Vincent Seifert <seifertv@ccshp1.ccs.csus.edu> wrote:

{"Sarlag"?  What the *bleep*, er... I don't recognize the ethnicity of
that name.}

Mongolian... actually, it's the word for "yak." Hey, I needed a name.
:-)

	Sarlag silently grumbled some choice curse words at the idiocy of his

curse-words

Okay....

	"Yes. Thank you very much." Tofu smiled politely as he accepted the
plastic box from the flight attendant. Flipping open the lid revealed a cold cut

cold-cut {? iffy}

Pretty sure I've seen this without a hyphen.

	He stared up at the ceiling as he chewed on a mouthful of lunchmeat, and
wondered about the strange effect Kasumi had on him. Was it love? Being near her
felt like flying too close to the sun -- its radiance blinding, engulfing,
burning away his thin, fragile veneer of rationality. But today, she had changed
something. Now, instead of flooding out everything else, her light glimmered
tantalizingly at the edge of his senses. There was something there that he
couldn't zero in on, couldn't comprehend.

{Nice.}

Thanks.

	It was true. *People don't like to hurt nice guys.* Yet, somehow, they
always managed to do it anyway.

{ouch.  Been there, so this rings very true to me.}

I think a lot of us have. :)

	He couldn't let the same thing happen again. Tofu promised himself that
he'd talk to Kasumi, find out how she really felt. Soon.

{But not just yet?  Careful, Tofu, "soon" can turn into "too late" quicker
than you'd think...}

Heh. We'll see....

	"Don't worry, Pop. The life of a true martial artist is filled with
airsickness. Right?"

{When... oh, that's right, Ranma grew a sense of humor.  Excellent.}

Well, he's working on it, anyway. :-)

{"oh, about that stupid..."  :)  It's particularly amusing that it's
Shampoo, that inveterate abuser of doors, windows, and walls, who
points this out. This whole exchange dances somewhere between realism
and vaudeville.  Applause, and giggles.}

Heh. True, but she tends to be pretty pragmatic about it. I don't think
she'd do it if there were a reason not to.

{This an area in which I am glad to have no direct experience, but
I understand that the human rib cage has evolved to protect the chest

>from slices quite well.  An upward stab might be more effective, or

perhaps a gutting stroke, especially given the starting position of
the knife...  Oh, yeah:  "You!  Out of the gene pool!"  :) }

OK, will adjust this bit.

{Another area in which I have no direct experience, thank goodness... but don't
bullets to the skull reult in neat entrance wounds and very messy exit wounds?
Or are you implying that these AREN'T bullet wounds?}

Nah, they're bullets. I'll see what I can do about checking into what
the wounds should look like and describing them better.

{Wait, isn't he... oh.  Got confused with "Zhen Ben" in the last scene.
Never mind.  For a second I thought REAL ghost.}

Different character... could be related, though.

Mongol Empire  {?  you capitalized Mongol Army earlier... on the other hand,
you're consistent about not capitalizing "empire" for the rest of the text.}

Will think about this.

	*No more,* Lan vowed to herself. The Amazons were warriors, but not
stupid ones. They died in battle only when necessary.

{This is especially important for a matriarchy, of course.  A group which loses
some of its men can recover a lot faster than a group which loses some of its
women; this is thought to be one of the original reasons for human sex-role
separation, which has men do the dangerous stuff.}

Of course, they can always reproduce by Cologning. :-)

	Huang spoke into some sort of device, shaped like the bill of a large
bird.

{er... that doesn't sound like a bullhorn, which looks a lot more like a flower
than a bird-bill.  I'm having trouble picturing this...}

Will work on a better description.

doing. Think of our history. I am sure you all know of the Three Years of Hell."

{...well, we don't, but I guess we can imagine...}

Not what you might think. It's actually a reference to Ranma vol. 34
part 11.

people were unassailable territory, and always would be.

{Echo of the title, of course.  Nice.}

Yes, with the series 60% over, we finally see why it's called what it's
called! 

keep fighting, protesting loudly as Akane dragged him away. Kasumi admired his
dedication to his art.

