Ok, this is the first time in a VERY long time that I've posted a story to the 'net. First of all, standard disclaimers apply, I dont own any of the characters for either BGC or AMG! Dont sue me, the only thing you could get from me is blood, I dont have any money to spare. Second, this story does have some "foul" language in it, and in later parts it has some sexual innuendo involved. While I could ask for pre readers I'd rather just face the music from the whole list, keeps me from chickening out and not posting the story to the FFML.
If the format is off, forgive me, if anyone knows a safe way to get the format looking good, please respond privately. Im using Outlook Express 5.0 and letting it do autowrap for me. The font is Times New Roman at 12 DPI.
Oh yes, mustnt forget, this story is written by both Kuros(me) and Kain The Seeker. Email about any problems, comments or flames should be sent to me. I dont want to flood Kain's mailbox with flame mail or the like. Im the one who did most of the work, and he just revised sections of it and cleaned it up for me(wouldnt be half as good without his help though). If any typos exist, please forgive, there are bound to be several that escape both a spellchecker and a personal read through. Any and all typos found, please respond privately. No need to fill up the list with such comments.
So, without further ado, on with the show.
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BubbleGum Crisis: Interesting Times
He sat there drinking, he'd already finished off the first six pack when there was a knock at the door. He didnt give a shit who it was, "Go away!" The knock was louder this time, they werent going to take no for an answer so he got up and opened the door. It was his best friend, Koji, and he was his chipper self. He grunted and walked away from the door, if Koji wanted in only God could stop him.
He growled a bit as he slumped on the couch, "Give me one good reason I shouldnt let Fifi eat you." Koji grinned, held up two bags, "Anime and more beer! Reasons enough?" He grunted, "Sit." Koji sat down across from him, looking very serious, "I heard what happened." He just grunted again and Koji continued, looking more his usual self, "Thats why I'm here, to help cheer you up a bit." He nodded, not really wanting to be cheered up, but Koji was impossible to ignore. "Cheerful people must die." he grumbled as he took a can and shoved a tape into the machine.
After three tapes and several packs of beer his tongue was getting very loose. "It was inevitable that she'd dump me. She was always giving me hell about not pushing myself hard enough, not going for the gusto, just letting life move on by. Its the way I live, day by day, she wasnt happy with it so she left me."
Koji just nodded, he'd had almost a pack more and he finally stumbled off to go worship the porcelain god. That left him alone with his thoughts, beer and anime. His stomach grumbled and he decided to add food to that mix. He walked into the kitchen, took out a pot, filled it with water and
then set it to heat while he looked for the rest of the food.
He was busy fixing the food when he heard the phone ring, he muttered and staggered out to the phone. He picked it up, fumbling the phone twice, "Hello?" The voice on the other end was female, young, and rather cute sounding, "You needed some help? I'll be there shortly." He nodded dumbly, "Ok." and then hung up the phone.
He walked back into the kitchen remembering that he was cooking some food in there. He got out the spices, everything, surprisingly not making too much of a mess despite the fact that he'd had about a case of beer this evening. He finally got the ramen out of the package after a bit of a
fight with it. He looked at the water, it was boiling, so the food was now ready to fix. He went to dump the ramen in when he swore he saw a pair of eyes looking back at him.
He shook his head, he was seeing things. He closed his eyes, rubbed them and opened them. He was definitely drunk, a young girl had just appeared in his kitchen. He didnt bat an eye at it and dropped the ramen in the water and walked back out into the living room to wait for it to cook.
He heard her voice as he sat down, somehow he recognized it as the same voice that had called just minutes ago, "No screams, no yells, no freaking out?" He shook his head, "Why bother? I have a case of beer in me, I couldnt freak if I wanted to."
He looked her over, "You know, you're a cute kid. You'll make some guy happy when you get older. You gotta learn that not all men are pushy and aggressive. Like my ex girlfriend, she thought I was lazy, not a bit of aggression in me."
"What ..." she sat down beside him, "What would you do about it if you could make any one wish ..." He chuckled, "I'd screw it up, just like I seem to have screwed up a lot of my life." He stood up, walked around, seeming to have too much energy, "No. I know what I'd do, I know exactly what I'd do. I'd wish to be someone special, someone important, someone that matters ... like the folks on tv there." He waved his hand off in the direction of the tv.
Skuld looked around the room, taking in the papers still settling to the floor, the overturned furniture and the now blown out tv. Her gaze finally settled on the scorched tape case on the floor, "Oh ... my ..."
Koji walked in, having caught the tail end of what happened, and having seen his best friend vanish. Then he saw her, Skuld, goddess of the future standing there in the living room. He knew that either the universe was a whole lot weirder than he thought it was or he was so wasted that he was
seeing things. He staggered away, hoping the living room was just a mess in the morning.
"What's the problem, munchkin." Urd said with a smile as Skuld pounded her head on the terminal's keyboard.
