-----Original Message-----
From: Kenjiko2@aol.com <Kenjiko2@aol.com>
To: ffml@fanfic.com <ffml@fanfic.com>
Date: Friday, April 23, 1999 6:27 PM
Subject: [FFML] Fic [Ranma] Draft-- Girl days, part three

Well, parts one and two are in slight revision and expansion, and I
got on a roll, so here's part three.  If anyone seems slightly OOC, well...
PLEASE DON"T SET A PACK OF RABID WEASELS ON ME!

Darn!  Do you know how difficult it is to get a pack of rabid weasels, never
mind teaching them to track someone through cyberspace?  What am I supposed
to do with them now?  Sick them on Tybalt?

Oh, and many thanks for the kind comments on parts 1 and 2.  Now, on
to a pack of concentrated lunacy...

That stuff can be dangerous, you know.

kenjiko (Robert Haynie)

And of course, C&C is appreciated, comments that my mother swims
after troop ships are not.  (She uses a rowboat.)

C&C, as in Cursing and Carrying on?  Okay, gotcha, I kin do that...

-- Listar MIME Decryption --------------
-- Name   : GIRLDAY2.TXT
-- Decode : from quoted-printable...

   Girl Days

   A Ranma 1/2 fanfiction

   By Robert Haynie

   (Insert that disclaimer that we all know so very well here)

   Part Three:  Girls Day Out (of your mind)


   A week had passed since the training had begun.  A week that
Ranma had bit by bit slowly gotten used to.

That's an incomplete sentence (sentence fragment), and while I don't frown
on incomplete sentences that are used to effect, I'm not sure that's the
case here.  Personally, I'd join it to the previous with a comma:

A week had passed since the training had begun, a week that Ranma had, bit
by bit, slowly gotten used to.

Really, though, even that doesn't make a lot of sense.  Ranma became used to
the week?  What does that mean?  Perhaps you could say something like:

A week had passed since the training had begun, a week during which Ranma
had, bit by bit, slowly adjusted.

Even that might be an inelegant way to write it, but at least now you can
infer that Ranma's adjusting to the training, instead of the concept of
dividing time into seven 24-hour periods.  ^_^

An even better way might be:

A week had passed since the training had begun, and Ranma had adjusted to
it, bit by bit.

Your mileage may vary... work with it until you like it.

She'd found that there

was a reason for the way that female undergarments were made--

To please people like Happosai, right?  Right?

they

simply fit the female body better than a t-shirt and boxers.  A bra
resulted (after one got used to it) in increased comfort and less
back-strain, panties were actually comfortable around... there.

   Today neither was actually a factor.  Because it was very hot,
very sunny, and no-one had any work to do-- not even, for once,
Kasumi.  This unusual state of affairs had resulted in Nabiki
deciding to sunbathe.

Of course, something tells me that it doesn't always take unusual
circumstances for Nabiki to reach such a decision.  ^_^

   One thing led to another, and there were four sunbathers in the
yard of the Tendo Dojo.  Nabiki in one of her almost- not- there
bikinis, Akane in a somewhat more demure bikini, Kasumi in a modest
one-piece, and Ranma--

Another fragmentary sentence, which you can link to the previous with a
comma, or simply add a verb:

Nabiki was in one of her... etc.

   In a bikini that was apparently in a war with Nabiki's as to who
was the more , well, less.  Although the middle Tendo sister would

who's was  (or)  which was

never admit it, at the moment she was slightly jealous.  Not that
Ranma was looking as good as she was-- that didn't matter-- but that
Ranma was at the moment as casual as she was about it.

   Actually, Ranma was having less problems with a bikini than she
did with lingere.  Her curse pretty much meant she had to wear female

lingerie

swimwear, and she'd worn two-pieces before.

I'm not sure if I accept that statement -- I know Ranma's been drawn wearing
two-piece bathing suits before, but I don't know that I've seen it in the
manga or the anime.  Not that it really makes much of a difference...

This was just less of a

two-piece, and the week's passing had made her a lot more comfortable
with her female form.  She wasn't HAPPY with it, of course-- but she
was dealing with it.  Nodoka's gentle encouragement probably had a
lot to do with that.

