Ahh, another purely delightful chapter... many thanks.

A few stray comments:

	Hotaru looked up and smiled as Setsuna entered the room.  The
Mistress of Time was wearing, of all things, an apron on over a t-shirt
and a pair of jeans.  The t-shirt had a cartoon of a clock face with
paws, a tail, and a large jaw chasing a salaryman up a tree.  The
caption read "Time's A Bitch."  One of Haruka's gifts, obviously.

I'm not sure whether the apron, the t-shirt or the jeans merit the "of
all things" more. :)  You should remove the "on" after "apron", though --
it doesn't really fit after "was wearing".

	Setsuna's hand paused for a moment, then resumed its stroking
motion.  Hotaru did not look up, so no one noticed one tear escape
Setsuna's eye.

You keep on very subtly humanising Setsuna.  I like it.  nicely done.

	Izuko tried not to wince.  She was a very competent, highly paid
mercenary.  Such people do not wince simply because their employer is
acting like a teenager impatient to hear the latest gossip.

Yes!  My favourite supporting character is back!
I still remember that perfect line from chapter 1: "I am the reasonably
well dressed Izuko!  I work for cash! I'm outta here!"  How could one
not fall in love with a character who can say that?

	Bob the Star Dragon yawned prodigiously.  "It's not my fault you
made a scene at that dojo," he pointed out.

	"You COULD have told me that you were hovering by the BATHROOM!"
Derith hissed trying not to lose his balance.

	"I thought you would have noticed the steam."

	"In summertime?!"  The branches shook as Derith once again almost
fell out of the tree.  With a yelp he grabbed a thin branch with both
hands.

	"-I- noticed," Bob said smugly.

	"You also got singed by her boyfriend's chi attack," Derith said,
with a slight zing to his tone.

Hmm, well, Ranma and the Nerima gang did appear way back in the prequel to
this, "Symphony of the Planets".  Good to see things are still crazy in
Nerima-Z.

	Minako, for her part, was watching Noriko go.  "No wonder she likes
Haruka so much..."

How PERFECTLY ironic.  :)

	The Captain, a red-haired, red-bearded, red-faced man of
indeterminate age, sat nearby in a crude wheelchair shaped like a boat.
"Och!  You have a woman's legs, m'lord!" he exclaimed.  "I'd wager those
legs have never been sheared clean off by a falling mast and fed to the
byakhee while you watch!"

Blackadder meets SMZ?  I guess it's true -- there is NO crossover too strange
to be written.  (And does Tom Baker get a royalty for the cameo? :) )

	"Och!  You have a woman's bottom, m'lady!" the Captain began.

	Pausing, the woman shook the mentioned part of her body at the
Captain and winked.  "I should hope so," she purred.

Actually, I think this falls a little flat.  I'd say it really needs at
least one more intervening "You have a woman's ..." line for the final
comeback to really stand up well.

	Surprisingly (or not, since this is Sailor Moon and you probably
expected this ever since you saw the crescent moon, right?) the cat
spoke.

I'm of two minds about this.  It's funny ... but it's also rather
disconcerting, too much of a break of the fourth wall.  You'd probably
be better off without it.

	Minako adjusted the lacy almost-nothing she was wearing and winked
at her roommate.  "You worry too much, Hime-chan.  Of COURSE it will
work!  My plan is perfect!"

[snip]

	Himeko put both hands on her hips and glared at her roommate.  "You
forgot, didn't you?  How could you forget the dorm mother?  You know
she's supposed to prevent what you plan to do."

	"Of course I have a plan!"

	"I have a bad feeling about this," Himeko groaned.

I had a bad feeling about it the moment she said her plan was perfect,
and Himeko should have too...

	"Great," Rei groused.  "She must have gotten her talisman and is
going nuts with it."  She held her henshin stick up.  "Mars Crystal
Power, Make Up!" she said, transforming to Super Sailor Mars.

	"Neptune Planet Power, Make Up!" Michiru cried, transforming to
Sailor Neptune.

Y'know, one of these days the Outer Senshi are finally going to get a
power-up.  One of these days...

	"Finally lost her," he said before spotting Pluto.  "Pluto-chan!"
he exclaimed.