Skuld groaned, "Bug in the system, when he made he wish, the whole interpertation system crashed."
Urd frowned, "SO?"
Skuld sighed, "So ... he got a very literal interpretation of his wish." she looked down, "He wanted to be the person on tv, or that is how the system saw it ... so ..."
Urd frowned again, "Just Who did he become ..."
Skuld didn't reply but keyed up the dispay and showed the image that was playing the second that the wish was made.
Urd looked at it for long seconds.
"Oh ... my ..."
The doctor sighed as he looked at the body as it was covered up, "Im sorry Miss Stingray, the damage done was too severe. If we'd gotten her even five minutes sooner we might have been able to save her." Sylia nodded, a tear rolling down her cheek unbidden, "I ... I understand doctor. You
did your best."
After the two of them left, a small globe formed in the air, slowly gaining radiance as it coasted down from the ceiling and gently landed on the still form. For a moment the room was filled with the raident glow of a small star, then the light faded as the globe vanished into the body.
"I can't tell you how sorry I am ... " the doctor's voice droned to a halt as he looked past Sylia into the room. "Nurse! I need a trauma team back in here, Stat!" he yelled as he ran back into the room. Sylia turned and for the first time in her life believed in miracles as she saw that Nene had begun to move once more.
He opened his eyes and knew that he hadnt fallen asleep or anything in his house. The cold air and the smell of antiseptics told him that he was in the hospital, he didnt think he'd drank THAT much. Maybe it was the fuzziness of the drugs, but everything felt ... bigger, he shrugged, as well as he could through the restraints, and then went back to sleep.
"Your wish was granted ..." He opened his eyes and glanced up, "You ..." he stopped, his voice was now much higher and had a weird accent. "You werent kidding, I got a wish. This WASNT what I asked for."
The small girl looked down at the floor, rather embarrassed, "Actually it was, the Ultimate force interpreted your wish as you wanted to be THE person on the TV at the moment of the wish ... So ..." She gathered her breath, "You're Nene Romanova, Police Dispacter, the youngest Knight Saber." He frowned, "What happened to the original Nene?"
"Here, in this world, she died." Skuld sighed as she sat down on the bed. "Boomer crushed her hardsuit, she bled to death before the others could get her to safety, the Ultimate force brought her body back and put you in it after her soul crossed over."
He blinked several times, then sighed, "Great. So this Ultimate force grants my wish in a perverse way. Is there any way to undo this wish?"
Skuld frowned, "It was perverse. And malicous. Just a little literal. No, the wish can't be undone. Unless someone else makes a wish to undo it ... but I dont think that would work to well either ... the ultimate force works to keep the wish in force" She smiled rather shakily. "Two opposing
wishes like that would be very bad for the system."
He was very confused, "The system? You talk about this force like its a computer or something."
"It is, the Almighty uses it to keep things going, but every now and then" she cleared her throat. "Bugs pop up, when you made your wish the interpretation routines crashed, thus you got the literal wish and not something similar, like being a new character. That's why I'm here, to help you adjust."
Skuld leaned forward and placed a dot on his forehead. "This will get you through the next few days, till you can be discharged, help you assimulate some of Nene's core skills and such, I will be back by then to help you ... I'm ... I'm truly sorry."
The second the dot touched his head he felt himself go numb and everything faded to black. He opened his eyes again and saw that he was in what looked like a small apartment.
"It wasnt a dream, this is real. Im a red headed female vigilante. I cant believe this, this is impossible, thats it, Im insane and I've been locked up. Easier to accept than this being real ... easier ..." Then he heard a female voice, "You arent insane, my dear. You are indeed Nene Romanova, youngest member of the Knight Sabers, and most definitely female."
SHE looked up in shock.
"Hey pretty. I'm Urd. You going to yell, let me know. I'll tune all the neighbors out." She nodded, still trying to cope with what was happening, "Let me guess, Skuld sent you, right?"
She looked around the place, not waiting for an answer, "So Im stuck here." She got up and began pacing, looking around, and then turned and looked at her, "I am STUCK HERE!" Urd nodded, "Yes, you are. You should ... " she cut her off, silencing her with a glare. "Stuck here because some god be damned computer fucked up and gave me a literal interpretation of a drunken wish! What kind of goddesses are you?!"
She sighed, "We arent perfect ones." He looked at her and yelled, "You are god damned right you arent! You're pretty lousy ones!" Then she grimaced, "Damn! I shouldnt have said that. Im sorry. Its just, this ... " she looked around, "Its so hard to take."
She collapsed on the bed, her head in her hands, "I never asked for this. Is there anything wrong with wanting to be someone special, someone that means something?" Urd walked over to bed and sat down beside her. "I won't cry." she wailed as Urd held her. Urd just held her, "Its ok, just let it
go, let it all go."
She opened her eyes, having been woken up by a knocking at the door. "Sheesh, I just want to sleep." She whined to herself as she shuffled to the door, a robe half wrapped around her "God, is there one place I don't hurt?" She opened the door.
