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PART XII
Hubble Bubble
Double Trouble.
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"Hey Ucchan, how about some more of that soup?" 
Ranma gave Ukyo that incredible grin again and she turned away, momentarily flustered. "I-I ah...
yeah, sure thing, Ryoga," she mumbled, rushing out of the room. 
With a little giggle, Ranma turned the radio up a little. This was nice, being fussed over. He
didn't often get a chance to relax, without various people (i.e.: MARTIAL ARTISTS!!!!!!!!!!!)
disturbing the peace. He could really get used to this.... *Stop thinking along those lines. NOW!*
he told himself sternly. No matter how much fun this was, he intended to get his own body back
before either Ukyo or Akane got suspicious. He could try and talk rationally to Ryoga and show him
that if he stopped being so stubborn about letting Ucchan help him, she wasn't as violent with the
spatula. Very hopefully, Ryoga would be able to tell him how to stop Akane getting so fond of
mallet-smashing him. *At the least, after a little time dealing with Akane's cooking, Happosai's
water splashing tendencies, Mr Tendo's weepy fits and my Pop, he probably won't be quite as eager to
fight over Akane.* Not that he liked the dumb tomboy or anything, but with no (OK then, a little)
interference from his ex-fiancees, it would've been nice if he didn't have Ryoga and Kuno to deal
with still. *Not that she knows Ryoga likes - liked her.* He grinned at Ukyo again as she came in,
causing her to blush again. "Thanks, Ucchan. You're a great cook!" 
Ukyo blinked and sent him a suspicious look. "Do you feel well?"
"Can't I compliment my own fiancee once in while?" Ranma replied with another grin. *Careful, don't
want to be _too_ out of character or she'll suspect.*
Ukyo flushed and looked at the floor, unsure of how to respond. However, a god (of some sort) was
smiling down on her. Maybe laughing maniacally at the chaos they were stirring up, but smiling never
the less.
"HIBIKI, PREPARE TO DIE!!!!!!!!"
Ranma side-stepped the dustbin and prepared to attack it. Unfortunately, that was the moment that
the Neriman Aquatransformable Water Law sprung into action.

205: Neriman Aquatransformable Water Law.
1. The worst possible type of water must only strike those Jusenkyo cursed and at the worst possible
times. Preferably at a rate of about 17 miles an hour.
E.g.: It will always rain very suddenly, without warning on a previously very sunny day, just when
persons who are better off not knowing of your cursed form are present. This is nothing to do with
Luck, Fate or Destiny, (who all get annoyed when they're blamed) but was created by the almighty
Takahashi goddess who created many other cosmic laws to upset logic.

Ranma ran forward.
*SPLASH*
Ranma-chan instantly tripped over her ludicrously large trousers and found herself nose first on the
floor. Tsubasa took the moment to, as said, kick 'em while they're down. And that bandaged part
looked very vulnerable.
*WHACK*
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"
Outside, a mother tutted and removed the water pistol from her sons grasp. "How many times have I
told you not to squirt that thing through peoples windows?!!" she scolded angrily.
Ukyo had finally had enough. "TSU...BA...SAAAAA......"
The dustbin turned to her and sprouted a head. Tsubasa grinned. "Ukyo, darling! I've defeated this
hounder, let's go on a date!"
Ukyo flared and reached for her spatula. "He's my FIANCE you idiot!!!!!"
Tsubasa blinked. "Uh oh."
*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*CLANG*
Ukyo ended by sending him flying through the window and into orbit. Then she ran over to
Ranma-chan's side. "Ryoga, are you OK?"
"No," Ranma-chan whimpered. *I want to crawl under a rock and die.*
"What hurts?"
"My pride." She carefully climbed to her knees and sighed. "You didn't have to do that, really." "I
SAVE YOUR ASS AND _THIS_ IS HOW YOU THANK ME?!!!!!" Oops. Ranma-chan backed away hurriedly. "No! Um,
thanks, really! It's just..." *CLANG*

