No Need for Ranma
A Ranma � and Tenchi Muyo Alternate History
By Ammadeau
Roy.Fokker@UNSpacy.org

A Disclaimer:
	These characters
Do not belong to me
	Please do not sue

	Ranma cursed his luck as the bus splashed him, squeezing 
the dirty water out of his now red hair and trying to hand dry his 
much curvier chest.  A few minutes later and he was before the 
Masaki household, home ever since his pop died protecting him 
and his mom, six years ago.  It seemed like a lifetime.  They 
moved in with his cousin Tenchi and uncle Nobuki, who had lost 
his own spouse years before.  Memories of good times spent there 
were almost enough to wash the bitter taste of China out of his 
mouth.

Chapter 1: The Return of Ranma

	Tenchi looked up from his homework to wonder who could 
be knocking in the middle of the day. It would be almost another 
week before his cousin Ranma was to come back from his training 
journey to China. His father was at work and Auntie Nodaka was 
out buying groceries.  Grandpa rarely visited, often Tenchi would 
be the one to go and see him.  The tension between father and 
daughter hadn't really lessened over the years, not even after the 
death of its cause, the man that Nodaka had married against his 
wishes.
	Tenchi opened the door to face a beautiful young redhead 
dressed in a red Chinese shirt and black pants.  "Um . . . excuse 
me?" he managed to blurt out.
	Ranma looked up and said, "Oh, hi Tenchi."
	Tenchi was stunned.  At school girls rarely paid any 
attention to him, usually gawking at his cousin who was oblivious 
to their interest.  Here was a girl that knew his name and was so 
casual with it like they were old friends.  Yet he was sure that he 
hadn't seen her before.  With that flaming red hair she'd be hard to 
not notice.
	"Ah, who are you exactly?"  Tenchi asked, too confused to 
worry about being rude and not knowing what else to say.
	Finally Ranma remembered just what he looked like at the 
moment, a little surprised that he could so easily forget something 
like what gender he was.  He guessed that coming home from 
China he had gotten so used to the differences in his two forms that 
he didn't notice them anymore.  "I'm Saotome Ranma," he said, 
rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment, "sorry about this."
	"Ranma?" Tenchi said, even more confused then ever.  He 
was sure the Ranma he had shared a room with hadn't been a girl, 
and the way that the wet shirt clung to her ample features not only 
identified her as a girl but started a slight nosebleed.  Someone 
must be playing a joke on him or something.  "Ranma," Tenchi 
said and laughed sheepishly, absently rubbing the back of his head, 
totally unaware that he was mimicking Ranma's earlier gesture, 
"That's funny I have a cousin with the exact same name.  You 
could be related to him."
	"I am him," Ranma stated, starting to grow annoyed with 
both his cousin and his curse.  "I know I don't look like it right now 
but I am your cousin Ranma that's been staying here for the past 
six years.  Just get me some hot water and I'll explain everything."
	"Oh, okay, won't you come in?"  Tenchi lead the way back 
into the house, leaving 'Ranma' in the living room as he got a glass 
of warm water from the kitchen.  Did Ranma get a sex change in 
China?  The very notion seemed ridiculous.  Ranma was the 
