============
PART XVIII
Back to Reality.
============

Mihoshi glanced around the tent as faint sunlight filtered through the canvas. *Where's Ukyo...?* she wondered curiously,
sitting up and stretching. *Surely she can't be awake already - it's just dawn!* She shrugged and pulled her clothes on. It
wasn't important. Maybe she'd gone down to the beach or something for an early morning swim. Maybe she'd join her. Mihoshi
grinned and left the tent, and wandered across the camp. And stopped when she noticed the two figures curled up by the
boulder.

Ukyo yawned sleepily and refused to take notice of the tapping on her shoulder. *I'm sleeping... push off,* she mumbled in
her mind. Her mouth gave up trying to form the words. The tapping stopped. Ukyo was glad. She didn't want to be woken up, she
was perfectly comfortable where she was, Thank you _Very_ much.
After a few moments, she realised she was now being gently shaken. She groggily creaked an eyelid open, then shut it again.
"G'way."
Finally, the person attempting to wake her up got pissed off and slapped her lightly. "What?!" she grumbled, exasperated.
"Ssh." Mihoshi smiled lightly. "Don't want to wake him up, he's cute when he's asleep."
Ukyo blinked a few times, then smiled faintly when she finally worked out who Mihoshi was talking about. "Uh... look, I can
explain, really..."
Mihoshi smiled brightly. "It's OK. I understand." She paused, her smile changing slightly. "I see we reached an understanding
last night - I scratch your back, you stick a knife in mine." She picked up a metal tent pole and wandered off. "Don't go
anywhere," she bubbled brightly over her shoulder.
Ukyo frowned. *What's she up to?*
She quickly found out. Mihoshi skipped over to Ranma's tent and swung the tent pole she was carrying so it connected solidly
with the centre pole. "Hey! Wake up! Check out the hot new couple!"
Ukyo's eyes widened. "Stop that!" She twisted around and tried to wake Ryoga up. "Wake up you stupid jackass!" *I can't let
Ranchan see me like this - he'll never let me hear the end of it!*
As Hiroshi, Daisuke and Ranma began to emerge from their tent, Mihoshi bounced over to the next tent. "Yoo Hoo! Wake up!" 
Ukyo panicked. She only knew one way to wake Ryoga up and he hated it. "I'm sorry," she whispered, before picking up the
sleeping boy and throwing him into the ocean.

One minute Ryoga was happily dreaming that he was getting married to Sailor Mars, (long dark hair, short sailor suit and a
job away from home - what could be more perfect?) the next, he hit water. This was unusual. Usually water hit him, not the
other way around. 
As usual, the contact of the icy cold water on his - now her skin made her gasp for breath. This was a bad thing today as she
discovered she was, in fact, underwater. The salt water made her retch and she inhaled another mouthful of the foul-tasting
water. She started to panic as her trousers began to weigh her down and she tried frantically to claw for the surface as her
body continued to betray her and forced her to cough.
Finally, she broke the surface and stumbled to the shore where she collapsed, sobbing and coughing up salt water. 
"Ryoga! Are you all right?!"
Ryoga-chan looked up Ranma. "I-I-I'm f-f-fi *coff* ine, R-R-R-Ranma, c-cou *coff*coff* couldn't be b-better..." she said
weakly, through chattering teeth. She hardly noticed as somebody - probably Washu, she suspected - wrapped a blanket around
her and began to lead her up the beach. She stumbled a few times, so Ranma picked her up and began to carry her. Ryoga-chan
was mortified. "P-put m-m-me down, S-Sa *coff* Saotome, or I-I'll b-b-break *coff*coff*coff* e-every *coff* b-bone in your
b-body!" she quietly threatened.
Ranma ignored her. "What did you do to make Ucchan so mad?!" he asked curiously. "Was it about that deal we made last ni-"
"No." Ryoga-chan shook her head. "I-it w-was n-n-nothing to *coff* do with t-that." She scowled. *So Ucchan threw me into the
ocean? Gee, I'll have to remember to thank her for that.*
She saw Ukyo as she was carried back to the camp and her scowl deepened. "Ryoga! Are you all right?!" Ukyo asked in concern.
She glanced at Ranma. "Is it OK if I talk to him alone?"
