Sorry for the fact that it was submitted twice; I sent it to myself in the
body of an email message to get the text to wrap as such.  It's better now,
isn't it?

 - WrexSoul
\/.
vvv

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-- Decode : from quoted-printable...


Ranma �: What's in a name?
rev. 1.0

A note about continuity and timeline:  since this is such a dynamic series,
it's hard to make a truly timeless fic because people are constantly coming
and changing.  As far as this fic is concerned, in the anime, it would take
place around the time of the third/fourth season.   In the manga, it'd be
around volume 9-11.  Now just a side note, I'm not sure when or if the
students in Furinkan get wise to Ranma being girl-Ranma, but in the mangas,
they find out around volume 4.  So I'm going to assume that it's no shock
to them, just as an off-note.  Also, to avoid inconsistencies, this takes
some of the elements from both the anime and the mangas, 'cause frankly I
like some parts better than others.  That's all.
I know they had an episode (I hadn't seen yet when I started writing this
one) with a new disciple, but this takes a much different path.
Also, I just want you all to know that initially this was going to be a fan
manga.  Whether or not I actually draw it depends on if I get any better at
my art, and if I ever find the time and effort to do it.  If someone else
wants to take this and use their own art to make a manga out of this, I'll
first be shocked, and then I'd want to see what you have.  Chances are I'd
think very highly of it. :)
Sorry if anyone has gotten this twice on the FFML. I had a problem getting
the text-lines wrapped, and someone suggested I format it and re-send it.
*prostrates self for everyone*  I'm sorry!

Also note, this is my first fanfic, so don't tear into it too badly. :�

*Part 1: The new pupil*

	"What's this?!" Soun cries, tears streaming down his face.
A very stunned and taken aback young man mutters "I... I wish to find a
sensei...  There is an opening for private tutoring here, is there not?"
	"Oh yes, there is!!  Please come in!" Tendo shouts, tears of joy sparkling
in an angelic light.  Behind him, Genma-p dances waving fans.

	In the Tendo Training Hall, Soun has assembled all of the residents of the
Tendo Dojo.  "Ah, everyone, there's someone I'd like you to meet," Soun
says.  "He's traveled all the way from America to train with us, and we're
very pleased to have him here."
	"America, huh?" Nabiki says, raising her eyebrows.  "Of all the dojos in
Japan, and he had to pick this one."
	"Now, I won't hear any talk like that.  We should be honored that he
should pick us to train under..."  Soun retorts.  Leaning over, he whispers
"...and you know the financial stress we're under.  It's been months
without a single student.  And he is a VERY rich disciple."
	"Oooh, I like him already," Nabiki says with a smile.
	"Now he'll be staying a while, so he'll be using the guest roo--"
	"WHAT? But pop and I were--" interjects Ranma.
	"He IS our guest, SON," Tendo counters, "and we can at least show him this
courtesy..."
	"But where will we sleep?!  Why can't he stay with the old freak, we got
two in our room already!" Ranma pleads.
	"Why, there's plenty of room-- in the living room." Tendo suggests,
grabbing Ranma's shoulder.  "Or you can get out your sleeping bags, make a
camping trip out of it..."   He leans in close, and with a dread
seriousness adds "But you know the Master does not like anyone in his room.
 And this is neither the time, nor the place to be arguing about this..."
	Soun goes over to the hallway, and invites in the guest.  He's a tall,
with shampoo commercial-style blond hair.  His clothes are formal and
expensive looking.  He stands, brushing his hair back, letting his suitcase
fall to his side, and does a courteous bow before everyone.
	"Now perhaps, if he may introduce himself to us!" Tendo says, presenting
him before everyone else.
	"My name is Francis Giovanni," the guest says, bowing before everyone
again.  "I'm so pleased to stay at this humble abode while receiving
training from Master Soun."
	"He called me 'master!'" Soun cries, tears of joy streaming down his cheeks.
	"Why you speak Japanese rather fluently." Kasumi noted with a polite smile.
	"Well, I did get the finest private education possible..." says Francis,
while brushing aside his perfect hair.
	Ranma looks to the side, acting unimpressed and grumps.  "Oh, so went to
some fancy school... Big deal."
	"Now, Ranma," Soun scowls.  "Remember that he's a guest in this house--
and a paying student.  I'll not have you badmouthing him, you hear?"
	"Yeah, Ranma. You'd think you were jealous." Akane adds.
	"Me? Jealous of him?  Ha!"   Ranma smirks indignantly.  "I don't got ta
prove nothin to nobody"
	Francis leans in close to Ranma, and whispers to him, "You seem so sure of
yourself.  Just so you know, I'm not used to being anything but the best.
And I shall not lower my... expectations for the likes of you.  Don't think
I'd sit by while you try to upstage me..."
	"Heh.  Well, just get used to it, pal." Ranma tells him, with a cocky
smile.  "'Cause I'm top billing here."
	Brushing his hair back again, Francis turns back to look at Ranma.  "Well,
let's just see how long it stays that way?"

	The next morning, Akane heads into Ranma's room.  Ranma, of course, is
still asleep.  Akane kicks him a couple of times in the ribs, but he just
scratches and rolls over.
	"Ranma!" Akane shouts at Ranma's head, to little effect.  Reaching over,
she grabs a glass of water and splashes it on Ranma, who jumps awake.
"Time to get up." she says in a matter-of-factly tone.
	"Gyeaak!  Ah man, I told you to stop waking me up like this!" Ranma
complained, wringing out her pigtail.
	"Oh come off it!" Akane barks, and goes to wake up sleeping Francis.  "Hey
time to get up... we're going to school today, but..."  Francis stirrs
slightly, rubbing his eyes.  Looking up, he sees a red-head girl across the
room rubbing her head with a towel.
	"Oh pardon me!" he says in sudden shock, turning his head away from the
half-naked girl and looks at Akane. "Is there someone here I haven't met
yet?"  
	Akane rolls her eyes, and groans.  "Oh yeah... you just kinda get used to
it..."  Akane brings Ranma over, and pulls out a tea kettle.  "I don't know
where to begin, but this is the short end of it..."  Ranma gives a start as
Akane pours the hot water on her head, and stands there panting a second.
	"I just got dried off! What's the big idea?!" he complains.  Francis just
sits there staring with a shocked expression, mouth slightly ajar.
	"And when he gets splashed with cold water..."  Akane says, tossing the
remainants of the glass of water on Ranma.
	"Hey would you cut that out!"
	"Heh, to think... that the heir to the school of Anything Goes Martial
Arts... is also a pervert!" Francis shouts, pointing at a fuming Ranma.
	"Hey!" Ranma complains.
	"This is too rich..." Francis says under his breath, shaking his head,
which earns him a quizzical look from Akane.