{... even if others think it bullheadedness.  If you want to win, having
someone on your side who just won't give up is a virtue... and you can't
turn that quality off like a lightbulb.  Glad someone's cutting Ranma some
slack.}

Well, Kasumi, at least in this series, is like that... she sees the best
in everyone. Which can be a good thing... or not....

	"Akane and Ranma will be all right. They can take care of themselves
better than any two people on the planet. And Nabiki is crafty enough not to get

{"On the planet" is very space-age, Western thinking.  I think that way, but
I'm a techno-geek.  I think Soun'd say "in the world."  Your call, of course.}

I think you're right.

signed, there had been no way for her to refuse -- not without staining the
family honor. But it had hurt, and still did. Part of her always felt that Ranma
had run away from her because he had been unhappy with his mother; that Genma
had had to take him away because she didn't have what it took to be a good
parent.

{This, OTOH, is silly -- of Nodoka, not you.}

Nodoka no baka! :-)

	"Never mind. The point is, she will undoubtedly tell everyone that she
has no intention of going through with the wedding. When that happens, I will
announce to all of her friends and everyone else how cruelly she broke her
promise and my heart by unexpectedly jilting me. Everyone will blame her, and
feel sorry for me. Legions of women will no doubt want to comfort me, while she
will find it impossible to even find dates." He began to speak slowly and
emphatically. "Now, do you understand?"

{I don't understand either.  Why's Mikado telling Azusa this?  I can see why
Ukyo's overhearing it, of course, but...}

Mainly because she's been annoying him by asking when the wedding date
would be, where they'd be going on the honeymoon and what cute souvenirs
they'd be bringing back, etc.

	"Yes. My answer's yes. After all, what girl *wouldn't* want to be
Sanzenin Mikado's wife?" It took all of her self control not to giggle.

self-control

Right.

	Ukyo kissed Mikado.

{Wonder how much self-control THAT took...}

Lots and lots. :)

	Would Ranma really go to Jusenkyo during this trip? Tsubasa had no clue.
But *he* would go there. He knew a good thing when he saw it. And then all of
Ranma's women would be attracted to him.

{Oh, ick.  I had no idea Tsubasa was that twisted inside.  It's plausible,
though.  I foresee all kinds of bad things coming from this.}

Well, maybe. Trouble with having this many characters is that inevitably
some of 'em are gonna get shortchanged on screen time.

{Aw, c'mon, do the "marital arts" pun!  Pleeeease?}

Nah, too cheap. :)

	"Okay." He hung up the phone, mulling everything over in his mind.
Coincidence, he told himself. It *had* to be coincidence.

{...of course, even nice guys can hope.  :)  Cute.}

Of course, they inevitably get their hopes cruelly dashed, but.... :-)

	Abruptly, Saotome Genma walked past, barely acknowledging Mu Si's
presence. His face bore an odd, wayward smile, as if he were a cat who'd eaten
his owner's prized canary. From the numbers, he had come from the direction of
Kasumi's room. *No,* Mu Si told himself. There had to be a reasonable
explanation.

{*snicker*  Is she going to have a reputation when this trip is over?  :) }

Wait and see....

	"Excuse me?" Mu Si said, embarrassed.

{You just don't lose a chance, do you?  The double-entendres are coming
hard and fast...  :)  Giggles.}

Yeah, I can't resist this sort of thing. :)

{*blink*  Okay, that's plausible; I can easily believe Kasumi has taken
cluelessness so far that it's gone right out the other side to a Zen
artlessness capable of reshaping reality to The Way It Ought To Be.

Well, there's more to it that that, as will be talked about next
chapter.

But... Ranma's going to blow a gasket if Kasumi doesn't tell him about
this little trick REAL soon.}

Not to worry... by next morning, all of the cursed characters will know
the technique. Except one.

	Thanks for reading, and as always, I'd like to know what you thought.

I think you oughta write faster.  :)

Heh. Will try....

 Seriously, this is good stuff, and
I'm enjoying reading it.  In particular, your taste for interspersing humor
and drama appears to match mine; too much of either gets tedious, but
trading off can take a story a long way.

Thanks for writing and sharing!

Thanks for the excellent C&C!


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics