The World Turned Upside Down
By Douglas "Candle Light Author" Helm and "Tuxedo" Will Wolfshohl
Disclaimer: Sailor Moon, Sailor Senshi, and all terms, names, etc.
associated with the series are copyrighted by Naoko Takeuchi and
Kodansha. We make no claim to them and this work of fanfiction should
not be seen as making a claim.
Those characters that are original and the story "The World Turned
Upside Down" are copyrighted (c) 1999 by Douglas Helm & Will Wolfshohl.
This fanfic and hundreds of other Sailor Moon fanfics reside in "Tuxedo"
Will's SM Fanfics Archive at http://log.on.ca/users/helm/anime/index.htm
Send comments to: Douglas "Candle Light Author" Helm (dhelm@log.on.ca)
or "Tuxedo" Will Wolfshohl (wwolfshohl@logicon.com)
Chapter 8 - Ducking the Duck
Misako was about to turn back to the story when she heard Usagi call
out, [Miko-chan! Telephone!]
[Okay 'Sagi!] Misako called back. Getting up, she left the room and
wandered into the living room of the Royal Suite. She noticed her sister
was rooting around in the refrigerator, complaining the entire time
about the lack of "unhealthy" food to eat. [Moshi moshi?] she asked as
she picked up the receiver.
[Hi Miko-chan,] Yuki's voice floated through the telephone line,
[Whatcha up to?]
[Hi Yuki-chan,] Misako replied.
She then stuck her tongue out when she heard Yuki gasp, [Kami-sama, she
actually lives!] Misako frowned in irritation as her friend started
giggling. [Man, I thought you really put your foot into it and got
grounded!]
[Yuki, I AM NOT that bad!] Misako protested.
[Sure you are,] Yuki teased, [Anyway, Yumeko's comin' over, and I
thought we could all do some stuff.]
Misako started to respond and then paused, what about the story? [Gomen
Yuki-chan,] Misako said after a long moment of silence, [I'm doin'
something with 'Sagi.]
Yuki snorted faintly before saying, [Hey, who's your friend? Me or
Usagi?]
[Both of you are,] Misako answered hotly.
[What are you doing?] Yuki asked, [I mean I haven't heard from you in
the past coupla days.] Before Misako could respond, Yuki added in a
pleading tone of voice, [Please Miko-chan?]
[Iie gomen,] Misako responded slowly, [I'm having a great time with
'Sagi.] She heard Yuki mutter something acidic so added, [Yuki-chan...]
Yuki cut her off by saying, [I think that's Yumeko at the door. I better
go. Ja Miko-chan.] There was a click and Yuki was gone. Misako gave a
shrug. Although it hurt that Yuki was acting this way, she had been
telling the truth -- she was having fun with Usagi.
Usagi, who had been drawn by Misako's raised voice, slipped back into
the kitchen. As she worked at making them a snack, her mind was mulling
over what she had overheard Misako say. In the meantime, Misako had gone
back to writing the story, determined not to let Yuki's little snit fit
make her feel guilty in the least, but it did.
"Doug, you're gonna pay for this," Macavity growled softly. He
was being hugged almost vice-like by Terra. The small child
was dozing on the couch having fallen asleep almost
immediately upon ensconcing herself on the couch.
Doug grinned and said softly, "Macavity, you're a Lunar Cat.
You should be used to being a guardian."
"Kanshisha YES, diaku no tediibea NO," Macavity grumbled out.
Doug blinked, "Uh, why did you just mix Japanese and English?"
"I wanted it to be perfectly clear what I was saying!"
Macavity nearly bellowed. Terra grumbled something herself and
rolled over, nearly crushing Macavity in the process.
"He's in a grumpy frame of mind," Mamoru noted.
"I still think he's trying to handle Artemis and Luna being
together," Doug replied. He, Will, and Mamoru were seated
around a low table waiting for the Senshi to return.
"Yeah, what is it between him and Luna anyway?" Will asked.
Doug was about to respond when the quietness of the shrine
grounds were shattered by something that sounded like a
stampede of cattle. Just as the three men stood, Sailor Mars,
Sailor Moon, and Sailor Mercury came crashing into the room.
"What's the matter?" Will asked them, then he noticed what the
Senshi were wearing. A corner of his mouth twitched as he
tried to suppress the mirth that wanted to roll out of him.
"Um... sale at the mall, ne?"
Before Mars could answer Sailor Moon yelled, "Where is that
baka cat!" She gave a cry of triumph when she spotted
Macavity's tail. Marching over to the couch, she pushed Terra
aside. Macavity was about to thank whoever saved him until he
noticed he was staring at very upset Sailor Moon. She held him
around the neck a few inches from her face. "WHAT IS THE BIG
IDEA?!?"