	Later, breakfast is being served in the dining room.  Every is situated
around the table, while Kasumi sets down a tea tray, and serves some tea to
people.  Meanwhile, Soun explains the whole perilous Jusenkyo training
mission and the curses that befell Saotome and son.
	"So you see, ever since then, when Ranma gets wet, he turns into a girl.
And my friend Genma turns into a panda." Soun explained, while taking a cup
of tea from Kasumi.  Genma holds up a large sign reading [Bingo!]
	"All the dojos in Japan, and he had to pick this one." Nabiki reiterates.
	"That's not so bad... a little weird, but not so bad... Your dojo came
highly reccomended." Francis says, reassuringly.
	"So..., you still want to train here?" Soun says, a glittering tear in his
eyes.
	"Of course.  I wouldn't leave for such a trivial thing like that.  Weird,
but still trivial.  And I can still pay, too." Francis assures him, while
fighting over an egg with Ranma.
	Ranma sqints his eyes, and pulls on the egg with his chopsticks.  He says
mockingly, "And I can pay too... That's my egg, you know..."
	"Ranma!  He's our guest!  Show him a little bit of courtesy!" Soun shouts
at Ranma, getting quite an angry look and slamming his chopsticks on the
table to emphasize his point.
	"But--" Ranma muttered, defensively.
	Genma smacks Ranma on the head with a sign.  [Show some respect, boy!]
	Drawing back, Francis, quite melodramatically overplayed, withdraws his
challenge.  "No no, you're too generous.  It's enough that your family puts
me up in this magnificent dojo... just one egg isn't too much.  Here,
Ranma.  You can have it."  Francis places the egg on Ranma's plate, while
forlornly setting his own chopsticks down.
	"But... Bu-- Aaaah I don't want it anymore... I'm leaving!"  Ranma growls,
getting up and turning as if to leave.
	"Oh, come on!" Akane gripes.  "After throwing a fit about not getting your
precious egg, and now you don't want it!"
	"I did not throw a fit!  And what would you know you uncute tomboy!" Ranma
says, sticking out his tongue.  "I'm going to school now!"
	"IF I were to sink to your level, I'd throw a fit like you, you big baby!
But I'm glad I'm above that!"  Akane shouts at Ranma while flattening him
with the serving tray and tea kettle.
	"My, my..." Francis scolds.  "He seems to have a few unresolved problems,
doesn't he..?"
	"Oh, my... Please forgive them," Kasumi asks.  "They really do care, it's
just..."
	"I think I understand..." Francis says, as Akane storms out over Ranma's
twitching heap.


	After School, Francis invites Ranma and Akane to a dinner out in thanks.
The walk down the street, Ranma on a fence, toward the Nekohanten.
	"You really don't have to do this, you know," Ranma says.
	"Oh I insist!  It's the least I can do for you all." Francis replies.
	"Come on, Ranma," Akane adds.  "It's not like you to refuse free food..."
	"Yeah, well... ok I guess." Ranma says, stretching his arms behind his head.
	Francis turns into the Restaurant, in which Cologne stands by the
register, while Mousse busses the tables.  Shampoo looks up from the menus
she was distributing at the sound of the bell ringing as the group enters.
	"Welcome to Cat Cafe." Shampoo says with a courteous tone.  "Oh Ranma!"
Shampoo shouts upon seeing him, and proceeds to glomp herself onto his arm.
	"Uh... Hi, .. Shampoo." Ranma manages to mutter.  Akane gets an angry
grimace at the spectacle, and proceeds to sit down at a table with Francis.
	"Ranma bring new friend?  Who is he?"  Shampoo asks, pointing at the new
pupil.
	"Oh him?  He's staying with us a while.  Something about being a student
or something" Ranma says, rolling his eyes.
	"Shampoo make very special dinner for Ranma and guest then!" Shampoo says
with a delighted tone, and glomps onto Ranma again.  She then heads off to
start making the dinner. 
	"It's on him though!" Ranma calls after her as she goes into the kitchen.
	"My, they're awfully... close, no?" Francis says to Akane, who sits there
growling through the same old scene.
	"It's not like I care!" Akane barks defensively.
	"That's not what I'm saying..." Francis attempts to clarify, but gets cut
off.
	"I mean it's bad enough that she jumps all over him but in public!  And
even when his fiancee is around! Rrrgh!"
	"Aw, man! I told you not to take it so personally." Ranma calls.  "I mean,
it's not like I actually _want_ her climbing all over me in public!"
	"Oh so you'd rather it be in private?!" Akane shouts accusingly.
	"That's not what I'm saying at all!  God you're uncute!"
	Akane grabs a chair, and is about to pound Ranma with it, but it cut short
as a bamboo umbrella slams the side of Ranma's head.  Casually stepping
into the restaurant, Ryoga paces toward Ranma with calm determination.
	"I'll not stand by idly while you badmouth Akane.  It's not like she
doesn't put up with you enough, Ranma."
	Francis double blinks at this turn of events, and innocently asks, "Let me
guess, a friend of yours?"
	"Hardly!" Ryoga growls, recovering his umbrella, and pointing it at Ranma.
 "Rrrrgh, Ranma, prepare to fight!"
	"Ungh?  Ryoga!  What's this about now?!" Ranma asks, confused as ever.
	"Lucky thing I was in the neighborhood!  I've finally found you, running
away from our fight like usual!"
	Ranma glows with a sudden light of recognition. "Oh yeah!  Man you're
later than usual, Ryoga!  You got lost and wandered off during that last
fight weeks ago!"
	"Weeks?" Francis gapes, even more confused.
	"Oh shut up!  Prepare to die Ranma!" Ryoga growls, charging forward.
	"Dinner ready!" Shampoo calls from the kitchen.  Ryoga picks up Ranma from
his seat, and throws him, crashing into Shampoo as she comes through the
door with the tray of food*
	"Aiyaah! Dinner all ruined!  Rrr, stupid Ryoga!" Shampoo shouts, drenched
in ramen.
	"Ranma, how could you?!" Mousse shouts questioningly, grabbing Ryoga by
the sleeves.
	"What did I do now?!"  Ranma demands.
	"Put your glasses on, stupid!" Ryoga says, pushing Mousse back a bit.
	"Ryoga?" Mousse says with his glasses in place.  "This has nothing to do
with you!" he says, tossing Ryoga aside.
	"Oh so what are you mad at now?" Ranma shouts, picking himself up and
offering a hand to Shampoo.
	"How could you!  Shampoo made a fine meal for your undeserving hide, and
yet you ruin her hard work!  I shall not permit this!"
	"Then hit Ryoga! He's the one that threw me!" Ranma shouts vainly.
	"Your times for words have ended!  Prepare yourself, Ranma!" Mousse
challenges, pulling out several chains and spears.
	"Mousse!  Stop you idiot!" Shampoo calls, getting up.
	"But, Shampoo!  I can't allow such insolence to go on!" Mousse cries.
	"I agree completely!  Fight me, Ranma!" Ryoga growls, pointing his
umbrella at Ranma.
	"Oh man, I'm out of here!" Ranma shouts while running to the door.
	"Rrrrgh, get back here!" Ryoga demands.
	"Ranma!  Stop running, you coward!" Mousse calls after him, following
Ranma and Ryoga out the Cafe. Akane just sits with a dumbstruck twitching
look.  
	Francis has an equally shocked expression, and asks meagerly "Does this
happen .... every day?"
	"That idiot." Akane says.

