Is anybody reading this?


Bankrobbing Soldiers 
Episode 6: Mecha in the Mall, Hard-Luck Cats 
By C-Dogg 

<Let me start off episode 6 with statement. I have no idea what the Mall of 
America looks like so these descriptions are most likely my own. So before 
anyone e-mails me about this, please remember that. > 
_______________________________ 

Robbing banks by daylight. 
Hiding out by moonlight. 
Getting out of situations that are tight. 
She is the one named Soldier Moon. 

Last time on Bankrobbing Soldiers, the gang ransacked Microsoft HQ and stole 
a matter transporter disk. Agent Shields killed off his fellow DK members. 
Jupiter killed several SWAT team members. Miles Rost also joined the group, 
adding to the total destruction and mayhem. The total crime count is: 

89* counts of murder and/or manslaughter 
4 counts of grand theft auto 
3 counts of destruction of private property 
Numerous counts of destruction of city, state, and federal property, assault 
battery, grand and petty larceny {damn!}. 

Average amount of deaths per episode is 17*. 

************************* 
<This episode begins where the last episode ends. > 

   Darien fell down on top of Miles. "Ouch!" the two yelped. 
   "Make a note, Ami. We transform back into our civilian clothes when we go 
through portals." Makoto said. 
   Miles hopped up, tossing Darien off in the process. "Where are we?" 
   "It appears to be some sort of parking lot," Ami commented. 
   "Well what parking lot is it?" Rei asked. 
   The group turned around and saw a large sign that read "Mall of America." 
   "Yes!" shouted Usagi. "We've hit the jackpot! Loads of cash and plenty of 
places to spend it! Let's go inside!" Usagi ran to mall with the others 
walking behind her. 
   "Usagi! Wait!" Yelled Ami. Unfortunately, Usagi didn't heed Ami's warning 
and ran smack into the locked front doors of the mall. 
   "It's not open yet." 
   "Now you tell me." Usagi slid off of the door and fell to the ground. 
   "The mall opens at 8:00. It was 5:00 when we left." Ami adjusted her 
watch. "The mall doesn't open for another hour." 
   "What will we do until then?" Darien asked. 
   "Let's get something to eat," Makoto suggested. "I'm starving." 
   Usagi jumped up at the thought. "I agree. There's got to be a restaurant 
around here somewhere." She clutched Darien's arm. "Let's go!" 

************************* 
<1 hour later...> 

   "BUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPP!" 
   "Usagi!" Rei yelled. 
   "What?" 
   "God!" Miles pinched his nose. "Were you raised in a barn?" 
   "The group turned the corner to find the entire parking lot nearly full. 
   "This parking lot is huge!" Rei noted. 
   "Complaining won't get the job done," Minako said. "Let's get going." As 
soon as she put one foot forward, a car came flying like a bat out of Hell 
and ran it over. Minako yelled out in pain. The driver honked. 
   "That b@$t@rd!" Minako pulled out her gun. "Take this!" She fired a few 
shots at the car. 
   Everyone was stunned. 
   "Um, Minako?" 
   "What!" 
   "Maybe," Makoto suggested, "we should keep a low profile. No one knows 
we're here. 
   "Whatever," she grumbled. The Group trudged through the parking lot. 
************************* 
<15 minutes later...> 

   As everyone walked through the door, a thought occurred to Darien. 
   "Where are Luna and Artemis?" he asked. Everyone paused. 
   "Uh oh," Ami remarked. "We must have left them in Seattle." 
   Makoto chuckled. "They are going to be so mad at you when if they are 
still alive." 
   "Well, I'll wait them out. Then we'll go back and get them." 
   "What do you mean we?" Rei asked. "I'm not getting scratched to death." 
   Ami looked at the others. Some turned away. Others whistled. Ami sighed 
and into the disappeared into the crowd. 
   Usagi clutched Darien's arm. "Let's go do some shopping." They left. 
Makoto and Miles also walked off together. Only Rei and Minako were left. 
   "You want to buy some music?" Rei offered. 
   "I'd rather swim in the fountain," the blonde girl answered, " but my 
collection does need updating." 
************************* 
Microsoft HQ, Seattle 

