Well, here goes.. people have managed to talk me into not hiding under a
rock for the rest of my days...
My thanks to the following people for being willing to reply to my
story.. there were a few others, but while I prepare to switch over to
Linux my harddrive is in something of a state of disrepair...
Donny Cheng
Rob Barba
Micah Potasnik
Jason Liao
Ben K. Gnobi
"Stars Of Tears" Theme from Xenogears
Opening Title for Legacy
(Note: These are the lyrics to the world-map song in Xenogears)
/*
The Sailor Moon logo comes in, assembling from various
pieces, spelling out BISHOUJOSENSHI SERAMUUN: L in a
combination of hiragana, katakana and romanji.
*/
Your Fingertips moving gently to my heart
The force of Life goes on and on...
The song remains
Like a haunting melody
Of angel music held in chains!
/*
Sailor Moon, standing on the hillside from the end of the
Sailorstars, Tuxedo Mask behind her, his arms wrapped around
her shoulders from behind. Her wings are folded behind her.
There's a shadow behind them of a man in a long coat,
possibly a trenchcoat.
*/
And I ask you
Can we ease the pain of those who lost? (The force of Life goes on)
Can we know the cause of all this sorrow? (Tears of Loneliness)
Can we catch the tears of a broken world?
Falling down upon the earth...
Falling down...
/*
A Man in Black who's face remains unseen holding a castle
made of crystal in his hand. It comes into sharp focus as
if it were being sculpted by an unseen force in his hand. A
Man in White appears, takes the crystalline castle and
shatters it.
*/
The waves of time take me deeper into you
A haze as blue as summer skies...
And turn to find
The key will not unlock the door
This broken bird away it flies!
/*
The castle of the Silver Millennium, a male angel flying
above it in the sky. The angel sees the image of a red-
haired woman of striking beauty and reaches out for her,
only for her to fade away.
*/
And I ask you
Can we ease the pain of those who lost? (The force of Life goes on)
Can we know the cause of all this sorrow? (Tears of Loneliness)
Can we catch the tears of a broken world?
Falling down upon the earth...
Falling down...
/*
Three shadowy men, all three in long coats, stand back to
back, slowly rotating as if they were standing on a platform
in motion. One in brown, one in black and one in white.
Their faces cannot be seen. The Man in Black extends his
right index finger and points up. The Man in White makes a
similar gesture, save he points down. The Man in Brown
holds his hands out, a golden crystal hovering above them.
*/
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Once Upon A Time...
In a far off land where magic was as real as anything science has
brought us today there lived a very sad prince. The prince wasn't sad
for the normal reasons. He had a beautiful wife, his every need was
taken care of by his servants and he lived in the lap of luxury.
The prince was sad because he was an only child.
The prince was born to be a powerful sorcerer. However, in his
land no sorcerer could become the ruler. Either he would be forced to
give up the magic that had been a part of his life from the day he had
been born, or the throne would go to another branch of the family, and
he would no longer be a prince. It wasn't that he wouldn't have minded
not being a prince anymore, but he was quietly afraid of the other
branch of his family, who's reputation was a dark and sinister one.
It was on his twenty-first birthday that his world changed
forever. He and his lovely wife traveled from their home at the
furthest reaches of his mother's realm. A great feast was planned to
celebrate the prince's coming of age, though to the prince it would be a
day of mourning as he would have to surrender his magic forever.
The feast was spectacular, like none the kingdom had seen before.
Those invited to the party celebrated in grand fashion, and all agreed
the experience would be one they would never forget.
However.. the handsome prince was nowhere to been seen....
It was late in the night when the prince came out to the
celebration. He made for a grim spectacle indeed, reminding everyone
that this was to be the day a part of him would die forever. He was
dressed from head to foot in black, in mourning, as was his beautiful
wife.
They went to the middle of the dance floor and danced a dance of
eerie beauty, just one dance. And all who saw that dance wept, for they
had been celebrating on the most painful day of the prince's life. That
dance's memory, terrible and beautiful would live on in their hearts
forever.
As the last chord of the grim waltz was sounded, a thin wail came
from the edge of the ballroom, and all eyes turned to the sound.
The prince's mother, who many had forgotten about in their talk of
the prince and his absence, had arrived. The queen walked with great
difficulty, and her guardians kept to her side with looks of purpose on
their brows.
