Here's Chapter 9 it took a bit longer than I thought. Hopefully
number ten will be out sooner. Crossed Wires will end with that
chapter, although I will be writing a sequel to wrap up a few of the
loose ends.
Earlier parts of the story are being hosted by Kaneda Saotome at
http://www.geocities.com/tokyo/towers/1030/cwires/cw.html. Kaneda has
also offered to act as a prereader along with David Johnston.
Disclaimer: The characters and situations of Ranma 1/2 are owned by
Rumiko Takahashi and are used in this fanfic without permission. That
doesn't really surprise anyone though does it.
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Chapter 9: Night of the Living Gate Crashers
"I'm so glad you could help me shop, Auntie Saotome."
"Think nothing of it. A school dance can be a very important event
and it's nice to see you taking an interest in your appearance." Nodoka
paused and considered the available options. "I think the red dress
would be the best choice."
"But I can barely walk in it, let alone fight." Ranma gestured
at the dress in question. It was deep red, almost crimson, and
strapless as well as form fitting.
"You're exaggerating, dear. You'll just have to take slightly
smaller steps. Besides, I don't think a brawl will erupt at the dance."
"I'll believe that when I see it," Ranma muttered.
"What was that?"
"I said I'll take it."
"Splendid. I'm sure Ryoga will be impressed. I've arranged an
appointment at the beautician's for you on Friday afternoon. You'll
want to be sure you look your best."
Ranma shifted uncomfortably. "You didn't need to go to so much
trouble."
"Nonsense. It's the least I could do after you asked for my
help. Now lets find some shoes to go with that dress."
====================
"Mr. Tendo, you don't need to help me find a tuxedo."
"Ryoga, if you're going to take my niece to a dance you'll have to
look your best."
"You do remember that Ranma isn't really your niece, don't you?"
Soun paused in confusion for a moment. "Now that you mention it, I
had forgotten that. An insignificant detail like that isn't really
important though. I hate to admit it, but you two get along even better
that Ranma and Akane."
Ryoga gulped nervously as he followed Soun. Getting to Jusenkyo
would be more than worth the effort. Anyway, he wasn't the one that had
to wear a dress.
====================
Ranma sat in the warm water of the furo, scrubbing furiously. He
sighed in relief as he felt the familiar transformation come over him.
"Finally must have rubbed enough of the water proof soap off."
He didn't mind pretending to be a girl as much any more, especially
now that a possible solution had become available. In fact, yesterday's
shopping trip had been kind of fun. However, some things were best done
as a guy. Ranma stepped out of the furo and splashed himself with cold
water. It was time to talk to Ryoga about borrowing some clothes.
===================
Walking down the street, Ranma felt vaguely uncomfortable. She
smile ruefully, who would have ever thought that she'd get used to
wearing a bra and panties. Stopping in front of her destination, Ranma
unscrewed the cap of the thermos she was carrying and upended it over
her head. Checking to make sure that Ryoga's clothes now fit him
properly, Ranma stepped through the door.
"Ranchan, you're a guy again!"
"I thought I should change back to talk to you."
"What about?"
"Well uh, I just thought you might have gotten the wrong impression
because I've been spending so much time as a girl."
Ukyo smiled shamefacedly. "I guess I did. But, Akane explained
about your problems with your mother."
"Great! Then you know I'm not really dating Ryoga or anything."
With Ranma in front of her as a guy, Ukyo's continuing suspicions
seemed to silly to consider. "That's right. Say, do you want any
okonomiyaki, Ranma?"
"Sure. Just give me my usual."
Ukyo worked quickly and as she set another culinary masterpieces in
front of Ranma, she decided to broach another subject.
"Ranma, there's something that I have to tell you."
"What is it, Ukyo?" Ranma said, around his first bite.
"I'm not really..."
The door to Ucchan's opened with a crash, and Ranma looked up to
see an unexpected figure.
"Shampoo! What are you doing here?"
"Shampoo come to visit wife."
Ranma choked spitting out a large piece of okonomiyaki.
"Ranma not know? Shampoo now engaged to Ukyo under amazon law."
"H-how did that happen?" Ranma stammered.
