First, sorry it took me a couple more days to get this out. I
didn't have this one finished when I started posting this series, and I
had planned on posting this chapter right after chapter three. So much
for the plan. Anyway, this chapter is like fine grit sandpaper. Rough,
but I have edited it, so it's not TOO rough.
Ah'ight, lets get it on! Oh yeah, characters ain't mine, Ranma and co
are property of Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan Inc. and other people.
Perfume and Altered Destinies are Wade Tritschler's. You can sue, but
you got all my money anyway.
Yeah, first fanfic. Be gruesome, I mean gentle.
"speech"
(thoughts)
*sound effects*
<panda signs>
{other languages}
-chan and -kun used to indicate what sex the person is at the time.
Two halves make one?
or
Why is this such a weird school?
Nabiki pulled her pillow tighter over her head, muttered vague dire
threats, and, still asleep, ran the figures for full soundproofing of
her room through her head. Fortunately for all concerned, the noise
level quickly dropped to tolerable levels. The beast stirred, but did
not wake.
Later that morning, at breakfast, Akane sat quietly. Ranma had been
forced to run down the road to get hot water in order to calm her down,
so both were in their normal bodies. Ranma sported a large bruise on
the side of his face, which everyone studiously ignored. Kasumi had a
surprised expression permanently fixed on her face, which was also
ignored as best as possible. Genma was still stuck in panda form, and
was also stuck in the ground headfirst. Soun was getting quietly drunk
as they all sat around the table.
Nabiki was the last to join the group, bleary eyed as usual. She sat
down at the table and started eating a very large portion of food.
After a while of single minded chewing, she finally felt more like a
human. She looked up.
"What was with the racket this morning? And why is Kasumi in shock?"
Nabiki failed to ask about Genma, already being able to think of a dozen
reasons to pound him.
Akane blushed bright red and mumbled something.
"What?"
"Mmmblemphmmd," she repeated.
Nabiki raised an eyebrow in irritation. "Speak up a bit, I swear,
you're as bad as Ranma."
Uh oh.
Akane glowed a bright blue and managed to use her father's own demon
head trick. "NO I AM NOT AS BAD AS RANMA!" she screamed as Nabiki fell
over backwards and scooted in fear against the wall.
Akane's head returned to normal. "Alright?"
She gulped and nodded nervously.
"Well, then, as long as that's settled."
Kasumi walked into the wall, muttered a vague excuse me, and proceeded
to bow to the kitchen. Soun took another long drink of sake. Ranma
helped himself to Genma's portion.
Nabiki eased herself back to the table and sat back down. She started
to take a bite, then stopped. "So, what was the problem?" Kasumi
walked into the wall again and Soun took another drink.
Ranma leaned over and whispered into her ear. Nabiki blushed slightly
and opened her mouth. Correctly divining her intention, Ranma shook
his head franticly and pointed at his bruise. Nabiki decided
discretion was the better part of valor and shut her mouth again, but
she had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing.
The three of them got ready for school. Nabiki was the first to leave,
and Akane and Ranma were not too far behind her.
About halfway there Akane remembered her task. "Oh crap, Ranma! We
were supposed to take care of Nabiki today!"
Ranma paled and nodded. "Oh yeah, we better get moving!"
They both raced down the road and quickly took to the rooftops to avoid
people. They arrived at the school to find Nabiki standing in the
middle of a smaller crowd of people who were being held at bay by a boy
dressed in the school uniform but wielding a set of short sticks in a
blurring pattern. He was slightly taller than Ranma, maybe a year or
two older, and about the same build. He had short black hair that was
perfectly groomed, and a delighted grin on his face as he struck student
after student across the forehead.
Neither Ranma nor Akane paused to consider this as they launched
themselves into the remaining students and proceeded to slam them into
the ground. Nabiki stopped them before they repeated the process on her
erstwhile protector.
"Who..." Ranma had time to say before they heard the thunder.
Akane stepped forward and cut him off with a wave. "You here to fight
Nabiki right?"
Kuno nodded.
"Sorry, I'm her stand in today." *POW*
Kuno crumpled, unconscious.
She turned back to Nabiki. "Sorry Sis, forgot. Who's this?"
"I don't know, but thanks to all of you," she replied.
"No problem, it was fun. I'm Uragi Ikari."
"I'm Ranma Saotome, and this is Akane Tendo."