The queen whispered something to her beloved son and kissed him on
the forehead, on the birthmark that marked him as her son. She said
then to everyone, "There will be no death on this day; the prince's
sister has been born!"
The prince took his infant sister from her mother's arms and, with
tears in his eyes whispered something for her and her alone to hear. It
is said that he gave her a True Name on that day, that would insure that
she would forever know happiness.
No-one has ever discovered the True Name of the little princess,
but the name carries great power from her brother. As long as her name
exists, somewhere in the hearts of mankind, she will never truly perish.
And They All Lived Happily Ever After..." Tsukino Ikuko murmured
softly.
Little Usagi Tsukino smiled in her sleep as her mother closed the
book of bedtime stories. Her mother smiled and kissed her on the
forehead as she pulled the covers on her bed around her warmly. "Good
night, Little Princess..." she whispered as she crept softly out of the
room.
The Starguild Presents:
A Random Act of Fandom...
Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon: Legacy
Episode One: Enter a Man in Black
BSSM Created By: Takeuchi Naoko
Story By: Berk' Watkins
The teacher frowned as he peered over the English book and slung a
piece of chalk expertly across the classroom, to careen perfectly off
the forehead of a sleeping student. All the while, continuing to drone
through the lesson, sounding just as bored with it as the students were.
At length he finished the lesson and closed the book. "Tsukino-
san, I would like to speak with you after school..." he said in a soft
tone as he packed up his satchel. He wrote the homework assignment on
the board and returned the class's bow before walking out.
"H-hai, Satori-sensei...." Usagi Tsukino said in a small voice.
Ryu Satori was a recent graduate of University, with a master's in
English education. He'd lived much of his life abroad, his mother
having been in the American Army. His mixed heritage showed only a
little, his eyes a piercing blue and his skin a little pale for the
Japanese norm.
He was tall for a Japanese man, standing at six feet and lean,
perhaps a little too lean. He wore a button-down white shirt and black
pants, as was typical for the teachers at that high-school. As a break
with tradition, he wore his hair abnormally long, down to the middle of
his back, and pulled up off his shoulders into a low-hanging ponytail.
He wandered into the teachers' offices and slumped down at his
desk. He put his satchel aside and started going through some papers.
Minako Aino... She spoke English as well as he could, though her
writing skills showed a lack of polish.
Ami Mizuno... A brilliant student, well on her way to the top of
her graduating class.
Makoto Kino... A nice girl, who tried very, very hard to act as
if she wasn't a good six inches taller than anyone else at the school.
And then there was Usagi Tsukino...
He sighed...
A sweet, sweet girl.. who he was convinced had not a thought in
her head sometimes. It wasn't that she wasn't intelligent, really...
She was just very focused on a set of priorities that most assuredly did
not focus on or anywhere near her schoolwork.
He wondered what it was that made these girls attract his notice.
There was something eerily familiar about them that he couldn't put his
finger on...
Minako seemed to want to try hard... There were certain things
she put a startling amount of energy into, such as volleyball. But when
it came to regular school work she hardly every applied herself. It
wasn't that she was scatterbrained, she just put no effort into it, as
if she didn't see a point to it all.
Ami was a brilliant student, who had to be pried out of her shell
sometimes. When his superiors weren't peering over his shoulder and he
broke with the lesson plan, it was always hard to get a response out of
her.
Makoto had a heart bigger than her 5'8" frame could possibly hold,
but the psych classes he'd had to take back at the University told him
there was something under the surface... According to her records she
was an orphan....
He shook his head and rubbed at his eyes.. his mind had wandered
again, he had papers to grade...
He never got around to pondering Usagi Tsukino until much later...
Usagi knocked on the door to the teachers' offices after school
was over and gulped. Satori-sensei was a mountain of a man, even more
physically intimidating than her boyfriend could be, when the teacher
wanted to be.
"Enter."
Usagi slid open the door to find her English teacher at his desk,
pondering the last test. He'd undone the top button of his shirt and
put his necktie into his satchel, one end was hanging out of it, plain
to see.
"Tsukino-san..." he began.
"I'msosorryIfellasleepinthemiddleofclass!" Usagi blurted out,
bowing low.
