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A Very Scary Bet, Rough version rewrite
part 2d: Here's....Ranko?!?!
by greggsharp, metroanime@mindspring.com
http://metroanime.home.mindspring.com
various people own the various char. no
trademark infringement is intended.
this is written for enjoyment, distributed for
others to enjoy, and should not be confused
for even a picosecond as Great Literature.
----------------------------------------------
	The Jusenkyo Guide placed the
young fruit bat in a safe place before running
out to see another young man wandering 
dangerously close to the springs. "Oh sir,
you not want go there, is very dangerous!"

	"Where the hell am I now?" Ryouga
turned around. "What kind of place is this?"

	"This very terrible, very cursed
area known as Jusenkyo. Over one hundred
spring here, each with own terrible tragic story."

	"Jusenkyo? It's real? So this is
where Ranma and Shampoo got cursed." 
Ryouga wondered if maybe that meant that
the village Shampoo had spoken of was 
around here as well.

	"Sir, you come away from cursed
spring before you..."

	<SPLASH!>

	"Oh no, sir, you fall in very terrible,
very cursed spring of drowned..." The Guide wasn't
sure how to translate that into Japanese. He took a
deep breath and decided to go with just a literal
translation. "Yellow little pudgy kind of squirrel-fox
kind of creature that fall out of hole in sky caused by
two ancient magicians dueling!"

	Ryouga looked down at himself, over
at the Guide, and very distinctly said "Piii KA!"

	The Guide blinked. "Not sure what it is. Short
version is Spring-of-Drowned-Otherdimensional-Critter-
Number-Three."

	"Pika..." The little yellow critter sighed.
"Pika?!"

	"Yes. Have mirror, just one moment sir."

	Upon being presented with the mirror, Ryouga
sniffled. All shojo manga fantasy characters had some insufferably
cute pet sidekick. He strongly resembled exactly that sort of
thing. "PiiKA!"

	Ryouga sniffled again and looked at those sparkly
eyes, that squirrelish looking crooked tail, that plump body.
Oh, the shame, the horror.
----------------------------
	Tatewaki Kuno sneezed, then eyed his
"troops" for the morning assault. THIS time, he
would have his goddesses. After two years of 
failure, he would have them.

	"You know your mission," he informed
the kendo team. "You know the prize. We shall not
accept defeat. We shall not accept anything less than
total and complete victory, shall we?"

	"But sir, this isn't exactly regulation..."

	Kuno eyed the subordinate with a gaze
that suggested contempt. "My travels did suggest
that unusual problems require unusual solutions. 
The warrior uses what tools can be found to grant
victory over any obstacles."

	"Yes, but..."

	"SASUKE!"

	"Yes, Master Kuno?"

	"These devices, do they perform as
advertised?"

	"They've never been tested, Master
Kuno. I just had them built today. Per your orders,
I found a promising individual who put these
together."

	"Excellent, Sasuke. Tomorrow, then,
we shall enjoy victory and these women shall be
freed of whatever illusion that keeps them from 
the side of the great Tatewaki Kuno!"

	Hiroshi glanced at Daisuke. "I don't
like the sound of this at all."
-------------------------------------------------------
	Shampoo ignored the small crowd that
had gathered. The charge read full, and as there 
were a lot of new parts on it, this was almost a
maiden flight.

	Electric engines came online. Shampoo's
grin faltered for a moment and she looked uncertainly
at Ranma.

	"I added a noise suppression system."
Ranma thought the neighbors would appreciate it.
He turned back to the task of putting his workshop
underground where passing eyes couldn't see it.

	The easiest method was the method he
had chosen. Two little reprogrammable workbots
(about the size of a five gallon jug) were outfitted
with digger arms and sent down to a distance of
900 feet. They would excavate the area, seal it, then
begin work on the access tunnel.

	Shampoo blinked as her airen turned
away from her, knowing from his reaction to her
earlier hug that the vision of the mind-controlled
amazon that had hurt him continued to haunt him.

	Shampoo turned her attention back to
the little cycle and shot it up to the maximum height.

	She waited until the "shaky" feeling 
caused by the hoverjets losing purchase passed,
then dropped twenty feet. Bleeding power to the
rear jet, Shampoo shot forward.

	Shampoo's grin returned as she 
leaned underneath the windshield. One hundred
feet up, and travelling at a little over two hundred
miles per hour, Shampoo was enjoying herself
quite thoroughly. Wind whipping through her
hair, it was easy for Shampoo to picture herself
as some hightech valkyrie. Or perhaps some
princess out to survey her early morning domain.
----------------------------------------
	Alarm klaxons began screeching.