"Ne, P-Princess, what are you talkin' 'bout?" Macavity choked
out. <Someone didn't get their nap today.>
"I'm talking about my attack!" Sailor Moon cried.
"What is amiss about your attack, Usagi-oneechan?" Terra asked
while rubbing her eyes. Macavity gave a yelp of surprise as
Sailor Moon suddenly dropped him and pulled out her scepter.
"I can only do `Pink Sugar Heart Attack'..." Sailor Moon
sniffled, yet again on the verge of wailing, "It ain't fair!"
The only thing keeping Sailor Moon from completely breaking
down into tears again was Mars vehemently agreeing. "Yeah, me,
Mercury, and Moon didn't get a power-up." She glared
menacingly at Macavity and added, "You got some explaining to
do, kitty." She held her fist up to emphasize her point.
"The Guardian Earth Stone must know something about the
future," Macavity said calmly, "Wouldn't you agree,
Terra-chan?"
The five year old sat quietly for a few moments and then
nodded. "Hai, the only reason I can postulate that the
Guardian Earth Stone would reduce Sailor Mercury and Mars'
powers would be if they were expecting..."
"Expecting?!" Mars asked, drawing out the word to a fine
point. This startled exclamation had the effect of drawing
Venus, Jupiter, and Saturn into the room. The three Senshi had
thought it best to remain at a safe distance from their
furious teammates.
"Hai, that you are with child," Terra clarified.
"Nani? That's impossible!" Mercury exclaimed.
Terra frowned. "It is not impossible, Ami-san. There are
several methods available by which you could conceive a
child."
"But... but I haven't... I mean, I'm not pregnant! None of us
are!" Mercury protested. Just to satisfy herself, she used her
minicomputer to scan herself again. "See, I was right,"
Mercury stated confidently after the scan was completed. <I
just won't mention Mars,> Mercury thought to herself.
"That doesn't explain Sailor Moon though," Mamoru added
turning toward his chubby girlfriend, "I mean, I HOPE it
doesn't explain Sailor Moon."
"I have a theory about that, minna," Macavity replied. When he
was sure the others were paying attention to him, he
explained, "At the time of the Guardian Earth Stone's
creation, there was no Sailor Moon; there was no Sailor Senshi
that represented the Moon. When it did the power-ups, the
Guardian Earth Stone looked for the closest approximation of
Sailor Moon it could find. While I'm unsure about Sailor
Moon's weight gain, her fuku shift, and attack would confirm
that the Guardian Earth Stone latched onto Sailor Chibi-Moon.
Just be glad that it didn't latch onto Sailor
Chibi-Chibi-Moon."
"Now there was a classy Senshi," Sailor Moon observed.
[Latch on...] Usagi snickered, [They'll buy anything.]
"In fact," Macavity continued, completely ignoring Sailor
Moon's remark, "That would explain your downgrades. At the
time of its forging, Sailor Mercury and Sailor Mars WERE
pregnant so they had to limit themselves to powered down
attacks. The Lunar Knights had no such problems I might add."
"I'm gonna go change," Sailor Moon said dejectedly. Turning,
she waddled towards for the bathroom, shoulders slumped.
Catching Mamoru's questioning look, she added, "My normal
clothes don't stretch. When I shift back, I'll probably rip
them to shreds." <One of my favorite outfits too...> That
seemed to remind the other Senshi of their current state of
dress and they also detransformed as well.
"Arigato Kami-sama!" Rei crowed when she noticed that all of
the modifications that Crystal's attack had made were gone. "I
don't think I could stand another second in those things."
"You? What about me?" Ami whined, "I looked even younger."
<Those pigtail tufts made me look like a baby!>
"I dunno, I think I'd rather suffer through something like
those dresses than be the size of a house," Minako commented
as she checked herself over for any extra patches of flab.
"Not a worry with your cooking," Makoto quipped.
"And what's that supposed to mean, pipsqueak?" Minako demanded.
"I'm just saying, Mina, that there's no way you could cook
anything edible." <You almost killed poor Will.>
"I can cook anything you can cook!" Fearing what was coming
next, both Ami and Rei slipped out of the room to go and check
on Usagi.
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah!" Minako replied, "We'll have a cook off. The guys can
be the judges."
"I think I'll go find Usako," Mamoru replied.
"We'll come with you!" Will and Doug hurriedly added together
but it was too late, the doorway was blocked. Their fate
sealed.
While the guys were feeling rather unhappy at that point,
Usagi was very happy in a way. She sat on the floor, arms
wrapped around her stomach moaning. It appeared that all of
the ice cream she had inhaled was giving her a major
stomachache. On the upside of things, she was her old thin
self again.