	After the brutal beating that Ranma surely endured, he sits now in the
hall while Kasumi applies bandages.  Leaning over, she grabs a bottle of
disinfectant, and starts to apply it to a large bump on Ranma's forehead.
	"Now hold still," she says.  "This may sting a little..."
	"What'd I do this time?  It's just not fair I tell ya." complains Ranma.
Francis walks up, stretching his arms behind his head after a workout with
Soun.
	"And here I have been hearing so much about this great Ranma Saotome...
it's a shame, really," he says with a look of sympathy.
	"Hey, they all ganged up on me!  I coulda taken them!" Ranma shouts
defensively.
	"I'm left to my doubts."
	"Is this some sorta challenge?" Ranma probes.
	"Think it what you may, but I warn you your pride is your biggest
weakness," Francis says, matter-of-factly.
	"Oh, look who's talking!  Anytime, pretty boy." Ranma confidently replies.
	"Fine, then how about six-o' clock, in the lot outside of your high school."
	"Oh, dear," Kasumi says, placing a bandage on Ranma's face.  "Please don't
go too rough on him, Ranma."
	"Don't worry, I'll go easy on him," Ranma smirks with an air of smugness.

Here there would be a shot of Ranma and Francis's faces smirking at each
other transposed over the panned out shot of the living room and hall where
Ranma and Francis were sitting from over the fish pond.  This would be the
place for a commercial break or new chapter/episode.

*Part 2: Battle of Wits*

	Ranma sits in the bathtub with a washcloth on his head, as he tries to
sort out the day's events before going to school.  Taking a deep sigh, he
sinks further into the warm water.  
	"Man, that guy really pisses me off." Ranma thinks to himself.  "I'll show
him though, after school.  But then again, it looked like he was planning
something.  Hmmm...  Better be careful- huh?"
	Ranma is cut of by the sound of Kasumi screaming in surprise.  He looks up
a bit questioningly, and shortly afterward there's a knocking on the door.
Opening it up, Kasumi peeks in, looking very nervous.
	"Yeah?" Ranma says questioningly.
	"Oh, Ranma!  I'm so sorry!"  Kasumi manages to stutter out, opening up the
door enough to see her face.  "I was taking a tray of tea to the living
room, and I didn't see your laundry.  I'm so sorry, I.. I accidentally
tripped and spilled tea all over your clothes.  I'm... I'm so sorry!  They
all got soaked!  And there's not enough time to wash them before school."
	"What!?" Ranma says, almost jumping up.  He suddenly remembers that he was
in the bathtub, and so quickly ducks back under the water.
	"Oh, I'm so sorry, but you'll have to borrow some clothes for today,"
Kasumi says, sympathetically, placing a pink pile by the door.  "Here, I
left that pair of overalls by the door.  It's only for one day."
	"You expect me to wear those to school?" Ranma demands, quite frantic.
	"Please forgive me!  Oh, dear..." Kasumi stutters, silently leaving,
shutting the door.
	"I bet I know who did this..." Ranma growls, stepping out of the tub.
Angrily he goes over to the faucet, and pours himself a bucket of cold
water.  He then proceeds to dump it over his head, and gets a towel, drying
herself off.  She then goes to the pile of clothes Kasumi left her, and
proceeds to sift through the folded stack of Akane's clothes.
	"Aww, man!  Like I have nothing better to wear...  Urk!"  Ranma's face
turns a sickly blue color, holding up a pair of panties.  "I gotta... I
mean, she expects me to wear... girl's underwear?!"  With a sudden fire in
his voice, Ranma clenches the panties and declares to the wall, "He's gonna
pay, oh is he gonna pay!"
	As, Ranma grudgingly puts on the clothes, a hidden black lens clicks away
from it's spot in the clothes hamper, unbeknownst to Ranma.