manliest person he knew.  Auntie Nodaka was forever telling her 
friends of how 'manly' her son was.
	Despite the confusion with his cousin, Ranma felt great 
being back in the calm Masaki living room with all of the chaos of 
China.  Soon he'd see his mother again, hang out with his cousin 
and friends, go back to school (urk, well not everything is 
pleasant), and his life would be back to normal, that is if her could 
keep away from cold water.  Yeah right, he hadn't had much 
success with that lately.  Ever since getting the stupid curse, 
disaster after disaster seemed to strike him and his life had been 
hectic enough to begin with.
	Tenchi came back in and gave Ranma a glass of water, his 
face still marked by confusion.
	"There's a place in China called Jusenkyo," Ranma began 
to explain, "Its a valley filled with cursed pools that various people 
and animals have drowned in over the years.  Anyone falls into 
these pools takes on the form of whatever drowned there.  Cold 
water activates the curse, but thankfully hot water reverses it."
	And with that he dumped the glass on himself, changing 
before Tenchi's startled eyes, from a beautiful red haired woman to 
his black haired cousin.
	"So you . . .?" Tenchi managed to stutter out.
	Ranma nodded.  "Yep, fell into spring of drowned young 
girl.  Very tragic story of a young girl who drowned there 1500 
years ago."
	Tenchi really needed to sit down after seeing the change, 
"How did this happen?"
	"Well, let's wait for my mom to come home.  I don't want 
to explain this more than I have to."
	Nodaka was overjoyed to see her son again, but was less 
than pleased when she found out about his curse.  She had always 
tried to raise him as the pinnacle of manhood, and now with a 
careless gesture he had become half-woman.
	"Well you know that pops always wanted to take me to 
China to train," Ranma began to say after his mother demanded an 
explanation, her hand reaching for the hilt of her katana.  He knew 
from their sparring that she knew how to use it, in fact the only 
person that could match her skill was her father.  "It was part of his 
dream.  I guess when Tendo-sensei took over training me it became 
his dream as well.  He would always talk up the ancient mystery, 
the beauty, the fierce battles, and also the many sights pops wanted 
me to see.  One such place was Jusenkyo.
	"The guide there tried to warn us, but his Japanese was 
pretty bad and Akane and me were too hyped up to try to listen 
anyway.  We were jumping from these bamboo poles over shallow 
pools practicing mid-air combat.  Soon Tendo-sensei had joined in.  
Well, I've always been a little better than Akane and got in a lucky 
shot, knocking her into one of the pools.
	"I was worried when Akane didn't surface immediately 
since I know she can't swim, but the pools couldn't have been more 
than waist deep.  Then suddenly a tiger jumps out of the pool and 
attacks me!  Well mom you know how I am with cats so the rest of 
it was kind of a blur.  Next thing I know is I'm sitting next to a 
panda, my hair is red and my chest is . . . um . . . you know, 
bigger."
	When Ranma heard his mother shouting at Mr. Tendo on 
the phone about showing him just how sharp she kept her katana, 
he decided to save the rest of his story for later, like some time 
next decade.