[Nani? What gives, Miko-chan?] Usagi asked, [I was gonna keep her fat.]
['Sagi,] Misako said after a moment, [I think you're getting a little
too carried away.] When Usagi gave her a puzzled look, she continued,
[We wanted to get revenge; we didn't really want to hurt them. I think
you're being a little mean, Imouto.]
[But she...] Usagi began.
[Is our mother, and you know she cared about us in the past,] Misako
interrupted. When Usagi crossed her arms, Misako decided to try a
different approach. [We're Sailor Senshi, 'Sagi-chan, and so are they.
If we make them look bad, it reflects badly on us... on ALL Senshi, ne?]
[I guess you're right, Miko-chan,] Usagi conceded after a moment of
thought, [I wasn't trying to be mean. I thought it was just funny.] She
gave a small smile while adding, [I found a picture of Mother one time
that Luna drew. It was pink and pretty fat.]
Misako smiled as well. [What if it's only when she transforms?] she
compromised.
After thinking about it for a long moment, Usagi agreed, [That sounds
good, Onee-chan.] She glanced over at Misako for a moment and asked, [So
what did Yuki want?]
[Nothin' really,] Misako answered, [You can write some now. But you
might want to give the Senshi a break.]
[No promises,] Usagi replied while taking the pad and pencil.
Mamoru entered into the bathroom at that point and bent over
his prone girlfriend. "Usako, are you all right?" His voice
was filled with concern.
"Oh Mamo-chan," Usagi whined as she reached upwards towards
him, "My tummy hurts. I ate too much." She pouted slightly and
added, "I haven't done that in such a long time!" The others
rolled their eyes. Mamoru helped her stand and she hugged him,
leaning into his warm and sturdy frame. "What if I get fat?!"
Usagi began worriedly, "You'd hate me!"
"Don't be silly, Usako," Mamoru chided.
"But Mamo-chan, what if I eat too much and blow up like a
balloon?!? I'd be so embarrassed about it and... well, I
always though you loved me for my figure since I'm not really
that smart."
"Usako, I don't think you're dumb. You are a very caring
person. If you get big, then I'll just have more of you to
love is all."
This was obviously not the correct thing to say as Usagi
wailed, "BUT I DON'T WANNA BE FAT!!!!" Hiding her face against
him, Usagi continued to wail while babbling out, "I wanna be
pretty and slim and nice looking. I don't have the
intelligence to compete with Ami."
"NANI?!?" Mamoru, Ami, and Rei demanded together.
"Well," Usagi sniffled out when Mamoru pushed Usagi slightly
away to look at her sternly, "I mean, Mamo-chan, you're such a
brain. Why wouldn't you be attracted to somebody that can
understand you?" Rei immediately flitted her gaze towards Ami
who was looking slightly ill.
"Usako, I love you with all my heart," Mamoru said in great
earnest, "And I'm not as intelligent as you might think."
Usagi blinked in confusion.
"I thought you had a high IQ," Ami stated. Rei furiously
shushed her.
Mamoru smiled at Ami who blushed and the still glaring Rei
before turning his attention back to Usagi. "If I was so
intelligent, why did my future self do such a baka thing as to
break us up?"
"But that was necessary, ne?" Usagi pointed out.
[Typical,] Misako muttered out.
[Hai!] Usagi replied.
"Even if it was, our love has seen us through far worse
situations," Mamoru remarked softly. He pulled her up and
started kissing her deeply. Usagi's world drifted as her
strong and handsome prince once again swept her into the
private world that only they alone shared.
The seconds seemed to stretch on forever until there was a
soft cough. As Mamoru pulled away, Usagi gave a deep sigh and
stared dreamily at her finance. "I'm sorry to interrupt,"
Hotaru said, "But I wanted to see how Usagi-chan was doing."
"I think I'm okay." Usagi gave a little gasp then, "Well maybe
not." Her stomachache had returned with a vengeance.
['Sagi...] Misako prompted softly. Usagi gave a disgusted snort and
tossed her sister the pad and pencil. Misako sighed and picked up the
discarded items before starting to write.
"I'll go see if Hino-ojiisan has anything for stomachaches,"
Mamoru said after giving Usagi another small kiss.
"Are you all right, Usagi?" Rei asked, "I told you not to eat
all that ice cream."
"I know, Rei-chan," Usagi moaned, "But it looked so good and I
was SO hungry." She let out a little groan and leaned against
a wall. The room was starting to spin.
Hotaru gave a worried look at Usagi for a moment then looked
at Ami and asked, "If Crystal can shake off a Sailor Planet
Attack, what are we going to do?"