	Ranma storms out of the bathroom, wearing pink overalls that read CHINA
across the chest.  Ranma looks down at herself again, getting a nervous
disgusted look.  All of a sudden, Happosai appears out of nowhere and flies
toward Ranma, tears of joy streaming behind him.
	"RAAAAAANMAAAAA!!!!" He shouts, and latches on to the shrieking Ranma's
chest by her suspenders.  "What a cute getup you're wearing today, sonny!
Getting in touch with your feminine side I see!"
	Ranma tries futilely to pull the little freak off, and shouts, "Ah, shut
up! It's not like I wanna be wearing this!"  Pulling Happosai off, Ranma
smooshes him into the floor, and grinds him in with her foot.
	Happosai gets up, and with huge sparkling eyes, says, "Since you're
finally coming to terms with your girl side, then perhaps you won't mind
wearing this for me?" He pulls out a victoria secrets-style bra he'd
obviously been harboring in his dogi for some time.
	"I'm not coming to terms with anything, you old freak!" Ranma says,
stomping on his head, and storming off to the living room, a decidedly
pissed look on her face.  Upon entering, everyone else is already eating
breakfast, but suddenly stop and stare at Ranma with wide-eyed shock.
Kasumi pulls back, and covering her mouth, merely mutters, "Oh, dear..."
	"Alright, you jerk! Why did you do this to my clothes?" Ranma shouts,
white hot chi exuding off of him.
	"I'm so sorry Ranma!" Kasumi cries, and folds over in her lap.
	"It's ok Kasumi, it's not your fault.  Everyone makes mistakes,"  Akane
says reassuringly.  Suddenly turning angry, she darts her gaze at Ranma,
screaming.  "How DARE you speak that way to her?  It's not like she did it
on purpose you know!"
RS: "Not her dummy, HIM!" Ranma says, pointing an accusing finger at
Francis, who just sits, chopsticks hanging out of his mouth.
	"And what does he have to do anything, moron?  You're being dumber than
usual today, Ranma!" Akane shouts, leaning forward on the table.
	"Rrrr, he put my clothes there on purpose!" Ranma growls defensively.
	"And just what reason would he have to do that?!"  Akane shouts.
	"Even I have to admit you're being awfully dumb about this," Nabiki coldly
remarks, staring up.  "Even for you.  I mean, honestly, why would he?"
	"'Cause he hates me, that's wh--" Ranma says, being cut off by Francis.
	"Wait-- Akane, I couldn't lie to you."  He stares at the ground, torn look
of guilt upon his face.  "I did put them there."
	Stuttering, Akane turns questioningly to him.  "But... why?"
	"I was gathering my laundry, and I thought I'd take Ranma's too while I
was at it.  But I couldn't find the laundry room, and since it was heavy, I
set it down to go find someone to ask."  He gets a shocked look as Nabiki
hands him a microphone.  Playing up the melodrama, he stares sadly into an
angelic light.  "That's when Kasumi tripped and spilled the tea on them!  I
was only trying to be nice- and now for my foolish mistake I bear the brunt
of your insults!  I'm... I'm sorry!" he says, turning into tears of guilt.
	"SEE?!  He was trying to do you a favor, moron!  And here you are
insulting him for it!" Akane says, smacking Ranma upside the head.
	"What a fool.  How do you get off making accusations like that?"  Nabiki
says mockingly, "I suppose next you'll blame me for it!"
	Ranma gets a shocked and disbelieving look, and just stares at Francis
playing a childish innocence.  "Wha- You don't expect me to believe- that-
F... Fine, then." Ranma growls, facing the shadows, and emanates white-hot
chi.  "If that's how it is, then I guess I'll just go to school now."  She
slowly hobbles out, joints and veins popping, with a slight twitch.
	"I didn't know that this would happen.  Please accept my apologies."
Francis says, with a look of sincere concern.
	"Wh... Whatever..." Ranma says, her eye twitching. "That's it... You're
dead meat, pal." she thinks, turning an angry glare back at him.

	Ranma's walking by herself to school, with a disgruntled, oblivious
appearance.  As she passes, the other guys hoot and holler at her, asking
her for dates and saying things like that the new transfer student is
really cute.  Suddenly they're parted as Kuno charges forward, bashing them
aside with bokken in one hand, bouquet of roses in the other.
	"If it isn't my pigtailed goddess!" He shouts,  lunging toward Ranma with
a hugging grasp.  
	"Drop it Kuno, I'm not in the mood," Ranma says, stopping his grabbing
charge with a well-placed foot in the face.
	"You've come to visit me!  This initially foul day, that has been
blackened by that accursed Saotome has suddenly been basked by the radiance
of your beauty not once, but twice!" Kuno shouts, glomping onto Ranma.  Her
pigtail sticks straight in the air for a second before she plants her fist
in Kuno's face.
	"I have no idea what you're talking about, but right now I just don't
care."  Ranma then makes her eyes really big and starts to talk in a cute
voice.  "Upperclassman Kuno? Would you do me a widdle favor?  I'd REALLY
like some hand-sqeezed orange juice.  Could you please go and make me a
glass?"
	"Anything you want!  Sasuke!" Kuno commands, snapping his fingers, but is
interrupted by the pleads of the pigtailed one.
	"No, no it has to be you!" She cries, pulling her fists up to her crying
face.  A vision appears of Kuno running through a wonderful land of
flowers, pineapples, and oranges.  Rivers of orange juice flow from a
volcano as Kuno chases his ever so naive pigtailed goddess with a glass of
orange juice in their ongoing game of hard-to-get.  "You must squeeze those
oranges like you would the passion of our love."  This invokes an obviously
suggestful thought in Kuno's head.
	"I-- But-- Anything for you my love!"  He shouts, tears streaming from his
face; glomps her again, and then runs off.
	"Heh, dumb as brick.  That should take care of Kuno for at least a while."
Ranma says, grudgingly continuing on into school.

