I'm taking a tiny-tiny break from writting chapter 5 of "Sibling Rivalry", 
just to bring you this little diddy.  You see, I was thinking.. perhaps I 
should start living up to my screen name: "Evil-Kasumi" So, with that said, 
I got the help of my little sis I wrote up this spamfic for you're very own 
torture! :)  Well.. least I'm considering it a spamfic.. it went from spoof 
to dark then back to spoof again!
Characters portrayed are sort'ov off Cannon.. so... Oh Well.

Ranma 1/2, and characters involved, are property of the genius that is 
Takahashi-sama (We're not worthy of your greatness!)

C&C deeply appreciated, and Flames encouraged!
If you didn't like it.. the blame goes to my sis, if you did.. the glory's 
mine! :)

Perhaps I should start running........ now?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad Service

by Buh-Ba and LizMUN

	Two travelers were walking through the mist-covered lands.  Neither one 
were natives of the area, but both traveled onward, seeking their 
destination.  A land full of sorcery and legend, desires and damnation.  
They seek.. the cursed springs of Jusenkyou!
	One of the travelers stop.  He is tall and has an elegant flow within his 
movements.  His unruly brown hair cover half of his eyes, and his garb is 
fitting for those in a Samuri movie.  The bokken doesn't hurt the image at 
all.  He lifts up a main portion of his bangs, and looks around, trying to 
see past the mists.  Unable to do so, he looks over at his companion, a 
dimminuative man with a cat-like face, including wiskers.  His garb is more 
ninja-like, and carries no weapon, but rather a oversized back-pack.
	"Sasuke.  Refresh my memory. Why is someone, such as I, Kuno Tatewaki, Blue 
Thunder of Furinkan High, of such high noble blood, doing here in this 
forsaken swamp area, when I should be defeating Saotome, and freeing both my 
loves?"
	"But isn't that why we're here, master? It was your own idea to come.  
Something about finding the source of Saotome's magic?"
	"Ah yes! The fair Tendo Nabiki hath told it to my own self.  It was her who 
told me that this.... "Jusenkyou"... was the sorce of Saotome's sorcery! 
Fear not Akane Tendo, Pig-tailed girl!  For once I, Tatewaki Kuno, have 
vanquished this land from it's impurity, you shall be slaves of that vile 
cur no longer, and thus free to date me withing your own free will! 
Ahahahaha!  Lead on, Sasuke!"
	Saskuke nods, and walks further.  The mists had yet to clear up, so after a 
few steps, he was no longer in sight.  Kuno looks around.
	"SASUKE! Come forth!....... SA-SU-KEEEE! Where is that..."
	"MASTEERRRRR...... *SPLASH*"
	The mists, begin to clear a little.  Tatewaki rushes toward the sound of 
his man-servant.  He stops abruptly, in front of a large puddle.  Something 
was spashing within the water.
	"Sasuke! This is no time for a swim! I order you to remove yourself from 
there!"
	Suddenly, something shoots out from the water, causing Kuno to draw out his 
bokken instintivly.  He looks down at the emerging figure, and steps back, 
feeling the mass aura surrounding the form.
	"S-Sa...  Sasuke?"
	Glowing red eyes are the only thing that respond.
	"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.............*"