It wasn't yellow and polka-dotted, by chance?  ^_^

   Akane glanced over at the buxom redhead, and felt a familiar pang
of denied jealousy-- and that jealousy was DEFINITELY about
appearances.  It had always seemed cosmically unfair that that
arrogant, overbearing, insulting BOY should not only be a better
martial artist than she was, but a better looking GIRL.  If somewhere
deep in her mind the thought that Ranma's figure and face weren't
REALLY her fault existed, it hid very well to survive the troops of
Anti-Nice-Thoughts-About-Ranma agents that carefully patrolled the
corridors of her subconcious.

I really like your descriptive and clever style of writing, but occasionally
you wind up with sentences like this one, that scan so poorly that you
really need two Phd's and a shot of tequila to follow them all the way to
the end.  Please, please consider rewriting this particular sentence with
the layman in mind.  If not that, then at least rearrange the words so
they're more coherent, something like:

If the thought existed, somewhere deep in her mind, that Ranma's figure and
face weren't REALLY her fault,

Even then, with the negative and the phrase that follows (which contains
it's own negative, among other things), I have a hard time really grasping
the concept you're trying to express.  I really think you need to rework
this one.

(Recently they hadn't been doing a

very good job, though-- she had been acting nicer even before the
training had begun-- not much, but a little bit.)

   Ranma just sunned.  For once, no raging Akane, no glomping
Shampoo, no blind Mousse, no Kuno-- either of them-- and no screwy
Ryo--

   "RANMA-- PREPARE TO DIEERRRRGH!"

   Hmm.  That's not how it goes, usually, is it?

   Ranma leaned up on one elbow, her hair untied at the moment and
flowing free, unconciously looking very much like an incredibly sexy
girl in a very skimpy bikini.  (Of course, at the moment, she WAS an
incredibly sexy girl in a very skimpy bikini, but she didn't think of
herself that way.  Usually.)  "Oh, Hi, P-chan.  What's wrong?  You
don't look so hot."

   "Who... Who you call... urgh."

   Now, to understand what's happening here, we must look deep into

the mind of Ryoga Hibiki.

Ack!  No!  Run away!  Run away!

Ryoga, you see, has a problem with

terminal shyness.  Around a pretty girl he get's VERY flustered.

gets

Around a pretty and scantily clad girl the word flustered is no
longer adaquate and this writer doesn't think there is one in the
english language to describe the state of mind Ryoga would be in.

   Faced with four pretty girls (of which three were definitely
scantily clad and one wasn't wearing that much, really) Ryoga Hibiki
did the only thing he could possibly do--

   Develop a major nosebleed and pass out.

Or just explode on the spot.  ^_^

   Simple hormonal overload for a man who had no idea what to do
with his hormones.

I think his problem is that his HORMONES don't know what to do with
themselves.  They're probably wandering around his body, lost, most of the
time....

   Akane stared at the lost boy doing a dead boy impression.
"Ranma, stop... um... no, you weren't picking on him, were you?"
This was confusing to her.  There wasn't anything she could blame
Ranma for this time, although she knew she SHOULD have been able to
find something...

Demonstrating a severe lack of creativity, aren't we, Akane?

Actually, Ranma called Ryoga "P-Chan", which definately means he was teasing
him.  Shouldn't Akane pick up on that much?

   "Didn't lay a finger on him.  C'mon, let's get the jerk
inside..."

   ####

   From a sea of darkness, Ryoga's mind rose slowly to a familiar
sight... the cieling of the Tendo Dojo.  And above him was the face
of an angel-- Akane Tendo, resplendent in a yellow sundress... and
there was her sister, the clever Nabiki, in a robe, and her other
sister, the kindly Kasumi, in another robe, and the other sister,
Ra--

   Wait.  Ranma wasn't a sister.  Ranma wore a pigtail, not a
ponytail.  Ranma didn't wear a slightly oversized t-shirt with a
Hokuto-no-Ken iron-on over her bikini.

   Ranma wasn't a HER!  Not when he could help it!  What the hell
was going on?!?  It had to be some devilish plot of Ranma's to take
advantage of Akane, or to harrass Ryoga, or probably BOTH!

   "Ranma-- I don't know what you think you're doing, but you aren't
going to get away with this..."

"Get away with what?"

"Whatever... whatever it is that you're trying to get away with!"

"Man, you're hopeless.  I ain't tryin' to get away with anything.
I'm just facing my femininity with masculine determination."

"You're WHAT?  No, don't EVEN try to explain!  I KNOW your
tricks!  WHY ARE YOU WEARING A BIKINI?!?"

