On Thu, 11 Feb 1999 MercutioV@aol.com wrote:

Gendo sat at his desk, carefully examining a map of
the Pacific Basin on the monitor of his MAGI terminal.  The
map showed few physical features except land and water,
although it did have a weather overlay, and several cities
were marked.  A dozen locations in the northern Pacific were
circled despite the fact that none of the locations had a
single inch of land as far as could be seen at this scale.

You know, just for fun, here might be a cool place to mention the map
coordinates 
S. Latitude 47 degrees 9', W. Longitude 126 degrees 43'. Unless you're chosing
to edit out the journal of Gustaf Johansen from this world, in which case
they'd still have no idea.

Good idea.
 

Maya frowned.  Before her was a 3D image of Rei's
body, cycling through images of her nervous, circulatory,
and respiratory systems, as well as close-up representations
of the sections of her brain.

Isn't this the sort of thing that should be highly classified? After all, Maya
isn't really cleared to know that much about Rei, and with this kind of highly

Maya is on Ritsuko's support staff, and she monitors people's vital signs
during combat along with everyone else, if I remember correctly.  And as
Rod says, she knows quite a bit.

You know..... maybe it's just me, but it seems to me as if you're going a
little overboard with the 'obscure Mythos prophecies' refs here. After all,
this IS Evangelion, and Gendo and Kouzou are supposed to make cryptic, evasive
little remarks that leave us with more questions than answers. Here, it just
feels a little too direct, like you're just giving their secrets away rather
than making us work really hard to figure them out. I'd recommend just one or
two references to the prophetic stuff, and couched in vaguer terms. You know,
the mention of Abdul Alhazred, maybe one or two of the mystic books, that kind
of thing.

To me, mentioning just the titles without the actual CONTENT is obscure
enough.  It's not as if the readers have read the Eltdown Shards
themselves :)

"You are to capture the target, designated
'Amaliel,' and bring it back to NERV headquarters."

Fun fact: For those of you interested, Amaliel is the patron angel of
Weakness.

Exactly why we chose that name :)
 

"Aah, nothing like a swim after battle," she sighed.
The three boys stared at her in awe.  She wasn't what they
were expecting, though definitely far more attractive.
After shaking her arms dry and wringing her hair, she
realized they were still looking at her.  "Oh.  Forgot to
introduce myself.  Asuka Soryuu Langley, Eva pilot for
NERV.  Nice to meet you!"

I'm almost positive that Langley is her MIDDLE name, and Souryu is her family
name, mainly because of the fact that her mother (Souryu Kyoko Zeppelin)
doesn't have Langley anywhere in HER name. Granted, Souryu Langley sounds a
lot better than Langley Souryu to the english ear, which is probably why it's
used in so many fics, but I'm pretty sure I'm right about this.

Langely is her father's last name, and she's 3/4th German, so she took his
family name.  Technically, it's Asuka Soryuu Zeppelin Langely.

Never mind that Langely isn't a German last name really, but...:)
 

Asuka is acting out of character. What's up with THAT?

Because she's had a different life.  We will get more into her family
background down the line and why things came out differently.  For now,
I'll just say that one of the critical events of canon Asuka's life was
different in this universe for reasons connected to the different nature
of NERV and SEELE in this universe.

To say more would be a spoiler.

Kensuke nodded, still videotaping.

Suddenly, his camera died.

That has GOT to mean something. Kensuke treats his electronic equipment better
than he treats himself; it wouldn't just die on him. One wonders just what the
extent of Rei's 'attributes' are....

Extensive :)
 

"The stars were right.  Perhaps it could be some
side effect of the Three Children assembling themselves.
Although I would think the Fourth would be needed as well
for such a thing."

Hey whoah, question: I know a lot is being changed from original Eva, but is
the whole "all of Shinji's classmates are potenial Eva pilots" thing still
true? Because if it is, then Kouzou wouldn't really be surprised, what with
Touji and Kensuke's presence.

Yes and no.
 

"Perhaps it's identification as a power of the
first rank was a mistake by some ancient scribe, but you
should remember the battle would have been QUITE different
if it had been a matter of conventional technology versus
our fallen friend."

THAT is a distinct matter of opinion.

The Mythos varies wildly on the amount of power wielded by the GOO, and by the
amount of power needed to defeat them. Sometimes, they come off as these
hugely powerful nigh-omnipotent things that seem as though they could eat a
nuke (or an N2) for breakfast and go away hungry; this seems to be what COAEG
is going for. However, it must be pointed out that in several stories, mainly
early ones, it doesn't take much to beat them: one of Yog-Sothoth's offspring
is defeated by little more than a special chemical compound and a ritual
preformed by three amateurs, and Cthulhu, the big guy himself, is injured

The child of Yog-Sothoth is much weaker than the big Y himself.  The other
child gets eaten by dogs, for that matter.

If those three professors had been facing Yoggie, they would have ended up
scattered in tiny bits across space and time.

Also, magic is not conventional technology.  Magic is in fact, turning the
weapons of the Great Old Ones back upon themselves.

merely by being rammed by a 1920's tramp steamer.   

Being rammed by a tramp steamer is nothing to sneeze at.  A tramp steamer
ramming an EVA at full tilt would squash it.

However, the Great Old Ones don't typically let tramp steamers ram them :)
It just wasn't Cthulhu's day.  

Anyway, I'm loking forward to more. Assuming that you'll be doing the full
angel count of 17, and we're only up to 2, this story has a LONG way to go
yet.

We have a shorter list of Angels.  13, I think.


John Walter Biles :  MA-History, Ph.D Wannabe at U. Kansas         
ranma@falcon.cc.ukans.edu       
rhea@tass.org              http://www.tass.org/~rhea/falcon.html
rhea@maison-otaku.net      http://www.maison-otaku.net/~rhea/

"Put Strom Thurmond in a headlock, and he'll listen to reason!"  Governor
Jesse Ventura of Minnesota to President Clinton in the February 6, 1999
Imagination Workshop