Just a few corrections and comments here:

"KaraOhki" <karaohki@snet.net> wrote:

"Yeah.  I think I'll go see Ukyo tonight before rehearsal.

Missing a quote mark here.

"But that's not the worst of it.  I made a big mistake when I
encouraged Mousse to pursue you.  He didn't need the encouragement,
and now he thinks you've accepted him.  I'm afraid we're going to have
a big problem with him.

And here.

Akane, you look terrible!  Does it hurt?"

And here..

"I told you, Mousse.  I have no intention of marrying you."

Suddenly, both wrists were taken in a grip that was extremely painful.

"Actually, Shampoo, I'm not giving you a choice."

This really seems too extreme for Mousse. I can see him thinking that
Shamps really *does* want to marry him and won't admit it, or that
she'll change her mind once they're married, but him not caring what she
thinks at all I really can't believe.

"You don't seem to think there would be anything wrong with my husband
having a mistress, do you?  Does that mean you wouldn't mind if your
husband had one?"

Genma smiled, and nodded at his daughter-in-law.

"Nothing at all wrong with it, Akane.  Why--"

I was going to say that this was OOC for Genma -- after all, lust has
*never* been one of his vices, even in the Happodaikarin story where
he's at a resort full of naked women -- but then I realized that he
might just be yanking Nodoka's chain here.

Looking forward to the next chapter.


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html