Satori blinked. "I forgive you, Tsukino-san, however I advise you
try to get more sleep at night. You *have* shown progress from your
performance last year, however not much." He gestured to the seat next
to his desk. "I'd like to know how you study for my class," he said.
"Ah.. well... My friends and I get together before the test
and..." she muttered sheepishly.
Satori smiled slightly. "And I bet you have your friend Aino-san
help you study the night before? I remember when I was your age, my
friends were always asking me to help them with their language classes.
I speak English, Japanese, Korean and a little German, all because, like
your friend I've lived in those places for long periods of time." He
thought about something for a moment and then pulled a few books out of
his satchel. "I'm going to give you some extra work out of class,
Tsukino-san. Your problem is not grammar, it's vocabulary." He handed
her a Japanese-to-English dictionary and a rather thick novel.
The novel had a painting of a dark-skinned man in dark robes,
holding a sword as if he were guarding a ceremonial post. To the man's
right was a woman in a blue and gold dress stepping out of a key-shaped
doorway.
"A little incentive. You should find this to be a very
interesting book.. If you can translate it," he remarked. "If you can
read that one, and can convince me you understood it, I'll loan you the
other one that the author has written so far..."
Usagi peered at the cover of the book and nodded.
"I'm not going to put you into detention, Tsukino-san. I had my
own nights where I stayed up all hours when I was your age. But please
don't make a habit of it..."
Usagi stood and bowed. "Thank you, Satori-sensei. I will do my
best..."
Satori chuckled and motioned with his hand. "Your friends are by
the door waiting for you. Why not join them?"
Usagi bowed again and bounced out. She was clearly grateful her
teacher hadn't hung her out to dry.
"Yea verily I speak to you, the wise man knows one can catch more
flies with honey than vinegar..." Ryu murmured in English as he finished
shoving his tie into his satchel and headed out the door.
The home was a rather nice, suburban one, well away from the
hustle and bustle of Tokyo proper. It was a wonderful place to settle
down and simply live life for the residents.
A semi-retired mad scientist.
A walking sign of the apocalypse.
A woman who had seen the death of a world.
Two soldiers of a hidden war.
All five lived under the same roof in an effort to regain some
aspect of the humanity they had surrendered at one time or another. In
their opinion, they had found a time to relax from the stresses of
knowing the world wasn't entirely as mundane as it seemed to the public
at large.
It was morning, around breakfast time.
"Are you okay, Daddy?" Hotaru Tomoe asked her father.
Professor Tomoe looked positively horrible. His complexion was
pallid, and his eyes seemed a bit glazed. "I've just been feeling a bit
under the weather lately, Princess...." he murmured, sipping at his
morning tea and turning slightly green. "Nothing I can't handle,
right?" he asked the woman sitting across the table, who had her head
buried in the newspaper.
"Indeed..." Setsuna Meiou remarked. She looked over the paper and
arched an eyebrow.
Hotaru failed to repress a sudden urge to giggle.
In another part of the house a small war was in progress.
Haruka Tenou dueled with her opponent in a fierce battle of wills.
She refused to knuckle under, no matter how hard it got.
Until, in her haste to keep up, she missed a key.
"Your turn to do the dishes..." Michiru Kaiou purred as she
stopped playing her violin.
Haruka sighed and slumped against the keys of the piano, releasing
a discordant note. "I don't know why I even try, Michiru. I ought to
know I'm outclassed..."
Michiru poorly hid a chuckle behind her hand.
In a rather ordinary suburb of Tokyo, well-known to be a sleepy,
quiet place for salarymen and their families to relax, a nondescript
woman dropped a small gem into a flower box as she walked down the
street. It was a lovely day out, not that she cared. She continued
along her way, boarding a bus and heading home.
The gemstone she left in the flower box beside a coffee shop
glowed momentarily, before sinking into the soil. The roots of the
plants around it started growing at a frightening pace, headed for the
gem as if were a source of nourishment more tempting than anything in
the world.
It had begun...
"Are you listening, Usagi?" Minako asked as she tried to help her
friends out with their English. She rummaged around in her backpack and
pulled out several American comics. "Ah, I found my copy of Mage!" she
said cheerfully. "The hero's a little old but he's still kinda
cute...."