"Long story. Shampoo tell some other time."
"So, I suppose this means you ain't after me any more," Ranma
said in a hurt tone of voice.
Shampoo hastened to reassure Ranma. "Oh no, Ukyo amazon now.
Ranma can marry her and Shampoo now. Ranma like, yes?"
Ranma turned white as a sheet at the suggestion. He hurriedly
looked over at Ukyo, who was quietly banging her head against the
counter. "I've, um, I've got to go now, Ukyo. Could I have a glass of
water."
Ukyo wordlessly poured a glass of water and handed it to Ranma.
"Thanks." Ranma poured the water over his head and then hurriedly
left.
"Shampoo, I told you, I'm not marrying you. I don't care what your
amazon laws say."
"Shampoo not happy either, but she follow law." The amazon
hesitated, then changed the subject. "You notice Ranma wear pig-boy's
clothes?"
"No. You're right though. I have seen Ryoga wearing that shirt.
It doesn't really mean anything though."
"Ranma wet too. Like maybe he just change."
Ukyo's expression grew concerned as she understood the direction of
Shampoo's thoughts. "You're saying that Ranma had to borrow clothes
from Ryoga, only changed back to a guy before he walked in here, and
then changed back as soon as he left."
"Yes. That what Shampoo thinks happened."
"That really doesn't sound good. But, Ranma told me that there's
nothing between him and Ryoga."
"Maybe Ranma not notice curse really turning him into a girl?"
"He did seem awfully enthusiastic about the school dance on
Friday. We've got to make sure that nothing happens then."
===================
"I'm not going, Kasumi. It would be too embarrassing."
Kasumi gazed helplessly at her younger sister. "Now I understand
that you're disappointed that you can't go with Ranma, but all your
friends will be there. Also you said the the principal won't let you
advance to the next grade if you don't go."
"I refuse to watch Ranma make a fool of himself and Ryoga."
Akane's voice was muffled because she had her face pressed into the
pillows.
"Well, I suppose that Ranma probably won't need your help."
Akane suddenly looked up. "Why would Ranma need my help?"
"There are a lot of things that could go wrong, and Ranma would be
very disappointed if he couldn't go to China."
"You're right, Kasumi. Ranma will need my help. I'll go."
"That's wonderful. Now let me help you get changed."
====================
"You look nice, Ranma. Are those earrings though?"
"They're clip ons I borrowed from Akane. I think asking my Mom for
help was a mistake. She got a bit carried away."
"It'll be worth it if we win. You know, Mr. Tendo is a bit too
enthusiastic about this for my tastes."
"I wouldn't worry about it. He and my Pop have been trying to get
Akane and I together for so long I don't think they can stop match
making. You don't look bad either, but there is one thing."
"What?"
"The bandanna's gotta go."
Ryoga took a step backwards. "What's wrong with my bandanna?"
"There's nothing wrong with it. It just doesn't match the tuxedo,"
Ranma said in an exasperated voice.
Sullenly, Ryoga removed his bandanna and stuffed it in his pant's
pocket.
"Stop sulking. It's just for one night. You don't have anything
to complain about. I mean, look at me. The dress is bad enough, but
the heels on these shoes are murder."
"Feh. Isn't your manhood worth a few inconveniences?"
"I wasn't the one complaining about not wearing some silly
bandanna. Now shut up and get ready to act romantic."
====================
"Will you relax, Ranma? You're as stiff as a board."
"That's easy for you to say, you're not the one dancing with a
guy." Ranma caught sight of the look in Ryoga's eyes. "No wisecracks.
You know what I mean." Despite her words, Ranma did manage to relax and
even managed a somewhat convincing smile.
"Mind if I cut in?"
"What?" Ranma exclaimed, as someone swept her away from Ryoga.
"Ukyo, haven't I talked to you about this?" Ranma peered over Ukyo's
shoulder to see Shampoo leading Ryoga away.
"Shampoo, let go of me." Ryoga was trying to pull free of Shampoo
without creating a scene, and not having much luck at it.
"No, Shampoo stop you from taking advantage of Ranma's curse."
"It's not like that," Ryoga explained, "Ranma and I are just
doing this to win the trip to China."