"And I'm Nabiki Tendo."
"Really? Nabiki Tendo? As in the Champion of the Nerima district of
the Street Fighting arena?" Uragi asked.
Nabiki blinked. "You've heard of me?"
He smiled. "Well, yeah. I'm in the weapons division in Kyoto, or I
was anyway. I just moved here."
"Uragi, Uragi," Nabiki murmured to herself, "No, I can't say I've heard
of you. Sorry."
He grimaced. "No surprise there, it's not like I'm a district champ.
Ready for your upcoming battle this weekend?"
This time Nabiki grimaced. "No, not now." Her expression hardened.
"But I will be."
Ranma interrupted, "Listen, we gotta get to class. I suggest you do
the same." He dragged Akane off.
Uragi watched them go, then turned back to Nabiki. "I haven't
registered yet, so... could you direct me to the office?"
She smiled slightly. "Sure, for a price. 500 yen please."
He looked at her, startled. Then he smiled thoughtfully. "How about I
carry you to get something to eat after school?"
Nabiki paused. "Well... okay, but you would have come out cheaper just
paying me."
He shrugged. "Whatever."
Nabiki guided him off to the office, leaving Kuno groaning slightly on
the ground.
****************
Class was uneventful that morning; the only thing worthy of note was
when the sensei nearly put an eye out popping the cork on a bottle of
sake. It even caused Ranma to shift position in his sleep. Akane was
far to deeply asleep to notice. She hadn't slept very well the night
before.
Lunch arrived finally, and the class swarmed the yard to eat, talk,
relax, gamble, and do all sorts of school type things. Nabiki was busy
showing Uragi around, who had managed to arrange a tour for a jump in
the quality of restaurant later on. Ranma was immediately set upon by a
large mob of males, who wanted to know how he got engaged to someone as
hot as Akane and if he had done the nudge nudge wink wink with her yet.
"Ah hmm," said a voice from directly behind them.
They turned around to see a VERY annoyed Akane holding a bento and
glaring at them. Ranma just looked confused.
"And just why would you think that?" she asked the surrounding boys.
"Oh, no reason, eh heh heh," one of the boys replied nervously with his
hand behind his head. The rest laughed as well and quickly thinned out.
Ranma motioned for Akane to follow him, and they walked over to sit in
the grass close to a tree. A couple of boys followed.
"Hi," one of them said. "My name is Daisuke, and this is Hiroshi."
Hiroshi drooled a greeting as he stared at Akane. Daisuke whapped him
over the head.
Akane looked at Ranma, who glared slightly at Hiroshi. Hiroshi wasn't
suicidal, and he quickly looked away.
"I'm Ranma Saotome of the Saotome school of Anything Goes Martial Arts,
and this is Akane Tendo."
"Of the Tendo school of Anything Goes, so don't get any ideas."
Hiroshi put his hands up placatingly. "Easy, easy, I didn't mean
anything by it.
Daisuke jumped in. "Yeah, we just wanted to say hi. Everyone knows
who you are, but you haven't hung around long enough to meet anyone
else."
Akane glanced over at Ranma, who still seemed slightly peeved, then
back up at the two boys. "Why is this such a weird school?"
Ranma shifted his position on the grass and relaxed slightly. Taking
this as a positive sign, the two sat down as well.
"I dunno, I've heard things about some other schools that make this one
seem almost normal," Daisuke replied.
"I think it's something in the water, or at least has something to do
with water," Hiroshi supplied.
Both Ranma and Akane paled slightly. "Yeah, I was afraid of that,"
they echoed.
Hiroshi and Daisuke's jaws dropped, but they didn't notice.
Recovering, Hiroshi gestured at their clothing. "Why don't you wear the
school uniforms like everyone else?"
A large sumo wrestler ran past wearing a loincloth, trailed by a male
student in a lab coat and skirt who was waving a remote control. Nabiki
was about 3 seconds behind, yelling at people to place their bets now.
Ranma shrugged and opened his bento. Akane did the same. She paused
before starting to eat. "Let's just say we all have our reasons.
Picked these up in China, been wearing 'em since." Then she and Ranma
proceeded to inhale their lunches.
Daisuke looked puzzeled. "I thought they would be stinking by now."
"Mmm?"
"If you'd been wearing them since you got them in China."