   Luna and Artemis crawled out of the rubble. Both cats were very furious. 
   "Ami is going to die!" Luna announced. 
   "Just be glad we're still alive." Artemis told her. "When do you think 
she's coming back to get us?" 
   "What makes you think she'll come back?" 
   "Trust me. She will. Now let's get away from here before what's left of 
the building sets on fire." 
   As if Artemis jinxed the debris, it went up in flames. 
   Ami's going to die!" Luna yelled. 
************************* 
Mall of America, Minnesota 

   "There's a roller coaster here, too?" Usagi shouted with glee. Let's go, 
Darien." 
   Darien sweat dropped. "Are you sure we should?" Darien asked from behind 
the sky-high mountain of boxes he was carrying. "Where are we going o put all 
of these packages?" 
   "At the baggage check." 
   "Maybe we should go see if Ami is okay first." 
   "She's probably holed up in some bookstore. She'll be there for hours." 
   "What if you don't meet the height requirements?" 
   Usagi frowned. Darien peaked through the boxes and smiled when he saw he 
dejected look on her face. Then she perked up, remembering an earlier 
purchase she had made. 
   "Damn," Darien whispered to himself. Usagi pulled a box from the bottom of 
the pile, almost causing the rest to topple. 
   A devilish smile crossed Usagi's face as she opened the box to reveal a 
pair of red platform shoes. "Good thing I bought these," she commented. She 
slipped them on, adding at least four inches to her height. There should be 
no problem now." Darien promptly passed out. 
  

   Ami looked up from the book she was rapidly reading through, partly 
wondering what the loud thump sound was, but more concerned about whether or 
not the clerk was watching her. She had already been thrown out of three 
stores for reading the books without paying by clerks that usually don't do 
such things, but it being a slow day, they had nothing else to do. Ami didn't 
worry or mind since there were 57 different bookstores to visit and this 
particular clerk was asleep. She had plenty of money to spend, but why she 
didn't just buy the books, even she couldn't say. Maybe she enjoyed being 
thrown out. Or Maybe she didn't feel it was necessary to buy one that she'd 
finish reading the next day anyway. Whatever the reason, she stood there 
quietly reading her book. 
  

   Makoto worked her way through the mass of people in the mall carrying a 
few bags, slightly frustrated by the crowd. Miles, also carrying bags, walked 
with her, unfazed by the glut of people. 
   "There are too many people in here," Makoto said to Miles. 
   He shrugged. "It's not that bad. 
   "I swear if this crowd doesn't die down, I'm going to snap." 
   "You mean you haven't already?" 
   Makoto stopped and shot a dirty look at her boyfriend, whom instantly 
regretted making the comment. 
   "Um, you look cute when you're crazy," Miles said with a nervous smile. 
Makoto sighed and continued walking. 
  