"Ranma can go to China with Shampoo. Not have to pretend to be
girl."
Ryoga cast about for something else to say. The night wasn't going
as well as he'd hoped. A nearby voice provided the inspiration he
needed.
"Kuonji, I won't let you corrupt Shampoo! Release her now or
suffer the consequences."
Ryoga looked in the direction the voice came from and sure enough,
there was Mousse threatening a palm tree. "All right, Mousse. Shampoo
is all yours." As Ryoga spoke, he rudely shoved Shampoo into the
half-blind amazon male.
"Stupid Mousse, let go of Shampoo."
Smiling happily, Ryoga looked about for Ranma, but couldn't catch
sight of her. He did however, spot a familiar head of short black
hair. Akane. She was dancing with Kuno, and looking profoundly
unhappy. Well, Ryoga could fix that.
Stepping up beside Kuno, Ryoga smashed an elbow into the side of
his head. When the older boy slumped to the ground unconscious, Ryoga
moved closer to Akane.
"Hello Ryoga. Do you want to dance?"
Since Akane was smiling at him, it was all Ryoga could do to nod
dumbly. He put his arms gently around Akane, and tried to remember
which foot he was supposed to move first. After a few false starts he
managed to get underway. He enjoyed several minutes of contented bliss
before an outstretched leg tripped him. Blinking he found Ranma hauling
him to his feet.
Ukyo and Akane stared at each other dumbfounded as Ranma guided
Ryoga away. "You two, enjoy yourselves now," she called.
===================
Outside of Furinkan's auditorium, trouble was brewing for the
happy couples.
"My congratulations. Those forged invitations did prove most
useful. I think it best that we separate now though. Do as you please,
I will find my darling Ranma. Oh-ho-ho!"
Mikado smiled uneasily as the crazed gymnast bounded away. She
was pretty enough, but he'd rather kiss a snake. Tonight though, he was
on a mission of revenge rather than one of love. Ryoga Hibiki would pay
for humiliating him twice.
====================
"Akane, I can explain this."
"Don't bother. I think I can guess. You had some plan to stop
Ranma from going to the dance with Ryoga and it didn't work."
"Yes. I suppose it was fairly obvious."
"How dare you speak to the fair Akane, cur. Though you share the
name of my goddess of okonomiyaki, I will not spare you."
"Share the name... Just how stupid are you Kuno?" Ukyo was
astonished by the sheer gall of the bombastic kendoist.
"Verily, Tatewaki Kuno knows no limits. I shall avenge the foul
blow you struck earlier."
As Kuno drew his bokken and started forward, Ukyo raised an
eyebrow. "I don't know what your talking about, but if it's a fight you
want you won't be disappointed."
The students of Furinkan, always ready for a good fight, readily
made room for the duel to begin. The chaperone faded into the
background, wishing someone else had drawn this duty. Someone like Miss
Hinako. Noticing a disturbance at the other end of the auditorium, he
decided it was his duty to attend to that first.
===================
"Ryoga Hibiki, I challenge you."
"Again? Stay here Ranma. This won't take long."
Ryoga noticed that Mikado was wearing roller blades, but with his
own feet firmly on the ground he didn't think that would be a problem.
Ryoga aimed a jab at Mikado's head and was unsurprised when Mikado
skated backwards out of range. He repeated the maneuver twice more with
similar results. Mikado was evidently hoping to tire him out. The next
time instead of a jab Ryoga lunged forward, his blow ending two feet
past the point Mikado anticipated. The punch connected solidly with
Mikado's shoulder and the force of the blow spun him around.
Ranma was watching the fight from the sidelines, when a sudden
premonition warned her of danger. Her intended leap forward was
transformed into an awkward sprawl, as she barely managed to avoid the
ribbon that flashed over her head.
"Tell me what you've done to Ranma." A flick of Kodachi's ribbon
sent Ranma desperately scrambling to safety. "If you do it quickly, I
might not hurt you too badly."
Ranma stood defiantly. "I'm not the one whose going to get hurt."
"Really?" Kodachi's ribbon flashed out again. Ranma attempted to
move backwards, but found herself tripped by her long dress. Kodachi
smiled as her ribbon looped itself snugly around her opponents waist.
