Sarlag stepped tentatively ahead. With slightly sweaty hands, he held
his AK-47 forward, ready to fire at a moment's notice. There probably wasn't 
any
danger; the gas would have taken out anyone the bombs hadn't, and the other
patrols had already been through and cleared away the locals. Still, you
couldn't be too careful, especially in a village of fanatical warrior women. 
The
place definitely gave him the creeps. He'd be glad when his unit shipped

out to

somewhere, anywhere else.

Looks like broken line breaks in this paragraph, unless it's *my* mailer
acting up?

(hm. it does continue throughout the fic, btw)

The last line doesn't quite sound right to me; IMO, either
"somewhere, anywhere." or "somewhere else - *anywhere* else."

I know you commented on it before, but Sarlag really *does* sound like
a name out of some cheesy SF novel (or movie). :-)

	"I bet she's not married yet." Rou pulled on her long hair to make her
face him. "How about it, girl? Looking for a couple of husbands?"

Bleah. Feh. Few things will produce an instant reaction of utter despise
as much as this... but I guess you are aware of that. And of course, we'll all
be very, very angry if he doesn't get his just desserts - which unfortunately
also means that it's very predictable that this *WILL* lead to trouble.

	"Don't worry, Pop. The life of a true martial artist is filled with
airsickness. Right?"

:D

	Kodachi laughed. "Oh, I'm only teasing!" But her voice had a malicious
edge to it that belied her words.

IMO: "Oh, I'm only teasing!" Kodachi laughed, but her voice had a...

	"I'm gonna beat you, y'know. All I need to do is figure out how you've
been cheatin'. Then we'll go at it fair and square, hard and fast, and you'll
see, I'll be the one who comes out on top." Ranma winced, probably at his own
choice of words. It was lucky that Akane was asleep, Tofu thought.

that Akane slept

	And if he survived until it was all over, then nothing would keep him

>from confronting Kasumi. But for now, he couldn't let that get in the way.
Like

it or not, he had to play the nice guy one more time. Above all, he had to

keep

alert, and keep his wits about him. This was serious business.

Which implies that somehow Tofuu has changed to not really *being* a
nice guy? Hm, interesting...

	She felt herself being thrown down onto the ground. She lay on her back,
looking up at the darkening evening sky. The man... the man stood,

watching her

with eyes as hard and cold as steel.

ground, and she lay 

	... and screamed in pain as Ti Pi's dagger sliced into his chest. Blood

...which was almost guaranteed to happen. Still, I probably wouldn't
have been able to stomach reading the scene if it hadn't, but...

	"Er... yes. Excuse me." Kodachi nodded curtly, and stood, moving over to
the ladies' room.

Sudden sugar overdose? :-)

	The last bit of food on Kasumi's plate was finished. She wiped her mouth

Err... Was finished? Really, doesn't that sound just a *bit* clumsy?

	But not fighting. That simply wasn't the kind of person she was. She had
found that out when Kaede-sensei had given her the chance to try out her
fighting clothes. They were animated by a powerful fighting spirit, the

teacher

said. The same technique used with swords and the like produced so-called

magic

weapons. With the sensei's clothes, the result was a battle suit that fought 

IMO, "technique, when used with swords and the like, produced"

for
its wearer. Kasumi remembered how Akane had had such a thing at one time.

IMO, had owned

>From there they will fly to Xi Ning tonight, and tomorrow it's on to the 

As you see, there was a ">" here that shouldn't be.

	A smooth voice issued forth from the computer speaker. "Windows
zero-three conflict error. This application will shut down due to an error.
Please reboot your system."

Some things never change, eh? :-)

	Soun took a seat at the keyboard. "No, no, you just go play and leave it
to Grandpa."

Why am I expecting him to fail gravely? :-)

	"Yes. My answer's yes. After all, what girl *wouldn't* want to be
Sanzenin Mikado's wife?" It took all of her self control not to giggle.

	Ukyo kissed Mikado. "Yippee!" Azusa shouted. "Wedding cake!"

h0h0h0h. :-)

	Of course, Ranma didn't understand. It was clear to Tsubasa what Kasumi
was saying. Ranma, deep down, wanted to be a woman. How could he not? But his
male insecurity wouldn't let him admit to himself the superiority of the

female

sex, so he struggled against it. It was obvious.

	Would Ranma really go to Jusenkyo during this trip? Tsubasa had no clue.
But *he* would go there. He knew a good thing when he saw it. And then all of
Ranma's women would be attracted to him.

Hahahah. This is good. Gotta love this scene. :D

	Mu Si sat on the bed as he flipped through the TV channels. Finding
nothing interesting, he switched it off. yawned, stretched, and didn't feel

                                        ^
That's supposed to be a comma, right?

	Thanks for reading, and as always, I'd like to know what you thought.

I think I like this chapter a lot more than the last one ... perhaps becuase
it feels like it focuses on the characters and their changes again, rather than
the development of the actual plot. And of course, many warm and/or slightly
humorous scenes ... to a degree that I'm expecting all *HELL* to break loose
in the next one.

Good job; keep it up.


---
Ronny Hedin, thark@hem2.passagen.se, http://nabiki.newberry.edu/thark/
                    "Momomoto, famous japanese, can swallow his nose."