Aerol C. Bibat wrote:

Note: Things start getting a bit rough here, but that just means the
dawn is approaching... right? C&C will be greatly appreaciated, mounted
on the wall and placed lovingly someplace visble where it'll remind any
would be son-in-law that daddy's little girl is packing. Flames will be
forced to wear novelty sunglasses, party hats and a shirt with something
innane and moronic about rather large Johnsons. Yes, you can MST it too
if you like ^_^

Wow, you really gonna do that ? ^_^

    Mount it or allow for MSTs? Answer to both is yes, though in the first
case I must clarify that I'm speaking taxidermy and nothing that would be
either illegal, amoral, or likely to cause a serious influx of improbablity
and the handing out of contraband smoking material.

Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2 and the character there in belong first and
foremost to its creator, Rumiko Takahashi, secondly to its Japanese
publishers Shokgakukan who brought it out there, third to Viz
Communications who brought it here and finally, to the numerous fans
both home and abroad whose love and devotion have made it grow. Me? I'm
just a Parrot.

Now, done't put yourself down, Keener. At the very east you're a Parrot
that can use a computer. ^_^

    Heh, not easy, what with being nailed to the pirch and all...

<snip>

Nice imagery. Very useful to set up a feeling of peace and innocence...
which will be totally shattered momentarily.

    Allegories, metaphor, imagery and the occasional outburst on eidible
tubers are my favorite tools for getting meaning across. I tried not to make
them too abstract in this case, the meanings ethereal but the objects
themselves, very much solid... and rather fragile. Think of it as sort of a
blue period... without the clowns ^_-

<snip nice compliments... garwsh... tanks...>

<snip sidelines scene>

Another nice scene. It gives us a nice impartial view of the combat and
gives insight to the other facets of Nerima that are affected by the
Martial Arts Armageddon that always seems to happen.

    One of the underlying concepts here is consequences. The Nerimaites are
about to learn more about them then they had ever thought possible.

<snip Ryouga scene>

Very nice. It brings across the right emotion and also brings across a few
thoughts in Ryouga's head nicely.

    Ryouga's thoughts are important in keeping him the "hero" of the story,
rather then the "villian of the week". He's struggling on his own path, trying
to attain what he believes is his egress. It's not the means or the end that
dictate a hero, but the struggle for them. That doesn't make him good... any
more then it might make him evil... that's largely for others to decide, with
the concepts being very much a matter of interpretation.

    "Heh, Ranma, we need to be more careful. The okonomiyaki shop, the
Wc Donald's, and now a bar? Why pretty soon, Nerima isn't gonna have

  ^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wc Daonald's ? A new restaurant or something.

    My on little joke I guess. In anime, you'll note all the characters eating
french fries or burgers normally have a golden W symbol on them. I'm not sure
if this is a cultural thing or a copywright issue, but I tend to just call it
like I see it. Wc Donalds... Wonald Wc Donald? Hmmm...

<snip fight scene>

One of the best fight scenes I've seen recently, other than in Libby
Thomas' "A Duet of Pigtails". It gives you the feeling of being there,
feeling every puncch, wound, etc. Alos the emotions conveyed are very,
to quote an earlier C&Cer, "Heavy".

    Heh

The dialogue's cool, too. Kinda reminds me of a John Woo movie or
something similar.

    Well, sort of setting up the clash of the titans roll. And, without a
certain LA lawyer to look smashing in a toga, one can easily subsist on large
doses of a Woo, high Phat diet. Besides, words, in their own way, have as much
effect as a hammer blow, they reach into areas of the mind and soul that a
fist simply cannot reach. And this time, Ryouga has the center stage and isn't
so busy crying epitaths that he can't get in a few choice sniper phrases.

< Snip another Sideline scene>

What can I say ? Give the man a prize ! ^_^

    Remember, cheese danishes and hot cocoa make WONDERFUL parting gifts.

The emotions are brought across. Though I'm in the dark on a few things,
since I missed SB 3. Damn Covert Agents(TM) ! ~_^

    Heh, I'll send you one. ^_^

<snip... more nice things>

<snip sideline scene>

Nice... once again, the emotions of the others enhance the main
character's emotions. A very good idea to use H&D also. They give
a touch of ... I don't know. It just helps.

    H&D are some of my favorites, they have, as Daisuke says, "season tickets
to the madness", but neither of them have even attempted to learn some strange
foreign art of side kick foo or attain the phenominal cosmic powers that the
ancients seem to leave strewn about the place. They are, for the most part,
content to be who they are... you might call them anchors of reality.

<snip>

The scenes are great. The emotions are there. You feel them. And the
dialogue's very good. Very good piece of work.
To quote my upcoming essay, you just whacked me over the head with
two-by-four. And it damn hurts.

    I have to say, this is some of the most encouraging comments I've yet to
recieve on this chapter. Frankly, I had feared that it had died an ignoble
death, deleted and waiting file compression in the trash files of the list.
Add that to the strange non-appearance this fic is making on the CORML, and I
was a mite bit on the deppressed side. Thanks for everything... ^_^

Just hurry up ! Damnit ! The excitements killing me !

    Heh, chapter 5 if halfway written, originally, the climax of the fic was
going to come a bit later, after the actual Blast itself. I change my mind on
that once I note how much material was being worked on for the next chapter.
Hope it's worth the wait.

Elsa Bibat is: checking herself for a concussion

Revenge's End Mad Bad Bishonen LadCaretaker of the Dark and Lonely Place (COR
Deaconate)
The Parrot King

(And the Moon was as blood, the Storms crashed and the Seas BOILED!)
(Typical, thought the Lobsters)
      /
 Oo
(~, )
 V