	Ryouga Hibiki walked down the side of the road.  Not carring where he was. 
Not like it mattered, "Here" was never "There".  There was never here, it 
always stayed there while he was stuck here. Occasionally, he'd get lucky 
and would reach somewhere, which was close to there, but then, he'd be back 
here again.  Ryouga shook his head, trying to clear out that mumbled mass of 
confusion out of his noggin. Suddenly, he felt the hairs from the back of 
his neck stand upright, tingling.  Someone was watching him.   With 
discretion, he reaches behind his head, and begins to pull out his umbrella. 
  This "feeling" was promising trouble, so he was ready for an attack.
	"Show yourself!"
	Silence.
	"Grrr.. What do you want"
	A chuckle is his only response.
	"Laugh at me? How Dare you! Show yourself coward!"
	A black blur skims in front of him.  Ryouga tightens his grip. Sensing 
something approaching from behind, he turns and swings his weapon, grinning 
as he felt the pressure of an impact.   The chuckle remerges. Ryouga looks 
toward the fallen form.  Not letting his guard down one bit.  He approaches 
the form, cautiously.  It turns to face the "Lost boy", smilling, eyes 
glowing bright red.  Ryouga steps back.
	"Y-y-YOU?!?!"
	*Splash*
	"BWEEE!!"
	The dark figure puts down the used bucket, and picks up the piglet, placing 
it into a canvas sack.
	"Hehehe.  Now... to finish this!"
	And with that, the figure bounds away via roof-tops, heading toward a place 
all to familiar... The Tendo Dojo.

	Akane sat in the back porch of her home, fumming over the past event. She 
had just punted Ranma airborn for his inconsideratness.
	"Ranma no baka! I'll show him who punches like a girl! Hmph"
	Although Akane was a girl, confirming that the above statment was true, she 
considered herself a pretty decent martial artist.  Although she still did 
not reach the level her fellow martial artists of this town had achieved, 
she always managed to get past Ranma's defenses, sending him in a world of 
hurt.  Yet, because of this, her skills were not high enough to pick up ki 
levels within the area.  That was why she was surprised as heck when she 
felt it.  Akane stood up instantly, ready for a fight.  The feeling was 
comming past the wall.... it's comming closer.
	"Mistress Akane!"
	"Oh.. hello Sasuke!"
	The feeling had disapeared, although not totally.  Seeing as it was only 
Kuno's servant, she dropped her battle stance, and sat down again.
	"What brings you here?"
	"You'll see.. If it's not too much to ask, may I have some tea?" He replied 
with a smirk.
	"Huh? Oh.. sure." Akane goes into the kitchen, and brings out a thermos.  
She would have made the tea herself, but last time she did so, the number of 
cups, kettles, and floor boards had deteriated very quickly.  "Here you go." 
she smiled, as she gave the said thermos to the ninja, "Did Kuno kick you 
out again? Is that why you're here?"
	Sasuke only smiled in response.  He then pulls out a sack from out of 
nowhere, and drops the contents onto the ground.  The black piglet shook off 
the stars rotating round his head, and looks around.
	"P-CHAN!"
	P-Chan looks up, and see's Akane right in front of him.  He begins to bound 
toward her, but something blocks his way.  It was him! The one with the bad 
aura.  The servant of that idiot Kuno.   P-chan hunches it's back, looking 
very threatening (-ly cute. �_~) .  Sasuke smiles down upon the piglet, and 
tilts something over it.  Ryouga looks up, and see's the steam.  Fearing for 
what's to happen, he skatters, but it's too late.  The water hits the 
porcine's head, triggering the reversal of the curse.  What was before a 
cute, black-piglet, with a yellow and black bandanna, was now a stark naked 
boy, wearing a yellow and black bandanna.
	"!!!!!!!!" Was Akane's first response.
	Ryouga, humiliated beyond belief, bounds over the Tendo wall, tears 
streaming from his eyes.
	"P-p-P-chan.... Ryouga??"
	Akane was confused beyond belief.  P-chan was Ryouga!? Ryouga was P-Chan!  
Akane was hardly one to freely express her emotions.  So, when something 
like confusion bounds it's way toward her, she directs it toward an emotion 
that's all to familiar with her; ANGER!
	"AAARRGGHH!! DIE!!
	Sasuke chuckled at Akane blazing blue aura.  With a wink and a smirk, he 
fades into the shadows, leaving Akane to schorch anything within a 500 ft. 
radius with her massive aura.