Ranma choked on his mouthful of rice, spraying some food directly at
the two opposite from him. Akane absentmindedly snatched it out of the
air and swallowed it.
"They've been washed since then, Daisuke," Hiroshi groaned, both amazed
and repulsed by the eating machines in front of him.
Ranma finished his bento and leaned back contentedly. "Yeah, half the
time we don't even have to take them off first." *SPLASH* "See what I
mean?" Ranma continued in a higher voice, slightly muffled by the pail
Akane held just off of her head where it had nearly hit.
Akane covered her face with one hand and pulled the pail off with the
other. A janitor ran by and grabbed it without slowing down, screaming
death threats at the rest of the students.
"Certainly lively today, isn't it Daisuke?" Hiroshi asked.
"Indeed." Neither moved.
Ranma stood up and walked back into the school. Akane stayed with the
two boys.
"Uh," Akane began hesitantly. "You seem to be taking this pretty
good."
Hiroshi nodded.
"Yes, aren't we?" Daisuke commented.
Silence.
Ranma came back, still damp, but male now, and sat back down. "They in
shock?"
"Yep."
"We get that a lot don't we?"
"Mmm, um, hey, guys?"
"Yes?" they answered.
"You gonna be okay?" she asked.
"Sure, after all, this is Furinken. Right Hiroshi?"
Hiroshi nodded. "Ah, I was wondering, Akane, would you by any
chance..."
Akane sighed. "Yes."
Hiroshi nodded. "After all, it would only make sense..." he mumbled to
himself.
Daisuke looked over at Ranma. "How?"
Ranma shrugged. "It's a curse, literally. Training ground in China
called Jusenkyo, full of pools of cursed water. Fall in, turn into
whatever drowned there last." He paused thoughtfully.
Akane realized what he was thinking about. "Yeah, it was his stupid
father's idea to train there, and we fell in different pools. He got
girl, I got boy."
"Is it all just people?"
"No, heh heh. Pops got the spring of drowned panda. Suits him
perfectly if you ask me." Ranma smiled grimly.
The school bell rang, signaling the end of lunch, and everyone crowded
in the door.
Ranma and Akane watched Hiroshi and Daisuke fairly closely as they
walked in, but weren't able to recognize any emotions on their faces.
It wasn't until later that day, after they had been in class for an
hour, that Hiroshi turned to look at Daisuke. Daisuke turned to look at
Hiroshi. They both turned to look at Ranma and Akane, then back at each
other. Daisuke struggled to contain a smile, Hiroshi grinned outright.
Then they both burst out laughing, earning Hiroshi a thrown eraser and
Daisuke a thrown cork.
They kept them both as souvenirs.
Ranma and Akane seemed perfectly happy to snooze the day away, not a
care in the world. Until the last class of the day.
Gym class.
After narrowly avoiding disaster born of the very old habit of
following Ranma into the locker room, Akane shook her head ruefully and
headed for the girls' locker room.
She remembered the first time she had changed in a boy's locker room,
how embarrassed she'd been. She had grown used to it fairly quickly
though, after all, at boys' school she couldn't very well use the girls
changing rooms. ("Hi. What sports do you play?")She had never shown
any of the boys what she looked like undressed, it would have given away
the secret.
She quickly picked out a locker and started peeling clothes off,
ignoring the rest of the girls. ("Boxer shorts?") She wasn't bothered
by seeing boys run around unclothed, ("Hey, are you paying attention?")
and since she had used the bathroom stalls to change herself...
*SPLASH* "That should get your attentEEK!"
Akane was startled out of her reverie by a cup of water thrown by one
of the girls. "Waa?" he spluttered.
"A BOY IN HERE!"
"GET THE HENTAI!"
Akane-kun held up his hands in a frantic attempt to ward off the girls'
anger. "No wait! You've got it all wrong! ACK!"
He was promptly buried under a pile of wooden mallets.
****************
After class, Ranma was just finishing dressing when a wet, naked, very
bruised and scratched Akane-kun jumped in through the widow from the
outside. He flattened himself against the wall below the window and
panted heavily, clutching the tatters of his clothes to his chest.
Ranma raised one eyebrow. The rest of the boys all clustered around
the newcomer.
Akane-kun waved franticly at them, hissing, "Stay back! They'll
notice! If they ask, I did NOT just come in here!"
Ranma looked out the window and saw a large mob of women carrying
brooms and such marching along beside men holding cameras and walking
funny, as well as a few cops and one large orangutan. They never looked
his way.