	"Lord Eien," she said neutrally.

	He ran to her side and bowed courteously.  "It has been too long
since your loveliness has graced Avalon, my dear," he said.

	"I have had my reasons," she said.

Really?  I can't IMAGINE what they might be... :)

	Mars turned red and opened her mouth to deny it... then turned
away.  "It's not like that," she said quietly.  "It cannot EVER be like
that.  She is for Him... and He is for Her.  Maybe in some other world,
in some infinite future it could be, but I would never be worthy of--I
would never jeopardize their love, ever."

	"Does she know?" Neptune asked sadly.

	Mars looked at her, both despairing and fiercely proud.  "When has
she ever NOT known the heart of another?"

That ... was actually rather beautiful.

I'm not entirely sure just why the Rei-loves-Usagi thread keeps on coming
up in so many SM 'fics.  (So many 'fics not written by Chris Davies, for
that matter.  No offense, Chris.)  And yet, it's an idea that's just so
credible...

	After they left, Hibino Hikaru climbed down out of a nearby tree,
holding her camcorder with awe.  She didn't think the mike had picked up
much, but she had FINALLY gotten footage of the Sailor Senshi... and
what footage!  She was going to be famous!

That's one possibility.  Another possibility is that she'll be dead, if
Rei, Michiru or Haruka catch her...

	Had she really shot all those people and made them fall in love--
no, lust--like that?

I _really_ don't want to think about the guy who fell in love -- no, lust --
with Dr Pepper.

	The serpent recoiled, screaming in agony as a katana sliced into
its side.  Venus scrambled free as its grip loosened and ran out of
range before looking at her rescuer...

	Vice Principal Yamamoto?

	"No monsters will interrupt these halls of learning!  Face my
wrath!" Yamamoto cried.

	"CUrSEd OrDER!" the serpent screamed.  There was almost no chaos in
this man.  His thoughts were orderly and regimented, meticulously
organized.  That made him anathema to the chaos spirit.

Another possibility you may wish to consider here is that of jurisdiction.
As vice-princpal, Yamamoto has the _authority_ to expel unwanted visitors
from the grounds.  This would probably be rather significant on the order-
versus-chaos scale.  Just a thought.

	"Your friend was awfully pushy," Noriko said, putting the case back
on her computer.

	"M-my friend?"

	"Yeah... but I had a lot of fun!" she said, leaning over to give
Ami a peck on the cheek.  "I'm going to go take a shower now," she said,
grabbing a towel and her toiletries,  She made a face.  "I'm all
sweaty."  She smiled at Ami.  "When I get back, we can do something else
fun, okay?"  With that, she bounced out of the room.

I can't quite make up my mind about Noriko.  I'm reasonably sure that she's
an android (she _is_ Udaigaku-sensei's "daughter" after all) ... but on the
other hand, sometimes she talks (and acts) a _lot_ like Nuku-nuku, so...
Hmm.

	Luna got to her feet and stalked out of the room, followed by
Artemis.

	"I'm sorry, your majesty," Usagi said.  "I'll talk to her."

	"It's my fault," Hecate said.  "I spoke to her as a Queen does to a
subject, not as a mother to a long-lost daughter.  We will deal with it
in our own time.  I thank you for your offer, however."

The whole Hecate subplot seems a bit ... pointless.  Hecate shows up, she
acts very dictatorial, Luna and Artemis tell her off, and then she leaves
again, having "learned her lesson".  Sorry, but it's a bit thin.  Unless
it's setting up something for later chapters, it really needs to have
SOMETHING to do with the rest of what's going on.

	She stepped over to the mirror and wiped the fog off it and tried
to summon a smile.  Then she took a good look at her face and the smile
fell away.  She reached up with a trembling hand.

	"Oh, joy," she said, fingering her long pointed ear.

Oh, JOY.  Lucky she's got long hair, or that'd be kind of conspicuous
in class.  I have absolutely _no_ idea where _this_ development is leading.
But I'm looking forward to finding out...

All in all -- another very welcome, very fun episode.  Congratulations!

Cheers,
Angus

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Angus MacSpon                                                Allen Gainsford
http://shell.ihug.co.nz/~macspon/          http://shell.ihug.co.nz/~macspon/