
my Anime supplier.

One look at his face and I knew that I was betrayed.  "Tell me."
I insisted.  He refused, so I slammed him against the wall.
"Last chance.  Where can Ranma-Ranma find good fanfics?"
"Try Jason Liao." he whispered, before he slumped to the floor.
I heard the sounds of a door splintering as I left through the 
window, one step ahead of Tendo Heavy Industries...