	"Aren't you even going to start your homework?" Tenchi 
asked his cousin, who was currently lounging on his futon looking 
up at the ceiling while Tenchi was busy doing math.  Tenchi had 
the same amount of assignments as Ranma and knew that it would 
be hard to get it all done in a week.  In was no surprise to Tenchi 
that Ranma didn't even bother to bring his homework with him.  
Just about everyone knew how Ranma felt about school. 
	"Hey I just got back you know, I need a break.  Besides 
there's almost a week before school starts, I have plenty of time to 
get it all done."
	"Did you forget Ranma that the teacher gave you a whole 
different set of assignments so you couldn't copy off me or any of 
your girlfriends."  The teacher had wised up to this when Ranma, 
never being an exceptional student, started handing in homework 
like Ami's, who was the brightest kid in the class.
	"Girlfriends?" Ranma asked with some alarm.  "What are 
you talking about Tenchi?"
	"Oh, come on.  Those girls who are always helping you out 
in school. There's that klutzy one with the weird hairstyle, the one 
that lives at that temple, and the quiet one with the short blue hair.  
Not to mention the one with long brown hair that's always hanging 
off you with stars in her eyes."
	"There just my friends is all Tenchi.  So what they help me 
out sometimes, I've been teaching them all martial arts to pay them 
back for it.  They were really eager to learn for some reason."  
Then Ranma decided to change the subject, "So Tenchi found out 
what's really in that cave yet?  The whole demon thing is probably 
only to keep people away.  There could be some kind of treasure in 
there."
	"You know its kept locked and only grandpa has the key."
	"So, he must keep the key somewhere.  I bet its in his office 
at the shrine.  All you have to do is sneak in there and put the key 
back later."
"Easy for you maybe. You have any idea what he'll do if he 
catches me?  He's been forbidding me to even go near that cave 
since I was little."
	"He won't do anything to you, after all your his favorite, his 
heir.  You he'll forgive."  Ranma didn't bother disguising the 
bitterness he felt to the old man who refused to acknowledge him 
as his grandson.
	"I don't know about this.  I want to but . . ."
	"Jeez, you've sure turned cowardly since I've been away."
	"Hey, you take that back!" Tenchi shouted.  Though he had 
never told him this, Tenchi idolized his cousin and tried to emulate 
him as best he could.  Tenchi had never been all that brave, and so 
worked hard to be as fearless as Ranma, except when it came to 
cats that is.
	"I mean who would have thought that the once great Tenchi 
Masaki, captain of the undefeated kendo club, would have turned 
chicken so quickly."
	"Stop it right now Ranma!"
	"And afraid of his own grandfather no less, a feeble old 
man.  Such a shame."  Ranma knew that Kasuhito was anything 
but feeble, but he wanted to goad his cousin on.
	"All right already I'll do it!  I was going to visit him the day 
before school anyway, but you are coming with me, all the way 
into the cave to face whatever is in there."
	"Wouldn't miss it.  Have to make sure that you don't 
chicken out."
	Tenchi decided to switch the subject back to him.  "So it 
must be rough to be in love with a girl that changes into your 
biggest fear."
	"What?!!"  Ranma practically screamed, exasperated and 
utterly confused.
	"You and Akane must have had some pretty romantic 
moments in China, after all the trouble you went through to be 
alone together.  Out under the stars, waiting for old man Tendo to 
fall asleep so you can sneak into her tent and  . . ."
	"Have you gone insane?!!  I would never do anything like 
that with an uncute tomboy like Akane!  And if I had tried 
something that macho chick would've booted me right back to 
Japan!  She wouldn't have come at all if she hadn't threatened 
Tendo-sensei with her cooking.  Besides," Ranma continued in a 
much softer voice as he looked back up at the ceiling, "she hates 
me now."
	"Oh," Tenchi said, "Why do you think that?"
	"Maybe the words 'I hate you and never want to see you 
again' were a hint."
	Tenchi winced.  That was cold, even for Akane.  He'd only 
met her a few times since his grandfather didn't want him to even 
try picking up Anything Goes style.  While she wasn't always 
understanding, he could tell at heart that she was basically a good 
person.  He could also tell while she treated Ranma as an almost 
hated rival, that she actually considered him a friend and perhaps 
something more.
	"She says she blames me for her curse.  I mean I don't get 
it.  I did knock her into the pool, but she's the one who knocked me 
into the spring of drowned girl so we should be even.  At least she 
got cursed to become something cool.  I get an instant sex change 
and end up as some kind of pervert.  And it was her father that 
brought us there."
	"She probably just said that in the heat of the moment.  I 
doubt that she really meant it."  Ranma himself had told Tenchi 
that Akane was liable to say anything when she got really angry.
	"Maybe, but she refused to talk or even look at me all the 
way back to China.  She even went so far as to eat her own cooking 
so she wouldn't have anything to do with me.  Thankfully Tendo-
sensei took up the cooking after that.  It was so bad that we had to 
part ways once we reached Japan."
	Tenchi actually managed to convince Ranma to at least 
start his homework, though doubted he'd be finished in time for 
school.  It wasn't that his cousin was stupid, a little na�ve 
sometimes yes, but not stupid.  It was he just didn't see any worth 
in school and thought of it as wasting time.  It was the Art that 
Ranma lived for, and Tenchi sincerely hoped that his cousin could 
find something else in life besides martial arts.  Like a nice girl to 
settle down with.
--
My mail doesn't like long messages, so expect chapters 2-6 to
follow.  Please C&C.

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