Ryoga looked at the cookie dubiously. It looked relatively normal, but that was hardly any
consolation. Akane fixed him with her best menacing glare. "Eat it, Ranma." The mallet appeared in
her grasp. "Now."
Ryoga sighed. "I'm eating it, I'm eating it." He sniffed it. It _smelled_ normal enough. But this
was Akane who'd cooked it. True, wandering around the world and entering countries with very strange
eating habits had helped him to work up the nerve to eat almost anything that wasn't currently
trying to wriggle off his fork, but she'd created new life forms, for Pete's sake! Even when he'd
lined up all the ingredients in a row! Creatures with glowing eyes and big teeth and a big appetite
to match. And there's nothing quite like giant slug-like creatures chasing around the kitchen to
make you lose your appetite.
"Eat."
"In a moment." Ryoga wondered whether it would hurt more to eat the cookie or let her hit him. He
eyed the cookie again. *A few minutes ago this thing grabbed me by the ankle and tripped me over.*
With that thought in mind, he quickly decided on the latter. *At least Ucchan's cooking never hurts
me. Only her.* He tried to think of a way to refuse the cookie without getting _too_ hurt. It was
difficult. "Uh, Akane?"
"Yes, Ranma?"
*This is going to hurt!* It was that or eat the cookie. "Why don't you try one first?"
*KABLAM*
"RANMA YOU JERK!!!!!" Akane glared after his flying form then started to cry. *I made those just for
you!* A thump from outside yanked her out of her small bout of self pity. "Ryoga?"
Ranma-chan gave a small moan of pain and sat up. "Hi Akane.... Akane!" She jumped to her feet.
"What's the matter?!!"
Akane sniffled. "It's nothing much."
Ranma-chan narrowed her eyes. "Was it R...Ranma?" 
Tears welled up in Akane's eyes again. "He was being nice, but then he was mean about my cooking..."
She buried her head in her hands. "Doesn't he realise I'm cooking for him? Because I care about
him?" She looked up at Ranma-chan. "I just want to be a good wife. Is that too much to ask?"
"I...uh... well, I..." Absently, she toyed with her bandanna. *She cares about me?!! But if Ryoga
can't make her happy as me, what chance do _I_ have?* She paused. *Then again, I didn't really make
much of a difference to Ucchan..." She paused for a while longer. *What am I thinking? He made Akane
cry, now he dies!!!* "Ry...Ranma! Prepare to die!!"
Akane quickly grabbed the back of her shirt. "That's OK Ryoga. Why don't I take you back to Ukyo's
now?" "U-Ucchans?" Ranma-chan began sweating profusely. *But she hates me! She'll beat me up again
and I hurt all over already!* "N-n-no, that's all right. I'll just..."
"Come on." Akane grabbed her by the wrist and dragged the protesting Ranma-chan along the pavement.
"Ukyo will be missing you."
*Yeah. She'll have no-one to target practise on.* Ranma-chan could hardly believe that her best
friend could be so violent to her other sort-of friend. *I guess Ryoga doesn't exaggerate as much as
I thought.* Well, at least Ukyo couldn't bludgeon hi...her here.
*CRASH*
Ranma-chan pushed the large dustbin off herself and kicked it back into orbit with a growl. "Someone
up there really hates me and is laughing right now."
Akane laughed. "Silly."
"AKANE TENDO!! BANDANNAED GIRL!! I WOULD DATE WITH THEE BOTH!!!"
"You could have a point, actually."

Ryoga crash landed outside Ucchans, leaving a small crater in the pavement. *Why do I seem to be
spending my entire day riding the air currents between here and the Tendo Dojo? And when did Akane
become so over-reactive?!!* he grumbled inwardly as he scrambled to his feet. A particular dustbin
slammed into him, knocking him over again, then it climbed to it's feet, (Feet?!!) and wailed, "Fear
not, my darling Ukyo-megami, I'll get rid of this Ryoga person who's been hounding you... oh, hi
Ranma."
"TSUBASA, GET LOST!!!!"
*CLANG*
Ryoga was pleasantly surprised when the rush of air and metallic clang were not followed by a long
headache and a short trip via airmail across Tokyo. Well, they were, but not for him, which was
nice. He was even more pleasantly surprised to have Ukyo drag him back inside the restaurant after
greeting him with a quick hug and not a quick swing of the spatula. (Sensing any underlying paranoia
about the spatula yet?) Then he spotted her red eyes. "Ucchan? Are you all right?"
Ukyo sniffed. "Y-yeah, I'm fine. Hey, Ranchan, wanna okonomiyaki?" she said, quickly changing the
subject. Ryoga frowned. "Tell me what's wrong. Really." Then he remembered he was supposed to be
Ranma, and quickly gave her a (hopefully) convincing grin. "Over okonomiyaki."