Makoto peered over the blonde's shoulder. "He's going bald.. and
he has a glowing baseball bat..." she noted.
"But he's dashing and brave and..." Minako trailed off.
Rei sighed. Minako was getting weirder and weirder every day.
Usagi, on the other hand, wasn't paying attention to the exchange.
She had her nose buried in a book or two. Apparently, the story her
teacher had assigned to her had, by some minor miracle, managed to catch
her attention.
In a flower box, something twitched.
Across town, a man in an occult book store looked up and smiled.
He could feel something... It was almost time to begin...
He closed his book and locked up the shop for the day.
"Ah, it's good to be home!" a man remarked from the deck of a
Chinese freighter. He grinned broadly and adjusted a dial on the side
of a pair of goggles over his eyes, changing them from clear to dark.
"<Landfall at nine tonight?>" he asked the captain in Cantonese.
"<Yes, Professor Dawn,>" the captain replied.
"<Good. Make sure the Indian is ready to roll out. Then I and my
stones will be out of your hair....>" Doctor Keiichi Asagiri remarked
with a grin. How he could see after sundown with concealed eyes was
anyone's guess.
He took his leave and wandered back to his cabin, where he opened
the briefcase sitting on his desk and chuckled. There was a dull blue
glow coming from within the case, dimly illuminating the room in shades
of blue. "Five years of work and research finally paid off..." he
murmured softly. He closed the briefcase and put it down with the rest
of his luggage.
Hours later he rolled out of the freighter's hull via the loading
ramp. He was driving a classic motorcycle with a suitcase and the
briefcase crammed into the sidecar. He stood off of the bike for a
moment and waved to the captain before tugging his long, brown coat
several sides too large back into place on his lanky frame and ran a
hand through his mop-like silver hair.
It was definitely good to be back...
He clambered back on his motorcycle and headed off into town.
Ryu Satori fell asleep while grading papers.
In the darkness, eyes opened.
Cold, golden eyes.
The owner of those eyes yawned and stretched, wrapping a proper
disguise around his form. He peered around the room he had awakened in
and sifted through the memories of his new body.
Magic was gone?
No, if that were true then he wouldn't exist... Which meant the
ability to access it had been forgotten. He quickly surrounded himself
in arcane power to confound the senses. He stepped through the wall of
the apartment and floated to the ground.
He took stock of the area and flickered into invisibility.
The being reached out with his mind, seeking those who must know
the Art. He came up nearly empty. In a country of millions, only a few
were remotely Active. The being sighed and went off in search of
disturbances he could feel in the back of his mind.
A vacant lot where once a school had stood, and a weak ripple in
space-time. He sealed off the ripple quickly and collected several
buried artifacts, stealing them away in his coat.
Couldn't leave things like *those* lying around....
Under the cover of darkness the being traveled unseen, looking
into the past events around Tokyo, the Nerima District in particular.
Out of all of the city, Nerima in general was heavily steeped in the
residue of a mystical war or three.
What was going on here?
The entity slunk of into the night, searching for meaning behind
the odd ripples he was sensing.
A creature composed of masonry and plant matter burst out of the
wall where the gem had been planted in a flower box. It made not a
sound as it shambled over to the woman waiting for it.
The woman was no longer nondescript. She wore all white. A white
PVC bodysuit with a white trenchcoat over it to be exact. The only
other color she wore was a blue gem set into a black, metallic pin on
the lapel of her coat.
{Status report, Acheron...} a voice rasped in her mind.
{The golem is ready for testing. What are you orders?} the woman
in white, Acheron, thought.
{Just a test of over all power for now. I want to see how
resistant it is to the Senshis' magic....} The voice then chuckled.
{Don't try taking them on yourself. I've invested far too much time in
you for you to get yourself annihilated by Sailor Moon.}
{Understood.}
Acheron commanded the golem to begin rampaging. She then vanished
in a blast of cold air. There was no need for her to make sure the
normal authorities of Tokyo wouldn't stop it. The golem had no need to
fear anything Mundane short of a tank.
The golem looked around for a moment before deciding to wade
through the very coffee shop that had given birth to it moments before.
>From there, it started systematically annihilating anything that came
within its line of sight with brute force.
The man wrapped in an aura of distraction and confusion frowned as
something caught his attention. He frowned deeply and began to close
the distance to the disturbance.