	Later, as Ranma is sitting in class, a group of students surrounds her.
	"Hey, Ranma!  Why are you being a girl today?" Daisuke questions.
	Hiroshi holds a tea kettle. "Yeah, you want some hot water?"
	"Nope..." Ranma says, looking quite disinterested and unhappy.
	"Man, that's just not like you Ranma.  You feeling alright?  And what's
with the funky getup today?"  Daisuke probes.
	"It's... a long story." Ranma grimaces and thinks, "Man, I can't turn back
like this...  Not while I'm wearing..."
	Suddenly, Kuno bursts into Ranma's classroom, charging forward with a
glass or orange juice.  "Fiends!  Cease your lecherous flirting with my
pigtailed goddess!"
	"Aww, man!  You're back fast, Kuno!" Ranma complained, her head falling in
her hand.
	"Aaah, my love!  For you, I have sought out the finest oranges in all of
Tokyo!" Kuno says, holding the disgruntled Ranma, his scene filled with
roses and oranges and a sparkling angelic light.
	".... gee, thanks Kuno." Ranma says, dumping the orange juice on Kuno.
	"Oh, pigtailed girl, to think that you're spending your day here--" Kuno
says, glomping onto her.
	"Aren't you gonna be late for class?" Ranma says, mooshing Kuno's face
with her fist.
	"How cruel the public education system is, that it drive apart the hearts
of the strongest love that has ever taken part under it's hallowed halls!"
Kuno says, tears of pain streaming.
	"Get to class, Kuno!" Ranma shouts, kicking him out the door.  As Kuno
flies into the hall, he leaves a trail of photographs, much to Ranma's
shock.  Picking one up, Ranma's face turns a pale blue.  Some students go
to pick some up, but Ranma rushes to snatch them all.  Ranma, who is now
panting, crumples them all up and catches them on fire, tossing them in the
trash can.
	"Ranma!  I- I never knew---" Daisuke says, shocked.
	"What?!" Ranma demands, then seeing Daisuke is holding a dropped photograph.
	"You pose in girl's underwear too!?" Upon holding up the photograph, it's
a shot from when Ranma was dressing that morning.
	Ranma's face contorts, and she growls.  "I should have known--
NAAAABIIIKKIIIII!!!!!!"
	Then again, from an outside shot of the school, you can hear "NAAABIKIII!"
ringing throughout the halls.

	Kuno is seen being bombarded out of a classroom with a sign [2 E] overhead
by a cloud of erasers and chalkdust. He then is nailed on the head by two
buckets, which he picks up and goes down the hall indignantly to fill.
Ranma charges into the classroom, storming past all the surprised
onlookers.  Upon entering the class he charges straight to Nabiki's desk,
whom looks up with a disconcerted look, slurping a canned drink through a
straw.
	"NABIKI!!!!" Ranma yells, taking the incriminating photograph, and waving
it in front of Nabiki's face. "What's the meaning of this?!  I can't
believe you did this to me-- just to stimulate your own sales!!!"
	"What _are_ you talking about?" Nabiki says to the frantic Ranma.  Ranma
gets a little grunt on her face and juts the picture under Nabiki's nose.
She takes a long slurp as she examines the photograph.  Looking up she says
plainly, "I took no such picture."
	"Well then who did--" Ranma cuts short in sudden realization, face turning
flush.
	"Oh, please.  You don't mean to say that... he did?" Nabiki says, placing
the photograph in the now growling Ranma's clenching fist.  White chi burns
behind him as he is suddenly assaulted by Kuno, buckets of water and bokken
flying behind him.
	"My pigtailed love!!!!"
	Ranma looks at Nabiki, stopping Kuno's charge with her foot.  "You know he
did."
	"I take back all I said-- he's moving in on my territory now..." Nabiki
growls.
	"My darling! I do so enjoy those pictures you sent--" Kuno spouts before
being punted out the window and into the distance by a severely unamused
Ranma.
	"He's gonna pay!!!" Ranma shouts.

	Meanwhile, at the Nekohanten, Shampoo finds a letter sloppily titled "To
Shampoo; From Ranma".  A sudden light filling her eyes, she bends picks up
the letter and unfolds it.
	"Dear Shampoo, I send you letter because I can't work up courage to tell
you in person.  I think you're . . . Grrrrr!" Shampoo growls looking at the
remainder of the letter.  "Shampoo stupid ever trust Ranma!  'I still want
be Shampoo friend!'  Hmpf!"  She shouts, storming into the restaurant.
Sitting on the register is another message addressed to Mousse...

	At Ucchan's, Ukyo sits in the back room, brushing her hair and tying her
hair in the little white ribbon.  Sniffing something burning, she runs back
into the foyer, and sees a letter sitting on her Okonomiyaki grill.
Fetching it up with her little spatulas, she cools it off and unfolds it
reading "To Ukyo; From Ranma". . .

	Ryoga was lost again.  He looks around, noticing a broken wall bearing a
[Do Not Break Wall] sign.  Feeling that was kind of odd, he jumps back a
step as suddenly an arrow bearing a message shoots into that wall.  Untying
it, he reads that it was from Ranma with an unimpressed look.  Opening it
up and reading it, though, his eyes burn with shock and fury.  A folded
photograph fell from the folds of the paper as he reads on.  
	"How DARE he do that to Akane?"  Ryoga shouts, hands trembling.  "And then
he has the NERVE to challenge me!"  Ryoga shouts, bending down and
examining the photograph.  He unfolds the photograph, which shows Ranma and
Akane in a very suggestive position after tripping during a spar.  Akane's
gi is slightly pulled down her shoulder to show her brastrap, which is all
that Ryoga can see.  Shock and rage engulf him as red-hot chi burns off of
him.  "You're gonna pay, Ranma!  Just as soon as I find that damn school of
yours!"