Bunny looked at her reflection and burst into tears again. Mina sighed and rubbed her temples.
"Bunny, your hair looks fine."
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!! Darien's never going to look at me agaaaaaaaaain!!!!!" Fresh tears
spouted from the blond girl's eyes.
Luna sighed and pretended she wasn't there. Mina hugged her friend and handed her numerous pieces of
tissue. "Honest, it looks fine..."
The sobs increased in pitch as Bunny buried her head in her arms.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!! I LOOK AWWWWWWFUL!!!!!" 
Raye growled at her. "Bunny, please shut up before I seal your mouth up with a ward."
Mina had a sudden brainwave. "Let's go boywatching!"
"B-but my hair..."
"That way we'll get a second opinion," Mina pointed out. "Maybe even a spare boyfriend."
Bunny smiled slightly. "That Magical Guy Makoto was very cute though."
Mina nodded in agreement. "Next time I meet him, I'm going to have to thank him for saving my life."
"He saved everybody's lives," Raye reminded them in a bored voice. "Honestly, you lot are just boy
mad."
"I just wanna thank him!" Mina protested.
Bunny glanced at her blue haired friend who was sitting nearby. "Hey, Amy, get any info on him?" Amy
nodded. "It's not much info, though. As little as there was of Sailor V." Mina grinned. "Best way to
not get caught." 
Amy ignored her. "Him and his sister, Ryoko, appeared quite recently battling against a new outbreak of
demons in the area of Nerima."
"What's so special about Nerima?" asked Lita, doodling little love hearts around pictures of the
Backstreet Boys, Matt Le Blanc and Magical Guy Makoto that were pasted to her exercise book.
"It has an obnoxiously large martial artist population."

