[Eva][Reallyshortfic] Not Even If...
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Not Even If...

Neon Genesis Evangelion characters and situations created and Copyright
by Gainax, Project Eva, ADV Films - Used without permission

Not Even If... story created, written, and Copyright 1999 by Jim Lazar

E-mail comments or criticisms to: mailto:jimlazar@earthlink.net
My other FanFiction can be found at:
http://home.earthlink.net/~jimlazar/anime
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The are spoilers to the End of Evangelion movie in this story. In fact,
it would help if you have seen the movie to fully understand this story.


Spoiler space...



















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     Shinji fidgeted as he approached Asuka after school. "Um... Asuka?"

     Asuka stopped walking a glanced back at the nervous boy. "Yes,
Shinji what is it?"

     "Would... you like to have tea with me?" Shinji asked, without
looking up.

     Asuka smirked. "Ha! I let you kiss me once and now you think we're
an item?"

     "No it's not that... I just want to get to know you better."

     Asuka shook her head sadly. "Tsk, tsk, Shinji... I'd never thought
you were the same as all these other walking hormones around here."

     "I'm not! I just want to get to know a fellow pilot better!" Shinji
insisted, but wasn't exactly convincing.

     Asuka struck a pose that would be banned in certain Middle-Eastern
counties. "You just want to get your hands on this prime piece of
womanhood."

     Shinji clenched his fists, trying to remain calm. <Why is she making
this so hard,> he thought. "Well?"

     "Ha! I wouldn't go out with you even if you were the last man on
Earth!" Asuka declared. She started laughing as she walked away.

     Shinji watched her go, his eye twitching.

                    -E-           -V-           -A-

     Shinji and Asuka lay on a sandy beach as the liquefied remains of
the human race washed up against the shore. Shinji's mom had said that
the human race could reform from the LCL, but only if they chose to. Two
days of lying by the shore and there was no sign of this happening.

     "Hey, Asuka?" Shinji asked, breaking the silence between waves.

     "Yes, Shinji?" Asuka replied, without looking at him.

     "I guess we're the only two left."

     "Guess so."

     "You want to go find some something to eat and drink."

     "Not even if you were the last man on Earth."

     "I am."

     "Oh."

     "Well?"

     "Nope, you're not my type."

     "Ice queen."

     "At least I don't masturbate over an injured woman in the hospital."

     "Err... you saw that?"

     "Yes. And that's why I won't go out with you... even now."

     "Why?"

     "You have to ask that with that twig of yours?"

     Shinji lay stunned for several minutes. Then suddenly, he rolled
over, grabbed Asuka around the throat, and began squeezing hard.

     Asuka reached up and touched Shinji's cheek tenderly.

     Shinji let his fingers relax and he slipped them off her neck. He
started crying over Asuka's chest.

     "I feel sick," Asuka muttered.

     "Let's go find that food," Shinji said, getting to his feet.

     "I said no."

     "Tease."

     "Pencil dick."

     And so they traded insults until the human race died out when two
teenagers starved to death on a sandy shore.


[End - Not Even If...]
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Author's notes/ramblings:

This idea came when I was thinking about why Shinji suddenly deciding to
choke Asuka at the end of the movie. Now you know the truth of the
segments they cut out of the final movie. :)


-=-
Jim Lazar

E-Mail - mailto:jimlazar@earthlink.net
Home - http://home.earthlink.net/~jimlazar
FanFiction - http://home.earthlink.net/~jimlazar/anime
-=-