He shot a questioning glance at Akane, who was just putting on the
remains of his clothes.
Akane-kun winced as cloth made contact with tender skin. "I got
splashed while undressed in the girls locker room."
"Whoa! Man, you streaked through the girls locker room?" one boy asked
in amazement.
Akane-kun kind of shrugged. "Not exactly..."
Another shook his head in awe. "You must have got one HELL of a set of
balls to do something like that at this school. Did it hurt?"
Akane winced. "Actually, that was exactly the problem... The mallets
didn't feel too good, but they weren't that bad either. The problem
came when they kicked me out into the hall without any clothes."
Everyone nodded sympathetically.
"I got chased up and down the halls by a mob of girls, then a couple
teachers joined in. I had to run out the front." Akane shuddered.
"They wouldn't quit. There actually ended up being MORE of them. I
tried to escape by hiding in some bushes." Akane looked at them
squarely.
"Prickly bushes."
Everyone winced and crossed their legs.
"That didn't last long. So I tried to lose them in the men's side of a
public bath. Then all the guys started chasing me instead of the
girls."
Ranma nodded while everyone else looked confused.
"I spent half an hour running naked through Nerima before I was able to
turn back to the school. I may never be able to show my face in public
again."
Ranma patted his shoulder consolingly. One boy piped up, "Hey, at least
you got some exercise, I mean, you did miss gym class." Everyone nodded
and murmured in agreement.
Akane shook his head. "The worst part is, when I ducked back in the
girls' locker room to get my clothes, I found out that some girls stayed
behind and hid in the locker room. Apparently they were afraid of me."
He eased himself into a more comfortable position on the floor. "Of
course, I would HAVE to run BACK in, still naked, into a room with girls
afraid that I was gonna get them or something. I splashed myself with
hot water to calm them down. I explained the curse to them."
A few boys looked confused.
"So one of them pours another glass of water on me, says she wants to
see it again.* Then the mob finally catches up to me and decides I'm
attacking the girls. I barely have time to grab my clothes and run."
Akane flopped down on the floor and sighed. "I hate my life."
****************
At the end of school Hiroshi grabbed Daisuke. "Hey man, they don't
know their way around very good right?"
Daisuke nodded. "Yeah, are you saying..."
"That we should get them and show them the area..."
"Incidentally getting a free show..."
"Of two very fine female bodies."
"Yeah, lets get them."
"Knew you'd see it my way." Hiroshi grinned.
Akane-chan and Ranma-kun were both walking out the gate, Akane rather
stiffly, when Hiroshi and Daisuke appeared beside them.
"Hey, Ranma," Hiroshi began.
"Yeah, Akane," continued Daisuke.
"We thought that maybe,"
"You would like to hang out after school,"
"We'll show you around,"
"The best hang outs,"
"Fun places to go,"
"That kind of thing." Daisuke finished.
Verbally assaulted and off balance, Ranma and Akane could do little but
nod as the energetic duo herded them down the street.
They walked together for awhile, Hiroshi asked where they were from and
Ranma and Akane took turns explaining.
"We were born here," Ranma said, gazing into shop windows as the
passed.
"I used to live with my sisters, but I was sent with Ranma when his
father took him on a training journey."
Daisuke shook his head. "I bet that was fun."
Ranma piped up. "Actually, it was kinda. We learned a lot about the
art, and had some fun beating up people."
Akane smiled. "Yeah, it was kinda fun." She laughed slightly. "We
were terrified at first, thought the old man was gonna sell us into
slavery."
Hiroshi laughed too. "Yeah, I bet that was pretty scary."
Daisuke smiled.
"Yeah, we were so scared we ran away. Hey Akane, remember? We managed
to get away from Pops and hid..."
"Yeah, we managed to avoid him for a while," she continued excitedly.
"Then he almost caught us, so we hopped on a ship heading for Kyoto, or
so we thought." Ranma said smiling.
Hiroshi boggled.
"Heh, then we got caught and almost thrown overboard as stowaways!"
Akane laughed. "They finally decided to let us live, but only because
they were making us do all kinds of work on the ship!"
Daisuke's eyes opened wide and his jaw dropped.
Ranma whooped. "Listen, listen, you'll love this part! It turned out
that it was a fishing boat, and when it got back, we"
"Were sold to his Pop!" Akane finished for him, giggling.