Rampaging in Nerima is a dangerous prospect.
Rampaging in the Juuban sub-section of Nerima is a death-sentence.
Coincidence is a measurable force in Juuban...
And what happens when monsters attack?
They wander right by where a whole bunch of Senshi are as a
general rule. In the case of this creature, it blundered past the
shrine, making enough noise to wake the dead.
Perhaps it was the car it was dragging behind it?
It certainly was hard to miss...
Rei looked up from her studying. "Did I just hear.."
Makoto sighed. "The sound of a car being drug down the street by
something very large and unfriendly."
"Once more into the britches my friends!" Minako called out,
putting one foot on the table as she stood.
They didn't bother trying to correct her. What would the use be?
She'd just botch another quote later....
Usagi looked up from the book she had managed to get engrossed in
and looked towards the street. "Why couldn't they go somewhere else for
once?" she wondered. "Or pick a better time to attack..." she grumbled.
The Senshi pulled out their various transformation relics and
transformed into their superheroic alter-egos. None were too thrilled
with the concept of marching off to battle again. But it *was* their
job.. and the police certainly couldn't stop the average night-skulking
critter Juuban routinely played host to.
Thus was the battle joined....
And soon it became clear that they were glaringly outmatched.
"This can't be happening..." Sailor Moon stammered as her scepter
failed to do anything to her target. She looked at it and shook it.
"C'mon.. WORK!" she demanded. She looked up and eeped as she saw the
monster rushing at her with astounding speed for its bulk.
The monster was very shocked when it was brought up short, held in
a glassy sphere of light. It pounded against the walls of the globe, to
no avail.
"What are you doing?" a voice muttered.
The golem squawked at the sound of the voice, almost as if
something in its primitive mind was very, very afraid of the voice.
"Batsu Yomi..." the voice murmured, his voice somehow carrying.
The sphere's interior lit up like a small sun, blasting the
monster into dust.
"Sailor.. Moon?" the voice wondered. "Fascinating...."
Moon followed the sound of the voice to the top of a lightpole,
where a man in black was perched in a pose, who, while not quite as
grand as Tuxedo Kamen in bearing, he certainly came close. He was
dressed entirely in black, with a black trenchcoat over a black dress
shirt and pants. Around his neck hung a medallion, silver circle with a
six-pointed star within it, made of one piece of very thick, silver wire
bent into shape. His face was concealed from the bridge of his nose
down by a black, silk scarf.
And in the center of his forehead was a very familiar crescent.
A golden crescent moon.
"Who are you?" Moon asked. She watched as he effortlessly dropped
to the ground, absorbing the impact with his legs fluidly.
"I can remember all sorts of Senshi.. but not a Sailor Moon..." he
mused. "As to who I am, I think that can wait for another time. I have
a few things to look into...." He looked around at the Senshi as they
began to get up.
And abruptly, he was gone.
He didn't jump to the roofs.
He was simply.... Gone....
Sailor Moon blink-blinked.. "What just happened here?" she asked.
The other Senshi staggered to their feet, looking rather pained.
"I have no idea..." Mercury said quietly. She checked the area
unobtrusively for residual energies of the man in black's attack on the
monster. "Let's go.... I want to look over these readings closely."
The Senshi nodded and vanished into the night.
A man in white robes pondered the data.
The golem had been blasted apart by a magical attack of such
magnitude it had overwhelmed its innate magic resistance. He frowned
deeply and looked at Acheron. "I want you to hold back and observe next
time. I want to know what kind of magic-user can handle this magnitude
of mana output."
Acheron nodded.
"*Do*Not*Attack* and do not let them see you."
Acheron nodded again.
"Now go recharge."
Acheron nodded, yet again, and headed off.
The man in white sighed deeply and looked over the pattern
floating in his crystal ball. The currents of mana that had been
directed against the golem were beyond anything he had thought possible.
He silently cursed his inability to scry targets directly and pondered
the meaning of the currents a good while longer.
That night, Usagi yawned widely as she closed the book she'd been
assigned and looked at the clock. "Three in the morning?" she said
tiredly. "Ugh..." She staggered off to bed and, whether the fault of
the fight or the book, or a combination of both, she had a dream.
"Who are you?" a man asked.
