Just a little idea I'm playing around with in an attempt to deal with 
writers block on my big My big project.

< > indicates that Japanese is being spoken (except when it's aramaic) " " 
indicates that latin is being spoken.

As always all the characters used belong to Rumiko Takahashi (except the 
ones that don't.)

So without further ado, Montanto Productions proudly presents

                                            SUBURA
                               an idea for a Ranma Fanfic
                                        By Bill Morse
Many a neighbor shook their heads, in exasperation, as a loud wailing came 
from number five on the third floor. It was the fourth time this week and it 
was only Tuesday.

<Don't tell me Nabiki got in trouble with the Crossroad College again.> 
Mathias the Scribe, who lived directly above on the fourth floor, muttered.

His wife perked her ears, carefully scrutinizing the noise for a moment <No, 
this is a new one,> she said puzzled. <Almost happy. I will have to ask 
Kasumi later on.>

None of the tenants were surprised by these outbursts, but year in year out 
the constant emotional discomforts of Soun Tendou had been a constant source 
of irritation for everyone living in the insula. There had been one incident 
several years ago when the landlady, a respected member of the Patrician 
family Aureleus Caepeo, who had recently bought the building, had told him 
that he either get a grip or receive his notice of eviction. Fortunately his 
oldest daughter had been able to plead on his behalf. Most of the tenants 
had been glad of this. As much as they would be glad to be rid of their 
emotional neighbor, everyone liked Kasumi and would not wish to see her go.

Soun Tendou was a mystery to the residents of the insula. He had arrived, 
with his wife and three daughters, in the subura nearly 15 years ago. He 
wore his hair long like a Gaul, complete with a bushy mustache but he did 
not look like any barbarian anyone had ever seen.  He wore a strange tunic 
that he called a Gi, and spoke no Latin. His wife, Kimiko, spoke 
competently, but her accent was so strong it was next to useless. Oddly 
enough, she could write extremely well and, for a little while, made a 
fairly good living writing letters for her illiterate neighbors. It was 
almost as if she had been taught to read and write but never to speak.

Soun had learned Latin quickly enough but he never became proficient. Even 
when he was able to communicate the neighbors still didn't know what to make 
of him. He claimed that he and his family where from a land that he called 
Nihon. A place that nobody in Rome had ever heard about. They laughed it all 
off as a fantasy when he started to tell stories of giant metal birds and 
the boxes that held moving pictures inside. He also had the strange habit of 
putting dried crushed leaves in a tiny little cup attached to a small pipe, 
set them on fire and inhale the smoke. This almost always made him sick. 
Both his wife and children had asked him to accept the fact that there was 
no (what did they call it?) Tobaku in Rome.  And just give up.

But despite the eccentricities they were good neighbors. Kimiko Tendou was 
long missed having died several years after the family had moved into the 
subura. Soun had managed to make a living by being the best fighters anyone 
had ever seen. There were stories about how he had defeated five ex 
gladiators armed with swords, unarmed and alone. Since then, he was in high 
demand as a bodyguard. He even had started to teach his magical technique to 
anyone willing to pay.

Soun rushed out of the door, laughing. "Kasumi!" He called in his rough 
Latin. He passed the landlady who had been talking to one of the tenants on 
the second floor. "Ah. Milady." He said, bowing. "Have you seen my 
daughters? I have something important to tell them."

"Good morning, Soun Tendou." The Landlady said with a smile. "Kasumi is 
babysitting my youngest. I must say, she is fantastic with children. She 
will make a fine Mother some day."

Kasumi was indeed there playing with young Gaius. At five years old Gaius 
was a sweet child, but frighteningly precocious. Kasumi was probably one of 
the only adults he did not run ragged. She turned to see her father standing 
in front of her.

"Kasumi? You have to take young lord home and find your sisters. Need every 
one upstairs for family meeting."

Kasumi smiled. "Of course Pater," she said. "Come along Gai-chan I think 
Milady should be home by now.

			* * * * * * * * *

"An engagement? Pater, this is so sudden." Kasumi said, sounding very 
excited.

"Is it with Strachus Lepus's son?" Nabiki asked. "It's a well off family and 
the boy is actually cute!"

"I hear Tulius Decimus is available," Akane chipped in.

"Oh no, don't you remember? He married the daughter of Porcelus the 
butcher." Kasumi pointed out.

"Oh yes, what a shame. What about Marcus Lycus, Tata? He's going bald, but 
Kasumi likes older men." Nabiki said with a grin

"Nabiki!" Kasumi gasped, looking quite shocked.

Soun laughed. "No, no, will be engaged to son of good friend of mine. His 
name Ranma Saotome. He and father have been traveling and studying for many 
year. If you marry Ranma. You will unite our two schools and preserve our 
heritage."

"Married to a complete unknown? Tata, what's the advantage of that? Akane 
asked, shocked.

"Pater. I don't understand. How can you preserve a heritage you said won't 
come into being for another six hundred years?" Kasumi asked puzzled. The 
other daughters nodded in agreement.

"Traveling all of that time. They're probably broke." Nabiki muttered. "I 
trust he's at least good looking, Tata?"