Ranma shrugged and unceremoniously dumped her on the ground. "Sure."
Ryoga-chan glared at her fiancee some more, before running her fingers through her wet, sandy hair and pulling the damp
blanket tighter round herself. "Well. Thank you _so_ much, Ukyo. And here I thought we'd come to some sort of understanding
last night," she said, acidly. "What did you throw me in the ocean for? I nearly drowned! You couldn't at least've woken me
up first, could you? No, instead you nearly kill me and humiliate me in front of our entire class." 
Ukyo looked at her beseechingly. "I... I'm sorry...."
"Why did you do it?" Ryoga-chan stood up and looked down at her. "Why? A reflex reaction to waking up next to your 'idiot,
jackass fiance?' Are you ashamed to be seen with me? Or did you just think it would be an interesting way to wake me up?"
Ukyo didn't reply and Ryoga-chan scowled. "Violent tomboy. I can't _believe_ I thought you were cute!"
"You thought _I_ was cute?"
"I must have been delirious," she said quickly. "I'm probably catching pneumonia from being continuously doused with cold
water."
"You're not catching pneumonia and you get continuously doused with cold water because you deserve it," Ukyo snapped, anger
starting to overtake guilt.
"And what did I do to deserve it today?" Ryoga-chan crossed her arms and waited for Ukyo to answer. 
"..."
"Haven't got a reason, huh."
"Yes I have!" Ukyo snapped. "I wouldn't throw you into the ocean for no reason!"
"So what's the reason?"
"..... I don't have to tell _you_!!"
Ryoga-chan groaned and gave up. "Fine! Be that way! See if I care! Just don't expect me to be having any more late night
chats with _you_ again, if that's how you're going to react!"
"I said I was sorry! You don't have to get all stroppy about it!"
"I woke up underneath ten feet of salt water! I'll be as stroppy as I want!"
Ukyo scowled. "Fine!!"
"Fi..*achoo!* As if I car...*achoo!*" Ryoga-chan gave up trying to finish the sentence and settled for turning her back on
Ukyo and walking away angrily towards her tent, shivering violently.
"Hibiki!"
Ryoga-chan turned around to see Hiroshi and Daisuke run up to her. "Yeah? What do you..." She trailed off as her nose started
to twitch again. "*ACHOO!* Dammit!" *I have got to get changed!*
"Hibiki, we will get straight to the point," Daisuke panted.
Hiroshi held out a bundle of money. "All this is yours if you stay female for an hour or so."
"You're joking, right?" Ryoga-chan said flatly, pulling an extremely baggy T-shirt over her head, wishing she'd brought a
jumper with her. "Or have you both finally ... *achoo* lost what was left of your tiny little minds?"
"We're serious," Hiroshi said gravely and waved the money slowly. "You want it?"
Ryoga-chan watched the money, her mind working quickly. It was a rather thick wad of bills and it would probably pay off a
sizeable chunk of her debt to Mr Tendo. And she was already a girl, so she didn't have to go through cold water torture
again. Besides, if she said no and changed back into a guy, they'd probably just splash her anyway. And she didn't want that.
On the other hand, there was the question of why these two perverts wanted her to stay female. _ She_ didn't want to stay
female - she was cold and her male side seemed to be more resistant to cold temperatures. Besides, none of her clothes fit
right. Her shoes were too big, her shirts fell off her shoulders and the arms were too long and her trousers always fell
down. 
She sneezed again and sighed. All her clothes were soaked anyway and at least she could make a little money. "OK, thanks for
the money. But why do you want me to stay this way?" she asked, tiredly.
"Because you're so hot...ouch!" Daisuke rubbed his head. "No need to hit me!"
"Pervert."
Hiroshi smiled slyly. "You should put some other clothes on, you know. You'll freeze to death like that." He handed her a
bundle of cloth. "Here. These should fit you."
Ryoga-chan narrowed her eyes and took the clothes from his outstretched hands before disappearing into the tent. She examined
the sleeveless royal blue silk Chinese jumpsuit with a critical eye. Funnily enough it appeared to be the correct size
instead of a size too small and didn't appear to be see-through or anything like that. *I wonder what those two are up
to...?* she thought to herself.
