When I read this chapter a little less than a year ago, I too thought this
chapter was a bit vulgar for my tastes and I believe I replied to it that way
on your page. The word 'fuck' did not bother me as much as the other, which I
would suggest changing to another less offensive and maybe still not
politically correct term. Other than that word, the crudeness of his language
really did not bother me in the slightest, and I thought that it worked
better that way. This by far was my favorite prelude then, and now.

Ryan Erik

On a deeper level, though, I simply find the tone so very different

>from the other HaM preludes that I feel as if I'm reading a different

series.  The repeated (and, in my opinion, generally uneccessary) use
of crudities like 'fuck' and 'cunt' made me cringe in places.  This
tone of crudity which prevails throughout the chapter is my major
problem with it, and it is what prevented me from enjoying this
chapter as much as the others.

Sorry you feel that way. My intent was not to make anybody cringe. My
intent was to tell the story the way that would be natural for Ranma's
own internal narration. Ranma, while not stupid (IMO), does have some
very rough edges.

How would Ranma refer to his female you-know-what? It's hard for me to
imagine why he'd use technicalese ("vagina") or Beavis-and-Buttheadisms
("thingy") or avoid direct reference to it at all. Not only that, but
this is a situation where he's trying to assert his own manhood to
himself, so it seems likely to me that he could become more vulgar than
usual to overcompensate.

Well-written as always, but this problem of tone left me unable to
enjoy it.  For me, at least, it ended the preludes to the main series
on a somewhat sour note.  I am now awaiting the main series in the
hope that it will take some of this away.  If I'm the only one to
mention this... take it with a grain of salt, then.  Everyone has
different tastes.

No problem, Alan. You're the only one so far to complain about the
language -- and this chapter was the clear favorite among readers on my
web page -- but I respect your opinion. I'd like to hear from other
readers on this before making any decisions. Yours is only the third
response I've gotten on this revision.

And thanks! Even if we don't agree, I greatly appreciate hearing your
thoughts on this.

Gary