Subject: Re: [FFML] [fanfic][samuraishodown] And Giving Fuji: Prologue
From: Vincent Diamante
Date: 12/16/1998, 1:48 PM
To: Sean Connor
CC: David Johnston <rgorman@telusplanet.net>, ffml@fanfic.com

On Wed, 16 Dec 1998, Sean Connor wrote:

   She slept until, a fire burned.

No comma after "until".

Yes comma after "until."

No comma after 'until'.  However, even without the comma, this sentence
doesn't make much sense.

Okay...there ARE reasons as to why there is a comma there.

1) A balance of ideas.  On one side, a lack of activity; on the
   other, ferocious activity.

2) Slightly more clear definition of Rimururu.  If you've played
   the videogame, you see she utilizes ice in her attacks.  Opposite
   is fire.

3) Partial segue into the next scene.  The mauling and massacre of
   the Ainu village.  In the sentence, a contrast of lack of activity
   and violent activity separated by a comma; in the prologue, a
   delineation of two equally contrasting scenes.

4) Slight emphasis of "a fire burned" as an individual and independent
   idea.

5) "She slept until" is the title of a short story by Mishima Yukio,
   writer who died in 1970...fanatically Japanese, believed that Japan
   was being tarnished by Western Civilization and wanted for the
   country to revert to pre-Meiji era Japan.

Read Mishima Yukio...DAMN good stories.

Sklathill