Outside, Hiroshi and Daisuke high-fived. "Perfect! We'll be out of debt with Nabiki in no time!" Daisuke gloated. "Plus, we
get to see Ryoga looking like a real babe for once!!" He paused. "But why are we giving _her_ the photographs to sell? Even
if we sell them at half price, we'll still be making more money than she pays us."
Hiroshi shook his head sternly. "If Nabiki found out we'd been selling photo's behind her back, she'd make our lives a living
hell. Now don't even THINK along those lines again, d'you hear me?!!?"

"If we can get good rates, we may be able to get a tramp steamer to Japan or something," Washu said, tapping away at her
computer. "Do you speak the language here?"
"Bits of it," Ryoga-chan informed her, rubbing her bare arms. "Is it just me, or is it chilly out here?"
"Just you. Put this on," Washu said, holding out a watch-like article.
"What is it?" Ryoga-chan asked cautiously, examining it critically.
"It'll measure different things, pulse, blood pressure, PKE readings and stuff. Perfectly harmless, it's just for research,"
the small scientist reassured her. She grinned cutely. "Don't say I can't do this - I did say that anyone who sneaked out
last night would be tested on, remember?"
"Huh?! But I..."
Washu held out a hand, cutting her off. "I'm a teacher. Nothing escapes my all-seeing eyes!!! Mwahahahahaha!!!!"
"...." Ryoga-chan decided not to pursue the line of conversation any more.
Washu continued to tap away at her computer for a few seconds before speaking again. "You've caught a cold. Put a jumper on
or something or it'll get worse."
"All my clothes are wet," she pointed out. "Anyway, I'll be fine."
"Suit yourself." Washu turned around and raised her voice to speak to the class. "I know you all think this is some kind of
vacation and I hate to break your bubbles but I'm going to have to teach you all a little geography as we go along." She
waited for the moans and grumbles to pass before attempting to speak again. "But I know better than to attempt it before at
least after lunch. If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask me, whether they're about geography, science or how the
hell we're going to get back home. Follow me!"
Ryoga-chan blinked. "Aren't we supposed to be following me?"
"Hey, you kids aren't the only ones who can learn a lesson, you know! We have to get back to Japan now," Washu explained. 
"Oh."
"Now then..." Washu smiled in a motherly way and patted her on the arm. "Hibiki, I know being a teen is difficult. And I know
it must be especially difficult having a curse like yours."
Ryoga-chan blinked and backed away slightly, the sudden subject change making her nervous. "Uh..."
"I know I'm just another teacher to you, but I'm Ryoko's mother and I know all about teenager's problems. You can come to me
anytime you need to talk, you got that?" Ryoga-chan nodded numbly and Washu continued. "There's no sense in bottling things
up - you'll just end up hurting yourself more than you already are. You shouldn't take things out on yourself." 
Ryoga-chan blinked with confusion for a few moments until she noticed Washu's gaze settle upon her arms. "You mean... NO! No,
no, no! I am not crazy! I did NOT do this to myself!" She flushed with embarrassment.
"You mean that's not self inflicted?" Washu looked at the many cuts and scratches that adorned the girl's arms. "'Cause if it
isn't, I hope whoever did it has been arrested!"
Ryoga-chan groaned and held her head in her hands. "It doesn't matter."
After a few more minutes of walking, Ranma inched over towards Ryoga-chan. "Hey. Can I walk with you?"
"What for?" Ryoga-chan muttered.
"I wanted to talk to you, that's all. Can't I talk with my pal?" Ranma tried.
"We're not pals," Ryoga-chan said bluntly. "What do you want to talk to me about?" She paused and sneezed violently. "I guess
I _am_ catching a cold," she said to no-one in particular.
"Why did Ucchan throw you into the ocean?" Ranma queried. The incident had been bugging him all morning now and curiosity had
finally gotten the better of him.
"Curiosity killed the cat, Ranma. And I really don't see why it's any of your business," Ryoga-chan said sourly. She'd been
trying to forget about the awful awakening she'd received. *Just like him to bring what's bothering me back to my attention,*
she thought.