   Rei and Minako were in their third music store. Each carried two bags of 
CDs. Minako was sampling some of the available displays while Rei was walking 
through the aisles collecting more CDs. Suddenly there was an outburst from 
the rear of the store. 
   "A ROSE IS STILL A ROSE, AND, BABY GIRL, YOU'RE STILL A FLOWER!" Minako 
sang loudly. Rei walked over to Minako and tapped her on the shoulder. 
   "Minako." 
   "HE CAN LEAVE YOU AND THEN TAKE YOU, MAKE YOU AND THEN BREAK YOU. 
   "Minako!" 
   "BUT, BABY GIRL, YOU HOLD THE POWER!" 
   "MINAKO!" 
   Minako stopped singing and removed the headphones to see the entire store 
staring at the two girls. Music was blaring out of it at a deafening tone. 
Rei stopped the CD player. 
   "What is wrong with you?!" she shouted. "Don't you realize where you are?" 
   Minako shoved another pair of earphones that was hooked up to the same 
display in Rei's face. Rei, against her better judgement put them on. Minako 
put hers back on as well and began to play the music again. 
   Rei looked at the other girl and smiled. She started tapping her foot and 
humming. Suddenly, the two girls broke out into a duet. 
   "A ROSE IS STILL A ROSE, AND, BABY GIRL, YOU'RE STILL A FLOWER. HE CAN 
LEAVE YOU AND THEN TAKE YOU, MAKE YOU AND THEN BREAK YOU, BUT, BABY GIRL, YOU 
HOLD THE POWER!" 
   Then Rei stopped. Minako sang "WHAT I AM IS WHAT I AM!" 
   The two began singing again. At the end of the song, the two stopped to 
realize that the entire store had now surrounded them. They looked around. 
   "You go, girl!" a large woman shouted from the back. The rest of the crowd 
applauded. Minako and Rei politely bowed. 
   The crowd began to chant, " Encore! Encore! Encore! Encore!" 
   Rei and Minako looked at each other and shrugged. They began to sing 
again. 
  

   Ami looked up from her book. "The people here sure are loud." She looked 
around the store. The clerk was still sleeping and a young man about her age 
was slowly creeping down the aisle. She paid him no mind and continued 
reading her book. 
  

   "No! I don't want to go!" Darien wailed as Usagi dragged him by his feet 
to the roller coaster. 
   "Too bad," She told him. She now realized how her mother felt when she 
used to do such things as a child. 
   When they reached the front of the line, Usagi tossed Darien into the car. 
He desperately tried to climb out but Usagi held a tight grip on him. 
   "Attendant!" she called. A young woman came over and tied Darien to the 
seat. 
   "First time?" she asked. Usagi nodded. 
   "He'll be fine." 
   The ride jerked to a start. Darien started crying. As the coaster rose 
into the air, he kept repeating, "I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid. I'm not 
afraid." At the peak of the elevation, the ride paused. 
   "OH GOD!" he shouted. "We're all going to die!" Just as he said that, the 
coaster flew down the hill. Usagi's pigtails flew behind her like a golden 
flag. Darien shouted curses and swears all through the ride. 
  

   Makoto and Miles had stopped for a cup of coffee. Both looked up and 
wondered whom was doing all of that cursing. 
   "What do you think," Makoto began to ask Miles, "would be the easiest way 
to clear out this entire mall?" Miles opened his mouth to answer. "Without a 
bomb." Makoto continued. Miles closed his mouth and thought. 
   "How about firing one of those M-17s that you told me about into the air?" 
he suggested. 
   Makoto smirked. "That's a good idea." 
   "Save it for later," Miles said. "At least until after we eat some ice 
cream." 
   "Okay." 
  

   Minako and Ami finished their third encore. They picked up their bags and 
walked out the store. Outside, the large woman from the store approached 
them. 
   "Hi. I'm looking for back-up singers. If you need jobs, give me a call." 
She handed them each a card. "Bye." 
   "Bye," the girls said together. Rei read her car aloud: 
  
       Aretha Franklin 
       Singer 
       Artista Records 
       (212) 555-0125 
  

************************* 
Animal Shelter, Seattle 

   "Ami is so dead," Luna repeated. 
   "Look, Luna. I don't like being locked up in these cages anymore than you 
do, but it's not Ami's fault. Just be glad we survived the fire." 
   "Artemis." 
   "Yes." 
   "Shut up!" 
   Just then, the door to the back room was kicked open and two shadows 
emerged. 
   One turned on a flashlight. "Let's see if we can find some rare kitties. 
We can sell 'em and make a fortune." 
   "How about those two," said the other thief, pointing to Luna and Artemis. 
   "Perfect. Let's grab 'em." Each thief grabbed one cage and quickly ran out 
of the room. 
   "This is just great," Luna thought. 
************************* 
Mall of America, Minnesota 

