I suddenly got into a Voltron mood. :)
Wow. Voltron. THAT takes me back. I always pictured
the early days of trying to get the "form Voltron" procedure
right as being sort of difficult.
"Form - feet and ankles! Form - knees and shins! Form -
thighs and hips! Form - lower back and tummy! Form... this
is taking too long. We have to speed up the process somehow."
Hehehehehe.
The speech works much better with Vehicle Voltron. There you have fifteen
ships forming the robot, and the leader forms *only* the head. The red and
green lions actually only form the arms. "Form feet and legs. Form arms
and... arms. And I'll form... the torso! Er, and the head thingy, too."
He rose from his throne and descended the steps so that he could meet him
as
an equal. He offered his hand. "Zarkon."
"Any relation to The Great Prophet, Zarquon?"
"No."
"Ah."
Hehe. :) "Er... how much time do I ha-"
Alfor, King of Arus, betrayed no sign.
That seems a little incomplete. Maybe "no sign of pain" or "discomfort."
Hmm. Perhaps.
pride; she was by nature shy and uncertain, but she was at her best under
pressure and always performed bravely and to the best of her ability.
You use "best" twice there.
Good catch.
Zarkon grunted. "A fine boy but he must learn some discipline." He
Comma after "boy," I think.
Well, in my mind Zarkon said it without pause. I'll think about this.
A very nice sequence between the two kings. Well done.
Thanks. :)
I like this part too, the education of royalty thing. Royalty is weird,
even
good royalty. They have to do some odd stuff in the course of their
duties,
and it requires a mindset foriegn to most people. You capture that nicely
in this story.
Thanks again. Yes, royalty is a strange thing. And, in a lot of anime,
future societies are controlled by monarchies. Don't know it that's a
comment about the nature of the human race or if it's the fact that most sf
is thinly-disguised fantasy. :)
"Only for a short time." She tiled the staff she was carrying slightly so
that the green gem at the top was at her eye level. "There is still
something about my magic that objects to working with a machine. And the
more complex the machine, the more difficult it is to force the bonding."
This would explain why she never put together a large army of instant
monsters to go after Voltron. I always wondered about that. She seemed
to be able to create them almost out of thin air - it seemed silly to send
them
out one at a time.
Typical bad guy thinking. "We outnumber Conan a hundred to one! Let's rush
him - one at a time!" Same thing in any Bruce Lee movie.
hand, to reveal once-again flawless skin. "Do not think to lecture me,
Alfor. I am in complete control. Do not ever doubt that."
Oh sure. Here's my card - Sorcerers Anonymous. Come to one of our
meetings. We can help.
Hehehehehe.
And then, much sooner than he had expected, we was *there*. And he was
not
A "we" crept into that sentence there uninvited.
D'oh!
weapons that wanted to destroy him but as often as not destroyed others
that
"Wanted to destroy him" seems a bit awkward, unless he's starting to
anthropomorphize the other ships as well as his own.
That's kind of what I was going for. Hard to explain, but I wanted him to
see will in the other ships as well as his own.
Hey, that was pretty cool. What got you in a Voltron mood, if I may
be so bold as to ask? Are they still showing it somewhere these days?
Ah. Evidently you haven't heard about "Voltron: The Third Dimension".
Check out http://www.wep.com/voltron3.html to read about the new series. No
dub this, it's completely an American production, with much of the original
voice actors and Tim Curry as Lotor. All rendered in 3D, too.
Alas that the plots haven't improved much - in fact, they're worse. But
it's *Voltron*, which is good enough for me. :)
It's on every Saturday in my neck of the woods, so I've been taping it.
That's what got me in the mood. :)
Looking forward to the second half.
Thanks, and thanks for the C&C.
Grayson Towler
-Richard