"I never got a good reading on her," Ami replied, "The
Ginzuishou interfered with my scans." When her friends gave
her blank looks, she explained further, "The power that
Crystal is harnessing is similar to yours. Usagi seems to
thrive on `love power' while Crystal thrives on `kawaii
power'."
No sooner had Ami's words left her mouth, then Usagi launched
herself at the toilet and started retching in great shaking
heaves. Hotaru turned a sickly shade of green and ran from the
room. Ami turned away, trying to block out the noise and
smell. Rei stood in fascinated horror before moving to support
her friend.
"I think I'm a little late," Mamoru commented from the
doorway. Usagi hacked and coughed for a moment or so before
washing her mouth at the sink. Standing, she turned around and
noticed Mamoru was regarding her with deep worry and concern.
"Are you sure you're okay, Usako?"
"Hai!" Usagi chirped sounding as if nothing had happened, "Say
I'm hungry. Can we go out for pizza?" As her friends' eyes
bulged, Usagi's stomach rumbled hungrily at the sound of food.
[Now write,] Misako commanded to Usagi who took the pad and pencil. [You
know you don't like stomachaches either.]
[Yeah,] Usagi admitted, [It's just...]
[Imouto, a little good-natured revenge is one thing but hurting Usagi is
another.] Misako sighed a little and added, [I thought we settled this.]
[Miko-chan, you actually want to forgive Mother?] Usagi asked in
surprise.
Her brusque tone didn't fool Misako in the slightest but wanting to not
linger on the subject, simply answered, [If Mother is willing to do what
Dad did... There isn't any reason why we shouldn't if she takes
responsibility.] Usagi didn't reply seeming unconvinced. Instead, she
turned her efforts to the story.
Usagi and the other Senshi, along with Will, Doug, and Mamoru
arrived later that evening at the Tsukino home and were quite
surprised to see the other parents of the Sailor Senshi
waiting for them.
Ami's mother, Hino-ojiisan, Kenji, Ikuko, Shingo, and
Professor Tomoe were seated around the living room. As Usagi
and company entered the living room, the conversation came to
a halt as the faces of parents turned to regard their children
critically.
"Mom?" Usagi asked quizzically, "What's going on?"
"We're having a little chat, dear," Ikuko said, "At the
moment, we were talking about how the girls didn't have much
choice in hanging around you because you're their princess."
Usagi sputtered for a moment before demanding, "And why
wouldn't they want to hang around me?"
"Because we're afraid you'll drag down their grades," Dr.
Mizuno responded acidicly, "Do you know how hard my Ami works
at school?"
"Ami's a good friend!" Usagi retorted, "And I do NOT drag her
grades down, ne Ami-chan?" Usagi asked as she turned to regard
her friend.
"Um... Well, I did get an A- on my last test," Ami admitted
slowly. Usagi almost thought Ami's mother was having a heart
attack if the pained expression on her face was any
indication.
"I am so truly sorry about that, Mizuno-sensei," Ikuko said
apologetically while bowing, "I know Usagi's been quite a
burden to your mesu... er, your musume." Usagi was rather hurt
by that statement. Her bottom lip began to tremble but her
mother's stern look halted the wail before it even escaped her
throat. "Gomen nasai. Please accept our family's apology. I'm
sure Usagi does mean well."
"It could be worse," Kenji chimed in, "Before Chibi-Usa and
Misako came from the future, Usagi would never study." He gave
his daughter a grin and added, "Maybe they should come back to
motivate you even more."
"NO WAY!" Usagi replied, "There's enough people in this house
without my children coming here to harass me."
"Speaking of children," Hino-ojiisan inserted as he eyed Rei
critically, "How many children do you have?" Rei started to
protest that she didn't know what he was talking about but he
interrupted by saying, "Come now, Rei-chan, if Usagi can
produce children, you certainly could."
"Well... uh Ojii-san... I've got sixty-three."
While the other parents gave exclamations of surprise at this
number, Hino-ojiisan simply nodded. Shingo couldn't help but
mutter, "Maybe SHE should be named Usagi." Ikuko gave her son
a quelling look so Shingo subsided.
"And you, Hotaru-chan?" her father asked almost desperately.
"I don't know, Otou-san," Hotaru said with all honesty.
"I don't know whether to be relieved or worried," Professor
Tomoe remarked. Then smiling, he added, "But at least you
aren't spending all of your time with those two criminals."
"Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama are not criminals... just
misunderstood," Hotaru countered. When her father lifted an
eyebrow, she added, "Well at least Michiru isn't a criminal."
Professor Tomoe grunted slightly.
