Subject: [FFML] FFML Reviews List for the week of: November 6, 1998
From: "Shunsuke" <shunsuke@mailcity.com>
Date: 11/27/1998, 9:26 AM
To: ffml@fanfic.com

                   The FFML Reviews List
                   =====================

For the week of: November 6, 1998
Reviewers:
      Paul Arezina <arezina@acad1.stvincent.edu>
      Helen Szeto  <Helen@eiw-ca.com>
      Shunsuke     <shunsuke@mailcity.com>
Synopses Submitted: 13

* * * * *
[AD Police]

- - - - -
Title: Deception
Series: AD Police
Genre: Dark/Action
Author: Daniel Hanneld
Email: daniel@milner.com or DHanneld@aol.com

Date Sent to FFML:  05/11/98
Size:  128kb

Summary:

An attempt to bridge ADP and BGC.  Leon is assigned to the Normal
Police to try and track down an illegal boomer manufacturing plant.  A
new type of boomer is let loose in MegaTokyo.

{Shunsuke}
   "Some one had taken great care to sweep away the larger derbies..." 
   I thought it was supposed to be an illegal arms manufacturer, not a 
   haberdashery. ^_^  (A spell-checker wouldn't catch your errors, Mr.
   Author, that isn't the problem.)

   Not bad for a first-time effort, certainly better than most first
   stories (like mine was), it does have the feel for the city and the
   characters, although its tone is much closer to BGC than ADP.  ADP
   is a much darker series than this, though that's not a complaint.

   I don't believe everything gets solved at the same time in real 
   life, but the plausibility of events here is better than most 
   "solve everything" fics.  Hopefully we'll see more stuff like this.

* * * * *
[Ah! Megami-Sama]

- - - -
Title: Stepping Into Keiichi; Prelude, Chapters 1-4 Draft
Series: Ah! My Goddess
Genre: Alternate Universe, 'Self-Insert'
Author: b. b. brittain
Email: turtyl@montana.com

Homepage: http://www.megami.net/~turtyl --Looking for a home at the moment...

Date Sent to FFML: 2 November, 1998
Size: 150k, in 4 separate posts

Summary:

Patrick 'Topper' Thompson has been grounded for his horrible grades at
school.  Depressed, he sulks in his room, watching Anime tapes,
specifically the Ah! My Goddess OVAs.  On the night of a terrible
storm, the lights go out and he gets knocked out...only to find
himself in something beyond description.

He finds himself on the set of which Ah! My Goddess was filmed.  He
also meets Belldandy...or rather Mika, and a whole slew of actors and
actresses attached to the filming.  What will Topper do in a world
like this?  Why are these people acting so strangely?  And why the
heck didn't he take a drama class this year at college...

{Paul}
   Definitely not the typical SI... heh. The world of anime-as-film is
   certainly interesting, particularly with the hundred-and-one
   subclauses that manage to work their way in... like that whole
   magic-as-magic discussion.  Interesting to see that the otaku's
   knowledge of the series means just slightly more than nothing...
   and that he's woefully unprepared for what comes ahead. The poor
   boy's confusion shines through in just about every episode... could
   it be that he is more Keiichi than the original K1? Could be, could
   be... 14 or 15 out of 20.

{Shunsuke}
   Now *HERE'S* an interesting take on the character insertion genre, 
   it takes place in a world where it's not just the "real" people who
   play the roles, but the magic of the world, as though a Belldandy 
   could exist but doesn't...it's an interesting twist that I've not 
   seen before, and on that merit alone, it's worth a look.  Plus, the 
   characterization and storyline make this work too, as does the fact
   this writer understands English.

* * * * *
[Boku no Marie]

- - - - -
Title: Music-Box Angel, Episode 4: Nu Sommes Du Soleil
Series: Boku No Marie (My Dear Marie)
Genre: Romantic Comedy/Drama
Author: Matthew Johnston
Email: matt2518@gladstone.uoregon.edu

Homepage: http://gladstone.uoregon.edu/~matt2518

Date Sent to FFML: 11/3/98
Size: 32K (about 5000 words)

Summary:

Marie washes dishes, Hiroshi has a plan, Tanaka sets a date, and Mari
gets all starry-eyed.  All this, plus a peek in a few diaries!