With more force than he'd intended to use, Ranma grabbed hold of the back of Ryoga-chan's collar and twisted the cloth
tightly. "Ucchan is one of my best friends and it's not like her to do something like that without reason. Which means you
musta done something to provoke her!" He shook the girl angrily. "So tell me what you did to her so I can justifiably hurt
you!!"
Ryoga-chan pulled free from Ranma's grip and glared at him. "If I knew what I'd done to make her act like that, I would've
apologised already. The point is, Saotome, that I don't KNOW what I did wrong! She won't tell me!" she hissed, clenching her
fists tightly.
"Well how are you supposed to kiss her if you can't even talk to her?!!" Ranma hissed back, suppressing a giggle as the small
girl turned an alarming shade of red.
"As if I'd want to kiss a tomboy like her anyway! She's not even cute!" Ryoga-chan said venomously pushing images of Ukyo
highlighted by starlight to the very back of her mind. "She's not!"
*CLANG*
Ukyo furiously shook the girl by the collar. "Well, ex-cuuuuuuse me for not being cute! As if I'd ever even WANT to BE kissed
by a cross-dressing pervert like YOU!!" She finished by throwing the girl into the ocean for the second time that day. "Oooh!
He makes me so MAD!!!"
"Y'know, it's rude to listen in on other peoples conversations, Ucchan," Ranma said sternly. *You might hear classified
information!*
Ukyo scowled. "It was difficult to _not_ hear it, the stupid jerk was nearly shouting!"
Meanwhile, Ryoga-chan was dragging herself back up the beach. "...Violent uncute tomboy maniac psycho! Does she have to over
react to every little thing I say???!" she mumbled to herself. She sneezed. "Damn. Now I really _am_ going to catch a cold."
"Looks like that outfit's soaked through," a voice above her said. She raised her head to Hiroshi and Daisuke standing by her
head.
"What do you two want now?" she asked wearily.
Hiroshi blinked. "Why, we were only concerned! If you don't want some dry clothes, we won't bother you anymore," he said,
sounding hurt.
A hand grabbed him by the ankle, almost dislocating it. "Dry clothing. Explain further or I twist," Ryoga-chan said grimly.
A few minutes later, she found herself clad in another Chinese outfit - unfortunately, it was a dress. A short dress. 
"Very nice," Daisuke said approvingly, looking her up and down. "How about giving us a twirl, maybe you could bend over and pick up
that rock for me?"
"I'm a guy," Ryoga-chan said through gritted teeth. "Get a life."
"Just like my old girlfriend," Hiroshi said fondly. "Let's go and rejoin the others now, shall we?"
"Seeing as you two seem to be carrying around an endless supply of clothing in my size, I don't suppose there's any chance
that either of you happens to have a jumper that would fit me?" Ryoga-chan said hopefully as they walked along.
Daisuke shook his head regretfully. "Afraid not. Besides, what do you need one for?"
"I'm cold."
Hiroshi looked amazed. "How can you be cold??! It's forty degrees out here!"

Relative calm settled over the Furinkan group for the next few miles as they followed Washu. (By relative calm I mean minor
fights, small squabbles, little destruction to the surrounding area.) Suddenly the pink-haired woman frowned as she looked
from her map to the surroundings. 
"What appears to be the problem, Miss Washu?" Ayeka asked as she stopped tugging at Ryoko's hair for a moment.
"This can't be right." Washu began tapping at her computer, oblivious to the students.
Akane frowned. Washu hadn't yelled out the customary 'that's Little Washu!' remark - something had to be amiss. She looked
around and shivered. *That's strange - I was warm just a second ago...*
Then the island disappeared into fog.

 "Where on earth are we now?" Tenchi asked.
Washu looked around. "I have no idea. Hey, Hibiki, where are we?"
"You expect me to know???" Ryoga-chan asked, incredulous.
The group looked around their new surroundings. Or, to be more precise, lack of surroundings. All around them was industrial
pink. (Stare at the edge of your computer. It should be that awful beige colour. Imagine being totally surrounded by that
colour. Awful, isn't it? It's things like that which give a perfectly good colour like pink a bad name.)
"Welcome, travellers."