"Well I suppose Usagi could be a decent onee for you... if she
works hard," Hotaru's father conceded resignedly to his ten
year old daughter, "I mean at least she has the redeeming
feature of being Sailor Moon and the future Queen. Maybe your
influence can help mature her, Hotaru-chan."
"Instead of being entirely hopeless," Shingo quipped.
"EVERYBODY knows about us?" Usagi asked in a horrified
sounding voice. Then Shingo's words registered. She turned
around to glare at her brother who was trying to look innocent
and failing miserably.
"Hai, of course," Ikuko replied with some exasperation, "We're
parents, Usagi. Once Hino-ojiisan mentioned about Rei being
Sailor Mars and showed me the list Ami wrote up..."
"Tsukino-san," Minako interrupted in a small voice, "Where are
my parents?" Will breathed a silent sigh of relief they
weren't in attendance. <At least, they don't know I'm a
Senshi.>
"They usually attend our meetings but I believe they had to
run errands today. They may be by later," Ikuko replied, "Now
come in and sit down we have a lot of things to discuss."
"I think we'll go," Doug suggested, "We'll see you tomorrow,
minna-san." Bidding his good-byes, he hurried from the house.
Mamoru and Will were not long in following suit.
Makoto, at first, wasn't sure whether she should stay or not
but Ikuko insisted that she should stay. "Come now,
Makoto-san, just because you don't have any parents doesn't
mean nobody cares about you."
[It's sad not having any family,] Usagi said softly, [I mean, I feel
sorry for Makoto in a way.]
[I felt really bad about leaving her in the past,] Misako replied, [It
was so much better not to remember who I was too, Onee-chan. I really
thought I was her niece.]
Usagi blinked and after a moment of silence said, [You didn't tell me
that.]
Misako shifted and sighed, [Well, I will but let's finish this first.]
Usagi shrugged. Eventually Misako would tell her and she wasn't in any
hurry.
No amount of begging could avert the cook off that was
scheduled to take place two days later. It had been planned
for the day before but Doug had already been recruited by
Terra to show up in a rabbit costume for her play. He did this
without complaint; he would gladly endure the ribbing he was
taking from Makoto and the other girls rather than suffer
Will's fate.
While nothing came close to the deadliness of Minako's
cooking, shopping with her for the various ingredients was
only slightly less hazardous. It appeared that Minako's bad
karma around electrical appliances carried over to other
things as well. How Minako's parents ever kept their
refrigerator in tact was a mystery to him. He thought
seriously of staying in his Prince Bauxite armor for his own
protection.
The mere fact that he actually tried to prolong the shopping
trip showed how much he wanted to avoid meeting Minako's
parents again. Will had fortunately missed them the day before
at the Tsukino's. Taking Kenji's advice, Minako's parents had
given their daughter an ultimatum, either bring home "that
boy" or be sent to a private girl's boarding school in
England.
Minako had, at first, thought the idea of going back to
England rather good. She'd be away from her parents and surely
Will would follow. It had taken the other Senshi a good deal
of effort to convince Minako to stay.
[Ne, what's the matter?] Usagi questioned her sister. Misako gave a
slightly yelp of surprise before blushing. [Moon to Earth, come in
Earth.] Usagi giggled as Misako's blushed deepened. [You've been staring
at that page for five minutes.]
[I just can't think of anything, Onee-chan,] Misako admitted.
[Then give it to me,] Usagi commanded lightly while holding out her
hand. Misako obliged and handed both pad and pencil over. [Hmmm... now
let's see here...]
Crystal was sitting on her bed in her bunny pajamas, Rei-chan
#2 hugged tightly against her chest. "I'm all alone," Crystal
pouted softly, "'Cept for you, Rei-chan." The teddy bear
remained silent. "It's so bad and lonely here." She continued
talking to her companion, "I wish somebody would come and
visit."
Lifting up Rei-chan #2 so she was at eye level, Crystal asked,
"Could I have a sleepover?" She tiled her head slightly as
listening before pouting slightly, "Please Rei-chan...?" she
begged, "I'll be good, pretty please?" After another moment,
Crystal gave a squeal of delight before jumping up from the
bed and dancing around the room. "You're the bestest,
Rei-chan!" Crystal declared as she hugged her friend.
"I know who I'll ask too!" With that declaration, Crystal
skipped over to her desk where a phone sat. "Hmmm... I hope
they're done eatin' supper," Crystal mused as she picked up
the phone and started dialing.
The phone was answered on the third ring by a voice that said,
"Moshi moshi, Tsukino residence."
"Usagi-chan?" Crystal said tentatively, "It's Crystal."