"He's just such a stubborn jackass," Ukyo grumbled to Ryoga, who was fighting to eat all of the
okonomiyaki she was churning out. "I'm only trying to help the guy and he throws it all back at me.
I don't know why I bother sometimes. The jerk just doesn't appreciate me." 
Ryoga managed to clear his mouth long enough to blurt out "that's not true!" before another tower of
okonomiyaki was placed in front of him. *Yikes! How does Ranma eat all of this?!!*
Ranma-chan proved how twenty seconds later when she bounced into the restaurant and wolfed down the
okonomiyaki mountain before getting clouted over the head by Ukyo. "OW!"
"That's Ranchan's, you jackass!" Ukyo yelled, peeling the spatula from her skull. 
"Sorry," Ranma-chan groaned. 
Ryoga nudged her with his foot. "Wimp."
*WHAM*
"STOP PICKING ON RYOGA!!!!" Akane yelled, putting her trusty mallet back into whatever dimensional
pocket it came from. Probably the same place as her cooking, actually. 
Ranma-chan allowed herself a small snigger as Ryoga found himself embedded in the grill until the
metal spatula of doom whacked her over the back of the head. "Don't laugh at Ranchan!" Ukyo growled.
"And go get some hot water or something, you pervert."
"M'not a pervert," Ranma-chan muttered under her breath, heading for the kitchen.
"What did you say?!" Ukyo snarled.
"Nothing!" Ranma-chan scuttled into the kitchen and waited for the kettle to boil. *Argh! I can't
take much more of this! There has to be a way to may Ucchan stop beating me up! She's more violent
than Akane!!!*
A piece of paper on the kitchen counter caught her eye. Curious, Ranma-chan picked it up and scanned
it.
*Congratulations Mr Hibiki, you have won two movie passes. Valid until the end of the month.*
She narrowed her eyes. *I'll bet he was planning to ask Akane.*
*poof*
A small devil appeared on Ranma-chan's shoulder. "You're in Ryoga's body so ask Ucchan to go with
you!"
*poof*
An angel appeared on Ranma-chan's other shoulder. "You shouldn't - it's not yours."
"That has to be one of he most pathetic arguments you've come up with," the little devil snarled.
Then he grinned. "Besides, we're doing lost boy a favour."
"We will be breaking the ice for those two, Ucchan will stop beating him up and they'll be out of me
and Akane's way." He smirked. 
The angel blinked. "You've twisted it. I don't know how you did it, but you twisted it." 
*poof*
*poof*
Ranma-chan grinned and picked up the kettle. *Thank you, voice of inner reasoning!* Pausing only to
run upstairs and grab a new change of clothing, Ranma raced back into the main part of the
restaurant. "Hey, Ucchan?"
"Hmm?" Ukyo spared him a glance.
"Wanna go to the cinema with me tonight?"
Three totally shocked faces started at him until the one belonging to Ukyo managed to stammer out,
"W-wha... you mean, like on a d-date?!"
Ranma grinned. "Yeah. I got free movie passes."
Ukyo attempted thinking. Her brain returned the request with an error message and advised her to
wait a few moments longer before trying again. *Ryoga's asking _me_ on a date? What do I do?!* She
tried to concentrate on the part of her mind screaming 'Ranchan! What about Ranchan?! You love
Ranchan! Say no!' but for some reason it kept getting drowned out by the part saying 'Ranma dumped
you, remember? He's not your fiance, Ryoga is. It's not like you'd be doing anything wrong, and
besides, he's not that bad. It's only one little date...' "Tonight?" she asked, stalling for time.
Ranma nodded. "I thought we could see 'Rush Hour' or something." 
He grinned again, and Ukyo felt her resolve weakening. "R-Rush Hour?"
"Yeah. But we can go see something else if you want to." Suddenly, Ryoga leaned forward, knocking a
glass of water over him. "Hey! I just changed back!"
"Sorry," Ryoga lied. "Let's go boil the kettle again." He dragged Ranma-chan over to the kitchen and
shut the door before whirling around to face her. "What on earth are you doing?!!!" he hissed.
"Waiting for the kettle to boil," Ranma-chan said innocently.
"You know what I mean!" Ryoga glared at her. "I mean this date thing!"
"I'm just asking my fiancee out on a date. Whassa matter, P-Chan?" Ranma-chan teased. "Jealous?"
Ryoga fumed. "I am _not_ jealous! You can keep her for all I care!" He paused and rewound her
statement back through his memory to the beginning. *Asking my fiancee out on a date... I'm Akane's
fiance now...* He turned and walked out of the room with a widening grin on his face. "Akane?"
Akane looked at him. "Yes Ranma?"
Ryoga took a deep breath. "Ra.. Ryoga was just saying how much fun it would be if we double dated
with him and Ucchan tonight. How about it?" *If she say's no, that mean's I have a chance when I get
back into my own body. And if she says yes...* Well if she said yes, he'd _never_ let Ranma have his
body back!
Akane looked at him in total amazement before a smile appeared on her face. "OK, Ranma." She glanced
at Ukyo. "Is that OK with you, Ukyo?"
Ukyo still had a look of shock on her face as she slowly nodded. "Yeah..."
Ranma ran out of the kitchen to Ryoga's side, still clutching the kettle. "What?!! What's going
on?!" 
Ryoga gave him a wide grin and opened his mouth to gloat. "..." 
"Hi there!" Ranma screamed and dropped the kettle on the floor as Skuld popped out of it with a grin. "Sorry
I took so long, Mister Bug Zapper broke down and I had to repai..." She trailed off and looked from Ranma to 
Ryoga then back again. Then, without warning, she grabbed them by the hair and knocked their heads together.
"OW!" Ryoga yelped.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!!!!" Ranma rubbed the back of his head, then stopped as a familiar
pigtail brushed against his hand. "What?"
"Feeling... more yourself?" Skuld asked with a grin. She picked up her long handled mallet from the
floor and tucked it back into it's holder. "Shouldn't happen again."
Ryoga jumped to his feet. "I need a mirror.." he mumbled, looking around before exiting the room.
Ranma and Skuld ran after him to see him gloomily examining his reflection. "Thanks a bunch, Skuld.
You couldn't have waited until tomorrow, could you."
"What's the matter? What's so special about tomorrow?" Skuld was puzzled. 
Ranma sniggered. "He has a date tonight. So do I, actually." He fluttered his fingers at Ryoga.
"Thanks for that."
"RANMA, PREPARE TO DIE!!!" Ryoga jumped to his feet and ran towards Ranma, who merely dodged and
poked him in the side. "OW!" He clutched his side with a groan. He glowered at Ranma. "Well, I'll
let you live for now, but you'd better treat Akane right!"
"Relax. You'll be there too, won't you." Ranma patted him on the back. "Things'll be fine."

Later that evening.
"SPATUL GIRL, I KILL!!!!!"
"SHAMPOO, NO!"
"AKANE TENDO! THE BLUE THUNDER OF FURINKAN HIGH SHALL SMITE THIS FIEND!!!"
*KABLAM*
"SHAMPOO, MY LOVE! RUN TO MY ARMS!!!"
*POW*
"UKYO, I LOVE YOU!"
"GET LOST, TSUBASA!!!!"
Ryoga glared at Ranma. "Things'll be fine, I believe you said."
Ranma glared back. "So I suck at fortune telling."

End Part XII
Final song - Nothing Lasts Forever
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Member 30 of SSoAGMA, Deadly Everyday Object Weaponary Technique, Dragon Warrior Style
Mousse no miku; Generally dangerous English otaku; Supporter of cliched pairs;
Member of the Chan club; WoS; SCG; COURT; SOotCiP;CotMHW - Launderer of the Robes of Death;
Head Castrator of the Hotnit Feminisation Project; Keeper of the Moneybags for the Hotnit Fan Club;
4th Gen. EOE; Image Consultant For "That Guy"; #WASHU#;AKPReSS, Gen. Div.; SLAP;
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