"Because I think it's better for sunbathing.  Nabiki and Akane
agree with me there.  Kasumi, well, each to their own right?"

"That's NOT funny!  Look, I can see Akane or Nabiki dressed like
that--"

"You did," interjected Nabiki, grinning.  "That's why you passed
out."

Heh.  ^_^

You've got an excellent grasp of these characters, I must say.  Sometimes
that's more important than knowing how to write... not that I'm saying you
don't, of course, because you obviously do.

Akane, of course, missed that totally.

"I mean, I can't see HIM in a bi... Don't say it, I know I did,
but that's not what I MEAN!  I want an explanation!"

And Ranma, sighing, explained the concept of Girl Days.

Imagine Ryoga's mother coming up with the concept of Pig Days.  ^_^

####

Ryoga stared at Ranma in mixed amusement and sympathy.  As much
as he detested his rival (or at least told himself he detested him--
or her) he knew that this had to be hard on the girl-boy.  Although
Ranma seemed to be taking it with unusual calm.  Well, that was
probably just her innate stubborness, refusing to be fazed.

Assuming that the preposterous tale was true-- which Ryoga didn't
believe for a second.  No, this was just another in the long string
of Ranma-esque lies.

At that point, Nodoka came downstairs.  "Hello, Ryoga-san.
Ranma-chan (wince), Akane-chan, would you two do me a favor?"

"Sure, Mom.  What you need to get done?"

"I need you to pick up some special rice for a special soup I'm
teaching Kasumi.  I thought we had some, but..."

"Sure, I'll... um... that means going... out."

Ranma had avoided leaving the Dojo since the training began.

Except to shop?  Or were we visiting the fabulous Tendo Dojo Mall,
conveniently located two floors down?

She

might have to dress like a girl and stay one, but she wasn't exactly
wanting anyone to SEE her.  (Ryoga, Shampoo, the Kunos, and the like
didn't in her opinion count-- it was NORMAL people she was
embarrassed about.)

Hmmmm... possibly my personal preference, but I would use "she didn't
exactly want anyone"

Also, I'd set off "in her opinion" with commas.   "and the like didn't, in
her opinion, count --

Also, why is she embarassed about normal people?  What is it about them that
she finds embarassing?  ^_^

These are all nitpicky things... but that last sentence DOES make it sound
like she's embarassed ABOUT normal people, rather than embarassed in front
of normal people, or embarassed to be seen by normal people....

"Ranma, part of being comfortable with your girl-side is being in
public with it.  It's time you started adjusting to that.  Now, go
upstairs and put on something nice."

(She HAD to say something nice, didn't she.  That means no blouse
and slacks.  Darn.)

As the red-headed girl trudged up to her room, Akane glared at
the Saotome matriarch.  "Why do I have to go with that Baka?"

Not only should baka not be capitalized, but you do realize that it's
extremely rude?  I would never expect Akane to use it in front of someone as
proper as Nodoka, and if she did, I would expect her to be severely
reprimanded.

My friend, who recently returned to the states after several years in Japan,
told me a story about a foreigner who was severely beaten by several
Japanese men for using the word baka.  The judge threw the case out of
court, because, "It's very bad to use such language.  You should know
better."  This is a typical attitude in Japan, he said, despite the fact
that the same word is used frequently on television.

Anyway, I would not expect Nodoka to let people talk that way when talking
to her, especially given that Akane's just talking in a conversational tone,
rather than in anger.

"Because you are her fiancee, and because she may need a few tips
on acting properly in public.  She's learning better behaivior, but I
don't want her alone at this period in training."

Ryoga suddenly realised that everything Ranma had said was the
truth.  His mother WAS behind this.  But that would mean it wasn't
Ranma's fault.  And EVERYTHING was Ranma's fault.  So...

So Ranma had somehow manipulated her mother into this, in some
elaborate plan to embarrass Ryoga and take advantage of Akane!  Now,
if he could just figure out how this perversion was intended to do
so...

[Author's Note: The astute reader will notice that Ryoga Hibiki
has what can best be described as a somewhat unusual logic system.
Rather than going from facts to conclusion, one starts at the
conclusion and jams the facts around it.  And in the minds of the
likes of Ryoga Hibiki and Tatewaki Kuno, we all KNOW what the
conclusion is.]