"I'm not talking to you," the irritated voice replied before
the phone was hung up rather loudly.
<That wasn't very nice.> Crystal stared at the receiver for
several seconds before dialing again. <Nah, we're still
friends.>
This time it was answered by a deep male voice. "Moshi moshi."
"Tsukino-san?" Crystal asked tentatively.
"Hai, speaking," the voice replied.
"This is Crystal. Could I talk to Usagi please?"
There was a lengthy pause in which Crystal could overhear what
seemed like an argument between Usagi and her father. After
another few moments, a new voice came on the line and said,
"Yeah Crystal?"
"Are you really mad at me, Usagi-chan?" Crystal asked, a
quiver in her voice.
"You hurt me!" Usagi roared, causing Crystal to flinch.
"But that was 'cuz you're a Senshi. Gomen," Crystal replied,
"I could make it up to ya." <Rei-chan has a nice bunny friend
she can play with.> There was a long silence on the other end
before Usagi grunted slightly. "I do like you as a friend."
That admission surprised Crystal slightly.
"Well... What did you have in mind?" Usagi asked, sounding
less irritated.
"Um... I thought maybe we could have a sleepover at my place.
It'll be lotsa fun. We could eat food 'n' watch anime 'n'..."
"Food?" Usagi interrupted. When Crystal confirmed that there
would indeed be food, Usagi replied, "I'll be right there,
Crystal-chan!"
"But..." Crystal began but was cut off by the click of the
phone, "She doesn't even know how to get to my place." She
replaced the phone and was about to get up when the phone
rang. She couldn't help grinning when she answered the phone
and heard Usagi asking for directions.
If the heavy clouds that hung to the east were any indication,
the following day wasn't going to be pleasant. <Not,> Will
thought as he drove through the streets of Tokyo, <As if
tomorrow would be any more pleasant with the sun shining.> As
he stopped at a red light, he felt a dull pain and he regarded
his left hand which had a large bandage across it.
<God help me if Minako and I marry. Maybe in a few years,
she'll...> Will thought sourly as he continued driving again,
<I owe Doug a large chunk of money. Minako's been banned from
more food stores than I care to even count...> He winced as he
recalled the several spectacular explosions that Minako had
generated. <'Til death to us part might be quick with Minako
around.>
Not that Will didn't care deeply about Minako, it's just he
was indulging himself in a little self-pity. <And after that
conversation with the Aino's...> That was even worse.
Thankfully that had given him an excuse not to hold the
impromptu cook off that evening. <Doug doesn't have to go what
I have to go through!>
Doug would likely dispute that statement. While he might not
suffer from the same cause, he was suffering a similar amount
of pain. Terra had run him ragged. As he sat on the couch
vaguely aware of what was playing on the television set, most
of his body was crying out. As one author put it, he was
feeling muscles he didn't even know existed.
He briefly glanced down to where Terra was curled up on the
couch. His mind vaguely considered carrying her up to her
bedroom but even the thought hurt. Terra had refused to go to
bed until Will had returned home. The little girl was under
the impression that Minako's parents would cause her big
brother some type of bodily harm. Doug snorted at the
implication, <Minako's more dangerous than her parents.>
Sighing disgustedly, more because a little kid had more energy
than he did, he sighed and closed his eyes.
<Maybe I'll be abducted by aliens,> Doug thought, <That way, I
won't have to eat Minako's cooking.> He had already agreed
though so he might as well see it through. <Poor Will, stuck
with Minako's bill for damages; then he also has to pay for the
food she'll use and pots and pans.> That last bit puzzled him.
<We have a perfectly good kitchen here. Why Minako needs new
pots and pans to cook is a mystery to me.>
Hearing the door opening, Doug, with great reluctance, lifted
himself off of the couch and walked into the hallway. "Will? I
wouldn't let Terra see you like that," he quipped to a haggard
looking Will.
"Why not?" Will asked.
"'Cause she was sure that Minako's parents would have it in
for you." Grinning slightly, he added, "You can carry her up
to bed; she refused to go until you got home."
"I don't think you tried very hard, Doug," Will remarked. He
smiled as Doug gave him a sour look. "So how did the rest of
the day go?"
"I think Terra will report that she had a wonderful time."
<Where do kids get all that energy?>
"And you?"
"Mamoru looks after her until I heal, and with me having to
eat Minako's cooking tomorrow, that might not be for a while,"
Doug speculated.
"That reminds me, if we're going to vote the way I think we're
going to vote tomorrow, this will be a tie," Will pointed out
as he walked towards the living room, "That means that Minako
will want a rematch to prove her cooking is best."
"We'll just have to enlist a third party," Doug replied and
then smiled evilly, "Like Macavity." Will grinned, he liked
that idea.
