All Akane had to do was cut the rope and let the rock fall.  

Heh. Nice fake!

And not entirely a fake either.  Akane would be committing
a sort of spiritual suicide by giving up now.

thousand times, though in reality she knew exactly how many 
sessions she'd actually endured.  

How many was it?

Almost a month's worth, now, at one repetition per day.  I tend 
to keep the timeline a little bit vague, mostly from laziness.

"You gave up trying to train us after the first night," 
Ryouga shot back.  "I was the one who stuck with it!"

Hey, it's not like Cologne actually taught the thing to Ranma, either.
All she did was demonstrate it.

Well... yes and no.  I consider Ranma's week working as 
Cologne's waitress to have been the essential element of 
his training, not his abortive attempts with the fire and his
eventual success with the fish.  That was definitely hands-on
teaching, albeit of a mildly circumspect nature.

This is a nice character bit. Considering that Ranma's learned primarily

>from Genma and Cologne, it makes sense that he doesn't know much about

what makes good teaching.

Thanks.  My own opinion is that good teaching is dictated in a
large part by the student.  Cologne was probably savvy enough
to realize that Ranma would respond best to a hard teacher, 
while I don't think Genma really knows any other way.  There
are some who might respond well to Ranma's "kick-in-the-butt"
style of training, but it turns out that Ukyou and Ryouga didn't.

Akane let out a little embarrassed laugh.  "Heh... excuse me. 
Um... I... er... had the wrong room.  For that entrance.  
Let me try that again."

"I wanted an argument. This is abuse!"

Ranma:  "Nah, with Akane, it's always 'Getting Hit on the Head'
lessons..."

WHAM<

"Natsumi!  Kurumi!" she said cheerfully.  "It's good to see 

Wasn't her name Natsume?

Probably.  I blame RpM.  I checked the spelling off "Pursuit of
Happiness."  If the real Japanese name is "Natsume," I'll just
go back and change it.

"Why you come again to this place, sir?" he asked nervously.  
"What you want with accursed springs now?"

"Nothing terribly complicated," he said casually.  Then he 
told the portly man what he was looking for.

He wants to be dumped in the Spring of Drowned Person Whose Name Isn't
Pantyhose.

"Oh sir, we have Spring of Drowned Man Named Garter-Belt, Spring
of Drowned Boy Named WonderBra, very tragic Spring of Drowned
Guy Known Only as Douchebag..."

"Oh, never mind."

The high point of this story was the dedication and persistence with
which the various characters carried out their training. You might say
that the title of the story refers to them in addition to the monster.
You've shown the strengths of the characters in a way that's very
believable and consistent with what we already know about them.

Thank you.  That was my intent.

The low point for me was the use of the "Jusenkyo Preservation Society."
I don't mind that much the mixing in of anime continuity -- Natsume and
Kurumi, for example, fill a needed role in your story; I'm not exactly a
fan of the characters, but your treatment of them is interesting so far.
But the JPS, frankly (and strictly IMO), is just a lame idea, and I
don't see anything in your treatment of it *so far* that suggests it'll
be any better in this story.

If the JPS exists, where were they during vol. 37-38 when Plum had to
run all the way to Japan for help? And if they're worried about Ranma
and company "abusing" their curses, why haven't they just given them the
CURES? Yes, Jusenkyo needs to defend itself (and its Guide) against
abuse, but it can do so much more subtly. If the spirit of the place
deemed Pantyhose a real threat, he could end up "accidentally" slipping
and falling into the Spring of Drowned White Mouse. "What are we going
to do today, Pantyhose?" ^_^ To me, having it guarded by these Keystone
Cops rather than its own nature kinda weakens the mystic-legendary
quality of the place.

I had a feeling I'd hear from you about the JPS.  First off, I make no
excuses for the concept - I also thought the JPS was a lame idea,
one that didn't even make sense within the course of the episode, much
less in context with the Ranma continuity as a whole.  (I mean, what
WERE they trying to achieve in that show, anyway?  All that dunking
and shouting, as if there were some way that a person with a curse
could control whether they changed or not... oops.  Wait a sec... 
That seems strangely familiar...)  There's no justification for their
existence that I can see, so we have to assume that they are simply
a gang of fools who go around annoying people all the time (which is
not a concept entirely foreign to the Ranman 1/2 universe).

Perhaps a bit more text to that effect is in order.  The Guide, for instance,
would probably look upon them in the same way that one regards a
particularly embarrassing family member.  I will consider mentioning
that these self-appointed guardians have never actually successfully
guarded the springs against anything, since I also believe that 
Jusenkyo can take care of itself (hence the memory-clouding business
I hypothesized).  

The real reason they were there is that I wanted to put Pantyhose 
Tarou into a fight where he had every reason to change (or to use
his opponent's curse against him), but made the choice not to.  I 
suppose I could have arranged a different opponent, but that is the
underlying purpose for the conflict.  If nothing else, Kiini seemed 
suitably dangerous.  It's another step in setting the stage for a 
more difficult choice that Tarou will have to make very soon...

I'll be impressed if anybody figures out what Tarou plans to do in
advance.  

Just my two yen on this. Overall, great chapter. When's the next one?
:-)

Sooner, I expect.  I've got more breathing space for the first time in
months, and my writing rhythm is coming back to me.

Thanks as always for your C&C, Gary.

Grayson Towler
grayson@rigroup.net

http://www.rigroup.com/~grayson/relentless