Well, I C&Ced the second half.  Why not the first?
Spoilers ahead.  Snippage throughout.

Chapter 1: Akane Tendo
True Heart's Desire

[...]

       The first thing to come to mind, as it was all too often, was Ranma.
She thought she might be in love with him.  Should she spend her
wish to make him hers forever?  A part of Akane shouted no, that she
shouldn't waste her wish on that pervert; another part shouted yes,
that there was nothing she wanted more.  But the frightening thought
was that she might already have him.  Whenever she considered the

Heh.  And how frightening is it, Akane?

[...]

       She could do something about Ranma's other fiancees.  See how
Shampoo likes being a cat all the time, or Ukyou being a real man.

The power.  Oh... yesssss!

Akane giggled, shaking her head.  She would never do that.  She wasn't
the vindictive sort; she didn't really want to hurt anyone, just to

"I only hit Ranma becuase he deserves it!"  :)

       Kunou?  Akane dismissed the idea.  Her sisters?  Here was some room
for improvement, she thought.  Kasumi was a few cards short of a full
deck, Nabiki as cold as ice, and as for herself, well, she had real

I'm not sure I agree with the characterization of Nabiki as cold as ice.
I picture her as something of a hedonist, really.

       Material visions swam before her as she took a seat on a wooden
bench.  She could be rich, richer than anybody, or have perfect
grades, or admission to the university of her choice.  She could make
herself a great warrior, and finally show Ranma what was what.  She
could cook a great meal and shove it in his face.  But no; she wanted

All things Akane would definitely think about.  :)

       In the end, she had no reason to worry.  When she ran home her
mother was waiting for her.

I remember reading another story where Nodoka reframed the peices of the
Nanban mirror into personal mirrors for "Ranma's women."  Everyone wanted
to see the future "where they married Ranma."  Everyone except Akane, who
wanted to see the future where everyone was happy.

I think I'd trust Akane the most with a wish.

This is probably one of the best peices in the collection.  That might in
part be due to the fact that this author didn't have to work with anybody
else's results, and so was able to create a stand alone peice.

[...]

Chapter 2: Ryoga Hibiki
Lucky Day

[...]

       Then when Mrs. Tendo met Ranma, all she could do was keep asking
questions. Did he make good greades in school? What did he plan to do

Grades

[...]

       Akane didn't even seem to care that Ranma even existed, now that
her mother was back. He had to resort to jokes about her cooking to get
her to talk to him at all, and all they got him was a 'Ranma, you jerk!'
and a frying pan in the face. Then she called him jealous. As if he
cared what that tomboy did!

[sigh]  That's Ranma.  :)

[...]

       Ranma leaned idly against a tree as he watched. "What the heck
is he doing? Akane's been going nuts looking for her P-chan, and here he
is playing around. What a stupid, inconsiderate jerk that Ryoga is!"

       "Yeah." A voice came from behind. "I hear he even talks to
himself!"

This quote's a little weird.  I suppose he's insulting Ranma talking out
loud, but Ryoga really *does* talk to himself...

[...]

       Ryoga smirked. "I'm the only me, Ranma. From now on, P-chan and
I are completely seperate." He opened a canteen and poured water over

Separate.

[...]

       Deciding it would be a good idea to stop and try to ask for
directions again, he approached a nearby teenage girl. "Excuse me, could

You know, it might be a little more fair to the readers to describe this
"teenage girl"...

[...]

       "Oh, thank you so much!" The girl smiled cutely. "With you on my
side, I'm sure I'll be able to win the love of darling Akari!"

[...]

       "So I would have to...." Tsubasa looked thoughtful for a moment.
"On second thought, darling Akane is the one I really love."

I'm glad to see an accurate depiction of Tsubasa.  He doesn't obsess over
Ukyo; he obsesses over every cute girl he meets!

[...]

       Ryoga's jaw dropped. "What?! How can you switch just like
that?!" He shook his fist threateningly. "You stay away from Akane *and*

Good question, Ryoga.  [nudge nudge]

[...]

       *I will grant one wish. Choose, but choose well, for I will
grant only one, and once it is made, nothing in the universe may undo it
until it has run its course. What is your true desire?*

So originally, Akane just made a wish.  Now the locket talks to Ryoga.
Hmmm.  This implementation of this plot device probably should have
been better thought out.

[...]