The crowd whipped around to see a small man, not unlike Cherry from Uresei Yatsura standing next to a tall and very beautiful
woman with long black hair and ornate robes. And behind them were a large army of soldiers. It was the small man who had
spoken, and he now spoke again. "My name is Grebes and this is Lady Ibis. We welcome you to the Realm of the Lost Sprits. We
hope you enjoy your time here."
Washu stepped forward and bowed. "Thank you for you welcome, although I regret that we can't stay long. I don't suppose you
know the way to Furinkan high school from here?"
Lady Ibis stepped forward. "Surely you can stay for a short time? I insist that you meet my son, Lord Tinamous." Her tone
showed that she was not used to being disagreed with.
"I'm sorry but we really should be going," Washu said firmly. "Could you please tell us the way out of here?"
"You don't appear to underst..." Grebes began.
Lady Ibis waved her hand. "Silence, Grebes. It never works, anyway. Just do it."
Grebes nodded and threw a large ball over to the group. It exploded, releasing a cloud of gas, which enveloped them. Within
seconds, the entire class had fallen asleep faster than they did during history lectures.
"Pity we always end up doing that," Lady Ibis said casually. "Separate the men from the women and place them with the
others."

Slowly, Ranma creaked his eyes open and looked around. He sat up slowly, rubbing his head and taking in the surroundings. It
was still entirely blue and silver and very comfortable... but there was something else. It was enclosed space, populated by
male figures. He was surrounded entirely by men. *Akane...* he thought suddenly, and scanned the area again. There wasn't a
single female figure to be seen.
Next to him, Tenchi woke up and rubbed his head. "Where are we... where is everyone?"
"I see Gosunkugi, Hiroshi, Daisuke, Ryukyu, Hiro... yep, all the guys from our class are here, but none of the girls," Ranma
observed. "Except for Ryoga... well, he's either gotten himself lost or they think he's one of the girls."
"What?! Mihoshi and Washu and Ayeka and Ryoko aren't here?!" 
"Yep." Tenchi looked around. 
"Are you certain Ayeka and Ryoko aren't here?"
"Sure." Ranma looked solemnly at him. "I'm going to find Akane and the rest of the girls. Are you coming?" 
"We don't have to rescue them yet, do we?" Tenchi pleaded. "I'm sure they're fine... and this is the most peace I've had in weeks!"
Ranma thought about Akane. Then he thought about Akane's mallet/ cooking/ temper and shuddered. "You're right. We don't have
to rescue them yet."

Akane opened her eyes and sat up slowly. "Where... where am I?"
"I see the sleeping beauty awakens," Ryoko said calmly. 
"What is this place?" Akane frowned and scanned the place. Unlike where the boys were being held captive, this room was in
shades of pink and gold, with comfortable cushions and seats to sit on. "Where are all the guys?"
Ryoko's eyes welled up. "I don't know! I can't find Tenchi - this place has neutralised my gems somehow and I can't get out!"
"So you don't have any idea where the guys are?"
Ukyo woke up just in time to catch the end of the question. "What? The guys are missing?!" Akane nodded. "Even Ryoga?" 
"Worried about him? I'm sure he's fine, wherever he is..."
Ukyo scowled. "For starters, I am not worried about that idiot, he can take care of himself and secondly, he was in girl form
when that gas hit us and I thought he'd be here, that's all."
Washu battled her way over to them through the crowds of women and sat down on a cushion. "My computer isn't working and
neither are my links with Ryo-ohki. Wherever we are, it must be on a different plane of existence to be able to do this. I
bet there's also a high level magical barrier too."
"Damn!" Ryoko swore. "How are we supposed to get out?!"
"Ranma will rescue us," Akane said confidently. "He always does."
"First we'd better find the rest of the girls," Washu commanded. "Look around and see if you can find them and come back here
to regroup. We'll work from there."
Soon, Ukyo re-appeared with four girls in tow and Akane with five, including Ryoga-chan. "Ryoga! You're here!" she cried
happily.
"Yeah...." The other girl said cautiously. *Ucchan appears to be happy to see me. What is wrong with this picture?* She
looked down at herself quickly, to make sure she hadn't ended up in Ranma's body again. *Nope. I'm me. But Ucchan is never
happy to see me. Which means... she's either preparing to dish out serious bodily harm to me, or she really is happy to see
me. Nah.... Not bloody likely!!*
"Great! Your brute strength will have us out of here in no time!" she continued cheerfully.