"So we really was sold as slaves!"
Hiroshi and Daisuke stopped and stared at them.
"You guys are REALLY weird you know."
"Yeah, and I ain't talking about the curses," Hiroshi seconded.
Ranma looked them over.
Hiroshi just looked back at him.
Akane spoke up. "Well then, lets go find someplace to eat. Food
always cheers me up, right Ranma?"
"You betcha. You got money?"
Shrugging, they checked their pockets and discovered that yes, they did
have enough money. Hiroshi led the way as they went to a local cafe.
*CLANK* *SPLASH*
Ranma-chan held a tub up with her fist, preventing it from landing on
Akane's head. She had not prevented the water from reaching her though,
so she was currently a he.
Akane-kun grabbed the tub in one hand and jumped back, looking for the
source. A man leaned out of a window four stories up, preparing to
apologize.
*SMACK*
He flew up and backwards, propelled by the force of the thrown metal.
"BE MORE CAREFUL NEXT TIME!" Ranma-chan yelled at him. "OR YOU MIGHT
GET HURT!"
Akane-kun grabbed her and steered her away, still seething. Akane felt
the matter had been taken care of, but Ranma was still a bit upset.
"Ah, dammit. Now we need hot water," she grumbled.
Hiroshi had been drooling slightly at the sight of the red shirt
plastered across the ample chest, but the intimidation of the other
rather ample chest did curtail most of the thoughts.
"Is hot water how you change back?" Daisuke asked.
"Yeah," Ranma-chan growled cutely. Hiroshi's knees trembled, but not
from fear. "Cold water activates it, hot water changes you back."
"Well, you can get some in the restaurant. They have bathrooms."
"Okay," Akane said.
A little while later they arrived at the cafe, Hiroshi and Daisuke
having felt the need to point out major landmarks along the route.
"Check it out, man. It's that corner where Yosho got into a fight with
his girlfriend last year." "Is he walking yet?" Ect.
They had changed back in the restroom and had just started to sit down
by the window when Akane noticed something she had long gotten used to
popping up out of nowhere. A large guy was walking by outside, holding
an umbrella down close to the top of his head. Or perhaps limping would
be a better term. Still, only one person she knew carried that style of
umbrella, and she jumped up and grabbed Ranma. Ranma barely had time
for a startled exclamation as she dragged him back out the door.
Hiroshi looked at Daisuke, who shrugged. They both followed, at a
more sedate pace.
"HEY!" Akane yelled. The figure spun around.
"RYOGA! Hey man! How's it going?" Ranma exclaimed.
Apparently not well, Ryoga looked pretty bad. His clothes were in
shreds, his umbrella was dented, and he had a hollow gaze that indicated
a severe lack of sleep. Still, he brightened considerably at the sight
of his two friends. He dropped the umbrella (cracking the sidewalk) and
grabbed them both in a bone-crushing hug that left them both gasping.
"Oh thank god. Please, oh please, could you get her off?" He
indicated his leg, or, more specifically, what was clinging to it.
"AAAAHHHHHH!!!!" they screamed. "Cat!" Ranma continued, as they both
jumped back, nearly knocking over Hiroshi and Daisuke, who had just came
out the door.
Ranma had plastered himself to the wall in fear. Akane stood her
ground, teeth chattering slightly, before she was able to pull herself
back together. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut in concentration,
then relaxed slowly and opened them again.
"Nice kitty, she said softly, extending her hand slowly. "Nice kitty,
pretty kitty."
And it was, a medium sized tan cat with long fur. It turned to look
at her, and hissed. And jumped with a speed it had never used before,
as a powerful punch thudded into the thigh it had been clinging to.
"OWW!" yelled Ryoga. "Damn, Akane, what'd you do that for?"
The cat had rapidly scooted behind him, keeping him between herself
and Akane.
Ryoga grabbed Akane as she started to make another move. "Thanks
Akane, but don't kill her!"
Akane struggled briefly, but backed away.
Ryoga sighed, and turned to the two boys who were trying to get Ranma
to respond intelligently. "Would one of you go and get some hot water?"
"Huh?" Daisuke asked.
"Hot water. I need some."
Understanding came to Daisuke's eyes. "Oh, you're really a girl like
Akane?"