"Surprise!" someone yelled as she was engulfed and then wisked off her feet. "Hey!" she screeched as her assailants ran with her into the den of her small appartment and plopped her down. Before she could move she was ensconced in a pile of pillows and a blanket. Dozens of faces flashed by
as gift after gift was piled up by her.
She let out a pitiful yelp, only to have several more presents piled on her. Finally the torrent stopped and she was able to make some breathing room for herself on the couch.
"Relax, Nene." Urd drawled from beside her. Her head flicked back and forth between Urd and the crowd of faces as Leon and Daley walked up and began looking for a place to set down a tray of food.
"Urd, what's going on?" she whispered. "Relax, just showing you that it's not all bad, go with the flow."
"Hey Nene, we figured we stop by and show you we missed you ..." Daley said as he continued to look for a place to set down a tray he had in hand, "The Doc here said you were well enough to see us."
"Yeah, so quit lazing about and get back to work soon." Leon said with a smile, before a bunch of arms reached over and pulled him away for a mock thrashing. "Huh?" she looked around confused.
"Don't worry, I'm Daley Wong and the lout being pounded over there is Leon McNichol. You work with us. Don't worry, the doc told us that you might have a little problem remembering at first. So everyone came by to reintroduce themselves to you."
She sat in shock as one after another came and gave her a gift and then introduced themselves. Before she knew it she was sitting in a room full of gifts. Daley finally found a spot to set that tray of food down, "I don't like any of this..." she started, only to be elbowed lightly by Urd, "Sure you do, or rather your body does. " Urd explained. "Think of it as a reflex, the body knows what it likes."
She frowned, "So that's another thing I get to have no choice in?" Urd smiled, "Just think of it as additional likes and dislikes, you've got to stop thinking of this as all bad. You've got a lot of friends here."
"So, you and them are both starting over, try it out okay?"
She leaned aback and stared at the ceiling for a minute or so. It was hard to stay negative in the presence of someone like Urd. -Thank god Skuld isn't here, she would be even harder to ignore-
She finally relented and began eating the food that Daley brought her, and was quite surprised that she liked it. She smiled at Daley, "Thanks, its good, quite good. Who'd you bribe to make it?" Daley held his hands over his heart, in mock pain, "You wound me! To say I cannot cook!" Someone yelled, "But its true!" The laughter rang throughout the apartment, and somehow it made her relax.
She continued eating, enjoying the mood, relaxing a bit despite herself. She even began laughing at some jokes, by the time they left she was quite happy, tired, but quite happy. She looked around, "You know, this might not be so bad after all. Its not the life of Riley, but its better than my old
life, much better."
Then her eyes caught the stuffed animals, "No, cant get rid of those, might bring up too many questions. The music is another issue, idol singers, I hoped they would have died out by now. Well, I guess some evils will hang around forever. This world probably still has telemarketers, some evils
cant be purged, now can they?" She got up, stretching a bit, "Time to clean this place up, dont want the others to think I'm a slob or something."
After several hours she got hte place cleaned up, having stopped to rest on many occassions, she was still quite weak. The silence was almost enough to drive her insane, "Lovely, I couldnt wait for them to leave and now I want some company." She'd barely sat down when there was a knock at the door, she grunted as she got up, "Sometimes I wish I'd just keep my mouth shut."
She looked out the peephole, it was Linna, and only Linna, she didnt see any harm in talking with her, she could always feign exhaustion. She opened the door, "Come on in, excuse the mess, the guys from the department ... " Linna smiled as she came in, "No prob. Your health is whats important. Thats why I borrowed Priss and we're ... " her eyes finally took in the look of the place.
Nene turned and looked at the apartment, "Yeah, quite a few gifts. Didnt know that many at the department actually knew who I was. Come on, I need some fresh air, lets go somewhere. I can sort all that when I get back." Linna nodded, finally over the shock at the sheer number of gifts that
were scattered about the apartment.
Thanks to the fact that linna was in a talkative mood she was able to piece together things that Urd and Skuld hadnt told her about the current situation. Her memory of this world was both fuzzy and exact, she'd only watched the series once, so it wasnt like she was a die hard fan of it or anything. The exact bits came from that little dot thingy that Skuld had used to help her retrieve the core skills that belonged to Nene. By the time they were done shopping she was glad that it was Linna and not Priss who'd dropped by, she needed a calm and understanding voice to listen to.
She finally got home, feigning exhaustion, but not by much, everything that happened HAD taken its toll on her. She lay there, just relaxing and pondering how life had definitely become very ... interesting.
Koji looked around the living room, the melted tv, the works, even seeing it was hard to take. Believing that goddesses right out of anime existed was something that could get him put in the funny ward. He sighed as he sat down, "Life was normal for both of us, why did this have to happen?" He picked up one of the melted tapes, "Well my old friend, to quote the old chinese proverb, 'May you live in interesting times.' I sure do."