(This is the final episode of Music-Box Angel.  Go to the web page
above for the all-original Music-Box Angel theme song in MIDI format.)

{Paul}
   First... episode 5, ne? Second... niiiiice closer. You're right
   about the whole epilogue nature of this... may even want to call it
   an epilogue, since it does a very nice job of tying things up. We
   see a lot of reactions that were curiously (or perhaps deliberately)
   absent from earlier chapters...then again, there's been precious
   little time to sit and think as of late, hasn't there? Very nice
   WAFFy bit with Hiroshi and Mari at the end... and some oddly direct
   reflections on the part of Marie as well. A nice closer to what has
   been a good series... even if I didn't know the source at all. 14
   or 15 out of 20.

{Shunsuke}
   Now here's a different ending to a WAFFy fic, some but not all the
   issues resolved, and some doors open for exploring without becoming 
   silly.  Marie doesn't have any definite direction to go, she has 
   many choices, yet you know whichever it is it will be the right
   one.  This is a better end than most, and not just for the positive 
   result.

   About the diaries, in a couple of cases saying whose words are
   whose would be an idea; unless being used as a tool to surprise 
   readers, it can be temporarily confusing.

* * * * *
[El-Hazard/Escaflowne]

- - - - -
Title: Reunions
Series: El Hazard/Escaflowne
Genre: Crossover
Author: Matthew Lewis
Email: maybeso@ican.net

Homepage: N/A

Date Sent to FFML: 11/02/98
Size: 20kb

Summary:

Van goes searching to find Hitomi, only he encounters Afura Mann
instead. A very quick effort.

{Shunsuke}
   And so it reads.  This *really* requires prior knowledge of both 
   series, and is tough going otherwise.  As it stands, it's only 
   worth it for the two series' fans.

   I don't know if Makoto would be desperate enough for Ifurita to do 
   what he does here, but the central plot point of combining certain
   people's needs to cause something to happen works.  But, this is 
   really only a fragment of an idea; without a lead-in to give some 
   idea to fans unfamiliar with the two series, this may not make 
   sense.  As part of a larger story with Makoto and Van trying to 
   make their worlds perfect, with trials and troubles along the way, 
   it could work.

* * * * *
[Final Fantasy III]

- - - - -
Title: Life's Little Triumphs
Series: Final Fantasy III (FF6 in Japan)
Genre: Continuation/Vingettes/WAFF/Introspection
Author: "Dot Warner"
Email: dot_warner17@hotmail.com

Homepage: members.xoom.com/dotchan

Date Sent to FFML: 11/3/98

Summary:

What happened to the various good guys after Kefka was defeated.  So
far, finished parts are...

Prologue--Rehash of the final battle with Kefka and the kick-a$$
ending

Cyan Garamonde--Cyan rebuilds Doma, and does some thinking

Sezter Gabbiani--Setzer decides to go look for Daryl

Edgar Roni Figaro--Edgar advises Sabin to start a dojo and meets the
woman of his dreams.

Sabin Rene Figaro--Sabin gets Duncan's blessing to recruit new
students and attends a formal dinner with Edgar's new romantic
interest

Locke Cole--Locke and Celes share a tender moment

{Paul}
   WAIWAI! Final Fantasy III fanfic that isn't mind-numbingly awful!
   Umm...gomen. But my experience has been... well, enough about that.
   I can BELIEVE everything. As in, there are no characters acting so
   insanely out of character that it isn't funny. As in, the rest of
   the world is getting involved and it's not just isolated incidents.
   As in, I laughed when it was funny and got all misty-eyed when it
   was touching. As in... 16 or 17 out of 20. Nice work.