Will's first waking sensation was of something heavy sitting
upon his chest. Slowly opening his eyes, he found himself
looking into the stern looking face of Terra. "Onii-san," the
child said with as much authority that a five year old could
muster, "Get up!"
Will sighed slightly and pulled a pillow over his head and
closed his eyes again. "It's still early, Terra-chan."
"It is precisely eleven o'clock," Terra said, "I have not
partaken of any nourishment yet and I am quite famished." Will
opened his eyes as he felt the pillow pulled away from his
face. "You also must awaken so that you can prepare for Minako
and Makoto's arrival."
"Why don't you get Doug to make you breakfast?" Will replied,
"Or make it yourself?" <Maybe I was better off as an orphan.>
"Because, Onii-san, he is occupied with Macavity," Terra
replied, "And I wish pancakes. Moreover, I can not safely
operate the stove at my age nor measure the proper amount of
batter." She poked him in the chest and added, "You have had
sufficient slumber. In fact, you likely have slept too much.
You will be cranky and irritable the rest of the day."
Will pressed his lips firmly shut against the retort that had
sprang to his mind. After a minute or so, he sighed deeply.
"All right, Imouto, I'll be down in ten minutes."
"Arigato!" Terra sang sweetly while hugging him and kissing
him on the cheek. Bouncing up, she jumped from the bed and
skipped out of the room humming a nursery rhyme to herself the
entire time.
"Now what're Doug and Macavity doing?" Will wondered.
"COME BACK HERE!" Obsidian bellowed as he chased Macavity
across the open lawn, "You're going to help us with this
contest!"
"Not a chance!" Macavity replied and without even pausing,
winked from sight as he teleported.
"Oh no you don't!" Obsidian declared and gathering his
energies, teleported after Macavity. He gave a cry of surprise
as he found himself in midair. He only had split-second to
take in the fact that he was over a large drop and Macavity
was sitting on a tree branch above it.
"Bye!" Macavity called out as Obsidian began to fall. Obsidian
gave a roar of annoyance and flicked from sight to reappear at
the base of the tree. "Very good," Macavity replied, "You
never could get that one figured out in the Silver
Millennium."
<Can't beat him up in combat, we need him,> Obsidian thought
so he decided to use a different approach. "You know,
Macavity, if you don't help us, it'll be a tie and Minako will
keep on trying to beat Makoto at cooking."
"So?" Macavity asked.
"So, that means Will and I will be incapacitated most of the
time." Macavity scowled slightly. "Meaning we won't be able to
fight." The Lunar Cat seemed on the verge of brushing that
aside so Obsidian added, "That'd mean the Sailor Senshi would
be able to show up the Lunar Knights."
Macavity leapt down to Obsidian's shoulder and said, "All
right, where's that food?!?"
"I thought you weren't going to help us?"
"And give those Sailor CHILDREN a chance to outdo the Lunar
Knights?" Macavity asked, "NEVER!" Obsidian didn't bother to
stifle his laughter as he and Macavity teleported back to the
mansion.
A short time later, after Obsidian had detransformed, Macavity
and Doug walked into the kitchen. "Something smells good."
"Pancakes!" Terra declared from her chair. Both Macavity and
Doug stopped, both blinking in surprise. "Nani?"
Usagi stopped, her mouth watering at the thought of one of her favorite
foods. Misako gently nudged her sister so she continued to write.
"You tryin' to take a bath in that syrup?" Doug asked as he
walked towards the table. Terra just grinned impishly and
stuffed another pancake into her mouth.
"I think she's related to Usagi," Will commented, "That's her
fifth."
"FIFTH?!?" both Doug and Macavity queried.
"Yep!" the little girl chirped happily, "May I have another
one, Onii-san?"
"Err... Terra-chan, I think that's enough for now. Why don't
you go get cleaned up," Will recommended. Much to his relief,
his sister nodded and slipped from the chair. "How about you
get Macavity to help you... AND don't touch the walls." Terra
just giggled as she followed Macavity out of the room.
Once she was gone, Will turned to Doug and said, "YOUR sister
has pulled a bone-headed stunt again."
"What'd she do?" Doug questioned as he sat down at the table.
"Hotaru phoned just a little while ago and said that Usagi
spent the night with Crystal," Will replied. He nodded as an
expression of dawning horror spread across Doug's face.
"Hotaru would have gone with her but she was visiting her
father last night and didn't find out until she got home
sometime this morning."
"Could this get any worse?" Doug asked. It was at that moment
that Minako's voice called out, asking if there was anybody
home. "Never mind..." Doug sighed while covering his face with
his hands, "It just did."
