Pokejoint
By C-Dogg

This is a short spamfic. Be warned. It involves drug abuse.

Disclaimer: To the owners of these characters, please don't sue me. I have no 
money. Besides, my lawyer can beat up your lawyer.

My comments are in { }

Inspired by a spam message from a troll in alt.games.nintendo.pokemon, a 
movie, and a comedian.

   "Let's see," said Ash. "Brock and Misty are at the river washing the 
dishes and Pikachu is with him. We're in the middle of the forest and no one 
else is around for miles. Good."
   Ash sat down and leaned back against a tree. He reached into his backpack 
and pulled out a bag filled with a plant, a lighter, and a small piece of 
paper. He unrolled the paper and spread the plant on the paper. He rolled it 
back up and licked it shut. Ash looked around one last time and lit the 
joint. 
   "Ahhhhhh," he said in a relaxed voice. "This is a life." He puffed it a 
few more times. ."Gooooood s#!t."

*   *   *

   "I'm starting to worry about Ash." Misty told Brock.. "Should we have left 
him alone at our camp?"
   Brock smiled at Misty. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you really 
cared about him."
   She blushed. "No!" Misty snapped, trying to hide her feelings. "I'm just 
worried about a friend, that's all. I'll go check on him."
   "He better not be smoking without me!" she thought to herself.
   "Pika pi!" Pikachu shouted, wanting to come along and maybe catch a free 
ride in Misty's chest.
   "Uh, no, Pikachu. You stay here and help Brock." Misty hurried off to 
where their camp.
   "Pi ka," he said dejected.

*   *   *

   "Ash!" Misty shouted.
   "What?" he said, briefly but slightly snapping out of his slow  tone.
   "You said you would wait for me!"
   "Chill, Misty," he said slowly. "I made you another one." He held up a 
second joint.
   "Thanks," she said. She took the joint and pulled a lighter from her 
pocket. "You get the best stuff, Ash," she remarked before she began smoking.
   "Thanks." Ash made another one for himself. "When we get to the next town, 
I'll get some gravity bombs."
   Misty sat down next to him. "What?"
   "You'll see."  

*   *   *

   "All finished, Pikachu!" Brock announced. "Thanks for your help," he said 
sarcastically. Pikachu just waved at him and went back to sleep.
   "Let's go back to camp." Pikachu jumped up, ready to go. Brock put the 
silverware in a large sack and slung it over his shoulder. The two trudged 
back to camp.

*   *   *

   Ash and Misty had now both fallen asleep against the tree, joints still 
burning. Misty had thoughtfully set down an ashtray.
   "Don't they look cute?" Brock asked Pikachu, whom nodded in agreement.
   As they got closer to the two, Brock smelled something afoul in the air. 
He looked down at them and located the source.
   "That better not be what I think it is!" Brock leaned down and picked up a 
joint.  He smacked Misty and Brock in their respective heads to wake them up.
   "What the hell?" Ash asked.
   "Are you two crazy?" Brock yelled, glaring at them. {Not that anyone could 
tell}
   "That's mine!" Misty cried. "Give it back!"
   "This stuff is bad for you!" Brock scolded
   "Why don't you try it and judge for yourself?" Ash suggested.
   Brock looked at the joint he was holding. He shrugged and took a long puff.
   "Don't hold it in too long," Misty warned.
   Brock failed to heed her warning. He began coughing and hacking as if he 
was an old man about to pass a lung. He finaly stopped. A look crossed his 
face that could only be described as pure ecstasy.
   "This IS good," he told them.
   "Told you so," Ash said as he made another joint for a pouting Misty.
   Brock sat down next to Ash and the three friends began  to smoke and talk.
   "Do you ever try anything man-made?" Brock asked Ash.
   "Hell no! That's the stuff that kills you!" he told her.
   Pikachu stared at hem all, not quite comprehending the situation. "Pi ka!" 
he said, holding up a hand.
   "Are you sure you can handle it?" Misty questioned. Pikachu shrugged in 
response. Misty took a huge puff and blew it in the little pokemon's face.
   "Pikachuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!" he remarked. He flopped down on his back. 
Ash handed Pikachu another joint.
   "Pi," he responded as he gratefully took it.
   "To protect the world from devastation!" came a voice from high in the air.
   "To unite all people within our nation!" came another.
   Everyone's favorite bumbling trio jumped down from the trees.
   "To denounce the evils of truth and love." Jessie said.
   "To extend our reach to the stars above." James continued in suit.
   "Hey, it's those Rocket dudes!" Misty yelled.
   "Never interrupt the motto!" Jessie shouted, a knot of tension forming on 
her forehead.
   "Man!" said Brock. "She looks hot!" The four potheads all began laughing.
   "I think they're crazy!" James said.
   "Let's just back away slowly!" Meowth suggested. They all took his advice 
and slowly stepped backwards. When they felt the were at a safe distance, 
they ran.
   "Awww," Ash whined. "We don't get to play today." All four began laughing 
again as we fade to black.

   A very dignified man walks on. "Today's fanfic makes fun of a very 
important problem, drug abuse. The author of this story in no way promotes 
the use of drugs or, however experienced he may seem, does them either."
   A shady figure walks across the screen and snatches the twenty-dollar bill 
protruding from the man's shirt pocket. He shakes his hand and passes a bag 
of weed. He then runs off screen. The embarrassed man puts his hands, along 
with the weed, behind his back.
   "Er, if ever caught with marijuana, remember this important excuse, I have 
glaucoma. Thank you." He walks off screen. "We can edit that out, right?"  
... "What do you mean limited budget?"

The End

<_______(((~~`

Questions? Comments? Flames? E-mail me at
bigc123485@aol.com
Or
c_dogg@my-deja.com