Ryoga thinks like this when he's angry, but he can be far more lucid when
he's calm.  I really don't see him as the self-delusional type, not nearly
like Kuno anyway.  But whatever....

"If you say so," grumped Akane.  One thing she had learned
quickly-- what Nodoka Saotome wanted, Nodoka Saotome eventually got.

Ranma hadn't yet learned the feminine concept of taking a long
time to dress.  So she came down the stairs fairly quickly-- and
nearly sent Ryoga into shock.

Ryoga hadn't quite gotten around the Girl Days concept as much as
he thought he had.  He'd expected, at most, Ranma in her usual
chinese clothes with a bra underneath.

Instead, there was Ranma in a white blouse, grey miniskirt,
stockings, a pair of black flats, and... and with her hair in a pony
tail with a black bow.  And earrings.  And even, he realised with
sheer confusion, a hint of blush and some pale pink lip-gloss.

Ranma presented herself for inspection.  Nodoka looked her over,
and nodded.  "Matching nicely, dear.  I'm pleased.  But aren't you
forgetting something?"

"What?  I got the makeup right, didn't I?"

   "Yes, dear.  But you forgot your purse.  After all, you might
want to stop for a cold drink on the way back, it's such a hot day."

"Aw, crap.  KNEW I'd forget something.  The white handbag for
this combo, right?"

Now, that's no way for a lady to talk.  Why isn't Nodoka reprimanding people
for their language?

"That should do well enough, Ranma-chan. (wince) Hurry up now..."

As Ranma went to retrieve the forgotten accessory, Ryoga
determined to follow her and find out just what the REAL plan was...

####

"You know the real reason Mom sent you with me, don'tcha?"  Ranma
said, her ponytail waving a bit in the slight breeze.

"To keep an eye on you, baka. So you don't embarrass yourself."

"Maybe," Ranma said morosely.  "But she's also training you, the
way I got it figured."

"Training -- how do you figure that?"  Akane stared at the
redhead in sheer confusion.  Had Ranma somehow noticed something she
hadn't?

"Yeah.  You know she's always trying to get us together.  Maybe
she's more subtle than our fathers, but she's got the same agenda.
Now, if I can't find a cure, and we do get married-- not that I'm say
we will, o' course, just a what if-- she figures you're gonna have to
get used to a husband who's a girl a lot of the time."

Akane paled.  What Ranma had said made perfect sense.  "That's...
That's DISGUSTING!"

"Huh?"  replied Ranma, suddenly knowing-- just KNOWING-- that
Akane had once again leap to a conclusion that was NOT anywhere near
what HE'D meant at all.

"How can your mother want to train us to be LESBIANS?!?"

"NO!  That's NOT what I meant!  I mean she just want's us to be
able to deal with my curse, is all, she ain't thinking of nothin'
like THAT!"

Akane slowly relaxed.  "No, you mother wouldn't think like that.
You're right."

Ranma also relaxed, until Akane added, "That's what a pervert
like YOU is for."

"Akane no baka."

Akane smirked.


####

Ryoga followed, as stealthly as he could.  Which, actually, was
pretty stealthily.

His stealth quotient went up rather severly as a splash of water

>from a passing car reduced his detection factor-- and his size

severely.  Ryoga followed with a despairing "Bwee."

and his size -- severely.

P-chan carefully kept the two girls in sight, knowing that if he
lost track of them his next stop could be practically anywhere in
Japan-- or farther, even.

Well, that's open to interpretation, (some vehemently deny that he wanders
the world), but he's been known to at least wind up on some of the other
Japanese islands.

To his great annoyance,  the two girls seemed to be on at least
cordial terms-- and then he heard Akane blurt out one word.

"Lesbians?"

And it all clicked in P-chan's rather peculiar mind.  THAT was
Ranma's vile plan-- to drag Akane into some sort of twisted lesbian
relationship--

No, that couldn't be right.  Even RANMA wouldn't degrade himself
to THAT level.  It had to be something else.  Something equally
sinister, something...

In aggravation at not being able to figure out Ranma's plan, he
let out a frustrated "BWEEEE!"-- which Akane heard immediately.

"P-chan!"  Before the piglet had a chance to think, he was
gathered into Akane's arms, and firmly-- VERY firmly-- hugged.  As he
began to pass out from a combination of lack of oxygen and proximity
to Akane's... um... frontal area, she added, "Poor thing-- you're all
wet again?  You're always getting wet.  Poor thing..."

