Looks good; just a few random comments:

On Sat, 02 Jan 1999 00:32:04 EST, you wrote:

    Rouge's face twisted as if she'd tasted something 
unpleasant.  "That venomous, horrible, lecherous, peeping--"

    Akane blinked; there was only one person she knew of that 
Rouge would describe like that.  "Tarou?"

Sounds more like Happy so far....
    

    "--monstrous, ugly, bullying--"
    
    Ryoga frowned.  "Pantyhose was here?"
    
    "--filthy, degenerate, wormlike--"
    

Welcome to Rouget's thesaurus!

    He went through a few slow motions with it.  A weapon was
hardly a necessity for him; his physical strength alone was 
enough against any foe, and that was before even consideration of
his other abilities.  But the sword held a certain nostalgia for 
him, a memory of what he had once been, before he had fully 
awakened to his purpose.  It hummed as he passed it through the 
air.  The metal glistened, so bright it seemed to leave a trail 
of sparks behind as it moved.

    A knock at the door.  He turned, dropping the sword's tip 
until it nearly touched the floor.  Silently, he waited.  If the
door opened and it was not who he expected, he would likely have
to kill them.

"Mr. Yotsuya! Are you in there? I'm here for this month's rent!"

    "Is this plan of the Circle's going to work?" she asked,
unable to entirely disguise her eagerness.  He analysed the
question for a moment; the plan had already been ascribed to the
Circle, not to him.  That was good, as he had wished it to be.

    "It will work," he answered finally.  "By the time the sun 
rises tomorrow, I would guess that nearly all of the Joketsuzoku 
that live will be united behind you."

Yeah, both of them, right?

    Akane rubbed her arm and stared at the wooden boards of the
porch.  The expression on her face was that of someone 
remembering something they didn't really want to.  "Kima said

Technically, should be 'something she didn't' since it's only one
someone.

    Akane fixed Shampoo with a flat look.  "Oh?  Like, say,
trying to make someone love you by magic?  Is that wrong?"

    "Yes!" Shampoo said before she could stop herself.  The
impact of Akane's words and her own reply struck her a moment
later, and she glared at the other girl and turned her head away
to intently examine the detail on a creeping vine that had wound
its way up some of the porch railings from the garden.

But that's something Shamps only tried in fanfics, not for real...
though she probably would have if she had had the means.

    He had been called the Fair once, and fair he had been.  

Now he's working his way past Good into Excellent.

     There was a cave mouth, yawning behind him vast and dark.
>From it, he could hear the breathing of his kin as they slept.
Sleep warded off the hunger, but only for a little while.

Extra > in that paragraph.

    "The lady I see in my dreams," Plum explained carefully, 
gripping her crayon in one small fist.  "She lives under the
earth and helps to keep the evil away."

"Silly kid. That's a picture of Lucy Van Pelt you're drawing!"

Someday I want to read a story where a character has a dream that
seems like a premonition, but turns out to just be a dream.

"You know, I never wondered about this before, but how do you 
have a working phone out in the middle of nowhere like that?"

    The Guide glanced to the old-style rotary phone by the door
and shrugged.  "I know it works.  That is enough for me."

    "But how?  There's no phone lines out here, or..."

It tragic story of mabellniquan....

    The air of tension relaxed slightly.  Dai Jin threw a
friendly arm around Shampoo's shoulders.  "You did good, kid.
Come on back with me and have--"

    There was the wet sound of an impact.  Dai Jin gasped.  
Shampoo looked in shock at the bloodied arrowhead and the short 
length of wooden shaft protruding from Dai Jin's left breast, 
piercing her heart from behind.

"Have 'arrrrgh?' Why Shampoo want have arrrgh with you? Shampoo no
understand!"

BTW, any particular reason why Die, Jim didn't get <angle brackets>
with that last line? Not that I mind -- I've always thought that the
reader should be able to tell the language by context anyway -- but
you really oughtta be consistent.

    The other Council members were grabbing up their weapons.
>From the forest that surrounded Watcher's Hill, shapes that were
murky even in the light from the lanterns emerged, silent as the
wind.  Dozens of winged figures, some holding bows, others
gripping spears or swords.

Extra >

    Out of the corner of her eye, Shampoo saw Fang Shi's weapon     
waver slightly at the sight of the man.  "<Who are you who dares
to attack the Council of the Joketsuzoku at their most sacred
place, then?>" she snarled.

Not clear whether the "she" refers to Fang or Shamps.

   "<TRAITOR!>" Gu Shu screamed, cutting her off.  She darted,
axe held overhead, towards Fang Shi.  A single arrow arced from a 
bow and pierced her eye.  Gu Shu dropped screaming.  Amidst the 

Again, there's some possible pronoun confusion here. Also, I'd put a
comma after dropped.

    The golden-haired man laughed powerfully.  "<Brave little
one.  I liked you.  It is unfortunate you must die so young.>"

"<So before we kill you, we're going to dunk you in Spring of Drowned
Cologne.>"

   An overhead swing broke the collarbone of a foe; ribs
shattered under the heel of her foot.  A quick parry knocked 
aside a spear thrust, a return strike smashed the thing's 
grinning, florid face in.

thrust; a

    "Incredible," Ryoga said softly.  "Ranma, Mousse and I went
through dozens of them like they were nothing, and yet they 
manage to kill a dozen warriors as fine as the Joketsuzoku 
Council and force the two survivors to flee like cowardly dogs."

    Bi Shou's eyes narrowed.  "You call us liars and cowards?" 
she hissed.  "You dare, outsider filth?"

    "I call it suspicious," Ryoga answered.  "And whatever
happened, these two--" He indicated the two Phoenix with his
hand.  "--were prisoners, and had nothing to do with it.  
Whatever your laws are, I hope you don't execute people for
crimes they don't commit."

He's right, but it seems a bit odd for Ryoga to be pointing this out.
He's a bit gullible, and tends to get carried away with his passions.