On Fri, 16 Jul 1999, Ken Wolfe wrote:

both knew it, you could see it in their eyes. If Ezekiel Stone
was in the habit of biting his nails, his fingers would have

	Tense mis-match.  "If Ezekiel Stone had been in the habit ..."

Stone took a deep breath and sighed. "I've really got to stop
letting him get to me like this," he said to himself with not
too much bitterness. Hopelessness. That was what the bastard was

himself without too

"Japanese Sword. The secretary said a case for the Consul's

sword.

"'Kay, let's see what comes up. Hmmm... got some hits, must have
spelled it right. I'll look at the first one. Here we go, Oda
Nobunaga... 1534 to 1582. Was the first of the three unifiers of
Japan at the end of the Warring States period, was of middling
status in the feudal hierarchy, yadda yadda.... ooh, came to
control a third of Japan before he got offed by a retainer.

	Actually, it's thought he committed suicide to avoid being captured.
He may have ordered a retainer to be his second, but I don't know the
details.  On the other hand, considering the palace he was in was on fire at
the time ...

Don't it always turn out that way? Lesse... bunch of details
about the wars he was in... built some bigass castle...
converted to Christianity-"

	... don't think so.  He encouraged Christian missionaries in order
to balance the influence of the Buddhist temples, but he also persecuted
them quite bloodily at times.

She smiled. It looked like she understood the reference. "It's
no concern of mine," she said, her voice regaining its previous
soft silkiness. "Just remember, the Shinma are my prey." She
turned around and walked away.

Suggest: /my/ prey

Miyu answered immediately, as if this were something she had
already given much thought to. "The paths to the spirit realms

	Extraneous "to".

must surely see that the days when Japan could be conquered by a
swordsman are long past."

	Tell that to Mishima ...

"I'm Amano Yuri, Miyu's guardian."

	<flat stare>

Miyu smiled cheerfully to them. "Konbanwa Eiko, Mayumi." She
then said more in Japanese that included something that sounded
like "Izikyuru Sutounu." It sounded like an introduction. The
two girls smiled shyly and bowed to Stone. "Haro," they said in
unison.

	If it's proncounced the way I think Ezekiel is pronounced, Izikieru
would probably be a closer romanization.

"Thanks." Ezekiel frowned. "Miyu, aren't you cold without your
uniform?" Her eyes went wide, then darted down to examine
herself. Then she looked back at him, a hint of a blush on her
cheeks. "Ezekiel-san..."

	Should be a new para in there.


	Nice work!

Chris Davies.