	"Alert, alert, alert! Unidentified aircraft
approaching! All defensive systems ENGAGE!"

	Lady Akiko stepped from the elevator
and looked around her control room. "What is the
meaning of this? Get me a visual!"

	A large viewscreen flicked and showed
a purple-haired girl in a Chinese pantsuit on some
sort of jetcycle.

	"So..." Akiko Mishima clenched a fist
and stared at the screen. "He DARES?!"

	"Lady Akiko?"

	"He not only has that cat android, but
he's made ANOTHER ONE?!" 

	"Lady, I don't think..." The technician
trailed off as her boss glared daggers at the little
supporting character that was daring to correct her.
"Never mind."

	"Ahem. Arisa! Ready Poison One!"

	"Arisa still has the, ah, you-know."

	Lady Akiko stopped. Arisa couldn't
do much if she couldn't leave the bathroom for
more than a few minutes. "Back up pilots, go!"

	"Uhm, ma'am? You laid off the backup
pilots last week."
------------------------------------
	Shampoo swooped in, landing her
hoverbike neatly in the tight space between the
outer wall and the massive workshop. She had
to get ready for school, after all.

	"C'mon, we've got to get to school
early. You don't want to be late to your first day,
do you?" Nabiki chided from the veranda.

	"Airen go school too? Shampoo
get to sit next to him all day, is good!"

	"You're not the only one going to
school," Akane told her colleague. "And he's
not YOUR airen."

	"Akane? You're actually anxious
to go to school today?" Nabiki raised an
eyebrow.

	"Of course," Akane's gaze was
flat and unreadable. "If I understood English,
I could go visit Ken. I'm sure this is all just some
misunderstanding."

	"Yeah, right."

	Shampoo and Vanilla exchanged
a look, Shampoo grinning. One less competitor.
---------------------------------------
	Kasumi took a moment to look over
her iinazuke/little brother. Tall, leanly muscular,
with eyes that seemed to glitter unnaturally, his
long hair tied back in a pony tail.

	His dragon nature seemed to have
leaked slightly over into his uncursed form.
What she could tell from the brief hug she'd
given him was that his body felt almost like
it was sculpted from rock or wood. There had
been a feeling of smooth hardness about him.

	She also noted that he had seemed
embarrassed and couldn't quite bring himself
to hug back. Which had proved the point she
had wanted to determine. Unfamiliar with any
sort of physical affection.

	The dragon nature was most visible
in his eyes, the enlarged canine teeth, and the
slight point to his ears.

	His eyes. Kasumi's attention kept
coming back to that feature. The old line about
the hypnotic gaze of serpents played in her
mind. Certainly his eyes seemed to draw one
in. Kasumi chewed on her lip as she thought
about those eyes.

	Once this morning, those eyes had
caught her. Just for a moment, but she'd felt all
her skills and training and iron control desert
her in that moment. She'd wanted...well, she 
wasn't quite sure what she'd wanted.

	Shrugging, Kasumi tried to turn
her attention back to the study guide. She was
finding it surprisingly difficult.
--------------------------------------
	Nabiki, Ukyou, Akane, Ranma,
Shampoo, and Vanilla were walking to school
when the crowd of boys came into view.

	"What the heck?" Ranma stopped.

	"It's a bunch of boys who are fighting
us to get the privledge of dating us," Nabiki said
drily, not mentioning that they were STILL just 
going after Akane and Ukyou. This really really
rankled Nabiki.

	"They study Amazon Law?" Vanilla
blinked and studied the group with a cool expression.

	"Shampoo just got uniform now has to
get it dirty fighting stupid boys who wants date 
Amazon womans?"

	"This is MY fight. Stay OUT of it."
Akane growled as she looked over the crowd.

	"Be my guest, Akane, I know that I'M not
looking forward to this crap." Ukyou drew her spatula.

	"Can no do, Akane. They is outsider males.
Nabiki is Amazon, therefore Akane is sister to Clan sister.
They challenge you, but is not one on one. Some have
weapon.  Shampoo is effectively War Leader for this
group. Vanilla is Champion. Ukyou has shared blood and
salt with Shampoo, is sister to Shampoo."

	Nabiki shrugged. "She's got a point there,
Akane. If they want to do one-on-one formal challenges,
that's a different matter."

	"We does special attacks on count of five,
clear a path?"

	"My flour bombs and exploding tempura flakes
don't have that kinda range."

	Shampoo glanced at Ukyou, noted Vanilla's
shrug and Nabiki shaking her head. "No chi attacks?
Shampoo have to take couple of days give sisters very
special training."

	Ranma shrugged, reached into a pocket and
drew a small device out of his pocket. "I could send a sonic
beam through the center of them."