Ryoga smacked his face with his hand. "No, the cat is. Perfume, come
on." *glomp* "YEEOWW!" *SMACK* "YEEOWW! Akane! Would you knock it
off!?" Ryoga yelled from his position on the ground.
"That's what I was trying to do," she replied reasonably.
The cat cowered behind Ryoga's body and growled softly.
Daisuke ran back holding a glass of hot water. He walked over and
poured it on the cat, instantly transforming it into a beautiful young
woman. A beautiful NAKED young woman. Ryoga, who had a very
interesting view from his position on the ground, and who had also
forgotten about clothes, gushed blood from his nose and passed out.
Daisuke, who had expected a girl but had not expected a naked girl,
also got a nosebleed and fell over. Hiroshi died with a smile on his
face, or at least that's what it looked like. He twitched
occasionally. Ranma was too busy being scared of the cat that had been
there to really notice the girl. Akane noticed though, and frowned.
She took a few steps closer to Ranma and grabbed him closely.
The other girl's eyes widened slightly, and she wrapped herself
around Ryoga. "Airen," she said.
THEN Akane noticed that the girl was naked, and that she was
apparently Chinese. And THEN the rain started. Akane's eyes widened as
she went through her own transformation, but also as she watched not
only the cat change, but Ryoga change as well.
Ranma was shocked back to her senses by the water. "CAT!" And off
she went again.
Akane sighed, and looked down at the two boys lying on the sidewalk. A
few well-placed slaps revived them.
"Huh, wha?"
"Pretty lady..." Hiroshi trailed off into giggles.
"Guys, could you grab them and carry them to the house? I'm gong to
have my hands full with Ranma."
Daisuke took a look at the shaking girl and nodded. Then he looked at
his assigned task. "Aww man. The cat's back, and it brought dinner.
That poor duck. Never stood a chance."
****************
Nabiki let herself into the house. "I'm home!" she called out. She
slipped off her shoes and put them by the door, noticing the extra pairs
already there. She continued on into the house.
She was rather startled by the trail of blood to the living room, and
her pulse quickened. She ran in to find her older sister tending to a
large boy wearing a headband and a blanket. Akane and Ranma were also
there, each in their proper forms. Hiroshi and Daisuke she recognized,
being among the few boys that didn't attack her every morning. The
other girl was a mystery.
She was wrapped in a blanket much like the boy and she cradled his
head in her lap, occasionally wiping at his face. She looked at Nabiki
as she entered, but seemed more interested in glaring at Akane.
Kasumi was just tying an ice pack around the boy's leg, covering up a
rather nasty bruise. She looked up at Nabiki. "Oh, Nabiki. I didn't
hear you come in."
Nabiki gestured at the mess and the extra people. "What happened?"
Ranma spoke up. "This is a friend of ours from boy's school. Ryoga
Hibiki. We don't know who she is, she doesn't speak much Japanese."
Nabiki nodded. "Ryoga, yeah, the boy from Jusenkyo right?" Seeing
Ranma's nod she continued. "What happened to him?"
Akane looked kind of embarrassed. "I was just trying to get the c...
cat off of him," she mumbled.
Ranma jumped slightly.
"Cat?" Nabiki asked.
Daisuke spoke up for the first time. "Her. She changes into a cat."
Hiroshi giggled again and drooled, earning him a dark look from the
girl. Ranma jumped again and Akane flinched.
Nabiki noted that.
"I wonder how Ryoga got cursed?" Ranma said aloud.
"Really? What does he turn into?"
"A duck."
"A duck?"
"A duck," Ryoga said from his place on the floor. "Damn him."
Akane looked at Ranma, then back at Ryoga. "Him who?"
"The person I hate most in the world. The same guy that ruined my
childhood has ruined my life. After I saw you I was still in the area,
walking on this cliff and this guy runs from out of nowhere and knocks
me off." His hands clenched into fists. "I followed him to get my
revenge, but I lost him after a while. It's a good thing I already knew
how to change back, I wouldn't want to face the guide like this. He was
really hungry." Ryoga shuddered. He could still remember that pig's
squeals.
Everyone looked pensive for a moment. Ranma spoke up. "What about
her?" he indicated. The girl looked up at him. "Where'd she come
from?"
Ryoga sat up, feebly protesting the help from the girl. Not that he
felt weak, but he didn't want to hurt her feelings, now that she wasn't
digging claws into his leg. He noticed his own state of undress, and
blushed furiously. "Ah, could I get some clothes?"