"Well actually I not know. I never see him before."  Soun confessed.

"Tata!" Akane gasped.

"We're doomed." Nabiki groaned.

"Please, children. It matter of Giri." Soun pleaded.

"Giri?" Akane asked, looking very puzzled, as she always did whenever her 
father fell back into the mother tongue.

"Dignitas." Nabiki whispered into her ear. Akane nodded in understanding.

"Anyway do it because Paterfamilias demand it." Soun said, trying to 
reassert his authority. "Genma's letter is dated a month ago from Pontus. So 
they may be in city now." Soun said trying to sound stern and wise. The 
effect was ruined when the noise of screaming came from the lower floors.

"A monster! Run!" Some one shouted.

"Its huge! Do something!" Someone else cried.

<Put me down ya old fool! You're scaring everybody> a girl shouted in 
Nihongo.

"What that?" Soun gasped. "That not Latin! It them! <Saotome! My old friend! 
up here! It's good to see you! > He shouted, running for the door. Nabiki 
followed him.

"What's Tata saying?" Akane whispered to Kasumi.

"I'm not entirely sure. But I think Pater's friend has arrived." Said Kasumi 
who was the only daughter who knew more then 10 words of Nihongo.

Soun and Nabiki rushed back into the house followed by a large black and 
white bear carrying a struggling bundle. Soun was probably the only person 
alive who knew it was a giant panda. Before anyone had a chance to bar the 
door the panda had forced its way inside.

"Pater. Is this your friend?" Kasumi asked.

Soun shook his head franticly.

"Oh of course. Large, black and white bears show up all of the time. Rome's 
crawling with them. Really Tata you should know these things." Nabiki 
drawled.

The Panda stopped and put down the struggling object. It was a girl, with 
long red hair tied in a pigtail, and dressed in an ill fitting red tunic and 
black leggings.  "Er I Ranma Saotome. I much sorry about this." She said.

"You are welcome into our house, er, ah, Sir?" Kasumi said looking at the 
small red head puzzled.

Nabiki looked at Ranma closely. "Tata, dignitas and the joining of families 
aside I don't think I can go along with this marriage. I mean, look closely 
for heaven's sake. Ranma's a girl." Soun found this to be a good time to 
faint.

			* * * * * * * * *

The landlady rapped on the door very hard. Soun Tendou answered quickly. 
"Ah, Milady. Is good to see you on fine day. Can I offer you wine? I 
celebrate return of good, old, friend, Genma Saotome." A large man dressed 
in a white tunic, with a napkin over his head, and wearing what looked like 
glass lenses over his eyes stood up and bowed to her.

"I'm pleased to know you, Genma Saotome." The landlady said, smiling. "Are 
you from the land of Nihon as well?" She asked looking him over.

"Yes, yes, that correct, Milady." Genma said hesitantly. His Latin was even 
worse then his friend's.

"How interesting. And her I thought, my good friend, Soun Tendou and his 
daughters were the only ones. That is curious. No, I'm sorry but I don't 
have time for a drink. I have to follow up on a complaint. Several of the 
other tenants claimed they saw a large black and white bear walking up the 
stairs carrying a screaming red haired girl. Have you ever heard of such a 
thing?"

Soun put his hand behind his head and laughed nervously. "Ah no Milady. I 
sure if I see Panda I would remember." His friend laughed looking a bit 
embarrassed.

The eyes of the landlady narrowed. "A Panda? Soun Tendou, what on earth is a 
Panda?"

Soun laughed again. "Oh so sorry, Milady. It word for Black and white bear 
in my language. They very common in Nihon."

"Just like giant metal birds and horseless carts, Soun Tendou?" The landlady 
said with a slight smile.

"Ah, yes, exactly Milady. Soun said slightly embarrassed.

"I see," she said, deciding that there was nowhere in the Tendou's apartment 
that a large bear could hide. She turned to leave but a thought occurred to 
her. She returned her gaze to her tenant. "Oh, Soun Tendou, I almost forgot 
to ask. Who was the girl walking down the stairs with your daughters? You 
know, the one with the red hair?"

"Oh," Soun said laughing, "that Saotome's daughter ah�."

"Ranko." Genma cut in for his friend. "She, and brother Ranma, travel with 
me for many year. It easy to tell if you downwind. Akane and Kasumi thought 
it good if she go with them to public bath."

"I see." The Landlady said wrinkling her nose. "I suggest you follow their 
advice as well. Welcome to Rome, Genma Saotome." She said and turned and 
left before either of the men could thank her.

Soun gasped a sigh of relief as she left. <I suggest you try not to be a 
panda as much as possible Saotome-San> He said.

Genma shrugged. "It is easier said then done. Tendou-San, it is the nature 
of the curse to remain constantly active. I once was caught in the rain in 
the middle of the desert. But both Ranma and I will try. It is no more 
convenient for us you know."