       Besides, it wouldn't be right to win someone's love just by
wishing for it. Ryoga would always be haunted by the knowledge that he
would never have had her without the wish.

Well, it looks like Ryoga grew up after the events at Jusendo.  Or maybe
after he tried to win Akane's love with the koi fishing rod, and seeing
what it got him.  ;)

[...]

       Except that Jusenkyo had flooded the last time Ryoga had been
there, and the waters had mixed together. Nobody knew what horrors they
would change their victims into now. And even if the pools were sorted
out, Ryoga knew that they couldn't be trusted. Things had gone wrong too
many times for it to be coincidence. No, if he was ever going to be

Good move.  Now you don't have to worry about a later author dumping you
into Spring of Drowned Girl.  :j

[...]

       "What do you think you're doing?!" Ryoga yelled, still reluctant
to hit someone who looked so much like a woman. "Are you making fun of
me?! Where did you get this pig?"
       "The new restaurant down the street. Yamadashi's Bar-B-Que. I'll
do anything to prove my love for darling Akari!"

Cute.  Appropriate behavior for Ryoga, and you explained how Tsubasa got
a hold of his diguise.

[...]

       "I AM loyal! I only love one girl at a time! And if any of
them...." Tsubasa paused, as his expression seemed to soften somewhat.
"If any of them ever loved me back, I'd stay loyal forever."

Aw... [sniffle]  Now get away, you cross-dressing pervert!

[...]

       The black piglet watched the two figures recede into the
distance. He snuggled up contentedly against the girl holding him. This
wasn't exactly what he had hoped for -- he couldn't even talk anymore.
But there was no denying how nice it felt to be liked. And this form did
make it even easier to fit into places.

Um...  Okay....  "Places."  Right.

       Yes, there were all sorts of possibilities. Maybe darling Akari
would like a new pet!

Ha!

Another good chapter.  Pretty much self-contained, with nice, light humor.

[...]

Chapter 3: Hikaru Gosunkugi
A Sorcerer's Dream

[...]

Okay.  No comments.  I just don't like this part.  It's dark, and it
portrays Hikaru as some sort of magician wannabe.  Is there any evidence
of this in anime or manga?

Sure, he's got those voodoo dolls, and weird candles, but does that make
him want to be a mage anymore than people who use Luck and Easy Birth
charms?

Anyway, I would have been much more interested if Gos had simply wished
for "Respect", or "to be stronger than Ranma".  That's what he really
wanted, right?

[...]

Chapter 4: Mousse
Clear Sight

[...]

       Mousse sighed as his mind went into a mental rewind of the past
twenty-four hours.  After the funeral of the Gosunkugi boy, he'd
returned to the restaurant to work his usual shift.  Shampoo was as
boisterous and as bubbly as ever, though in retrospect he found it
horribly annoying -- her normally educated Chinese traded for the

Why would he suddenly find it annoying?

[...]

       Mousse scoffed.  Shampoo was truly debasing herself just to get
Ranma's attention.  It made him sick.  In fact, now that he thought
on it, he really didn't find Shampoo attractive anymore.  True, Shampoo
was an outrageously physically attractive woman, but he no longer found
her attractive in a mental sense anymore.  The Shampoo he loved was
merely a figment of his imagination.  Or was it?  Sometimes it felt so
much more tangible than an ephemeral dream.

Uh oh.  Another fic type I just can't get into.  Mouse dropping Shampoo?
Maybe, but not without a *good* explanation.  He's happy gone through hell
and completely debassed himself for her.  Why change now?

[...]

       "Please, Cologne.  I am not planning anything for the Saotome
boy, nor am I planning on doing anything in the future."

Saotome *boy*?

[...]

       "I'm thinking of a lot of things, mostly about what to do now that
I have absolute clarity of mind."

Well, it looks like this was retconned away by later authors.  Even though he
wished for clarity of mind, he ended up with figment of his imagination...

[...]

       "Being beaten by someone is not an alternative.  Shampoo has no
obligation to marry anyone that beats you."
       "What if someone else beat her?"
       "Then she'd still have to marry you.  You were the first to beat
her in combat."

I agree with Mousse's statements, but I'm wondering why Ranma suddenly
wants to get Shampoo away.

You know, I'm guessing that Gary didn't write this part.  :j

[...]