	...And so another day passes, very very slowly for Ranma.  After school,
she decides to get something to eat before fighting.  Outside the
Nekohanten, Ranma, quite disgruntled, enters with the familiar ringing
sound of the doorbell.  Shampoo looks up from the manga she was reading
with a polite smile, and turns to the door.
	"Welcome to Cat-  oh.  Hello, Ranma."  She says, the chime in her voice
dropping with an eerie coldness.
	"Hey, Shampoo!" Ranma comes in, saying with an over-familiar ring.  "I'll
have a deluxe ramen, and side of fried wonton... Gotta get some energy for
a fight today."
	"Ranma pay for this time?  No come from Shampoo pocket."
	"Hey, what's the matter, Shampoo?" Ranma asks, noticing her tone.
	"Shampoo go make ramen for customer now.  Have seat at table, Ranma."
	Ranma gives a weird look to Shampoo while sitting down.  The door slams
open, as Ukyo runs in to Ranma.
	"Ran-chan, what's wrong with you?!" She questions, slamming her palms down
on the table.
	Ranma double blinks, and looks down at her pink and yellow outfit.  "If
you mean the clothes, it's-"
	"What?  I mean this, you jackass!" Ukyo shouts, and throws Ranma a letter.
 "How could you say that?  It just doesn't sound like you!"
	 Ranma looks down, "I didn't send you no letter-"
	"Then who did?!  I want to know what the meaning of this is!" Ukyo
demands, thrusting the letter at Ranma.
	Ranma reads the letter Ukyo's holding in front of his face.  "What?! I
don't believe this guy! Ukyo, I didn't write this-- I guess that'd explain
why Shampoo is acting the way she is.  I'll explain it all to you later,
but first, can I borrow your school uniform?"
	"Bu... Well of course, but why?" Ukyo says, a little confused.
	"It's a long story..." Ranma says, getting up, leaving a �500 coin.

	Ranma runs down a fence toward his high school field.  A deep fire burns
within him as he makes a 90� turn on the fence he was running on without
even a pause in step.  As he looks down at the uniform, he thinks back to
back at Ucchan's.
	"Here you go, but what happened to your clothes?" Ukyo said, handing him
her school uniform off of the wall.
	"I'll explain that later..." Ranma said, tipping a tea kettle on her head.
	"It may be a tight fit, but you're welcome to borrow them for as long as
you need."
	"Thanks, Ucchan," Ranma said, slipping into the uniform.  "I got a fight
to win."
	As he approaches the field, there is a lone figure shillouetted behind the
stadium lights.
	"Francis!  You're gonna die!!!" Ranma shouts, nearing the person.  The
figure turns around, revealing Ryoga, holding his umbrella in one hand,
other fist clenched.  Tears stream down his cheeks as a scowl permeates his
face.  Flames of his pent up anger radiate behind him.
	"Ranma! I got the letter you sent-- and somehow I found my way here
without getting lost once!  I got one thing to say and that's that you're
so dead!!!"
	"Yo, Ryoga!  Hey wait up man!" Ranma says, trying to calm him down.  "I
got something to tell you about that letter-"
	"You have nothing you can say about it that can save you now!  Doing that
to Akane-- ARRGH!"  Ryoga takes out his bamboo umbrella and spins it at
Ranma, who sidesteps it.
	"WHAT did that letter say about me and Akane?!  It's not me who--"
Suddenly, a half a dozen daggers fly past Ranma as Mousse charges, wielding
a blur of twirling swords and flails.
	"Grrr, die Ranma!  I'll never permit what you've done to Shampoo!" Mousse
cries, lunging at Ranma with several chains and spikes.
	"Would you guys just wait so I can explain?!" Ranma screams frantically.
	"NEVER!  I hope you enjoyed your one night of lechery, because it'll be
your last!" Mousse says, thrusting a lance by Ranma's head.
	"Just shut up and die Ranma!!"  Ryoga says, retrieving his umbrella and
thrusting it at Ranma.
	"But I didn't DO anything!!!  How could I have been with Akane and Shampoo
at the same-"
	"Oh, so you took both of them at once, did you!?" Mousse accuses landing a
strike on Ranma's head with a training potty.
	"Grrr, That's not--"
	"Ranma Saotome!  Your lecherous deeds against not just the lively and
innocent pigtailed goddess-- but against the blooming Akane as well- shall
not go unpunished!" Tatewaki Kuno shouts, leaping into the fray.
	"Aw, man you too!?" Ranma protests, dodging the relentless attacks by all
three offenders.
	Suddenly, a badger statue shouts "BUM RUSH!"  All action ceases for a
second as the charging statue's head pops off, revealing Tsubasa, bouncing
toward Ranma.  "I shall defeat you, Saotome, and win back Ukyo! I accept
your challenge!"
	Bewildered, Ranma says, "Man, that Francis guy does his homework!"
	"Oh, no you don't!" Ukyo shouts, flying from the sky, crushing Tsubasa
with her spatula.  "Ran-chan explained the whole thing to me!  He didn't
send those letters!"
	"I don't care!" Ryoga shouts, rushing toward Ranma.  "That still doesn't
excuse what he did to Akane!  This is where I pay you back for my hell!"
	"Agreed! We shall make that cretinous Saotome pay for his infidelity!"
Kuno spouts, joining Ryoga's charge.
	"Are you listening to me, you jackasses?!"  Ukyo smashes the attacking
Kuno and Ryoga with the hurled leftovers of Tsubasa and his statue.  "He
didn't do any of that!  It's all being made up to ruin Ranma's good name!"
	"And, since when did I have a good name, huh?", Ranma sarcastically asks.
	Shampoo jumps down from a hidden perch, Bonbori in hand. "This true,
spatula girl?  Ranma no really send letter to Shampoo?"
	"You're damn right!  My Ranma would never do anything like that!" Ukyo
says mattter-of-factly.  Getting a better grip on her spatula, she scowls,
"At least he'd better not have..."
Ranma suddenly gets really defensive, and waves his hands in front of his
face. "That's right! That's right!  It's all made up! All of it!"
	Shampoo glomps onto Ranma's arm, and looks up dreamily into at Ranma's
nervous expression.  "Oh, Shampoo just know Ranma no really mean that!
Shampoo forgive!"
	"Oh, great...  So where is that coward!  Where is Francis?!" Ranma
demands, looking around.
	"Shampoo help!  He no get away with lie to amazon!" Shampoo chimes,
renewing her attachment to Ranma's arm.
	"I'll get him for you, Ran-chan!"
	"To spread such base lies about an opponent!  He has no honor!" Ryoga
growls, smashing a light pole with his umbrella.
	Ranma hops up onto a large baseball fence, and shouts back, "Thanks, guys,
but I gotta do this by myself...  I gotta pay him back personally for this..."

