*Whap*
"Neigh!"
*Whap*
"Neigh!"
*Whap*
"Nei---"*urk*
*Whap*
"..."
*Whap*
"..."
*Whap*
"..."

Ladies and Gents, quit beating a dead horse.


Look, the issue here is that Canady's made these claims that out of a list
that tops 1000, only a few have responded negatively to what he has said. 
Now, normally, I would not condone this suggestion, but since Mr. Canady
has suggested it himself... 

Read the fic below, which according to his principles, could be canon
Ranma, and needs no lead in.  Then, send *him* a message as to whether you
agree or not.  He can then use this data to formulate his own opinion. 

NO need to send your opinions to me.  NO need to send it to the list,
where EVERYONE can see the replies to this annoying thread.  If you feel
the need to change his mind, leave the rest of us out of it.


The Tale


	'Twas the hour before supper, and Genma was in no mood to miss a
good meal.  However, even his voracious appetite was forgotten as he drew
closer to the Tendo residence, at the sight of Akane spinning around in
circles while on the roof, singing something in English.  He stopped for a
moment, and tried to make out the words.
	"The mountains live with instrumental notes?  That can't be
right..."  He might have waited to hear more, but Akane's spinning had
brought her uncomfortably close to the edge, and she unexpectedly fell off
the side.  Luckly, Genma was there to catch her.  He was about to berate
her, when Akane burst into another song.
	Once again, Genma was confused.  "Akane, what's this about dough
and woodland creatures?"
	"Akane?  No, it's Andrews, my good man.  Julie Andrews!"

				---

	A half an hour, and many sedatives later, Akane was finally
'convinced' to take a break from dancing at high altitudes.  Genma ran
inside to get help for Akane, who he firmly believed had gone mad, and
tripped over the numerous boxes in front of the doorway. 
	"Oi!  Satome-chan!" called Soun.  "You're just in time to help us
pack!  We're moving the Dojo to Mozambique."
	"Tendo!  Why?  Why are you doing this?"
	"Oh, no reason!"
	"No rea...wait a moment?  Where's Ranma?" he asked, his suspicions
raised.
	Ranma walked down the stairs, wearing a dress.  Genma was
instantly enraged.
	"What are you doing, boy..."
	"Don't call her a boy, poop-head!"  This from Nabiki.

	Meanwhile, Kasumi greeted the gentleman formerly known as the
Water-Pail Lady, who was asking for Ranma's hand in marrage.

	Genma ran from the house, desperate to cure his son, all other
concerns pushed to the side.  After all, if Nodoka found out, then Genma
would be in serious trouble.  But what could he do?  Perhaps he could...of
course!  Ranma's other fiancees!  If they were to seduce the boy, then he
would have to stay male!

				---

	It was a brused and battered Genma that finally dragged his way to
the Nekohauten.  He had attempted to see Ukyou earlier, but she was giving
a concert that evening, and Ryouga was acting as her bouncer.  She was in
the midst of singing 'Information High' when Ryouga, when a final cry of
"Shut up!  Where can I get some Tang?" explained that Ukyou was not
available tonight.  With two broken ribs, Genma reluctantly agreed. 

	As Genma entered the Nekohauten, he hearding moaning from
underneath one of the tables.  Peering underneath, he blanched at
Cologne's and Mousse's attire, or rather, their lack of it.

	After hearing Genma's story, Cologne sighed.  "I'm sorry, but
Shampoo has run off with Mouse."

	"But he's right here!" cried Genma.

	"No," Cologne corrected.  "That is Mousse.  I mean Mouse."

	"Now hold on!  Which Mouse do you mean?"

	"Depends.  Do you like Disney, or do you subscribe to the FFIRC
Mailing list?"

	Discussion was suspended when Herb ran inside and seduced
everyone, pursuing his quest to bring love to Nerima.


Notes:

Akane's lyrics-
/o~ The hills are alive, with the sound of music... ~o/
/o~ Do, a deer, a female deer ~o/

Ukyou's song is one of Sharon Apple's

So, who is Mouse?  It's your choice.  Damion, or Mickey?

-Natsume Ranma Ranma
-------
The sardines weren't worth the trouble.  A few more shots, then 
Ryoga-san would overheat and explode.  Ducking around a corner, 
I managed to lose him as I entered the ramshackle residence of 
my Anime supplier.

One look at his face and I knew that I was betrayed.  "Tell me."
I insisted.  He refused, so I slammed him against the wall.
"Last chance.  Where can Ranma-Ranma find good fanfics?"
"Try Jason Liao." he whispered, before he slumped to the floor.
I heard the sounds of a door splintering as I left through the 
window, one step ahead of Tendo Heavy Industries...