Well, I finally got off me duff and read it. I'm like that...
read things sporadically....
Thought I'd say something about it, as well-- mostly
centered around me, of course, but that's not unusual, is it?
For me to talk about myself, that is? Why, I'm doing it right
now, aren't I? ^_^
At 01:47 AM 3/26/99 +0100, Ronny Hedin wrote:
<the fic in question>
Now, exercise some sense here, everyone. I'm going to be talking
about stuff that happens in the fic, and my responses to it, so read it
first, hokay? It's worth the time, I think.... :)
Very end paragraph:
With one last pull, he twisted the blade, drawing it up towards his
heart ... then slumped back, falling limp against the hard wooden floor
with a thud.
Kept getting this one scene in my head, over and over again as I read the
fic. Something to the effect of (quick summary ahead!):
Akane's marriage, or later. Ranma meets her/finds out/whatever. He's
dressed in an expensive and well-tailored suit. His hair is cut in a
fashionable coif. Well made shoes. A successful businessman, all around.
Sees Akane. Proclaims love for her or some such thing. She's
having none of it. "You're not the Ranma I fell in love with!" she
announces, or something similar.
"But," he says in reply-- expression on his face is uncomprehending,
betrayal and hurt and wild, wild confusion. "But," he says, "I did
it all for you."
<phffft>
Scene/ending could be done, right there. Maybe a few lines about something,
emptiness or loneliness, or the futility of trying to change yourself...
that kind of thing. The profundity of the moment. Could work.
Heh. But I like. Fits in with my view that if Ranma applied himself,
he could do well at school (although the only time we hear mention of his
marks, and that they're very low, is from Prinicpal Kuno, who, while Ranma
believes him, is not what I would call the most reliable of sources, eh?).
Just needs a reason, that's all.
* * *
AUTHOR'S NOTES
<a little bit of judicious snippin' an' snappin'>
--------------
Looking back, I guess maybe Akane really doesn't come across in a
positive light in this fic. I must say that I certainly didn't *intend*
to portray her with excessive negativity, even if it might seem so if
you just look from one angle. Heck, I'm practically a fanboy of hers.
I think I know why. She's having fun at university, going out and stuff
like that. She's doing it because she wants to-- for herself. Ranma,
on the other hand, is not. He is doing it basically for her, and she
does not realise this, for a variety of reasons (Ranma doesn't explain
why, for one. She never asks. She doesn't seem curious as to why he is
doing it, in fact, and comes to her own conclusions). Ranma never gave
up on Akane, and she gives up on him. We don't like that now, do we?
One possible reason. Another might be, because, well... hrm. How
to put it? Keeps slipping as I try to write it down, but there it is,
fully formed in my head (damn staying up until early morning and then
trying to write C&C). It is because she complains of stuff Ranma does,
and then does the exact same thing. Happens all the time in real
world, as well. I always find it intensely amusing, to see people
who protest wearing fur, but wear leather, for instance. Or won't
eat meat because killing animals for food is wrong, yet have a suede
jacket, for instance (killing for food is wrong, but for fashion
isn't? And what about plants? Plants are alive as well? Oh, this is
another rant, though...).
Akane complains about not seeing enough Ranma when he starts
studying for the entrance exams, yet she played a major part in his
desire to study for them-- she in fact wanted him to try. Wants to
have her cake and eat it too, yes? We don't like that. Reminds us
too much of our own little selfish desires and hypocrisies.
We want Akane to see her part in shaping what Ranma has become,
to admit her complicity. We want her to go to him and patch things
up, because while it is true that she is the one who initiated all
their encounters and conversations while at university, it is she
who is the main reason they are apart-- it is she who did not
acknowledge to others while at university that she was engaged, it
is she who betrayed Ranma then-- not when she accepted the proposal,
but back, way back then at that moment she said she had no boyfriend
nor mention her fiancee, Ranma. That was where it began....
That could be why Akane is portrayed somewhat negatively. On
the other hand, I could make a case for it being Ranma's fault. He
was the one who didn't comprehend what was happening. He was the one
who became obsessed with studying, to the exclusion ofeverything else,
including his fiancee. He was the one who accepted going to the
university in Tokyo, instead of the same one his fiancee got in. He
did not initiate any phone calls, write any letters, stop by for a
visit or anything. Of course a relationship is going to fall apart
if one of the people in it makes no effort to maintain it....
Yet Ranma is still somewhat sympathetic, because this obsession,
his new-found scholarly and serious nature, is done purely for Akane's
benefit. If only she had told him it was unnecessary, that he did not
have to shape himself into this, it might have ended differently. If
only he had realised the need for some balance, instead of this
single-minded drive, it might not have ended badly, even if they did
grow apart and marry others (for a while there, I was wondering if
you were going to pair Ranma/Aiko-- one wonders how she would take
what happens).
And Argh; I killed somebody *again*, or at least it looks like that; a
habit I really eed to break. Actually, I didn't really do it this
time... I had ideas for a few more scenes after the point where I ended
the fic, but I decided not to include any of it since it would just take
a few steps without really *going* anywhere; instead, I'm ending at the
"end". Still, maybe you can find some small comfort in the fact that
Ranma isn't *supposed* to have died. ^_^
One realization that hit me about halfway through is the fact that
part of the reason I like Ranma (the character), is that in some ways,
he's very much like me. Of course, in others we're not alike at all...
but I have a strong suspicion that in my writing, the aspects of Ranma
that resemble me are emphasized, and the others toned down; Ooyake, in
some ways, manifest the "qualities" of mine that Ranma do not.
ApanAP.
Hehehehe.... I know what you mean. For me, it's speech. Ranma's rough
way of speaking echoes mine, except I'm much worse, both in what I do
to the language and in speed. Why, I've even approached Sana-chan
(Child's Toy) speeds before! 's why when I write Ranma's dialogue
it's sometimes excessively rough-- that's probably how I'd say it
(well, not quite. Some of my quirks have been taken out. If you've
met me, you'll probably know what I'm talking about).
Matthew Lewis is:
Matt on IRC
Sojiro_Seta on Kawaiimuck
maybeso@ican.net
a casualty of causality
____________________________________________________________
"Khattam-Shud," he said slowly, "is the Arch-Enemy
of all Stories, even of Language itself. He is the Prince of
Silence and the Foe of Speech. And because everything ends,
because dreams end, stories end, life ends, at the finish
of everything we use his name. 'It's finished,' we tell one
another, 'it's over. Khattam-Shud: The End.'"
-excerpted from Haroun and the Sea of Stories,
by Salman Rushdie
____________________________________________________________