Here we'd have a shot of Ranma running off to find Francis as everyone
stands back in the field.  Not too impressive here, but I can't think of a
really dramatic shot that fits.  Forgive me, master!

*Part 3: Anything-Goes Martial Arts*

	Solemnly, Ranma walks home.  It's long after dark by now, and still
dressed in Ukyo's uniform, he turns down an alley on a shortcut home.
Stopping a second, he clenches his fists under a streetlamp, thinking.
	"Man, he is so dead!  Where does that coward get off pullin that crap with
me... he knew my every weakness!" Ramna sulks, kicking a can.  He walks off
down a side street, and passes by a street lamp, while in a secluded
alleyway, a dark figure watches Ranma's movements.  As Ranma walks past, he
turns sharply just in time to see a pail of water fly at his face.
	Ranma, now wet, shouts, "What's the big idea!?"  Francis is standing
there, in a trench coat, smiling smugly at him.
	"So nice to see you.  Glad to see you liked my little diversion..."
	"What the hell is that, you coward?!  Can't you fight your battles like a
man!?"
	"Like you're one to talk, you pervert."
	"Oh, that's rich coming from a dishonorable freak like you!"
	Francis gets a taken aback look, and with a tinge of sincerity says, "Why,
what dishonor is there in using an opponents weakness against them?  One's
weaknesses are what limits themselves!  To choose not to strike at the
dragon's soft underbelly is asking to lose before you've began!"
	"Why you...." Ranma glowers, knuckles popping.
	"For example, you're weaker as a girl, so to choose to fight you as a boy
would be foolish."
	"Yeah, but you musta not taken into account how fast I am!  Katchu-Tenshin
Amiguriken!" Ranma shouts, launching herself into the chestnut fist.
	"Of course I did!" Francis pulls out a water gun labeled "Hot", and whips
up, spraying her.  Ranma, now a boy, gets a shock from the sudden change
and falls in the middle of his move.  "I also know that you're disoriented
for a second when you change from a boy to a girl!  The balance of martial
arts moves is different for males than for females, and if you can't
balance yourself, you can't attack!"  He pulls out another water gun,
labeled "Cold" and starts squirting Ranma repeatedly with them.  Ranma
tries several times to attack him, but no matter how Ranma attacks, when
he's squirted with them, he loses his balance and fumbles the move.
Francis continues his dodging, easily agitating Ranma.  After Ranma lands
from a not-so-well placed kick, Francis swings around and plants a foot in
her gut, knocking her back a few feet.
	"What kinda fighting is this?!"  Ranma shouts.  "I gotta get ridda those
waterguns, or I'm dead!" Ranma thinks, and charges forward, getting changed
from a guy to a girl repeatedly.  When close enough, she spins around,
kicking Francis's guns away. "Ha!  Now who's winning?!" she gloats.
	"You think yourself victorious too soon.  I'm not out yet!" Francis says,
taking an offensive stance.  "I know your school's only decent move!  A
wave of thoughts hits Ranma, pondering what move he knows...  
	"Which one is it!? The Hiryuu Shoten Ha?  The Katchu-Tenshin Amiguriken?
Or even the..." Ranma says, shuddering, "The Happo Fire Burst!?"
	Francis leaps forward and slides in under Ranma's punch.  "Fast Break!"
Ranma stares blinking a second as Francis performs the "only useful move"
of Anything Goes Martial Arts... and turns a corner down the street.
Snapping back into it, Ranma makes hot pursuit.
	"Get back here so I can kill you!" Francis turns down the street and runs
into a building with a large neon sign reading "Bar and Karaoke".  Francis
runs past a bunch of startled people, with Ranma close behind.  Whirring
around, Francis grabs a bunch of pool balls and cue sticks.
	"8 Ball Strike!" Francis launches an 8 ball at Ranma, who dodges.  He then
proceeds to throw the rest of the pool balls at her simultaneously.
	"Cue stick block!" Ranma shouts, and spins a cue stick like a baton,
deflecting the incoming pool balls.
	"Karaoke Whip!" Francis shouts, and leans over, grabbing a bunch of
microphones and cords.  He swings them over his head like a flail, and
whips out at Ranma.  Ranma tries to dodge, but the cords wrap around her
arms and waist, holding her fast.  "Final Attack!  Speaker Smash!" he
shouts, picking up the amp and lifts it over his head to throw it on Ranma.
	"Oh, no you don't!" Ranma shouts, leaning off a table for leverage and
kicking Francis.  Francis falls back, dropping the amp, but gets up and
smashes Ranma's face with a microphone stand, while running out the
backstage exit.  Ranma hops along while trying to untangle herself.  A
shocked bartender shouts "HEY!" at the two strangers running out, looking
at the decimation they successfully caused.
	"Don't you get it?  The true secret to martial arts is adapting to your
situation!  Take what you can use in your environment against your
opponent, and you have that much of an advantage over him!  Anything can be
used as a weapon!  Thus is the secret of Anything-Goes Martial Arts!"
Francis shouts over his shoulder as Ranma pursues.
	"Did you say Anything-Goes Martial Arts?!" shouts Ranma quizzically.
	"I did!  So was the name of my style, until I found out that another
person, here in Japan, was claiming the same name!  My family's style is
much more deserving of it!"
	"Ha!  Is that what this is all about?  You really are pathetic!  Don't
think you're getting off that easy, though!  You've run out of tricks, so
now it's time to give up!"
	"What?  I haven't lost yet.  Like I said, the secret to success is to use
the weakness of one's opponent against them!  I know your one true
weakness!"  Ranma winces at the thought of the impending attack.... Francis
reaches into his coat and throws a dark blur of fur.  Ranma looks down, now
paralyzed in fear of the scared cat hanging off of her by his claws.  Ranma
screams a shriek of terror right before Francis's kick lands on her face.
Francis scares the cat away off of Ranma, and proceeds to pummel her while
she's on the ground incapacitated.
	"I know about your fear, and I know about the Cat-Fist."
	Ranma leaps to her feet.  "Alright... time to get serious!"
	"I know your every move!  You can't get anything on me!"
	"Oh yeah, well how about this!?" Ranma shouts, taking off her shirt.
	"Ha, like that can faze me!  That trick may work on Ryoga, but..."
	"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A
PEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRVVEEEEEEEEERRRRRRTTTTT!!!!! AND ME WITHOUT MY
SHIRT!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"
	"Wh... what are you doing!?  This is a fight, I...  Ha, this trick won't
work!  I'm not gonna hold back!"  Francis charges at the shrieking Ranma
again.
	Suddenly, Happosai appears out of nowhere, and flies at Ranma.
"Raaaaaaaanmaaaaa!!!!!!" he says, glomping onto Ranma's chest, who promptly
knocks him into the pavement.  Happosai looks over at the charging Francis
just in time to send him flying into the air with his pipe.  "Ranma!
You're lucky I was out on my nightly rounds!  C'mere, baby!"
	"Ugh, that's ok... " she says, and flattens Happosai with her foot while
putting on her shirt.  Francis lands on the ground a few feet away.
	"Ranma!  How dare you trick me like that!  And interrupting me during work
too!"  Happosai says, fuming little tears out of the corners of his eyes.
	Ranma picks up Happosai and holds him up so that Francis can see. "Hey,
Francis!  You have some beef with our martial arts school, you pick it with
him!"  Happosai reaches back to feel Ranma's chest as she holds him.
Getting an unnerved look, Ranma throws Happosai at Francis.
	"So, what's with this little puke!?" Happosai lands in front of the
recovering Francis.
	"Tell him, Francis!  Tell him how you think you're more deserving of
bearing the name of Anything Goes Martial Arts!"
	"What are you talking about?  You mean to say that he..." Happosai says,
poking at Francis's feet.
	"...That my family..." Francis mutters, getting up.
	"Wants you to denounce yourself as the founder of the Anything Goes School
of Martial Arts!" Ranma shouts, pointing accusingly at Francis.
	"This little punk?!  I'll show him!" Happosai stands in front of a
trembling Francis, his chi extending to a monstrously huge form.
	"It's not like that-- I mean, I...." he stutters, backing away from Happosai.
	"It's all over!!!" a demonic Happosai lunges at Francis, and it all fades
to black.