       "It will be easier to roost as a duck than try to find a place to
sleep as a human.  Of course, I might get lucky and have a girl decide to

Do ducks roost?  Also, this looks a little bit too much like "roast".
I'd change your choice of words.

[...]

       "Enjoying your new gift?" a female voice asked close by.

[...]

       "I know because I granted your wish."

Consider my amulet inconsistency remark restated.

[...]

       "Because it's the best way to keep Ranma from being forced into
marrying Shampoo.  The antidote for every mind-altering spice known to the
Amazons is in that book, as well as the actual use of the original spices
themselves.  If used judiciously, and kept from being stolen by Cologne
and Shampoo, you would be able to thwart nearly every plan known to
Shampoo.  Cologne will be tougher, but I've taken care of that.  The old
ghoul will forget all about Ranma tomorrow, amongst other things."

Just how many mind-altering Amazon spices are there, anyway?  Like, zero?
There was the kairaishi mushroom, but it isn't a spice, nor did it sound
particularly Amazon.  (Shampoo bought it from a restaurant supplier!)

I thought Cologne said that there *weren't* any such drugs like that; if
there were, she and Shampoo would have used them on Ranma.

[...]

       The two women nodded as Mousse turned and left.
       Nodoka stared at her long-time friend and sighed.
       "We're turning into them, aren't we?"
       The Tendo matriarch smiled as she leafed through the book and
glanced at the case of spices Mousse liberated from the Cat Cafe.
       "No we aren't, Nodoka," she replied with a mischievous gleam in
her eye.  "We aren't going to screw up."

Cute.  Very cute.  :)

[...]

Well, for this part, I just couldn't suspend my disbelief.  Why on earth
would Mousse suddenly drop Shampoo?  It seems to me that this story could
have been written with Mousse making his wish to get closer to Shampoo.
He remembers her always calling him stupid.

Then, *after* he gets his wish, he could fall out of love.  Either becuase
he's "smarter", or/and he's fallen for his magical guardian angel who looks
just like Shampoo, but is better.  That wouldn't have been as hard to swallow.

[...]

Chapter 5: Shampoo
When You Wish

[...]

 Shampoo was usually a very light-hearted girl, and it had been long
since she had really felt sad. Now, however, she did.

Poor baby!

[...]

 There was something that was really odd about the way he'd acted just
before his death. Odd was also the locket he had clasped firmly in his

You said it, sister!

[...]

 The smoke cleared just as swiftly as it had appeared, revealing a
familiar blue shape floating in mid-room. "Ooga-booga!" the Genie shouted
as he put a wide eye right next to her ample bosom, stretching his neck
several feet and drooling slightly.

The locket's got another M.O, I see.
Genie of the locket, meet "Genie of the Ring"...

[...]

 Shampoo smiled blissfully. "<OK, and for my second wish...>"

 "<Sorry, girl,>" the Genie interrupted her. "<You only get one. Changed
contract."> He looked at a wristwatch that wasn't there a second before.

Sike!

[...]

 "None of your potions will work!" The panda grinned defiantly at her, a
gesture that could be defined as foolishly brave.

 "Good thing I wasn't going to try any potions, then." The Amazon elder
pulled out a scroll from somewhere within her robes.

[Nelson laugh]  Ha HA!

[...]

 He came already? She was about to throw herself at him, announcing her
love to all the world, but something stopped her.

 The look in his eyes.

 A look of hatred. The hatred of someone who's entire life had been
ruined.

 "Come on, granddaughter," Cologne said. "We have a wedding to prepare."

Well, I'm not too happy about the unclean thing, but I suppose it makes
sense as the easiest vehicle to acheive Shampoo's wish.  I'm just glad that
later authors don't use it as an excuse to make Akane or Nabiki hate him.

I think this is exactly the wish that Shampoo would make.  Isn't she just
being honest about what she wants?  And since she's from a culture that
believes in smashing obstacles, of course she wouldn't worry about the
"little things."  It is nice to see that she has to live with the results
of wish, though.



Another mixed bag.  I like Akane and Ryoga's stories, and Shampoo's was
pretty good, but I couldn't deal with Gos or Mousse's.  Not for any technical
reason; I just don't buy the premises.

That's about it.
Later,


Doug

----
Douglas MacDougall     Art and fiction available at my homepage:
dougmacd@thecia.net    http://www.thecia.net/~dougmacd/fanworks/