	"Not use hightech stuff yet, airen. Right now
is just melee fighting, simple weapons. Akane? One, two,
three, four, five."

	"HA DO KEN!" Akane's chi fireball
left a black streak in the ground underneath as it raced
towards the crowd.

	Shampoo summoned her own chi into the
devastating manuever she'd learned on that one world.
"FLAME ARROW!"(1)

	The five watched as a path was cleared, 
mainly by people scrambling to get out of the way of
the two attacks.

	As they did so, five other figures stepped
forward.

	"Power armor?" Ranma and Shampoo 
exclaimed with slightly more interest. 	

	"BWAHAHAHA!" Kuno stood in front of the
mecha, bokken raised high. "It is beneath the dignity of a
true samurai to use such methods, but then, that is what
lackeys are for!"

	One of the power armors turned to another.
"I dunno, lackey just doesn't do it for me..."

	Another power held up a gunhand. "Well, I
prefer it to 'flunky' myself, but it does seem to lack a 
certain dignity."

	"Silence, peasants!" Kuno snarled at his troops.
"Now, my dears, I shall at last..." Kuno's voice trailed off
as something penetrated.

	The five continued to walk forward, Ranma and
Shampoo mainly paying attention to the power armor.

	"Steam powered power armor? Look, they're on
extension cords!" Ranma snickered at such an obvious
target.

	Vanilla twitched. There was something very 
disturbing about this. An image of a huge tacky orange 
and white robot on an extension cord flashed across her
consciousness, making her wonder where THAT had come
from.

	"Daisuke, use your rifle. THAT one. FIRE!"

	Daisuke's power armor shot a high powered
stream of water, completely drenching the group.

	Akane's glare was murderous as the rhino
stepped forward, having been caught unprepared for
the wave of water. Ukyou was sufficiently startled that
wings popped out of her back. Nabiki, Shampoo, and
Vanilla merely got wet.

	"Oh no, look at my clothes," Ranma-chan
whimpered. "And I wanted to make a good impression
today, too."

	"PONY TAILED GIRL!" Kuno started forward.
He was interrupted as a small, but quite muscular, rhino
slammed into him. A moment later, carried by the force of
the charge, Tatewaki Kuno was imbedded in the wall.

	"Hurmf!" The rhino snorted and looked quite
miserably at the group.

	"Hot water!" Ukyou exclaimed.

	"Uhm," Daisuke said in his power armor.
"Pardon me, but..."

	Vanilla and Nabiki quite calmly went around 
and turned off all the portable generators. Nodding to
each other, they walked past the now inert powerarmor
and into the school.
-----------------------------------------------
	"Battle of Hastings." "375.12" "Shakespeare,
at least by most sources. Some feel it was Francis Bacon
and plagarized." "Ieyasu, who wasn't nearly that nice in
person." "Nobunaga, who wasn't nearly that nasty in
person." "1875." Ranma looked bored.

	Mister Matsudeira was playing "stump the
new student." He'd quickly been able to eliminate both
Shampoo and Vanilla, and had smirked as the two girls'
educational shortcomings were exposed. Shampoo had
been embarrassed. Vanilla had simply blinked.

	This Ranma Saotome on the other hand...

	"Thulium after 2250, Gold from ancient times
until stable extraterrestrial contact."

	"Please restrict yourself from these flights of
imagination, Mister Saotome. Gold was the correct answer."
Matsudeira pushed his glasses back up on his nose. "Well,
Mister Saotome, if you're so smart, solve this!"

	"I thought this was English class," said Akane
to her neighbor Ukyou.

	Matsudeira finished writing the equation out,
covering both blackboards in a long formula. "Well, wise
guy?"

	"Teacher?"

	Matsudeira looked smugly at the student. "Yes,
Mister Saotome?"

	"Is that a dot there between the three and the
nine?"

	Matsudeira turned, frowned, and erased the 
errant chalk mark.

	"Really, teacher, this is too simple." Ranma
snorted. "Look, it's a textbook example of trying to find
a Unified Field Theory. This is mathematical proof of a
more than a four dimensional world. Using these 
equations you come up with the answer of fifteen. Of
course, that's wrong, but that's where this goes, now
if you want it corrected..."

	Matsudeira turned, glanced at the book on
quantum theory he'd copied it from, and stared for a
few heartbeats. "Saotome, go stand in the hall," his
voice was a ragged whisper. (2)

	"Teacher?"

	"GO STAND IN THE HALL!" Matsudeira's
eyes were getting a little wild looking. "The rest of the
class, turn to page 45 of the textbooks..."
-----------------------------------------
	"Hiroshi?"

	"Yes, Daisuke?"

	"Any luck?"

