Not bad, but I think more detail would help this. Specifically, I'd
really like to see the story get into Happosai's head more and show us
exactly what makes him do what he does. As it stands, the story kind of
tells us things that would be more effectively shown by really going
into detail on what it's like to be Happy.

BTW, Matsudaira should mention something about having had a great deal
of difficulty trying to decipher the journal. Happosai's writing is
known to be quite illegible.