[Here, Miko-chan,] Usagi said while holding out the pad and pencil, [I
hope you thought of something.]
[I did, Onee-chan,] Misako replied and took both writing instruments.
The rest of that afternoon was relatively calm. Except for two
major arguments, both Makoto and Minako were content to share
the kitchen evenly. Will, Doug, and Macavity had been prepared
to mount a rescue mission to save their princess but that plan
had been squashed by the appearance of Usagi at the mansion.
She seemed quite upbeat about the entire affair and was rather
shocked when Hotaru lectured her about going off to visit the
enemy alone. Not even Rei's wrath about Usagi's actions could
halt the cooking contest and by the time that it was time to
judge, the judges had to be dragged to their seats.
"You may go first, Mako-chan," Minako suggested pleasantly to
Makoto.
"No way," Makoto replied with a shake of her head, "You're the
challenger, Minako-chan, you go first." Minako seemed about to
protest but then simply nodded.
"Here ya go," Minako said as she set three dissimilar looking
dishes in front of the three judges. "Now eat up." She gave
Doug, Macavity, and especially Will a winning smile.
<Is it still alive?> Will thought as he poked at his plate.
The contents looked like Minako had skimmed a stagnant pond.
"Minako-chan, what's it supposed to be?"
"Duck on la range," Minako replied sweetly, "That's French
y'know." Seeing the questioning looks that the men and cat
were giving her, she added, "We decided to do the French thing
'cause it's hard and it'll show off MY natural talent for
cooking." Makoto snorted at this but didn't make any further
comment.
Doug sniffed at his plate and immediately regretted it as a
powerful odor overpowered him. "Did you put shoe polish in
this?"
"Iie, Doug-chan," Minako retorted a scowl creasing her face,
"I put a little licorice into the pot." Doug still thought it
smelt like shoe polish but he kept quiet.
"I think it's still alive," Macavity replied as he cocked his
head to listen, "I think I hear its death throes."
"EAT!" Minako roared, her towering flaming visage looming over
the three males. With great reluctant, they took a portion of
the food and tasted it. After a long moment of silence, Minako
beamed a hopeful smile toward her boyfriend and asked, "What
do ya think?"
"It's ah... different," Will replied starting to turn green.
Macavity turned to look at Doug and ventured, "What do you
think, Doug, level four biohazard?" Minako glared angrily at
Macavity.
"I'm still tryin' to sw'llow it," Doug mumbled around the
food.
"All right you two, give me your real opinion," Minako
prompted while scowling at them. <I know they're just
kidding before.>
"I'd rather suck on Beryl's big toe than eat this," Macavity
stated emphatically.
"Nani? Beryl's dead," Usagi pointed out.
"My point exactly," Macavity replied.
"Doug?" Minako asked.
Doug somehow managed to swallow the "food". Taking a long
drink of water, he blinked away the tears that came to his
eyes. "I think you should have left out the licorice,
Minako-chan." Minako pouted. "It ruined the effect." Doug
tried again but Minako pouted even more.
"You guys have a drink and then, you can taste the real
thing," Makoto stated. While Doug and Macavity looked relieved
to finally being able to get some decent food, Will tried to
restrain his anticipation.
Makoto's presentation was almost a complete reverse of
Minako's. Not only was the food identifiable but the smell was
very enticing. Will's self-control slipped for a moment and he
looked eagerly at the food. Minako sat, arms crossed, a deep
scowl marring her features.
"Canard a l'orange a l'Makoto... Dig in, boys," Makoto
prompted. It didn't take much more than that for the judges to
devour the food. While Macavity nearly inhaled the food, Doug
ate a more leisurely pace; he wanted to savor the food. Will
was in the untenable position of having to feign reluctance.
"That was great!" Macavity declared, "Do you have any more?"
He was gratified when Makoto handed him another plate filled
with the delicacy. Usagi wasn't going to be left out either.
"I agree, that was excellent," Doug said, "And I never thought
of having duck... er... canard before."
"What about you, Will-chan?" Minako asked softly.
"Um, well Minako-chan, I um..." Will paused. <I can't hurt
Minako's feelings. Look at those eyes...> After glancing
between both girls, he continued speaking, "I find this type
of thing a little too rich for my tastes."
"What's that suppose to mean?" Makoto demanded.
Before Will could answer, Doug and Macavity let out a groan
and toppled to the floor. Will had only a brief moment to
glance over before he too was gripped in vicious pain and
collapsed. He was vaguely aware of some shouting and being
carried but eventually, he sank into the welcomed blackness of
unconsciousness.
End of Chapter 8
Coming next in Chapter 9 - The Sister of All Battles