	"I think I may have moved an inch."

	"It'll take us all day to get the power
turned back on at this rate."

	"How do I get myself into these things?"

	"Because you've got the hots for Akane,
Gosunkugi. That's why. Me, I'm here because of that
show of 'solidarity' the girls did. Nobody dates anyone
until this Akane & Ukyou thing is resolved."

	"Thank goodness the air vents work."

	Everyone murmurred agreement to Sanjuro's
statement.

	"Still," Hiroshi said a moment later. "It went
better than I thought it would."

	There was a brief silence. "Damn, I've got
an itch."

	"Maybe we should call for help?"

	"With the echoes in this thing? No way."

	Another pause.

	"Damn pigeons," swore Daisuke.
----------------------------------------------
	"Fi-fi-FIANCEE!" 

	Kuno stood up at his desk, his eyes wild.

	"Yeah, your pony tailed goddess, Akane, Ukyou,
(myself, not like you or anyone else around here seems to
notice (grumble, complain, grumble)) and those two other
girls you saw this morning. All engaged to be married."

	The thought to occur at that moment to Kuno
was that whoever the scoundrel, that should be HIM! He
could just picture himself, surrounded by loving wives.

	A piece of chalk bounced off Kuno's forehead.
"Kuno, go stand in the hall!"

	"Yes sir," Kuno's voice was distracted as he
considered doing this and that, and having this and that
done to him. Why he had to go find the parents and convince
them that these engagements should be switched to him.

	For was he not Tatewaki Kuno, a true samurai!

===========================================
(1)	It just looks like a Kamehameha. So does the
Hadoken. At the time that Goku first learned the manuever,
he could just break brick walls with it, and even then not
very thick ones. (Pilaf's tower held him quite well until the
full moon came up.) So don't expect these people to blow
mountains apart with the manuever. Maybe in "Fist Of 
Orion"- not here.
(2)	Petty, off on a power trip, has his own agenda
that doesn't actually involve education. Didn't we all
have teachers like this?


	Series that have been crossed over so far in
A Very Scary Bet: (this is an eclectic series where craziness
is supposed to abound, after all)
DOCTOR WHO: (UK) live action series about a time
travelling alien with good intentions and the desire to
meddle.
RANMA 1/2: (J) anime about a martial artist teenage
boy, his strange Chinese curse, and the even stranger
people around him.
SAILOR MOON: (J) sentai anime series about reincarnated
female warriors out to save the world from recurrent evil.
TENCHI MUYO: (J) anime about a young boy priest/martial
artist related to extraterrestrial royalty and the strange (often 
alien) people around him. 
CATGIRL NUKUNUKU: (J) anime about a girl who's actually
a high powered android with the brain of a cat providing the
emotional and reactive portions of the mind.
HOKUTO NO KEN: (J) angst filled anime about high powered
martial artists and the consequence of duty unfulfilled.
EVANGELION: (J) anime based on Revelations as seen through
the X-files.
RIFTS (US): a game setting/mileau of a future world where magic
has awakened, the dimensional barriers frequently fail, and hitech
and magic are used by all the various sides of a whole lotta 
conflicts. i typically keep a set of the books near the fanfic pile
for people to read during Metroanime meetings when we're showing
something that they might have already seen.
POKEMON (US): aka  "Pocket Monsters". None of the basics really
appear, but Ryouga's got some serious problems coming with him 
having fallen in "Spring of Drowned Pikachu."

         Planned:
CUTEY HONEY: (J) series dealing with an android girl, this one
a bit different from NukuNuku. She fights an ancient recurrent
evil, just like Sailor Moon does.
DEVILMAN: (J) anime series dealing with a boy who takes on
the power of a demon in order to fight demons. Akira Fudoh 
shows up after volume 2 of the OAV to join the Senshi and 
Cutey in fighting what turns out to be a common enemy.
OH MY GODDESS: (J) anime series dealing with the goddesses
Belldandy, Urd, and Skuld and the love affair between Belldandy
and Keiichi (a mortal engineering student.)
EL HAZARD: (J) anime series dealing with an ancient world.
One of the Ifurita series androids joins the cast from this side trip,
to the horror of many of the rest of the cast.
THE MOUSE THAT ROARED: (?) it's been years since i've seen
it, but there is a planned use for the Grand Duchy Of Fenwick.
DARKSTALKERS: (J) at least two of the characters are gonna 
turn out to come into this mess. One, Dimitri, is going to be one
of Beryl's competitors. With him on the side of the bad guys,
and after several of the girls, how can Frank or Talbain NOT
show up? Talbain and the Senshi. Hmmmm.

Fist of Orion is comparitively tame, crossover wise.