* * * * *
[Iczer/Teknoman]

- - - - -
Title: Operation: Lightsphere (phase 3 ch.1)
Series: Iczer/Teknoman
Genre: Action/Drama
Author: Andrew Dynon
Email: adyn1@students.latrobe.edu.au

Homepage:

Date Sent to FFML: 7 Nov 98
Size: Approx 17 kb

Summary:

The team prepares to leave Earth...

{Shunsuke}
   This part reads more like a mass-borrowing of scenes from other TV 
   and anime series (ST:TNG, Ranma, et al.), if it isn't totally 
   original.  (If it is, I watch too much TV.)  This chapter is more
   emotional and set in the mundane than other parts, a change from 
   the earlier parts; it feels like everybody's taking a break from 
   the action to do something else, both the characters and the story
   author.  And like any break, if you catch your breath you can 
   start running fast again, something we'll probably see next time.

* * * * *
[Patlabour]

- - - - -
Title: Patlabor: Personal Files, Episode 05
Series: Patlabor
Genre: Um... I dunno.  Continuing
Author: David A. Tatum
Email: desaix@sysnet.net

Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Acropolis/7872/fanfics.htm

Date Sent to FFML: 11/6/98

Summary:

General chaos ensues as the blackout starts riots and further glitches
cause an aircraft to head off course and crash into Tokyo.  For this
episode, I'm making a special appeal for people to please give me
helpful comments and criticism- it didn't come out nearly like how I
wanted it to because of various problems (which I mentioned in the
opening notes to the story).

{Shunsuke}
   Well, it's definitely not sabotage (with the last chapter I thought
   it might be), no person could do this much damage deliberately sans
   nuclear weapons.  There's a little less focus on the interpersonal
   relationships in this part, although the miscommunication between
   Asuma and Noa sums up the situation worldwide and among the pilots. 

   This is another chapter where I question whether events the author 
   puts in would actually happen. (I.e., if the airlines were at all
   unsure, would they have planes in flight at midnight of the new
   year?  And why wouldn't they plan for it?)  The way things are
   portrayed are well done (the author must have watched the Rodney
   King riots or some sports championship riots), with nothing
   ridiculous or exaggerated.

   One minor technical note: in all airports world-wide, English is
   the standard language for international flights (yes, even the
   French use it ^_^).  Hey - why didn't Kyosuke make the plane change 
   course? O_-

{Helen}
   The story's getting better, but I'm not sure whether the continuing
   style of description of character's really works.  I mean that we have
   so far read more of what 'other' character's think of certain main 
   characters.. maybe it's time for the actions to speak louder than words.

* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2]

- - - - -
Title: Alternatives -- Chapter 9
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Continuation
Author: Mike Allen
Email: allenk@gte.net or m_k_allen@hotmail.com

Homepage: home1.gte.net\allenmk

Date Sent to FFML: 11/4/98
Size: Approximately 28K

Summary:

The trip to Jusenkyo to create more Ranma's just got a little more
complicated.

{Shunsuke}
   Some interesting twists happen along the way, like Ranko seizing 
   the opportunity to explain away Ryouga being a pig without Akane 
   noticing; I suppose that will end up being key in the next part.  
   It was quite heart-breaking when it came to the part about Genma's 
   final betrayal and atrocity: this seems too far, even for him,
   though I'm not criticizing the author's idea by saying that.  I 
   just found it a horrifying thought that he would do such a thing.  

   There's a bit of a plot error here (there's been a few small ones 
   throughout the series): why suddenly at the end is Ranma to be 
   split again for Ukyou without any discussion, and what now will 
   become of Ranko?  (Not paired up with Ryouga, I hope. ^_^)  The 
   story and series otherwise work and make sense, there's just that 
   once in a while....
   
- - - - -
Title: Dies Irae
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Dark
Author: Alan Harnum
Email: harnums@hotmail.com

Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Bay/9758/fics.html

Date Sent to FFML: November 3rd
Size: 9k

Summary:

Man, in his folly, seeks to defy the gods.  In his hubris, he believes
that he may match himself against them and emerge victorious.
Sometimes, he can even win.  For a time.