Kasumi stood up. "I'll get them. And something for the girl too."
"She had some, I think they're in my pack."
Kasumi nodded and went to get them.
After dressing quickly and drinking some tea that Kasumi brought them,
everyone sat down at the table. Ryoga was dressed normally, and Perfume
was wearing a short Chinese dress that kept Hiroshi and Daisuke happy
and Ryoga in a state of near-nosebleed.
Ryoga started his tale. "After I got out of the water and changed
back, I took off after the guy. I caught up with him outside this
village, fairly close to the valley I think, I'm not too sure. He was
talking to Perfume." He indicated the girl.
Perfume looked up at the sound of her name. {What are you talking
about, Husband?} she said in Chinese.
Ryoga concentrated briefly. "Umm, {I tell how meet.}," he replied in
the same language.
Akane and Ranma were both thinking the same thing. (The Amazon
village. He went to the Amazon village. That girl is an Amazon.) They
both tensed up and watched her closely.
Perfume had noticed the looks she had been getting, and had also
recognized the girl that had defeated the village champion a few weeks
ago. She had realized that the girl was really a boy though, and
wondered how Shampoo was going to take the news.
Ryoga continued, getting angry. "Well, I had my umbrella, and when I
saw the bastard I just threw. It was a good throw, but he dodged,
forcing me to hit Perfume by accident! When I get my hands on him..."
Nabiki, Hiroshi, and Daisuke watched in horror as his hands clenched
into fists from where they had been flat on the table. Through the
table. They felt sorry for the guy if Ryoga ever found him.
Perfume spoke up. She knew some Japanese, and had been learning more
as she followed, and recognized where Ryoga had beaten her. "Airen
throw good, {defeat} Perfume {faster than anyone but trainer.}"
This confused everyone else.
"Yeah, now she thinks I'm her husband."
Ranma grinned a bit, and even Akane smiled. "Heh, never though you
had it in you, you sly dog."
Ryoga flushed. "It's not like that," he stammered.
Akane nudged Ryoga with her elbow. "Hey, least she's a cute one,
huh?"
Nabiki stared at Akane. Hiroshi giggled again.
Ryoga laughed nervously. "Ah, I didn't want to get engaged to her, I
mean, if it wasn't for that bastard... speaking of which, I need to go
kill him now."
Perfume tried to position herself between Ryoga and Akane, forcing
Akane to step back.
"You sure man?" Ranma asked. "Ya just got here."
"Oh, yes, please stay the night. It's really no trouble," Kasumi said.
"I'm sure we could put you and your girl in the dojo. C'mon Ryoga.
Tell me where you've been," Akane pleaded.
Ranma frowned as he thought of something. "Just keep Perfume away from
water alright?"
Ryoga nodded and relayed the request to Perfume.
Nabiki knew she didn't know much about her sister. She knew a few
things though, that she was in love with Ranma, that she turned into a
boy, that she had a very masculine self image, that she was very good at
martial arts, and that she had a few emotional problems. She mulled
over the newest little bit of information. Her sister and Ranma were
both apparently afraid of cats. (Why?) she wondered. (Akane's not too
bad, but Ranma nearly panics when it's even mentioned. Is it worth
asking?) Finally coming to a decision, she interrupted Ryoga in the
middle of an A-Z list of city and country names.
(Hmm, tact? Or put it bluntly... I'd better come right out with it. I
don' think they'd understand me otherwise.) She cleared her throat.
"Why are you afraid of cats?"
Ryoga paused in the middle of the 'I' section and paled. (She didn't.
NO. She did.)
Daisuke watched closely, curious as well. Hiroshi even snapped out of
it.
Ranma jumped and Akane flinched, but this time it was Ranma that put a
reassuring hand on her shoulder. Akane relaxed visibly.
Looking Nabiki square in the eye, he said, "You don't want to know.
I'll say this much, it was pops fault. Now, Ryoga, what were you doing
in Italy?"
Nabiki held up a hand. "I don't think so. I want to know just what's
so terrible about a cute little kitty."
Ranma just flinched this time, but Akane tensed up considerably.
Nabiki looked over to Akane and her voice dropped. "Akane, tell me,"
she asked almost pleadingly.
Akane looked at Ranma. "She needs to know. Just in case..."