"Oh, JOY," murmured Ranma.  "Wonder-swine strikes again."

"What was that, Ranma?" asked Akane, eyes darkening.

"Nothin'.  Let's get that rice for Mom and get home."

"Oh, Ranma.  Sure you don't want to stop somewhere on the way
back for a drink?  It's awful hot today..."

"Maybe... but I doubt it."

As the two girls walked to the specialty rice store (and the one
pig was carried), the day had been so far quiet, pleasant (within
reason) and uneventful.

Your use of parentheses generally makes your sentences more difficult to
read, rather than easier to read.  If I were you, I'd try to tone them down
a bit; it's a habit that's starting to annoy me.

This sentence, for example.  It's not a really complex one, but it's a bit
hard to follow because of the way it's written.

Hands up, everyone, who KNOWS this ain't gonna last.

No fair!  As the author, you have inside knowledge.


You've used this style of writing (the author speaking directly to the
reader, on occasion) consistently, and it's a valid style, but not one that
I really like.  Just thought I'd mention that.

####

Akane was carrying P-Chan.  Ranma was carrying a 1-kilo bag of an
obscure rice that Nodoka used in making a special soup.  There were
recipies that Kasumi didn't know (although at times that seemed
impossible) and when Nodoka had first served the soup, Kasumi had
almost begged her to teach her that recipie.

recipe

Ranma was in full agreement there.  "You know, Akane, TWO people
able to make Mom's special shrimp and rice soup is gonna be heaven."

"Hmm... maybe I should learn it too," replied Akane.

Ranma for once kept her mouth shut instead of wondering if there
was a Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Shrimp.  Since she was
walking slightly behind Akane, she was also spared the pounding that
her expression would have initiated.

"Ranma, it's so hot... are you sure you don't want to stop and
have a soda or something?"

"Yeah, I'm--"  Ranma broke off, at a sign in a small ice-cream
shop.  Reading SALE.  Two for One.

"I'm actually kinda thirsty too... and a little hungry." She
pointed, and Akane grinned in delight.

"Trust you to find the best deals in snacking, Ranma!  Let's go!"

P-chan wondered if Ranma had some devilish scheme concerning
Ice-cream.

####

The shop was new, and the sale was an effort to get new
customers.  The counterman smiled as two cute girls entered, one
carrying a stuffed animal.  Well, he thought it would be a stuffed
animal.  When the brunette put the piglet on the table, he realised
it was alive.  Probably a pet.

"May I help you ladies?" he asked.  Hmm... the brunette was cute,
but the redhead was a knockout.  Maybe he could find a way to ask her
out in a little while.

Scrutinising the menu, and checking her purse, Ranma ordered.
The counterman's eyes widened.  "Um... you want all that?  You know
it's 2-for-1, right?  So you only need to order half as much."

"Nope.  That's why I'm ordering what I'm ordering."

"You know it's 2-for-1, right?"

"Nope."

Is this really the correct response?  That's how I read it, anyway.

"You really want four Banana splits and two stawberry sundaes and
two jumbo Calpis?  Just for yourself?"

strawberry

Ranma went into her Cute-As-A-Thousand-Buttons act.  "Oh, it's so
HOT, and I'm so very hungry... I'm sure I can finish it all!"

Not that I ever considered buttons all that cute  ^_^

The counterman smiled.  "Miss, if you CAN, it's on the house, for
you and your friend both.  I'll have to see it to believe it.  Can I
get your pet anything?"

Ranma looked at P-chan.  "You want anything?"

P-chan fumed.  Yes, he DID, but how does a pig order?

Akane said, to both their surprise, "Well, I'd like a chocolate
parfait, and give the second one to P-chan.  That's my piglet.  I
know he likes chocolate because I saw him eating some of mine."

The counterman smiled.  When the redhead failed to eat her whole
order, he'd offer to pay himself, and get her to have a cup of tea
and a few snacks later.  Soon enough, he'd be able to build it into a
relationship of sorts, and then...

POW!

Oh, sorry... just anticipating where that relationship might go...

These dreams were dashed as the redhead began to tear into the
various confections with a speed and skill that he'd always thought
was reserved for the local pack of loony martial artists.  And he'd
never heard of martial arts ice-cream eating before.  (He'd also
never been to the Tendo Dojo at breakfast.)

