Hey Gary,

I enjoyed this first round, though I fear I don't have time
to go over it word by word as I'd like.  A very entertaining
concept (and not just because I think Ranma-chan 
would look pretty cute in that outfit... er, forget I said
that).  Definitely built for humor, not moody drama... I
think you could have a really good time with this one.

It will be interesting to see who does and doesn't find
out about Ranma's wish power.  The Kuno pair have
shown a great immunity to understanding, so I expect
they'll remain in the dark.  But everyone else...

It gives you a chance to kind of go over the top on what
seems to be a very popular fanfic convention:  "What if
(pick a character) was granted a wish (three wishes, so
forth)?"  How do the given characters react when they
can use this power, once they understand it?  Gives you
a nice chance to balance each individual's honor and
scruples against their desires and ambitions.

With, of course, the inevitable wish backfires.

Akane, for instance, is someone who seems perfectly
willing to lash out and use a person's curse against 
them when she's irritated, so I expect she'll feel the
same way about the wishes.  On the other hand, she
might end up spending a lot of her time using counter-
wishes (or hot water) to negate the more extreme 
wishes of the other characters, thus protecting Ranma
(who may not appreciate that too much...). Nabiki 
obviously sees profit potential, but if the wishes 
keep showing a high backfire factor, she might back 
away.  So forth and so on.

And Ranma is oddly helpless in the midst of all this.
This aspect of the story is perhaps the most intriguing -
Ranma has to deal with being buffeted around and 
used against his will by anybody who knows of his
curse.  A rough situation for the pig-tailed lad.

One thing you might have already considered to 
empower Ranma a little bit is that he may begin to
discover he has a choice about HOW a wish gets
answered.  If he realizes that he can affect the
outcome of the wish based on the wording, even
to the point of "Monkey's Paw" style fulfillment, it
gives him some leverage.  After all, he's dealing
with some pretty careless speakers on the whole...
and assuredly there will be no end to the people
who casually mutter "I wish (x) would happen!" in
his presence.

I do have one complaint though.  Perhaps I'm the
only one who feels this way.  But I consider it to 
be a cruel, terrible thing to pick a story title which
deliberately invokes the memory of an old TV 
sitcom theme song, which then LODGES itself
in the forefront of your BRAIN and plays over and
over and OVER and OVER all day until you just
want to SCREAM!  AAAAARRGGHHH!!!

ahem<

Excuse me.  Anyway, I might humbly suggest
changing the title.  Perhaps to "Friend Like Me," 
which invokes a different but altogether more
palatable (to me, anyway) genie-based song.
Take it for what it's worth.


Later,

Grayson Towler
grayson@rigroup.net

http://www.rigroup.com/~grayson/relentless