   The customer creeping through the isle was now directly behind Ami. She 
heard him turn around. Ami peeked at him through the corner of her eye. The 
young man reached down and grabbed her behind with both hands. Ami gasped and 
turned around. 
   The young man covered his face with his hands to protect himself and cover 
his nosebleed. "Please don't hurt me!" he pleaded. "My friends dared me to do 
it!" He pointed out the door to his friends. The other two boys promptly 
turned around and started whistling. 
   "I won't hurt you," Ami reassured him. 
   The boy dropped his hands. "Really?" 
   "No!" Ami pulled back her fist and decked the boy. A loud crack could be 
heard as her fist made contact with his face. The boy fell back, toppling 
bookshelves like dominoes. The boy now had a new reason for his nose to 
bleed. She then turned toward his friends. 
   In her rage, Ami transformed into Sailor Mercury. She put her hands 
together and concentrated her energy to shoot a large stream of ice at the 
boys. The ice stream completely froze the two in a large block of ice. 
   All of the noise woke the clerk up. She looked around. "I'm not cleaning 
this mess up," she remarked. "I quit." With that she walked out the store. 
   "I've created enough of a mess here," Soldier Mercury said. She used the 
matter transporter and opened up a portal to Seattle. "I hope Luna and 
Artemis are okay." 
  

   The roller coaster came to a stop. An attendant cut Darien's ropes. He 
jumped out of the car and started kissing the ground. 
   "Thank you, God," he said. "Thank you." 
   Usagi stepped out. She bent down to her boyfriend. "That wasn't so bad, 
was it?" 
   "Usagi, promise me you'll never make me go on one of the things again." 
   The girl smirked. She put her hand behind her back and crossed her 
fingers. "I promise." 
  

   Makoto finished the last of her ice cream. "Are you ready?" 
   Miles greedily gobbled down the rest of his. "Yes. But first you should 
wipe that little bit off of your nose. 
   Makoto blushed and wiped her nose off with a napkin. "Thanks." 
   The pair pulled out two M-17 rifles and aimed them in air. "They fired a 
barrage of shots into the skylight, shattering the glass. Many people dove to 
the ground, but most looked to where the bullets came from. 
   Makoto transformed into Soldier Jupiter. "May we have your attention 
please? Everybody get the Hell out now!" The shoppers all evacuated the 
building except for Minako, Rei, Usagi, and Darien. 
   "Makoto," Minako called, "What are you doing?" 
   "I hate crowds." 
   Rei smiled. "It obviously shows. Should we weld the doors shut?" 
   "I don't think anyone will be coming in. Now let's raid this place." 
   Suddenly, red lights began flashing all over the mall. All entrances and 
exits bolted shut. Steel plates covered the windows. "Freeze!" yelled a loud 
voice from a speaker. "The Mall Supreme Security is coming to detain you all! 
Don't move." 
   The rest of the soldiers transformed. "It looks like the raid will have to 
wait," Soldier Moon said. 
   The sound of patterned stomping boots became more and more audible. 
Security guards in black and white marched in carrying clubs. They stopped 
and stared down at Soldiers. The Soldiers stared back. 
   "Are these clowns for real?" Darien asked. 
   "You're under arrest!" shouted one guard. 
   The Soldiers pulled out their weapons and started blowing away the guards. 
The largely under armed guards began to fall like flies. 
   "This is too easy," Miles commented. They all stopped firing when all of 
the guards appeared to be dead. 
   One severely wounded one managed to pull out his walkie-talkie. "We've... 
suffered... major casualties... employ... stage... two." The man dropped his 
walkie-talkie and died. 
   A voice came through from the other end. "Employing stage two. Over." 
   The bottom floor opened up. From the depths rose a large red and white 
mecha. 
"Prepare to meet your end!" shouted a booming robotic voice. 
   A portal opened up. Soldier Mercury walked through it with Artemis and 
Luna. Mercury tripped and the matter transporter flew through air, landing in 
the fountain. It began to pulse with electricity. Then the portal closed. 
   "Oh Damn," she said. 
  
To be continued...