"I'm not sure whether to be relived or insulted," Ryoga-chan said gloomily.
"Just do that breaking point thing and bust us out of here, sugar," Ukyo ordered.
"Can't."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN, CAN'T?!!!!"
Ryoga-chan backed away from the roaring fire oni. "The Bakusai Tenketsu only works on rock and these walls are made of
something else," she squeaked.
"Of all the useless, incompetent idiots..." Ukyo cursed.
"Fine, wait for darling Ranma to save you if I'm not good enough for you," Ryoga-chan snapped and sat down, arms crossed and
a scowl on her face.
Ryoko and Ayeka appeared with the remaining girls. "So, 'Mom,' what do we do now?" Ryoko asked.
"..." Washu began.
Her words were cut off by a loud fanfare and golden doors, which hadn't been there a moment before, opened wide. Lady Ibis
and Grebes entered. "Ladies, you will now be presented to Lord Tinamous," Grebes announced loudly. "Please walk through these
doors in single file." 
"Excuse me, but why are we here?" Ayeka asked politely. 
Lady Ibis sighed. "Was it not explained to you? You wandered into the Realm of the Lost Spirits. Most people who wander into
here usually wander straight back out again without even realising they were here. But since Lord Tinamous turned seventeen
last week, we've been keeping a few people here to be presented as possible bridal candidates."
"Just a few, huh?" Sayuri said, sweatdropping as she looked at the looooooooooong line of women. 
"Where have you hidden Ranma and the others?" Akane demanded.
Lady Ibis blinked. "The males? They are perfectly fine - they will all be returned to their homes when a bride is chosen, as
well as the rejected women," she explained.
"So in other words, all we have to do is present ourselves to this Lord, make a really bad impression on him and we can go
home?" Ryoga-chan spoke up. She jumped to her feet. "Let's go then."

"...Too fat, too old, too tall, too ugly... that one's another 'maybe,' too ugly...." As each girl in question walked past
the young Lord, each one who was singled out as a 'maybe' was pulled aside by Grebes.
"Wow! That Lord's actually kinda cute," Yuka said quietly, from a spot near the end of the queue. 
"Well, I'm responsible for your wellbeing and it's not like you can get your parents's permission," Washu said. "He just
seems to be opting for pretty girls at this point, so if any of us make it through, remember to behave as badly as possible."
She pulled a compact out of mid-air and began applying make-up.
"Miss Washu! What are you doing?!!!" Ayeka hissed in a shocked voice. "We don't _want_ to be chosen!"
"Correction, none of you lot want to get chosen. However, some of you _may_. So I _want_ to get chosen so I can keep an eye
on anyone who does get chosen," Washu pointed out.
"I am _so_ nervous," Ukyo admitted.
Ryoga-chan patted her arm. "Don't worry. If he has the bad luck to choose you, just hit him with that spatula of yours."
"Like this, you JERK?!?!"
*CLANG* 
"Y-yeah... j-just like that... owww" They began to talk in quieter whispers as the line progressed. 
Ukyo sighed. "Ranchan would've saved us all by now," she said gloomily. 
Ryoga-chan shrugged. "What's wrong with this? We get through inspection, we all go home. There. Case closed."
"But some poor girl will still end up engaged to that guy," Ukyo pointed out. "Ranchan would've beaten him up, trashed the
place and saved the day by now if he were here."
"No doubt causing vast amounts of property damage and getting himself noticed and probably engaged to the guy," Ryoga-chan
added, annoyed by all the Ranma referrals.
"Ranchan woul..."
"Oh, please would you shut up about Ranma, already!" Ryoga-chan snarled. "What's the problem - you want _me_ to do something?
Fine, I'll do something!" She grabbed the compact from Washu and examined her reflection critically. "Does anybody have a
hairbrush?"
"What are you doing?" Ukyo asked cautiously.
"I'm going to get myself chosen. Then, when you all get sent home, I'll change myself back and they'll throw me out. See?
Foolproof!"