"Ranma," whispered Akane, "Your mother wanted you to eat more
ladylike, remember?"

Ranma reluctantly slowed down-- a bit.  From a vacuum she shifted
into a feminine but still accellerated pace.  As each confection
arrived, she would eat them very neatly but very fast, and the
counterman suddenly decided that if he took this girl out for tea and
snacks he'd be rapidly a pauper.  Oh, well...

he'd rapidly be

(sounds better to me anyway)

As the last bit of sundae vanished, and Ranma sipped her Calpis,
the counterman approached, grimacing.  "You win, miss.  Have to say,
I'm impressed.  I thought only a martial artist could do something
like that."

Ranma Blinked.  "Well... SHE'S a martial artist (pointing at
Akane) and I've picked up a few tips from her."

Akane began to freak.  Ranma was not only being nice, she was
being modest.  This was definitely wierd.  Then she caught the
twinkle in Ranma's eyes, and realised that it was a new form of
teasing.

"Oh, no," retorted Akane.  "SHE'S the real martial artist, I'm
just an amatuer."

The counterman stared as the first Anything-Goes Martial Arts
Humility contest began.

So did P-Chan, who was still nose-deep in his parfait.  What was
Ranma DOING?!?  Had his time in this female body warped his mind?

Well, of course it had.  ^_^  That was the point, wasn't it?

"Oh, Akane-chan, but you're so strong!  Almost as strong as a
boy!"

"But RanKO-Chan (Ranma DOUBLE winced) you're so graceful and
smooth-- like a fine ballerina!"

"OOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOH!!!!!"

Ranma and Akane blinked.  That didn't sound like either of them--
oh, NO.

"THERE you are, you fiendish harridan!  WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH
MY RANMA-SAMA?!?!?"

To Kodachi's (You KNEW it was her, didn't you?)

Well, it might have been Katsuhito Jinnai or Naga, but then, given the
dialogue, things would have definitely become a lot more weird...

surprise, Ranma

stood, bowed, and said, "I'm sorry, Mister Counterman, but I have to
go outside, because this girl wants to start a fight, and you've been
SO nice to me, so I don't want to get your store broken."

Akane took Ranma's lead (for once).  "Hai.  We hope to come
again.  Thank you for your excellent service."

As the two girls left, pig and rice in hand, Ranma whispered,
"Did I do that right?"

"Yeah, I suppose.  Nodoka-san's been teaching you pretty well, it
seems."

"Wait-- where are you going?  I haven't thrashed you yet!"
protested Kodachi.  This was, as it were, not in the script.  She'd
intended to force the location of her beloved Ranma-sama from the
red-haired witch, and said red-haired witch wasn't playing fair.

"If you require a fight, Kodachi-san, we should do it outside."

Kodachi Kuno was... confused.  So confused that she stood frozen
for an entire minute before screaming and dashing out the door after
the now rapidly running girls (and pig).

####

"We lost her yet?"

"No."

"Damn.  Guess I'll have to fight her.  I hate fighting girls."

"Right now you ARE a girl"

"Hmm... maybe you're right... but I don't wanna hit her..."

"Can you think of a girl you'd more want to hit?"

"I have an idea, actually."

"It's a day of Miracles."

"Ha ha ha.  It is to laugh."

As Kodachi approached, Ranma moved into a combat stance.  The
miniskirt, as designed, unsnapped at the bottom and the velcro at the
side-hems separated, both giving freedom of movement and revealing a
bit more leg.  (Why it doesn't unsnap while running, only while
fighting, is a mystery of Anime.  Don't worry too much about it,
you'll get a headache.)

Now, this writer COULD go into great detail about the fight.  He
could, but he's not going to.  Because for once there wasn't a
fight-- not EXACTLY-- what there WAS was a chain of events that was
at best desribed as... well, actually, pretty much normal for Nerima.

Kodachi, deciding to start with a distracting maneuver, shot out
a ribbon and lassoed P-Chan.

Akane screamed in rage.

P-Chan bweeeeed in mixed rage and terror.

Ranma suddenly found herself at a loss.  She couldn't endanger
P-Chan-- well, she COULD, but that would get Akane mad at her and
they'd been getting along so well this afternoon.  She began to run
through options while shifting to a defensive stance.

