Ranma and the Holidays: Chapter II
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Ranma's The Night Before New Year's


'Twas the night before New Year's, and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, except Ukyou, P-Chan, and Mousse;
The gi were hung by the engawa with care,
In hopes that Akane soon would be there;

Soun and Genma were all drunk on their tatami,
While visions of Happousai lingered in their heads;
And Kasumi in her apron, and I in my pants,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap.

When out in the koi pond there arose such a chatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I leaped like a flash.
Tore out the shutters and ripped away the sash.

The moon on the breast of my beloved innazuke,
Gave the lustre of mid-day to the others below.
When, what to my shocked gaze should appear,
But a miniature Cologne, and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so wrinkled and muled,
I knew in a moment it must be that old ghoul.
More rapid than Kuno her coursers they came,
And she whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
Cologne and her sleigh on the new-fallen snow,
"Now, LINLIN! now, RANRAN! now, RYOGA and AKANE!
On, SQUIRTLE! on SNORLAX! on, TOFU and REI!
To the top of the engawa! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurrican fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount up the pie;
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
WIth the sleigh full of manga, and Cologne too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof.
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my fist, and was turning around,
Down the ceiling the old ghoul came with a bound.

She was dressed all in fur, from her head to her foot,
And her clothes were all tarnished with Happi, the coot;
A bundle of manga she had flung on her back,
And she looked like a peddler just opening the pack.

Her eyes -- how they schemed! her dimples how many!
Her cheeks were like nightshade, her nose like a cherry!
Her droll little mouth was drawn around like a bow,
And the beard of her chin was as odd as the snow;

The stump of an herb she held tight in her teeth,
And the smoke it encircled her head like a wreath;
She had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook, when she maniacally chuckled.

She was skinny and small, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw her, in spite of myself;
A wink of her eye and a twist of her head,
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread;

She spoke not a word, but went straight to the loot,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a hoot,
And laying her finger aside of her nose,
Laid essence, then up the chimney she rose;

She sprang to her sleigh, to her team gave a whistle,
And away they all leaped like the down of a thistle.
But I heard her exclaim, ere she drove out of sight,
"HAPPY NEW YEARS TO ALL, AND TO RANMA NIGHTY-NIGHT!"


                                 The End?

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Author's Notes:

  I really didn't expect to do anymore on R&TH, but I
have heard just one too many Christmas songs!  So,
this might not make complete sense, but I tried to make
a parody of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas.

	-*-
	 jASON mCcLASKEY

  'To write is to live, to be silent is to die in vain...'