Lord Tinamous sighed and looked down the line. *Where _is_ she...* He craned his neck to see if there were any others past
the end of the Furinkan group, disappointment clouding his eyes when he saw nobody else. "Too plain," he said boredly as
Sayuri passed him. "Too full of herself," was Ryoko's comment. Ayeka giggled until she heard herself described as "too
pompous." Akane sighed as she stepped forward. *Here goes nothing... another crazy weirdo out for my heart as usual... Ranma,
where are yo...*
"Good god, that one has the figure of a brick!!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!?!?!"
Tinamous calmly side-stepped the very large mallet as it crashed into his throne. "And too violent. I would never marry a
macho chick like her."
Akane blinked. "Are you related to Ranma Saotome, by any chance?"
"No." The Lord waved her away and critically examined the last few girls. "Hmm... maybe..."
*Pick me, pick me!* Ryoga-chan thought grimly as Washu was pulled aside. She stepped forward and placed her best cute-girl
grin on her face, the one that ended up on the newspapers when she got photographed as Magical Girl Ryoko. "Another maybe,"
Tinamous decided aloud. *The resemblance to Yukio-chan is amazing...* He examined the last few girls as Grebes pulled a
gleefully grinning Ryoga-chan aside. "No, no, maybe," he finished as Ukyo walked past.
"What?!" Ryoga-chan jumped forward. *I can't let him try and marry Ucchan - she'd never let me hear the last of it!* "Lord,
sir, you don't want her, she's even more violent than the other one!"
"Hey... you..." Ukyo began with a twitch.
"She only ever cooks one type of food, she wakes you up by soaking you with freezing water, she dresses like a boy and
whenever she gets mad, she hits you with a giant spatula..." 
"LIKE THIS?!?!?!"
*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*
Tinamous laughed. "She's so high-spirited! Yes, a definite maybe, I think," he said as Ukyo peeled her giant spatula from the
unconscious Ryoga-chan. 
"Hey! When I did that, you just called me violent!" Akane called out.
"You _are_ violent, Miss. This young lady is spirited. There is a subtle difference," Tinamous said calmly.
"There is? What is it?" Ryoga-chan muttered. "_I_ always thought she was violent."
"Oh, shut up, you jerk! Who cares what you think?!" Ukyo snapped.
"Look at them, Grebes. They are so much like Yukio-chan. I don't suppose I could have both of them, could I?" He looked at
the old man hopefully.
"I shall have to check with your mother," Grebes said gravely. "But I think you should attempt to acquaint yourself with the
other girls at least, instead of looking for a girl who reminds you of Miss Yukio." He walked away in search of Lady Ibis.
Tinamous clapped his hands. "Ladies, I do apologise for all that you have been through. Feel free to make yourselves
comfortable." He instantly walked over to Ryoga-chan and Ukyo. "And what might your names be?"

"Akane!"
"Ranma!" Akane raced over to him and burst into tears. "He said I was violent and built like a brick..."
Ranma placed his arms around her awkwardly. "I say that to you all the time, but it don't bother you... does it?"
Akane sniffled. "Not really. I'm used to it from you."
"So I take it the Lord didn't want you?" Ranma tried not to let his happiness show.
"No. But he's still got Miss Washu Sensei and Ukyo and Ryoga." She sighed. "With all the boys that seem to chase me, I
thought he'd choose me too."
"I don't know whether to say he's got horrible eyesight or great taste in women."
*WHAM*
"I'm guessing you should've stuck with the first one," Tenchi said, peeling his friend from the floor. 
"Tenchi!"
"Lord Tenchi!"
Tenchi whimpered as he was glomped from either side. 
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Stay tuned..
Member 30 of SSoAGMA, Deadly Everyday Object Weaponary Technique, Dragon Warrior Style
Mousse no miku; Generally dangerous English otaku; Supporter of cliched pairs;
Member of the Chan club; WoS; SCG; COURT; SOotCiP;CotMHW - Launderer of the Robes of Death;
Head Castrator of the Hotnit Feminisation Project; Keeper of the Moneybags for the Hotnit Fan Club;
4th Gen. EOE; Image Consultant For "That Guy"; #WASHU#;AKPReSS, Gen. Div.; SLAP;
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Coming soon to list near you.. the legendary 50 foot sig of Team Chan !