Kodachi shot the ribbon-bound P-Chan at Ranma.

Ranma dodged, and P-Chan zipped back to Kodachi like a porcine
yo-yo.

Akane charged, and got a facefull of black rose petals-- which
clung.  The now blind Akane started scrabbling at them.

Shampoo came by on her bicycle from hell, and saw Ranma.  She
wasn't certain WHY ranma had taken to dressing like a girl and
staying in girltype, but she was certain Akane was to blame, so she
rocketed towards Ranma, crying "Airen!  Shampoo save you from pervert
girl's girl-spell!"

Somehow, that doesn't seem like a conclusion Shampoo would jump to.  I'd
expect her to ask Ranma what was up, after glomping him... but again, it's
your story not mine, and you've handled the characters, for the most part,
very well...

Ranma began to sweatdrop.  THIS she did not need.

Shampoo tossed her ramen order aside, which knocked into Kodachi,
causing her to fumble her next pig-attack, and wrap her ribbon
loosely around her.

Akane continued to scrabble at the rose petals blinding her.

A large bowl of steaming hot ramen and broth landed right on top
of P-Chan.  The results were... predictable.

Kodachi realised that the ribbons had suddenly become much more
snug.  And that something was pressing against her.

Ryoga realised that he was pressed against a very curvy girl in a
skimpy leotard, he couldn't move, and... he was naked.

Akane managed to get the rose petals off, and STARED in absolute
shock at the sight of a bare-nekkid Ryoga tied to a completely
flustered Kodachi.

You realize that image makes my head hurt.

Ranma continued to be chased by Shampoo, and hadn't noticed the
bizzare tableaux unveiling next to her.

Shampoo suddenly stopped, and stared.  Ranma, realising that
Shampoo had stopped, turned-- and stared.

Akane murmured, "Ryoga, how could you..."

Shampoo sputtered, "Lost boy doing HENTAI things now?  That NOT
right!"

Kodachi snarled, "You PEASANT!  How DARE you embrace the Black
Rose in such a state of... of... stateness!"

Akane growled, "I always thought I could trust YOU, Ryoga, but
this... THIS..."

Shampoo added, "Lost boy get really lost, but some places Lost
Boy should NOT get lost!"

Kodachi FUMED as Ryoga tried to squirm free-- which looked to all
concerned as though he was trying to do something entirely different.

Akane screamed, "RYOGA!  YOU'RE--- YOU'RE A WORSE PERVERT THAN
RANMA!!!"

Now THAT'S an insult!!!

Shampoo advanced, bonbori in hand.

"GET THIS MOLESTER OFF ME!" screamed Kodachi.

Ryoga began to stammer, "But... but... it's not what it looks
like... it's not my fault, I didn't mean to, I mean, I..."

And as three girls began to perform their sworn duty to punish
all perverts, a fourth one collasped next to a tree, laughing her
red-headed butt off.

####

"It HAS to be your fault, SOMEHOW."

Ranma handed Ryoga another bandage.  "Hey, sorry.  But now you
have some idea of the kind of crap that happens to me all the time."

"You deserve it.  I don't.  Why didn't you explain that it was an
accident?"

"Well... that would have meant explaining about P-Chan.  Now, if
you don't care, and it happens again, I could--"

"NO!  All right.  Maybe just this once it wasn't your fault.  But
it SHOULD have been."

"Man, you are SUCH an idiot."  Ranma wrinkled her nose.  "Anyhow,
even if Akane no longer thinks it's your fault-- even though she has
no idea how you got into that kind of predicament-- she's not happy
with you right now.  You may want to go on a training trip for a
while."

"I hate it when you're right.  But I still don't trust this Girl
Days thing.  I still think you're up to something."

"I am.  A week in bras and panties so far."

"Oh, VERY funny."

The Eternal Lost Boy hefted his pack, and started to leave.  Then
he paused, and added, "Does that sort of misunderstanding really
happen to you every day?"

"Nah. Only about four-five days a week."

"I never thought I'd say this-- but man-- Girl, I feel for you."

And Ryoga Hibiki walked off into the sunset.  Which was a pity as
he'd meant to head north.

Heh heh heh

####

End part three

Brudda, you is a funny man!

And a really long chapter, too!  Now, if you'll excuse me, it's 5:38 pm, and
I was off work at 5:00 pm, and I'm missing Bakacon.  Ciao!!!