Next time, tag this fic with a spoiler warning. Not everyone on FFML 

has ever

seen End of Evangelion, much less Death and Rebirth. I have, so I was 

lucky.

But what about others? Be careful.

Naah...what ever did I give away here anyway?  For someone who never saw 
EOE, they would have never would have put two and two together...for all 
we know, they'd say this was an alternative...it is you who put that EOE 
tag there, because you do associate this scene with EOE, because of the 
reason you state... ^_^  (crappy, ain't it?)

I know I'm C&Cing a spamfic. So sue me- I'm looking for a decent fic to 

C&C,

but there haven't been any decent ones lately. I'm bit disappointed, I 

was

actually looking forward to C&Cing several. :(

Everyone boarded the bus, apparently you didn't catch us leaving.

Hmm. I take it that you had decided to disregard the original version 

of EoE,

didn't you? Oh, of course there's lot of possibilities at the end, 

but...

Now, who's making the spoiler, now...

Don't use contractions like "don't," "Can't," "you're" and so on, in 

stories-

they tend to detract from the story. Use them only in dialogue. Of 

course when

referring to people, like "Asuka's" are allowed. ^_^;

Meaning, you'd like to read simple stuff?  Not to get distracted et al?  

Asuka struck me here as highly OOC. I've seen entire Evangelion series 

so

often that I can almost immediately spot any OCCness in Asuka. I 

seriously

I own my own VCD complete collection, and to each his own, I say.  Nay, 
I decry from the bowells of my...ahem...nevermind.

doubt that Akane would have opened up that quickly, especially not 

after EoE.

Was Akane ever in EoE??  Oh, you mean she's in the EOE you saw...ha...

And is it me, or does this sound like a Shakespearean approach, and 

being used

in an Eva fanfic, to boot?

Gee...give em, something to think about, they toss it back to you cause 
it burnt their toungue...

"Anyway, I was looking for my Keiichi.  Have you seen my Keiichi?"

A Goddess being clueless about exactly what had occured during TS? I 

doubt it.

She's a Goddess after all, and she would registered the entire event- 

It's not

that hard to ignore 3 billion+ lives being snuffed out.

Oooh...ooh...guess what.  One minute you're surrounded by 3 billion 
people, the next they're gone...and a goddess would know why it 
happened, how it happened, why it happened?  I dare say not.  First 
she'd look for her Keiichi.  (which is the point btw)

Honestly, IMO, this fic didn't have much of story to it. Just pluck out 

a

series and toss a character from other series and create a contrived 

fic that

wouldn't hold a candle to the canon. You need to rework this a bit, if 

you're

intending to write this into fic (which I doubt).
Nice shot, but it wasn't much.

Honestly, there was a larger part teared off...Bell dipping her hand in 
the sea, Keiichi being dragged off the sea, she making a comment on why 
Keiichi knew nothing of swimming and that he forgot...and so on...Rei 
appearing, asking Bell why she had Shinji's powers..and so on and so 
forth...but who cares...no one writes something worth thinking about 
these days anyway...

That's all folks...

I'm leaving...


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com