"I'm afraid you're not dressed for a fight, dear." With a twitch of
wrist, Kodachi sent Ranma crashing into the refreshments table, spilling
the punchbowl over her.
Ryoga found himself distracted by the struggle taking place on the
periphery of his vision, and Mikado was quick to take advantage.
Skating a short distance to build up momentum, he launched a kick which
sent Ryoga staggering backwards.
"That does it! Shi Shi Hokodan!"
The white clad form of Mikado was briefly outlined against the dark
green ki blast, before he was entirely overwhelmed.
Turning, Ryoga was greeted by an unusual sight. Ranma was
launching a counteroffensive using the desserts from the table she'd
been hurled into. Since Ranma was using the speed from her Amaguriken
technique, Kodachi was already plastered with desserts from head to
feet. Several unfortunate bystanders had been hit as well. Even as
Ryoga watched in amazement, Kodachi slipped on a piece of pastry
striking her head on the hardwood floor.
===================
Meanwhile, Ukyo and Kuno were engaged in a hard fought battle.
Early in the fight, Ukyo had discovered that Kuno's training in kendo
was intended for use against armed opponents and she was having
difficulty holding her own. She was currently retreating, kicking
chairs into Kuno's path in an effort to slow him down. Kuno simply
sliced them to pieces without even pausing in his attack.
"Your efforts to flee mean nothing, dog!" Kuno yelled joyously.
At last he faced a foe who fought fairly, instead of resorting to
diabolical tricks in order to gain victory.
Without replying, Ukyo ducked under a thrust and swung at Kuno's
legs, knocking him to the floor.
"So, you fight on. Very well. Strike! Strike! Strike!" Kuno
began thrusting rapidly, calling out with each blow. Ukyo fought to
maintain her footing as the concrete wall behind her was demolished by
the air pressure of Kuno's attack.
"Stick boy leave Ukyo alone!" Before Kuno had a chance to turn a
bonbori slammed into the back of his skull rendering him senseless.
"You didn't need to do that, Shampoo. I could've beaten him," Ukyo
protested.
"Shampoo no want to marry stick boy if he beat Ukyo."
Ukyo gave an involuntary shudder at the thought. "These Amazon
laws of yours really suck. Where were you any way? You were supposed
to keep Ryoga busy."
"Shampoo have to get rid of Mousse.
"He was here also? That's enough for me. I'm leaving. "
Shampoo nodded her agreement as a section of the wall collapsed.
==================
"I can't believe that Mikado and Kodachi showed up. I really wanted
this dance to go well too."
"Don' worry, wahine. Fighting to remain togetha is very romantic.
Dere just one ting you gotta do to be sure you win."
"Just what is this one thing?" Ranma regarded the mutant Hawaiian
that had sprung up next to her with suspicion.
"You gotta kiss!" the principal exclaimed enthusiastically.
"What!?"
"No kiss no win. All da great couples, dey kiss."
Ranma looked at Ryoga, who had paled noticeably on hearing the
victory requirements. Just one kiss and the road to Jusenkyo would be
hers. Puckering her lips and screwing her eyes tightly shut, Ranma
slowly leaned towards Ryoga. At the last moment, she paused unable to
continue. While Ranma hesitated a sudden shove sent her stumbling
forward into Ryoga, who reflexively caught her. They stood frozen, with
their lips pressed together for a split second before jumping apart.
"So beautiful. You da winners!" A tear gleamed in the principal's
eye as he made the announcement. "Here da prizes."
Ryoga and Ranma each looked down at the object they'd been given.
"Plastic crowns? What happened to Hawaii, you freak?" Ryoga
growled.
"Oh dat? Wit all da damage da school can't afford da trip."
"What!" Ranma slowly advanced on the principal. The night air of
Nerima was soon split by screams of agony.
==================
Kasumi was collecting a load of laundry from Nabiki's room when a
small object caught her attention.
"Oh my!"
In her hands Kasumi held a picture of Ryoga and a female Ranma
peacefully sleeping, with there arms wrapped around each other.
"This really isn't good."
End Chapter 9