	Outside the Tendo Dojo, Kasumi, Nabiki, Akane, and the others are gathered
by the gate.  They're standing around, waving their goodbyes, Ranma with an
indignant look on his face, but the others seem to have an at least
emulated look of sadness as they wave their goodbyes.
	"Oh, going back to America so soon..." asks Kasumi.
	"I can't say I'm sad to see him go.  But still, this..."
	"Maybe you should stay a while, at least until you heal up?" Akane suggests.
Francis stands there, completely wrapped in bandages, barely grasping his
bags that lay at his feet.  He mumbles incoherently through the bandages,
but then decides it would be a good idea to take them off his mouth to
talk.  "No, no, it's ok... I think it's better this way.  Ranma Saotome,
you're indeed a worthy opponent.  Even if you're a pervert." Francis says,
causing Ranma to face-fault.
	"Yeah, well what about your school's name?" Ranma asks.
	"I'll think about it later.  As of now I don't want to share ANYTHING with
that old pervert..." Francis says, giving a dirty look to Happosai, who's
sitting cross legged on Genma's head.
	Smoking his pipe contently, he grumbles, "Hmph!  You're just jealous you
lost."
	"Well, take care of yourself..." Kasumi says, waving goodbye.
	"Send us a postcard!" Akane says cheerily.
	"And lots of souvenirs!" Nabiki shouts as he hobbles off.  Everyone waves
goodbye, and a sigh of relief washes over them all as he fades into the
distance.
	"Boy, you can really choose 'em, can't you?" Nabiki wittily remarks, at
the crying Soun.

	As Francis makes his way to the station, suddenly Ukyo's voice resounds
behind him. "Wait just a minute!" 
	Francis freezes, and turns around to see a towering glaring Shampoo, Ukyo,
Ryoga, Mousse, and Kuno.
	"You not go so soon.  We not finish with you yet!" Shampoo shouts, pulling
out her bonbori.
	"You'll pay for your treachery!" Ryoga shouts, flames of anger rising
behind him.  "I can't allow what you've said about Akane go unpunished!"
	"This is for Ranchan!" Ukyo says, leaping at him with her spatula.  Just
then, everyone jumps in on the brawl.  And so the smoke cloud trails off
into the distance as Francis gets the crap pummeled out of him... again.
And the world fades to black.

The End. :�

And thus concludes the silliest thing I've ever wrote, and my first fanfic.
 I know there are some problems with it; nothing's perfect.  I just hope
this is a good fanfic, but I do have a few concerns.  If I have problems
with these, please help me!
- Sounding like a story, and layout Takahashi might use in one of her manga
stories.
- Using mixed Japanese and NA translation inconsistencies.  i.e. I prefer
Ukyo calling Ranma "Ranchan" over "Ranma-honey", and the "Nekohanten" over
"Cat Cafe".  But I really really hate it when people use Japaneese phrases
in their English fanfics.  Things such as people shouting "Ranma no baka!"
or Kuno calling for his "Osage no onna" and all.  I mean we all know what
it means, but it's inconsistant.
- I want to know what the hell those things that Takahashi always has as
huge statues typically given by Ryoga and Kuno as gifts, or as lawn
ornaments around the place.  They look kinda like badgers or racoons or
something.  (Need an example of what I'm talking about?  Look at the
beginning of the episode where Ukyo sets Ryoga and Akane up on a date...)

Um, I'd like to waste the end of the document thanking Timmy-chan for
sitting and having me constantly pester him about this, and I'd like to
thank Evk for spell-checking my documenting and fixing little errors.  So
if there are misspelled words, they're his fault!  And I'd like to thank
anyone who's willing to take time out of their day to give positive (or at
least constructive) feedback.

  - By WrexSoul
  \/.
  vvv
pfrancks@ionet.net
http://www.ionet.net/~pfrancks/