Wanna Bet 2!
    24 April 1999

A Ranma 1/2 spamfic by HKMiller

  (Crossover warning; spamfic continuation
    using characters copyright Takahashi Rumiko
     and many, many others...)

- - - - - - - - - -
It was a dark and stormy night in Nerima.  One rival
slammed her plans down, picked up a blowtorch, and began
an all-nighter; another screamed his frustration as the
rain hit.  In the Negaverse, Queen Beryl hatched yet
another plan to gather energy.  In space, a pirate ship
entered the solar system.

- - - - - - - - - -
The next morning:

"School?"

"That's right, boy!  We're going to be staying a while!"

"It's the same school that Eikane, Shampu-shampu, Ukyagi,
and I go to.  We'll walk you there."

As the five entered the school gates, there was an eerie
silence.  A few bandage-covered boys cowered in corners.

- - - - - - - - - -
At home, Kasunamidandi chanted.  "Retrace and spin,"
she sang, waving her arms gracefully.  Moments later,
the house was clean, the laundry done, and the dojo
repairs completed.

- - - - - - - - - -
"WHAT?  FIANCE?"

"Kunou.  Stand in the Hall."

Tatewaki Kunou raced down a school hallway carrying two
water buckets.  He yanked open the door to room 1F and
threw the water in.

"Never, Ranma Saotome!  I shall NEVER accept your 
engagement to Eikane, Nabisa, Ukyagi, and Shampu-shampu!
I must have ALL FOUR!"

Ranma stared, slit-eyed, at Kunou, as gasps of surprise
surrounded her.  "Fire.  Ball."  She said between gritted
teeth.

- - - - - - - - - -
"RANMA!  Prepare to Die!"

Ranma, surprised, landed on one hand and just leapt free
from the impact crater left by the bandanna'd boy with
the umbrella.

"You!"

"You haven't changed, Ranma.  You're still good at
running away."

"Someone you know?"  Eikane asked.

Ranma agonized visibly for seconds, trying to remember.

"Don't strain your brain remembering, Ranma."  Eikane
added.

"Like you should talk, Eikane.  Ranma looks just like you
last week, when our old playmate Akiko Biikodachi stopped
by."  Ukyagi remarked drily.

"Speak of devil," added Shampu-shampu.

Ranma and Ryouga stopped still in mid-move, mouths open, as
four one-hundred-ton mecha, dressed in gymnastic leotards and
wielding clubs the size of houses, landed on the Furikan
schoolgrounds.  An eerie laugh heralded the arrival of Akiko
Biikodachi herself.

"I spent all night inventing these mecha!  You won't find
THESE so easy to destroy!"

Eikane and Shampu-shampu glanced at each other and shrugged,
then both leapt into action.  A few minutes later, large
chunks of mecha littered the school grounds.

"They're your WHAT?"  Ryouga stared.

"Two of my fiancees.  Want one?"

"Never mind.  Sorry to have bothered you."  Ryouga slunk off
before either Eikane or Shampu-Shampu could notice him.

- - - - - - - - - -
"It was then," Genma poked his glasses, "that we learned
the truly horrifying part of the curse."

"Oh, my.  You mean there's more?"

"You've seen the way my son eats normally.  In his cursed
form, his appetite is increased by a factor of ten, and
he still eats this incredible quantity of food in less time
than his normal form takes to eat his normal meal."

"Oh, my.  That is horrifying."

- - - - - - - - - -
Sailor Moon and Magical Girl Pretty Kassie confronted the
kitchen youma, waving their crystal cooking implements,
giving speeches, and performing silly gestures.

"Foul defiler of all that is food..."

"Evil corrupter of innocent spices..."

"..in the name of the Moon,"

"Jurai, and Kami-sama,"

"WE WILL PUNISH YOU!"

Sailor Moon removed her tiara, which metamorphosed into
a disk-shaped object.  "Moon Okonomiyaki Magic!"  she
cried as she hurled it.  

Magical Girl Pretty Kassie formed an energy ball with one
cupped hand below, and her crystal heart-topped
cutting knife above, then fired it.

The two attacks hit the youma, who promptly crumbled to dust.

- - - - - - - - - -
Nabisa, in her Iczelion battlesuit, holding a camera, peered
closely at Eikane, Shampu-shampu, and Ukyagi in the bath.
She smiled as she positioned herself for the shots which
would fetch the most money, singing a little tune to herself
from an American musical she'd seen recently.

	"In another dimension,
	With voyeuristic intention,
	Well secluded, I see all."

- - - - - - - - - -
A bit later, Nabisa's iczel appeared in her bedroom.
"Nabisa!  Trouble!"

"ANOTHER universe-devastating alien?  How many are there,
anyway?"

"Kaosgato, a destroyer of ancient alien ruins, artifacts,
and civilizations."

"All right.  Just a minute while I see if Oneechan is
free."

A few minutes later, a fully-suited Iczelion stood on the
bridge of the Tsunami, watching as her sister's ship easily
dispersed the energies of the main gun of a spaceship one
quarter the size of Earth's moon.

"We have to get those Light Hawk Wings added to your
equipment, Iczel."

"Now, Nabisa, you know I can't help you do that.  They're
a secret."

"How are we going to beat Kaosgato?  I usually just fight
henchmecha."

"Oh my, that is a problem.  Let's see...  How about a
diversion or two, then we'll let Ranma handle the main shot."

"Ranma?  What can he do against THAT?"

"Not _him_."

Ranma and Ukyagi materialized on the bridge, looking confused.

"Nabisa, Ukyagi, be a couple of dears and fire at it from
the side for a bit, won't you?"

"Kasunamidandi-oneechan, I think that thing's a bit beyond
Sailor Moon's power."

"Your _other_ power, Ukagi."

"Oh, right.  METAMORFORCE!"

Ukyagi, now Moldiver, and Nabisa, now Yen Iczelion, flew
out and flanked the Souja, shooting at it as gnat-like
annoyances.  Meanwhile, Kasunamidandi splashed Ranma.

"WHAT'D YA DO THAT FOR?"

"Ranma, that ship will make you late for dinner if it's
still there in five minutes."

"WHAT?  LATE FOR DINNER?!"  Ranma began to wave her arms
and chant.

       "Darkness beyond blackest space,
        deeper than the deepest night!
        King of twisted space and time,
        who hides between the Sea of Stars.
        In thy great name, I pledge myself to power.
        Let the fools who stand before me be destroyed!

	  TAKABISHA SLAVE !!! "

The Souja promptly disappeared in a blast of raw energy.

- - - - - - - - - -
Ranma touched their hands, and Kasunamidandi, Nabisa,
Eikane, Shampu-shampu, and Ukyagi sighed.

And they all lived happily ever after.

THE END.

Recap:
  Ranma is engaged to all five girls, polygamy now being
    legal in Japan.
  Ranma changes into Lina Inverse when wet ("Spring of
    Drowned Sorceress").
  Belldandy and Tsunami both merged with the three-year-
    old Kasumi, forming Kasunamidandi.
  Nabisa = Nabiki + Nagisa (Iczelion)
  Eikane is Eiko Managi, switched at birth.
  Shampu-shampu is Shampoo's brain in an android body.
  Ukyagi is a lovely sailor-suited warrior, and possesses
    a Mol Unit.