Soun nodded. He sipped his wine and winced. <This is terrible. Oh how I miss 
Sake.> he suddenly looked at his friend. <So, you've been searching for 13 
years there's no hope is there?>

Genma shook his head. <I wouldn't say that, Tendou. It's just that it's an 
incredible long shot. It took me ten years to find it but I believe it will 
work.>

<What in the world are you talking about Saotome? I had thought that all was 
necessary in activating the Nanban mirror were tears. What's the danger in 
that?>

Genma shook his head sadly. <I know we believed that it was the Nanban 
mirror, that the master used on us all of those years ago. But knowing that 
is of no help at all. When I traveled east with Ranma that was the first 
thing that I searched for. But I could not find anything, not even legends 
or rumors. I'm afraid it will be some time before the mirror is even 
created.>

<I see. But if we are unable to use the Nanban mirror, what did you have in 
mind to get us back Saotome?>

<Please let me finish Tendou. After I discovered that the Nanban mirror was 
not an option. I traveled through out China. Studying all forms of magic. As 
you can see by my cursed form, the price of  knowledge was often very 
costly.>

<Yes, yes I see. The sacrifices that you made for us, Saotome.>

<Of course finally after many years we finally heard of an incredible 
artifact, the Scripture without Words. It was frequently said that by 
activating this relic one can actually see the future. After many ordeals I 
finally found it and through it gained the solution to our problem. Ranma 
and I raced back to tell you. It took us a year to get back but I do believe 
that we have made it in time. The preparations will be slow and tedious and 
even if we do get everything correctly the risk will be incredible. But at 
last there is hope Tendou!>

<That is wonderful Saotome!> Soun said weeping. <You do not know the torture 
of living here it is barbaric! There are times when I wish that I had come 
with you. But I had the girls and Kimiko to take care of it wouldn't have 
worked. But every  now and then I wonder if we were home, with modern 
medicine, Kimiko would have been saved.> At this he broke down completely.

Genma grabbed his friend by the shoulders. <Get a hold of yourself Tendou! 
You don't know that! At least you were able to bury your wife. Mine won't be 
born for another 2000 years.>

Before Tendou could say anything more there was a loud commotion coming from 
outside in the hallway it was almost as if someone was being dragged up the 
staircase. Akane and Nabiki came in dragging handsome young man dressed in 
Ranma's clothes by the ear. Would anyone like to explain this? Akane 
demanded throwing the man down on the floor.

The man got up again rubbing his ear. "Er I Ranma Saotome. Sorry about 
this."


Well Hope you tolerated it. a few notes.

Insula: literally means Island. It's an apartment house.

Subura: Rome's answer to the Bowery. Poor and densely populated              
Quite the polyglot containing Jews, Gauls, Syrians and one               
temporally dislocated family from the 20th century.

Pater: Father

Tata: Diminutive of Pater "Daddy"

Paterfamilias Absolute head of the household.

Dignitas: Honor, image, personal clout, Machismo. It probably is not         
       the best way to explain Giri but to someone who only speaks           
      Latin and hardly any Japanese it comes close.

Well I know this has a long way to go and I probably sent it out way to 
early. I have few more directions I plan to take this. I'm still doing the 
research. The sticking point have is selecting exactly when the story takes 
place because obviously anything going on at the time will effect the 
actions of the characters. In this short draft I have it taking place in 95 
BC the reason for this is that I enjoy the joke of Kasumi babysitting young 
"Gai-Chan" who is five years old at the time. Any later then this and 
"Gai-Chan" will not be anywhere near as cute, to put it mildly.

The big problem with this selection is that with the exception the passing 
of a Law that removed all Italians from Rome (at the time there was a 
difference) That started fuelling tensions that led to the Social War 4 
years later and a reference to Sulla importing some Lions for a Circus, I 
haven't found any references to anything happening in 95 BC. Of course a 
lull could be to the advantage for the Wrecking crew to do their thing 
without interruptions. However half the fun of having them in the period is 
to have them properly buffeted by the waves of History.  It's easy enough to 
drop the Gai-Chan joke and move the starting point to another year but at 
the same time its tough to part with your favorite scenes.

On other parts. Yes I know making Ma Tendou a Classical Scholar was a cop 
out. I just needed a way for the Tendous to adjust more easily.

On how to use the other characters. I plan  to come up with first century 
equivalents for most of them. Its easy to see Kunou as a stuck up minor 
Patrician who has just finished his mandatory term in the army and is just 
starting out his career in the Senate.

I had a thought of using a contemporary Ryouga(1990s) accidentally going 
through a time vortex and of course everyone wants to know how he did it. 
(Ryouga doesn't have a clue.) The problem is that since he's never even met 
Ranma he would lack most of his drive.

No thoughts on Ukyou

And as for our favorite amazon. . . . . .

The wall of the Bathhouse exploded leaving a gaping hole. A girl with long 
purple hair, dressed in silk, and carrying two metal clubs walked through 
the dust. "Ranma!" she shouted, pointing one of her clubs at Ranma and 
Akane. "You I kill!!"

Onna-Ranma blanched in terror. "C..Ca....Cologne!!" She stammered.

As always  C&C and suggestions are welcome and appreciated. Thanks a lot.
                                                    Bill Morse






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