Usagi turned around to look at the voice.
A man whose face was wrapped in shadow stood behind her and
slightly above her, several spheres of light circling around him slowly.
"Who are you?" he asked again.
She looked down at herself and realized she was in a long, white
gown. "Princess Serenity of the Moon Kingdom," she replied.
"incorrect..."
"Uh... Usagi Tsukino?" she said worriedly. What was this guy
looking for.
"incorrect..."
Usagi blink-blinked. "Well, I'm running out of real names, unless
you want me to say I'm both!" she snapped back. She hated dreams where
she knew what was going on and couldn't get out.
The Man in Black chuckled as he stepped out of the shadows. "I
think you might be on the right track..." he mused.
Usagi woke up abruptly to the sound of her alarm going off. She
groaned in frustration, because she couldn't for the life of her
remember what the Man in Black's face looked like in the dream.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"Small Two Of Pieces" Ending for Xenogears
Ending for Legacy
Run through the cold of the night
as passion burns in your heart
ready to fight, a knife held close by your side
Like a proud wolf alone in the dark
With eyes that watch the world
And my name like a shadow
On the face of the moon
/*
The Man in Black, walking on a road through the stars, his
back turned to the viewer. As he walks a ghostly image
appears to his right, walking with him: a painfully
beautiful woman in a blue-green gown, fit for a ball in a
palace somewhere. The apparition reaches for him, but he
doesn't seem to see her.
*/
Broken mirror, a million shades of light
The old echo fades away
But just you and I
Can find the answer
And then we can run to the end of the world
We can run to the end of the world
/*
The image shatters, replaced by the Senshi, in civilian
forms all resting on a hillside in the sunshine. It's a
beautiful day out.
*/
Cold fire clenched to my heart
In the blue of night
Torn by this pain, I paint your name in sound
And the girl of the dawn, with eyes of blue, and Angel Wings
The songs of the season are her only crown
/*
A little girl in a white dress, with long, blonde hair,
playing with the Man in Black under a silver-leaved tree.
He pulls a rabbit out of the sleeve of his coat and gives it
to the little girl, who hugs the rabbit and then the Man in
Black. The camera specifically stays away from the man's
face.
*/
Broken mirror, a million shades of light
The old echo fades away
But just you and I
Can find the answer
And then we can run to the end of the world
We can run to the end of the world
/*
The image shatters, replaced by the Senshi, in civilian
forms all resting on a hillside in the sunshine. It's a
beautiful day out.
*/
We met in the mist of morning
And parted deep in the night
Broken sword and shield, and tears that never fall
But run through the heart
Washed away by the darkest water
The world is peaceful and still
/*
Princess Serenity and the Man in Black standing at opposite
sides of a ballroom, Serenity rushes up to hug him and he
smiles (only the lower part of his face is visible). He
kisses her forehead, on the birthmark and walks out, the
cloak he had been wearing turning into the trenchcoat he
wears in the modern day.
*/
Broken mirror, a million shades of light
The old echo fades away
But just you and I
Can find the answer
And then we can run to the end of the world
We can run to the end... of the world
Run to the end... of the world....
/*
Eternal Sailor Moon looks up at the viewer from below and
smiles. The scene pulls away from a first-person view to
reveal the Man in Black as the viewer of the scene. He hugs
Sailor Moon and kisses her on the birthmark, duplicating the
gesture in the past.
*/
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Next Time on Legacy...
Usagi says, "Next time on Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon..."
Ami peers at her computer in surprise. "These readings are just
like Sailor Moon's.. but.." she runs a few more tests. "Mars'?" She
sighs in frustration. "It makes no sense!"
A silver-haired man chuckles. "Ah.. Nerima.. I've heard a lot
about this place..." He pulls a device out of his coat and starts
taking readings. "Fascinating...." he murmurs.
Usagi continues, "The Senshi come together to plan for this new
menace, and the appearance of the mysterious Man in Black. Who is he,
what does he want, and more importantly, what does he know? Tune in
next time for Episode 2: The Iron Sorcerer."
The Man in Black murmurs, "The Moon carries the Voice of Memory."
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ jrandom@ufl.edu
--
- Berk' Watkins, Student of Quantum Bogodynamics
It's 1999, do you know where your .plan is?