On Mon, 7 Dec 1998, Lara Bartram wrote:

Date: Mon, 7 Dec 1998 22:12:23 -0500 (EST)
From: Lara Bartram <lara@emunix.emich.edu>
To: FFML <ffml@fanfic.com>
Subject: [FFML] [spamfic]  No Need for 30 Ranmas


No Need for 30 Ranmas

I have enough problem with two...

a spamfic
by Lara Bartram


	"Not there!"
	*SPLOOSH*
	Ranma crawled out of the spring.  And so did Ranma.  "What the
hell didja do THAT for?" they yelled in unison, then looked at each other.

Oh boy...spring of drowned twins, part I.

	"Pay attention!" Genma yelled, then kicked Ranma again, sending
him flying into the spring.
	*SPLOOSH*
	Ranma crawled out of the spring.  And so did Ranma.  "Just hold it
a damn minute!" they yelled in unison.

Spring of drowned girl, part I. You'd think the Jusenkyou springs had nothing
but animals and girls...

	"Hold it!" the second Ranma (female form) cried.  "What's going
on?"
	"Very bad spring of drowned twins," the guide replied, scurrying
up.  "Go haywire when already cursed customer uses."

Ranma 1: Does that me we can't sue?
Ranma 2: Sue? Who's she?

	"Thanks a lot!" all Ranmas muttered.
	"Don't be so rude, boy!  Girl!  Whatever!"  With that, Genma
booted all three Ranmas back into the spring.

Spring of Drowned Twins, part II. Who needs cloning when you have Jusenkyou?

	Ranma crawled out, followed by Ranma and Ranma.  And so did three
more Ranmas of various genders.

Various genders? There's only two genders that I can think of, unless Ranma fell
into the spring of Pat...

[Half an hour later]

	"All right!  Hold it!  I am the original Ranma and I ain't
changin' my name!"

Copyrighted 1993, R. T. and Viz. 

	The others all stared at him.  "WHAT?" the yelled together,
deafening each other.
	"I said I ain't changin' my name.  You gotta pick new names!"
	The others thought about it for a moment.

(Singing) "The name game...Ranma!" Ranma, ranma, bo banana ...fe fi famma,
ranma...or something like that.

	"OK," one Ranma (male) said.  "Then I'm... Sanma!"
	"I'll be... Sanko!"
	"Tanma!"
	"Banko!"
	"Janma!"
	"Yanko!"

I'm wakko, I'm yakko...

	"Shanma!"

Shazam?! (THere's a huge flash of lighnting. This particular Ranma turns into a
superhero with a bokken.)

	"Anko!"
	"Zanma!"
	"Kanko!"

You want to name yourself after a copier company?

	"Ganma!"
	"Janko!"
	"Yanma!"

"Auntie Em! There's no place like Nerima! There's no place like Nerima!"

	"Danko!"
	"Kanma!"
	"Hanko!"
	"Anma!"

Duh...Open Stacey?

	"Tanko!"
	"Banma!"
	"Zanko!"
	"Danma!"

...and Greg. Nah...

	"Shanko!"
	"Hanma!"
	"Panko!"
	"Panma!"
	"Danko!"
	"And I'm Ranko!"
	The last one.  "Ran...  Shit!  Oh, Andrew, I guess."

(Andrew face-faults.)
Okay...I suppose I could live with being called Andrew...

	"OK, who's hungry?"
	All hands rose into the air.

Thirty Ranmas, one panda, one all-you-can-eat buffet place. Not a pretty sight.

end

This was one strange fic.