*SPOILER WARNING!*
This story is a Ranma 1/2 - The Matrix crossover spamfic, and probably gives
away a lot of the plot of The Matrix (what little plot there is, anyway).
So you have been warned!
This is a work of fan fiction; all Ranma 1/2 characters are copyright Rumiko
Takahashi and all of the companies who really own her work.
Three guesses as to what movie Sky, Jeff and I saw this evening. ^_^
The FFML Matrix
M A Davis / Miko
Plot: Sky Rigdon, Jeffrey Cornish, M A Davis
"Unfortunately, nobody can be told what the FFML is,"
Ryoga said.
Ranma stared at his rival in confusion, then over at Ukyo,
who stood nearby. The okonomiyaki chef had led Ranma to this
dark, dank room in an ancient hotel, ostensibly to meet someone
called "Wanderius" who knew great secrets of the universe.
Ranma had been hoping for a new fighting technique, at the very
least, but when he'd got here, Wanderius had turned out to be
Ryoga.
Ranma stared at the mildewed curtains and the peeling
wallpaper. "Ryoga," he asked, "what the heck are you babbling
about?"
"You've been looking for me for several years," Ryoga said.
"No I haven't!"
"But I've been looking for you for a lifetime," Ryoga
continued, ignoring his rival.
"Well I've been here all along," Ranma said. "What's this
about, that bread thing again? If you wanna fight, you don't gotta
to drag me all the way up here."
"I'm going to give you a choice," Ryoga said. He held out
his two hands, then opened them. In the left palm was a blue pill;
in the right palm, a red pill.
"Swallow the blue pill," Ryoga said, "and you will wake up
on your futon, and life will go on for you as normal. If you call
that normal.
"On the other hand, you can take the red pill, and you'll see
this fictional world for what it truly is."
"You never talked like this before, you know that?" Ranma
said. "So, is this one of the ghoul's tricks?"
"It's no trick," Ryoga said. "Remember, all I can offer you is
the truth."
"Yeah, whatever," Ranma said. He grabbed the red pill and
swallowed it. "There. Are you happy now? Is that all? Can I
go?"
Ryoga held up a hand mirror, the face of which was spidered
with cracks. "Remember this, Ranma?" he asked.
"The nanban mirror?" Ranma replied. "Geez, Ryoga,
where'd you get that? That thing's dangerous!"
Then Ranma frowned. The face of the mirror was moving.
He watched in fascination as the shards flowed together, the
cracks vanishing like ripples on a lake. In fact, the surface of the
mirror was like water....
Ranma reached out and touched it. "What the heck?" he
asked. His finger went into the mirror, as if it really were a liquid
surface. As he withdrew his hand, some of the mirror-liquid
clung to him. It began to stretch and grow, covering his fingers,
his whole hand, and his arm....
"Aaaaaigh! Getitoffme! Getitoffme!" Ranma screamed,
waving his arm about. The mirror-stuff continued to crawl up his
arm, over his shoulder, and up the side of his neck....
"Any moment now," Ryoga said. "Any moment now...."
Ranma screamed, and was sucked out of existence.
***
Ranma awoke in a bathtub. The water was cool, and she
was therefore female. She cursed softly, climbed from the tub,
and began drying herself.
Where the hell was she? This certainly wasn't any bathroom
she'd been in before.
Thankfully, she found her clothing waiting for her. She got
dressed, and stepped into the main room.
It was a large, dark living room, bathed in the dim light of more
than a dozen computer screens. Desks lined the walls, with
computer terminals set on them, and with people sitting before
them, typing away. In the center of the room was a couch, a
coffee table, and two comfy chairs.
Ryoga sat in one. Ukyo sat on the couch. She patted the
cushion next to her, inviting Ranma to sit.
Ranma took the other comfy chair. Ukyo frowned.
"Welcome to reality," Ryoga said.
"Uh... okay," Ranma said.
"I think you know our compatriots," Ryoga said. "Over
here, we have Dr. Tofu. He was the first to discover the FFML
matrix, and escape into the real world. That's why he
disappeared from the original manga storyline, you know."
"Uh..." Ranma said, looking confused.
"Don't worry," Ryoga said, "it will eventually make sense to
you. Now, sitting next to Dr. Tofu is, of course, Kasumi...."
The eldest Tendo sister turned from her computer screen and
smiled sweetly at Ranma. "Hello, Ranma! How are you doing?"
"Fine, I guess," Ranma said.
"And in the corner, we have Hiroshi and Daisuke."
"Hey, Ranma," Hiroshi said.
"Don't worry, Ranma," Daisuke said. "We got someone
good to play you. Ever hear of Tenchi Masaaki?"
"Uh... huh?" Ranma asked.
"Don't let it worry you," Ryoga said. "They've got
something going with Angus MacSpoon. Quite funny, really."
"Uh... Ryoga, you want to explain all of this to me?"
"Certainly," Ryoga said. "Have you ever heard of the
FFML?"
"I think so," Ranma said. "Didn't you mention it, back in
the hotel room?"
"Indeed. The FFML, you see, is an electronic mailing list.
It exists for the on-line publication of fan fiction stories.
Understand?"
"Um," Ranma said. "Uh... sure, okay."
"The world which you have known up until now is an
illusion. It is a fiction, written by the people who exist in the real
world. You and I, and all the others who are still trapped in the
world of fan fiction, are the pawns of the fan fiction writers,
forced to do every vile deed that they write down."
Ranma considered this. She seemed to be thinking very
hard.
"If it comes to that," she said, "I mean... if it comes to being
forced into vile deeds... something tells me that it happens to me a
lot more than to you, or Ukyo...."
"Yes," Ryoga said, "for you see, you are the one."
"The one?" Ranma asked.
"The one," Ryoga replied. "I'm sure of it."
"Ah," Ranma said. "The one. Imagine that. I'm the one.
"Ryoga, what the hell are you talking about?"
"The oracle," Ryoga said, "told me that I'd eventually find
the one, and now I have. You don't know how many years I've
wandered the earth, searching for the one... and I'll admit, after I
found you, I wandered for several more years, hoping against
hope I was wrong... but I wasn't. It's you."
"So I was prophesied?" Ranma asked. "Are you trying to
say that I'm some sort of savior? That I'm going to save the
anime world?"
Ryoga stared at Ranma.
"Save the world?" he asked. "How would you do that?"
"I don't know!" Ranma exclaimed, throwing up her hands.
"You're the one telling me that I'm some sort of chosen one!"
"Listen, sugar," Ukyo said, "all he means is that you appear
in more fan fiction stories than any other single anime character.
Really, I don't know what all the big fuss was about."
"But, now that you know the truth," Ryoga said, "you can
turn the tables on the fanfic writers, and seize your own destiny."
"Seize my own destiny?"
"Sure. Write your own future."
Ranma stood and walked over to a computer. She stared at
the screen. "So, whatever I write, becomes my reality? I can be
whoever I want to be?"
"That's how the FFML works," Ryoga agreed.
Ranma continued to stare at the screen, lost in thought.
"Hmmmm..."
***
Ranma stood in a phone booth on the streets of Nerima, and
spoke into the receiver.
"I don't know what the future holds," he said. "I can only
tell you how it starts.
"It involves a whole bunch of really neat martial arts. It
involves me never being cursed again. And it doesn't involve a
damned wedding! Got that?"
Ranma let the receiver drop. He glanced about the streets of
Nerima, then shrugged, and flew straight up, disappearing into
the clouds.
From the dangling receiver came a very confused "Growf?"
FINI