Ranma sighed and nodded. He had a thought. "Ryoga? You know the
story right?"
Ryoga nodded. "You want me to tell them?"
"Please?" asked Akane.
He reluctantly nodded and Ranma and Akane left, both walking in a very
determined manner towards the two men playing shogi outside. After a
quick attack that destroyed the game and sent Genma into the pond, they
proceeded to further endanger the panda species.
Nabiki called Soun and Kasumi back in to the living room.
After telling Perfume that he'd explain later, he began the story.
"Genma put Ranma and Akane through a bunch of weird training exercises.
Some were really dangerous, others were just stupid. This one was
stupidly dangerous."
Soun sat up straighter. While he knew several training methods that
involved cats, and many many more that were stupidly dangerous, he only
knew of one stupidly dangerous training method that involved cats.
(Oh. No. He. Didn't.)
"I found out about this about a month after I first met them. Our
family dog chased a cat in front of them and they both freaked. I asked
them about it, and they said something about the Neko-ken."
"GENMA!!" Soun screamed.
Genma-panda replied by flying just past Soun and crashing into a wall.
Akane-kun ran in after him.
Soun ducked, but Ryoga ignored the interruption and continued. "Genma
had found this old training manual that described the Neko-ken, a cat
fighting style. It even said it was a stupid technique. I can barely
believe that Ranma's dad would do something like that, but after seeing
the evidence I had no choice. Saotome tied Akane up and covered him"
"Ryoga, Akane was a girl."
"Oh, yeah..."
"AND STILL AM DAMMIT!" Akane-kun yelled as he smashed the panda in a
low arc, back to where Ranma was receiving.
Ryoga shook his head. "Anyway, he tied Akane up, coated him in fish
and dropped him into a pit full of starving cats."
Everyone was too shocked to correct him this time.
"He... He tortured my little sister?" Nabiki asked in disbelief.
Soun's face went white. Kasumi couldn't even say 'Oh, my.' She tried
though.
"It didn't work, so he tried again. And again. Ranma tried to stop
him, but what could a kid do against an adult? Finally, Saotome let
Ranma take Akane's place. Ranma went nuts, but not before Akane did
trying to save HIM. Now, if he gets too close to a cat, he starts
acting like one. He's really dangerous like that, I watched him shred
stone with his fingers once."
Hiroshi spoke up cautiously. "Um, isn't this where you say 'Gotcha!
It was all just a big joke!' right?"
Ryoga shook his head and let it drop.
Daisuke shuddered, and motioned to Hiroshi. "Well, we're past the time
we need to go home. Thank you for your hospitality, and we'll make
excellent alibis should a certain panda come up missing." Hiroshi stood
up as well and mumbled something appropriate.
No one said anything as they walked out.
Kasumi had real rage in her voice when she said, "Father? Why did you
let that 'person' take Akane?"
Soun stood up slowly, and shook his head. "I don't know. I think...
I'll go kill Genma. Or have a lie down." He walked outside.
Outside there was a definite lack of violent sounds.
Nabiki just sat there.
* Heh, Akane is SO clueless. Which 'it'? ^_-
A Ryoga and Perfume side chapter is in the works, telling of their
adventures. MUCH more light hearted. We'll also get to hear what
happened on Nabiki's date in the next chapter.
Special thanks to(I finally put a thank you list!):
Wade
Lara
DB
Donny C
Everyone involved in Wade�s altered destiny project
Everyone on FFIRC (too many people, and yes Lara is in this list but
she deserves special thanks, same with DC and DB)
Everyone on the FFML that has replied to me
Everyone on the FFML that has read this
And everyone else on the FFML (but they�ll never know...)
Let me know what you think, I just love attention. Thanks. Send
comments, criticism, and copyright infringement lawsuits to
ballisticsausage@hotmail.com, or catch me on ICQ at 37606443 Flame
me! I'm heat resistant! Any MST3K will cause the offending person to
be put on my list of people I'd donate a kidney to. No liver, it
probably won't live anyway.
First created on 7/12/99. My birthday! Wai!
--
Ragun P. Moody
AKA Kichigai
R.P.M. Grafix
520 Spring Rd.
Rison, AR 71665
(870) 357-8078
ICQ# 37606447
http://lavender.fortunecity.com/clockwork/416/anime.htm
Yeah, this is my real address. Find me in person. I DARE ya.