	Ranma was running after Sasuke.  He had seen what the once- humble- ninja- 
turned- mental- nutcase did back in the dojo.
	*He finally snapped from hanging around Kuno and Kodachi too much!  Ryouga 
had it comming, but still, I feel sorry for the poor guy.. hope the jerk's 
all right.*
	Ranma turned a corner, and felt the black-aura nearby.  It knew it was 
following it, perhaps that was why it led him to a dead end.  Ranma turned, 
as he felt the aura from behind.  There, he saw two dark-red eyes, glarring 
back at him.  The eyes moved closer, away from the shadows.  The moonlight 
revealed it to be Sasuke, smilling with a maniacal grin.
	"What's with you, man? Have you gone crazy?"
	"Crazy? No, master Saotome! Evil has no time for madness!" Sasuke replied, 
still grinning.
	"What are you talking about?"
	"Farewell, Master Saotome!"
	Sasuke pulled out a mass amount of shurinkan from his garb.  Ranma, ready 
to dodge, awaits the incomming attack, but it never came.  Sasuke was now 
laying on the ground, pinkie, thumb and index finger extended with both 
hands.  Ranma looks within the shadows, and see's a bokken emerge from the 
darkness.
	"K-KUNO?!?!"

	Akane was still fumming, even more-so.. but was calm enough to be within a 
ten foot radius and not get scorched.  She was glarring holes at Ranma, 
promising a new world of excruciating pain for keeping secrets from her.  
Ranma was as far away from her as physically possible, but still within the 
room.  Kuno was sitting a considerable distance away from Akane, but not as 
far as Ranma.  To his side, lay Sasuke, unconsious, chained, duct-taped, and 
tied inside a canvas sack.
	"Let me guess this straight," began Ranma, "You guys were in Jusenkyou?"
	Kuno crossed his arms, and shut his eyes, nodding. Sasuke, still lay 
unconsious.
	"We were on a quest, to find the cursed springs to rid of your power over 
the Pig (Akane growls)-tailed girl and Akane Tendo, when Sasuke fell into 
one of the cursed springs and...."

	"S-Sa.... Sasuke?"
	The guide, hearing a comotion within the springs, exits from his cabin and 
sighs to himself.  Perhaps it'd be best if he charged admission? There did 
seem to be an increase of visitors as of late.  He approaches the 
funny-dressed man, and looks down into the spring.
	"Oh.. poor customer! He fall into spring of drowned villian!  Tragic tale 
of villian who drown in spring, nine-hundred year ago! Now whoever fall in 
spring become villian of story!"
	"But that spring only three feet deep!"
	"Is why so tragic! Very embarrasing!"
	Sasuke crawled out of the spring, and looks up at his once master.  He 
smiles, eyes glowing red, he crawls, approaching Kuno and.... bites him in 
the calf!
	"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.............*"

	Ranma and Akane picked themselves up from their face-faults.  Akane pounds 
the Kendoist with her mallot, while Ranma uses a chair, sending Kuno into 
temporarly unconsiousness. After a bit of waiting, both Kuno and Sasuke 
awaken from their involuntary slumber.  Ranma, pulls out a kettle from thin 
air, and begins to pour it on the mad-ninja.
	Sasuke blinks, and spins his head around like a sparrow.
	"What? Oh! I'm back! I've had this terrible dream.. You were there, Master 
Kuno, and You, Master Saotome, and You as well, Mistress Akane! Oh there's 
no place like... URK*"
	Akane pulls back her mallot, from the ninja's head, and plops back down.
	Kuno pulls himself up, and grabs the once again unconsious Sasuke by the 
scruff.
	"Fear not, Akane Tendo.. for once I know how to cure this madness from 
Sasuke, shall I vanquish the hold Saotome placed upon you and the Pig-tailed 
girl. Farwell!"
	The two teens watch as the noble kendoists walks out of the front gates, 
and down the road.
	"That jerk'll never figure it out, will he."
	The figure disapears beyond the hill, moments later, a splash is heard 
and...
	"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH.............*"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Evil Kasumi
*~"She's really a very sweet girl.  She's just a violent maniac!"~*

Visit "The Lost Gallery"... that is, if you can find it. �_~
http://rivendell.fortunecity.com/unreal/483/ranma
**The COR's keeper of the Heituenniichuan**


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