But the gods are patient.  They can wait for their vengeance.

Some of them, however, are less patient than others.

{Paul}
   Ouch. *shudder* Ladies and gentlemen, the Dark Side of Alan Harnum.
   Haven't seen anything this bad since... since... hmm... Ranma's
   world of demons in the Shadow Chronicles. Bad as in utterly and
   completely hopeless, not bad as in not well-written. I was biting
   my nails all through this, waiting for someone, somehow, to pull
   off a technique and save everyone...but life doesn't always deal
   happy endings. A truly chilling tale, told in classic Harnum
   fashion, leaving me wondering when the movie's going to come out
   and if it will be this good... 18 and up out of 20.

- - - - -
Title: Eugenics Chapter's 2B - 3A
Series: Ranma 1/2 - Final Fantasy
Genre: Dark Crossover
Author: Phillip Masters
Email: PhilMasters@webtv.net

Date Sent to FFML: November 4, 1998

Summary:

Things in the past seem to be going from bad to worse as time moves
on.  The future is looking a little brighter, but how long will it
last?

{Paul}
   Hoo boy. Nice cross, so far as I can draw uneasy parallels.
   Poetically bleak past... reminds me a bit of the above apocalypse
   fic, actually. And I was chortling all the way through Ryle and
   Aeris's "date". Though I have yet to see where and how the stories
   will tie together, I don't mind not knowing. 14 or 15 out of 20.

{Shunsuke}
   Now that were a few parts into the series, the brutal suddenness of 
   the first part has worn off and the unpleasant situation reads like  
   a reality of "what do we do now?"  I still don't know if I buy 
   Cologne's handling of current events, whether she'd still have her 
   old mindset of Ranma and Shampoo's marriage being on.

   Because the two storylines of the present and future don't quite 
   mirror each other in terms of events, it's hard to follow this
   series.  In time, though, this is the kind of series you'll have
   to read twice to pick up on things you missed and the reward for
   sticking it out will show then.  (Yikes, I'd hate to think that
   Cologne is Aeris. <shudder> ^_^)

- - - - -
Title: Hearts and Minds Prelude 9 -- Kasumi and Nabiki: Someday
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Continuation
Author: Gary Kleppe
Email: kleppe@execpc.com

Homepage: http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html

Date Sent to FFML: 10/26
Size: 53 kb

Summary:

With the group about to leave to defend the Amazon village, Kasumi
visits Nabiki in the United States to fulfill an old promise. We flash
back to see Kasumi training under Priestess Kaede along with Nabby's
rise to power in the business world. Kasumi gets a surprise visitor,
and the spirit of her mother shows how much she trusts her.  Nabz'
ambition carries her into the vice-presidency of the UCF corporation
-- but what will be the cost to her?

{Shunsuke}
   A little more surreal and magical than the other parts, the "Spirit 
   Mother" idea against Nabiki's capitalistic real-world nature seems 
   like an attempt to compare the dichotomy of god vs. science; both 
   come from the same place, are inextricably linked, yet others try 
   to view them always as separate.

   Or maybe I'm just reading too much into things. ^_^

   (Just for the record, I somehow get the feeling this Kaede is a
   Blue See 9 reference; the two certainly seem alike. ^_^)

{Helen}
   The second re-writing of the HaM preludes runs much smoother....as 
   to be expected.  It brings out the possibilities of Kasumi being much 
   more than what most writers would portray her.  It's refreshing to see
   that Kasumi moves beyond the stereotypical "Oh my" conversations...
   And to be able to see Nabs in action... <grin> Mweh. Heh. Heh.  I like
   the comparison that Kleppe draws between the skills of the martial 
   artists of Nerima and Nabiki's own skills... essentially: to make the most
   money with the least effort... and she does it so well... ^_^

- - - - -
Title: Illuminations, Chapter 18
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Dark, Alternaverse
Author: Freemage
Email: freemage@hotmail.com

Webpage: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Corridor/9118/EastWindow/Eastwindow.html

Date Sent to FFML: Nov 4, 1998

Summary:

Series is an alternate explanation of the true motivations of many R.5
characters.  The Illuminati have been ID'd as the force behind it all,
but their agent remains unknown.

Episode 18: Run, Ranma, Run.  A discussion.  Soun gets trapped.  Baths
are taken.  Oh, and the Return of the Pig.

{Paul}
   Oh dear. Ranma has seen one too many movies where the protagonist
   speaks only in monosyllables. You know the type. But he is following
   the path of a True Martial Artist, or at least an angsty one, now.
   And if I didn't know any better, I'd say Genma was taunting Soun
   from beyond the grave, one last time. Kasumi's non sequitur was
   absolutely perfect, as was Ryoga's reaction... waiting for the next
   part to maybe find out some of what's going on in Ranma's head,
   however. 14 or 15 out of 20.

{Shunsuke}
   I haven't really read much of this series, so I can't really think
   of it on its own, I keep getting Garden Of Eva flashes in my head.  
   I can't say too much about it other than it was easy to read and
   follow, and with some interesting scenes (Akane willing to listen
   sounding plausible?) I'm tempted to start from the beginning.

   Last thing to note about this one is that sometimes authors use 
   profanity with either the intent to shock, to try and prove
   something, or to set the mood.  With the last, writers often end
   up doing it wrong.  Here, though, the single profanity occurs early
   in the story and feels like it was thrown out in an offhand manner,
   in a perfectly appropriate place.  There's nothing wrong with the
   occasional f***, s***, or other word as long as it gets used in the
   right way.  Other authors, take note, this is how to do it.

- - - - -
Title: [No title given   -ed]
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Continuation
Author: Jim Lazar
Email: jimlazar@earthlink.net

Homepage: http://home.earthlink.net/~jimlazar/anime

Summary:

A series chronicling sixty years of Akane Tendo's life.  Some happy
moments and some sad. Akane and Ranma love each other, but is that
enough to keep them together? Will James Davidson ever finish the book
on Akane's life he is writing? Not if his fiancee, Hanaki Ono, keeps
distracting him.  Chapter Summary:

[Given the date of its release and the week of this list, this story  
 is assumed to be Childhood Of A Modern Dynasty part 7.]

{Shunsuke}
   Even without an existing Jusenkyo, it still wreaks havoc, and even 
   without a malicious Cologne, she's still causing damage.  I won't 
   even bother ask "can it get any worse", because you just know it 
   will.  (You're a couple of years off with that monolith, though.)

   This is definitely readable, and the portrayal of characters fits, 
   though I question their decision making on some things (but if it 
   fits the character, go with it).  Because the story focuses solely 
   on the four travelers, it tires a little toward the end; if there    
   had been one or two switches back to James and Hanaki to discuss 
   things, it might have served as natural breaks for the reader.  
   But otherwise, good reading.

- - - - -
Title: Shampoo 1/2 Chapter 7: Severing the Ties That Bind (Prose Version)
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Alternate Universe
Author: D.B. Sommer
Email: sommer@3rdm.net

Summary:

A prose rewrite of chapter 7 (Can't believe I started this series out
in script.*SIGH* ) Only minor changes in a couple of scenes. Basic
summary: Cologne brings RanRan and LinLin to Japan to take back
Shampoo. Then Ryouga tries to get a part for a stove (while Tsubasa
tries to stop him) and ends up going across time and space with
another certain wanderer.

{Paul}
   Heh. Back in the good old days when this series was actually funny.
   Not that the current turn it's taken is BAD, mind you, but the humor
   is welcome.  And funny in many, many places, particularly with the
   seemingly throwaway gag of Ryoga meeting up with Doctor Who... but
   comedy, by its nature, doesn't entail changes or hardship or
   anything to inspire character growth, so it's probably for the
   better that the series changed. But this part is still good enough
   to command 15 or 16 out of 20.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

End of the FFML Reviews List for the week of: Oct. 31 - Nov. 6, 1998



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